“It’s kind of scary to hear Casey that way, but it’s better than the alternative.”
“And how about you? You feeling super happy?” He smirked.
“No. I never do though.”
“How were the gardens?” He took another bite of the red tomato.
“Uneventful. How’s the tomato?”
“Good. Want a bite?” He held it out toward me.
“No thanks, I had one.”
He brushed his fingertips across my cheek. “They put you to work I see.”
“Dirt?”
“Uh huh. It looks good on you.”
“I look good dirty, eh?”
“My guess is you’d look good any way.”
“Flattery will get you nowhere.”
“I don’t need flattery to get you. We both know that. I was merely telling you what I thought.”
“You’re cocky.”
“And you say it like it’s a bad thing. You like that about me. You want a confident man.”
I groaned. “Don’t even start on what kind of man I want. That stupid petitioning ceremony thing is tonight.”
He laughed. “It should make for an entertaining evening.”
I got a bad taste in my mouth. “Entertaining for you maybe, if you like to watch me suffer.”
“Drink some Pesco beforehand. It will be painless.”
“Yeah until I get so drunk that I accept some bear as my mate.”
“I won’t let you do that.”
“Oh yeah? You’re going to step in and stop it?”
“Something like that.” He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. “I’m heading out for a bit.”
“Where?” How was he busier than I was when this was my parents’ place?
“Nowhere important, I just wanted to check in.”
“Don’t play all evasive with me.”
“Your father wants some bonding time with you. I need to get scarce.”
I put a hand on my hip. “Fantastic.”
“Don’t view it that way. Think of it as an opportunity to garner more information.”
“Spoken by a true intel man.”
He shrugged. “We need to use any advantage we have.”
“At least tell me where you’re going.”
“I’m going to talk to your mom.”
“My mom?” My mouth fell open. “Why?”
“Because I also need to get more information.”
“No asking anything weird about me.”
“Define weird.”
I pushed his arm. “Be nice.”
“Are you sure you want that?” He cocked an eyebrow.
“Stop making things sexual when they don’t need to be.”
“I have no idea what you mean.” He smiled wickedly before disappearing the same way he came.
Jared really was infuriating.
“Beautiful weather today.” I jumped on the safest conversation possible as I began my walk with Taliana.
She glanced up to the sky. “It is beautiful. Not a cloud in the sky.”
“Is it usually this nice? Your summers always this temperate?”
“We don’t have the heat and humidity that you do down in New Orleans, that’s for sure.”
“Our summers are brutal.”
“Not that this conversation isn’t interesting, but did you really ask me to join you so we could discuss the weather?” She gave me a knowing look.
“Not exactly, but there’s nothing wrong with a little weather talk every now and again.”
“Is the real conversation going to be about my husband or daughter?” Her eyes twinkled.
“Mostly your daughter, but maybe a little bit of both.”
“Where do we start?” Taliana took the lead and headed into the forest. Although I’d miss the bright sunshine, I didn’t mind the quiet and tranquil feel underneath the trees.
“Has she ever dated a guy who was half decent?”
Taliana laughed. “Now that’s a loaded question to start with.”
“I’m trying to figure out where I stand.”
“Where you stand?” She arched an eyebrow. “What happened to you being just friends?”
“That was before the whole petitioning ceremony part got raised.”
“And you talked to Gareth.” She wasn’t asking a question.
“I take it you know what he told me?”
“And what he showed you.”
“And what are your thoughts?”
“I want my daughter with someone who will care for her, and who will love her. I want her safe, and I want her to reach her potential.”
“Love. That’s beyond a loaded word.”
“Surely you believe in it.”
“In theory. I’ve seen others experience it.” Like Allie and Levi. I’d never seen anything like it. They’d changed each other, but in the best kind of way. It’s as though they were two halves that made the perfect whole. I pretended to find it annoying, but secretly I wanted it for myself. Too bad it wasn’t my fate.
“But it’s not for you?”
“I’m not sure I’m capable of it.”
Taliana shook her head. “You can’t be serious.”
“Why not? You truly believe that everyone has the capacity for love?”
“Not everyone, but you do. You have love for your friends, for a mother you barely remember, yet you don’t believe you’ll ever find romantic love?”
“Maybe it’s about finding the right person.”
She snorted. “Jared, you can lay off the pretense. I can see right through it.”
“There’s no pretense.”
“No?” She tilted her head to the side. “Then of all of the reasons I gave you, why did you focus on love?”
“Because it was the one that didn’t fit.”
“Love can always fit. It’s the people who sometimes don’t.”
“Were you a sage in another life?”
“You mean I’m not in this one?” She smiled broadly.
“You know what I mean.”
“I do.” She stopped in front of a fast moving creek. It was surrounded on all sides by large rocks and stones. She crouched down and dipped her hand in the water.
