Belonging: Book Two in The Everett Gaming Series
Page 25
Sydney has found much needed comfort in sleeping on Anthony’s shoulder and chest. He wraps a protective arm around her and she holds onto him. But tonight Sydney was on her back. She looked unsure and uncomfortable and I figured it was an effect of the scene tonight. Anthony and I were on either side of her propped up on our elbows.
“Talk to us, baby? You don’t look comfortable.” I tapped her chin as I searched her eyes to find the root of the issue. Anthony chimed in.
“No covering anything up, sunshine. Communication is necessary for all of us.”
“I…I’m not sure which way I should face. I don’t want to make one of you feel left out.”
Sweet, sweet girl. I looked over at Anthony and knew he and I felt the same about this. We wanted her comfortable, bottom line. She feels too vulnerable on her back and so open, which is why her hands and fingers were playing with one another over her stomach.
I edged closer to her, kissed her goodnight and then gently nudged her to roll onto her side and sleep on Anthony’s chest. That’s been her comfort spot ever since that tragic night in the back of my Range Rover. I pressed my body right up against her and let my arm drape over her side and rest gently on her tummy.
My mind was running with so many thoughts and ideas. One thing at the forefront of my mind since last night was the fact that this was no longer just my house. This was a home for all three of us and we, the three of us, needed to relocate out of this room and upstairs. What had been my room was nearly twice the size of this room and it had two large walk-in closets and a huge bathroom. It would be our room and at the first opportunity, I wanted the three of us to go pick out new linens and redecorate it to suit the three of us. I’d talk to them about this tomorrow.
Tomorrow Anthony and I were helping Sydney get anything she wanted from her old apartment to move in. Matt offered to go with us and help out. I told him it wasn’t necessary as he had his family still in town but he insisted.
I know a lot of shit probably happened in that place, and I was going to push for information. I know she’s seen Chris once and nothing would change quickly for her, but the nightmares are still persistent and come frequently. She needs to open up and Anthony and I need to understand and know everything we can. I would turn that apartment upside down until I knew and understood what she went through. I’ve been patient and haven’t pushed much because I knew there was only so much I could do to force the situation. I knew that I needed to be supportive, and just listen once she did start talking. Down the road, once she found a Dom, he would push matters; but things have changed. She was now mine and Anthony’s. Her well-being was our responsibility, and I was happy to have it in my lap. And I hoped that Anthony would be the strong one tomorrow.
Chapter 21
Saturday, November 30th
Anthony
I woke up, stretched and looked down. Sydney was still fast asleep on my chest. Whoa, wait a second…she was still asleep on my chest which meant that she hadn’t had any nightmares! I leaned over and kissed her forehead and lay back thinking. Even though she had a little breakdown in the lobby, last night was amazing. I loved seeing that collar around her neck and I think she really liked it too. She trusts us on every level a person could trust another. I was moving in but would hang onto the high-rise condo for a while. It was paid for but nothing was keeping me there.
As I was thinking about collecting some additional things from the condo, I remembered that today Colin and I were officially moving Sydney out of that fucked up apartment. Horror flooded my veins as I recalled some of the images that I had seen while I was there collecting size info before my shopping trip. Neither of them knew that I had been there and I felt somewhat obligated to warn Colin before we got there. If he were blindsided with certain things, he’d flip. I knew that I was glad no one was around me when I saw some of those things.
I rolled over onto my side and watched her head slip gently from my chest to the pillow. I wanted to wake her up with my mouth and grew hard at the idea. My mouth found her nipple and laved at it while I rolled the other one in my fingers. Enough nipple play. I was starving. I trailed kisses and flicks of my tongue down to her sweet spot and flicked my tongue at the sleeping clit. She stirred some and parted her legs. I pulled her pink lips apart and dove in.
Eventually she began grinding against my face. While my heart warmed at the fact that she felt comfortable enough and not afraid to move against me, she wasn’t calling the shots here. I gently stilled her hips and glanced up at her. Her face showed me that she was enjoying her wake up call. I continued to lick and tease her and soon heard Colin’s voice.