“Do you agree with Gareth? Do you actually want me with your daughter?”
“Yes.” She didn’t look up. She continued to move her hand back and forth in the water.
“Even though I have no idea how to unleash her powers or whatever?”
“Come here.”
“I am here.”
She touched the ground at her side. “Here.”
“Okay.” I crouched down next to her. “What am I doing exactly?”
“Tell me what water feels like.”
“Water? It feels wet.”
“Put your hand in the water.”
I listened and looked closely at the water. There didn’t seem to be any reason not to.
“Now try again. What does water feel like?”
“Cool and refreshing.”
“Exactly.”
“Is there something I’m missing here?”
She stood up. “No. I was only trying to illustrate that sometimes you don’t really know what something is until you experience it.”
“Meaning I don’t really understand love because I haven’t experienced it?”
She smiled. “There you go again jumping back to love. That’s true, but I was also referring to you helping Vera unleash her gifts. Of course being in love would move that along.” She winked.
“It would also help if someone would tell me what the gifts actually are.”
“Some of our women, fewer every generation, have special abilities.”
“I get that, but what are they?”
“They differ depending on the line the woman is from, but it’s impossible to describe.”
“Let me guess, it’s better to see than hear?”
She laughed. “Gareth used that line with you already?”
“Yes
before showing me,” I looked over my shoulder, “You know what.”
“And I’ll use it again. All you really need to know is it’s all tied up in our healing arts.”
“But Gareth said you saw a vision of me or something.”
“Yes, I did. We can dream walk to the future.”
“Ok…” Now we were getting somewhere.
“It’s another ancient practice our family has been doing for years.”
“And you think Vera can do it too?”
“I almost guarantee it. But that’s enough of that talk for now. Back to Vera.”
“Let’s say I agree to petition for her, how do I win her over?”
“You’re going to petition for her, there’s no reason to pretend otherwise. And you’ve already won her over.”
“In some ways, but that’s different than her picking me in this ceremony.”
“The Petere Ceremony is very important. Mating isn’t something to take lightly. Have you thought any of this through?”
“Aren’t you the one who said you wanted me with Vera? Are you purposely trying to confuse me?” I couldn’t keep up. “Besides, she can always change her mind afterward.” I’d agreed to petition, not officially mate.
Taliana shook her head. “You really think that’s all Gareth wants of you?”
“It’s a start. We can continue getting to know each other before we, uh, seal the deal.” And I was already positive Vera was going to run before that happened.
“She can’t just choose you as her mate. She has to take you as her mate.”
“Yeah, not likely.” I blinked a few times. Were they crazy? There’s no way Vera and I were doing that.
“So quick to back out? What about your mother? Protecting The Society? Vera…”
“I like your daughter, Taliana. I want to find my mom, and I’m sworn to protect The Society, but that doesn’t mean I can mate for life with someone just like that. Besides, why the rush? Can’t it wait?”
“Vera won’t be safe until she takes a mate.”
“What do you mean?”
“Vera is very desirable to a lot of people.”
“Yes, I get that.” She was beyond desirable to me.
“I don’t mean it in that way. We want her to pick a mate by choice, but others don’t believe in choice. If the wrong person finds her they may take matters into their own hands.”
“And force her hand to take over Norco?” I seethed, although my anger was at the invisible enemy and not Taliana.
“They’ll use her to do more than take over Norco. Vera’s more important than she realizes. But I can’t explain everything to her yet. It’s too soon.” Taliana wrung her hands.
“What would have happened if Vera hadn’t come home?” I had a million questions swirling through my head.
“Gareth already had plans to bring her in himself.” She looked down.
“And that would have gone over well.”
“Wouldn’t it have?” She laughed. “I prefer the way it worked out.”
I put aside my other questions. I needed to take things one step at a time. “So what now? I petition for her and then Gareth fills me in?”
“May I tell you something else?”
“Sure. Information is a good thing.”
“I want you with Vera for more than her protection and gifts.”
“Oh?” I raised an eyebrow. She had my attention. “Is it because I’m a Pteron?” I regretted my words immediately. After everything with Robert, I was positive that wasn’t the case.
“This has as much to do with you being a Pteron as it does with Vera being an Ursus. I can see when two people will complement each other. I saw it with Casey and Toby, and I see it with you and Vera. You both need a partner who will challenge you, while also keeping you anchored. There’s so much power and passion in each of you that together the effect could be monumental.”
“Monumental? Giant wars to change the world? What is it with you guys and making everything so big?”
“We’re making it big because these things are important.”
“Do you really think I’m good for Vera?” I was trying to figure out how much of her words were out of desperation and how much were out of true feelings. I knew she cared about her daughter, so I doubted she was lying, but you really never know with people.