“You like that, baby?”
She panted her response to Colin that she very much liked it. I know in the beginning when Colin and I started playing sexually with her, she had been very shy and almost afraid to say if she liked, or didn’t like, something. Which made me think about her limit list. I needed to re-familiarize myself with that. Colin had her fill one out when she came to stay with him. It was going to need some updating because things have changed.
“Tell Anthony, baby. Tell him what you like.”
Colin was so in tune with her needs and feelings, it was scary sometimes. He knew what she needed to overcome and he probably had an idea of how to help her. I was grateful for his knowledge.
“Sir, I like the way your tongue feels.”
I smiled against her pussy and slowly drug my tongue up the left side of her clit.
“I like the way your pussy feels on my face, sunshine.”
Colin was tugging on those sweet nipples and I went ahead and worked her towards an orgasm. Her body gets very still and tight right before she comes. It sometimes makes me nervous to feel her body go dead still and then tense because I worry that she’s scared or on the verge of a panic attack. I hold my breath and then exhale when she comes. Only she comes too quietly. Colin recognizes this too. We’ll work with her, but slowly.
I cuddled her in my arms while she came down from her release. Sydney needs quick physical contact after coming. This was something Colin and I had briefly talked about. Colin recognized it from all of his work with submissives. I understood this need. She felt vulnerable and exposed after coming. My heart broke last night as we stood in the lobby and she came crashing down. I had wondered for a moment if it had something to do with the play collar. She’s just not used to someone giving a fuck about her and I think her natural response is to resist comfort. When you don’t have it for so long and then you start getting it, I imagine it would be scary to let someone see that you need them. Sydney’s used to relying on Sydney. That’s all changed.
“Col, want to go for a jog before breakfast?” I thought I’d talk to him on the jog about the apartment. He could tell that I needed to talk to him and while he and I went for the jog, Sydney was going to get dressed and work on making breakfast.
“Baby, Anth and I won’t be gone long.”
I threw on some shorts and running shoes and met him by the door.
“It’s the end of November, Anth. You do know that, right?” Colin gestured his head upward at my shirtless body. I shrugged. I thought the cool air would be good for me.
I was trying to work it up in my head how to tackle this conversation in the short jog that we would be having. By the time we ended up at the end of his street and started to turn, he asked me what was on my mind. It’s like he’s inside my head sometimes.
“What’s up, Anth?”
Fuck. I didn’t want him to be pissed I went to her place.
“Remember when I went shopping for clothes for Sydney?” He panted out a yes response. “That morning, I got angry with Matt for teasing me about wanting to get stuff for Sydney. Gina was supposed to go with me, but I went alone. I had a list of stuff but wasn’t sure about the sizes.” I paused as we rounded the corner and Matt’s house came into view. “I had her apartment keys in my car.” Colin’s jog slowed and I followed his lead and slowed up until we stopped. Brea
thing hard, he held his hands on his hips and looked over at me as the realization of what I had done dawned on his face.
“You went there?” I nodded and he started to pace back and forth in the street. I doubled over and put my hands on my knees to catch my breath. “Why are you telling me this?”
“We’re going there today, Col, and there’s some seriously fucked up shit in there. I didn’t want you to be blindsided.”
Now I could see the crease on his forehead.
“Fuck. How bad?”
“Bad enough, man. Anything is bad enough, isn’t it?” I was a little angry now. How could he just ask how bad it was? Anything out of the norm of what should be in a young woman’s apartment was bad. The shit that was in her apartment was fucking bad.
“Sorry, Anth. That came out wrong. Anything that may have hurt her is definitely bad. So tell me.”
I told him about the closet and he swore while walking up the street away from me. I jogged to catch up with him and then slowed to a walking pace with him. He picked up a golf ball that was in the gutter and hurled it across the greens. I knew it was from being pissed about Sydney’s closet.
“Fuck, Anthony.”
“I know.”
“Do you think he was binding her in the closet?”
I nodded and told him how the leather had rivets in it and some were worn from use. I mentioned the footprints on the wall close to the baseboards too. When I added that part, he clenched his fists and swore again.