“I think you could be if you let yourself.”
“In other words you don’t believe in giving straight answers.”
“How do you feel about her?”
“Are we back to the love questions?”
“Not precisely. I don’t think you even know what love looks like.”
“I can’t mate with her.”
“Sure you can. I’m positive it won’t be too difficult of an experience for you.”
“Uh, not talking about the physical part, but now that you brought it up. Do Ursus follow the wolf rules?”
“Are you asking about the biting and sex?”
I rubbed the back of my neck. “I can’t believe I’m having this conversation with you.”
“Don’t get embarrassed. “
“Easy for you to say.”
“This is a new experience. I never expected to see a Pteron so uncomfortable discussing sex.”
“Discussing sex with the mother of the girl in question.”
“So what’s it going to be? Are you going to put in your petition?”
“I don’t have a choice.” There was too much at stake: rescuing my mom, protecting Vera, and looking out for The Society. There was no way I could turn down Gareth’s request. Besides, I didn’t particularly want any bear taking my place.
“Of course you do. We always have a choice.”
“But I do still have one more question.”
“Yes?”
“What does one wear to a petition ceremony? I didn’t exactly pack anything nice.”
She laughed. “I’m sure I can take care of that.”
I should have run. I should have left before it was too late. Why had I agreed to let my mom and Gareth parade me around like some sort of prize to be had? And in this? I looked down at my form fitting emerald green dress. I’d have normally never worn something so girly. Sure it showed off my curves in just the right way, but what was the point of that? I didn’t actually want attention.
“You need to calm down.” Mom watched me.
I continued to pace around the room. “Calm down? I’m about to face a whole crowd of random men who don’t know me but want the political power that would come from mating with me.”
“That’s not all they want you for honey. They are looking for someone to spend their life with.”
“But they don’t know me.”
“In this clan we go more with feel.” She ran her hand through her always perfect long brown hair.
“But they haven’t even met me, so how could they know how they feel?”
“They’ll all meet you tonight. There’s an introduction before the petitions, and remember you are the one in charge. You don’t have to choose anyone tonight.”
“Of course.” I stopped pacing long enough to stare down my mom. “Why on earth would I agree to mate with somebody?”
“Theoretically you might find someone you like.”
“Not a chance.” I was satisfied spending time with Jared. Just thinking about another night with him had my body warming.
“You never know.” She used my momentary break from pacing to mess with my hair. Despite the effort I put into taming it, it still fell in messy waves.
“My hair isn’t going to change anything.”
“Maybe not, but it can’t hurt.”
“I’m not interested in mating with a bear.”
“No. You’re interested in someone else,” she murmured under her breath.
“You better not mean—”
“I didn’t say anything.” She moved around to the front of me while she continued to use her fingers to fix my hair.
I rolled my
eyes. “You need to get over that fascination.” Just because Jared and I were having fun didn’t mean anything real or lasting would develop between us. Neither of us wanted that. “When does this start anyway?”
“As soon as you’re ready.”
“There’s no set start time?”
“Nope. It’s all about you tonight, Vera.”
“Fabulous.” I sighed.
“You never enjoyed being the center of attention, although you liked to pretend you did.”
“Are you done analyzing me?”
“It’s not analyzing. I’m your mother, I know you.” She let go of my hair.
“But I don’t know you.” I didn’t want to get in a fight with her, but I was tired of dancing around the issue.
“Do you want to do this now?” She held her hands out in front of her as if in offering.
“No, we already agreed to look to the future.”
“That doesn’t mean I won’t explain myself to you. I did what I had to in order to protect you and Casey.”
If she was going there, I wouldn’t hold back. “You hid my true identity from me.”
“I thought it was best.”
“For me or Casey?”
Her eyes widened. “I’m sorry that you had to sacrifice to protect her, but if I’d left you here you’d have been at risk too.”
“You considered it? You considered leaving me behind?”
She sighed. “No. I couldn’t. The thought entered my mind, but I knew I couldn’t. I could never leave you.”
“But I had no trouble leaving you.”
“It’s easier for a child.”
“Not as easy as you think.” I’d spent many sleepless nights regretting my decision to leave with Murphy. A lot of my guilt and regret centered on Casey, but I knew I’d hurt my parents with my actions as well.
“I want to fix this, Vera. I want to fix us.” She took my hand.
“And you think pushing me to mate is going to help?”
“No.” She squeezed my hand. “No one’s pushing you to do anything you don’t want to do.”
“But I still have to go out there.” I gestured to the door.
“You’ve done worse.”
“How do you know?”
“You spent months with Murphy. I’m sure you underwent more than a little public embarrassment.”
My time with Murphy’s pack was something I never wanted to think about. How I’d mistaken his feelings for anything resembling love was beyond me. “You admit this is embarrassing?”
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