“Fucking bastard! You at least got a few swings on him, Anth. I wish I could get hold of him. I’d beat the shit right out of him. Asshole that he is.”
On our way back to the house I filled him in on the coffee table that had the worn legs and the metal rings attached to them. Needless to say, by the time we got back home, we were both a little emotionally exhausted. But I felt better that I told him so he didn’t get surprised.
When we got back, Colin walked right into the kitchen and pulled Sydney into his arms and held her. She was giggling and pushing at his arms.
“You’re all sweaty, Sir!”
“Deal with it, baby,” he joked with her. He pulled himself off of her and took her face in his hands. “I love you, Sydney.”
The “L” word. Fuck me. It wasn’t a surprise to me that he loved her. I knew that we both did. At least she’s heard it and knows the man who said it, meant every bit of it. And good for him to be able to tell her. I’ll tell her too. Once I figure out how to say it.
Chapter 22
Saturday, November 30th
Colin
Sydney stared up at me with a spatula in her hand and a shocked look on her face. She began shaking her head and breathing hard despite my hands being on her to give her strength. What I felt for Sydney was definitely love. Since she’s been staying here, it sort of snuck up on me, just like Anthony. Sydney had embedded herself deep in Anthony and I; and we both loved her. And it was about time she heard me say it. With the new info from Anthony this morning and knowing we were going to that fucking place, I knew that there’d be tears because I was going to push. She needed to know and understand before I did any of that, that I loved her. No matter what she had been through, or what she told me about her past, or what waited for us in that apartment, it wouldn’t change how I felt about her.
“Unconditionally. Do you know what that means, Sydney?” She had tears running down her face and her eyes were red. “It means that no matter what, I love you. No matter what you tell me or what lies in your past, I love you.”
“You can’t love me. No one has ever said that to me. No man.”
Before she could cut herself down, I took the spatula out of her hands and led her to the table. I sat down and pulled her onto my lap and pushed the hair behind her ears.
“I can love you and I do. I don’t say that lightly, Sydney,” I told her firmly.
Anthony bent and kissed the top of her head while I stroked her damp cheek and held her. I knew “love” was almost a foreign word to Anthony, but I knew he loved her too. He’d say it to her once he was ready. Anthony went over to the stove and tended to the pancakes Sydney had going.
“No matter what, Sydney, I love you.” I put her hand over my heart and let her feel it beat for a moment. “This beats for you.” I glanced over my shoulder at Anthony. His back was facing us as he plated pancakes. “And him. This isn’t just a flash in the pan, Sydney. The three of us have something special worth fighting for. Yes, there will be tears and yes, there will be bumps along the way. There will be days when you’re mad at me. But know that no matter what, you are loved. And we’re going to make sure you know exactly what it means to be loved.”
Her pretty blue eyes sparkled and a smile appeared on her face. I kissed her passionately on the lips and ignored the doorbell ringing. We pulled apart when Matt walked into the kitchen with Anthony and barked out a short laugh.
“Form a V and he can’t keep his hands off of her,” Matt joked and bent to put a kiss on Sydney’s head. “Morning, sweetie.”
Many men would be furious over that. Many Doms would take another man outside and teach him a lesson for touching what was his. But I actually was thankful that my best friend and brother in every sense of the word, was affectionate and caring towards Sydney. Sydney hadn’t been touched by a gentle, caring hand in a long time before she fell into our laps. Matt was very gentle with her and I knew he’d always help Anthony and I with her. And in turn, Sydney was starting to trust him more. She no longer leans away from him or holds herself in a tight ball when he approaches her. She’s also not as tense when she has to see him for follow up visits.
Sydney tried to pull out of my embrace saying she needed to set the table. I nuzzled her closer and told her that Anthony and Matt were capable. I needed to hold her, especially after last night, and I thought she needed it. I was infusing strength in her so she could deal with whatever was coming at her apartment. More than ever, I was glad Matt was coming with us.
Anthony pulled up to the curb and put my Range Rover in park. It was a Saturday and there was a lot of activity on the corner near the apartment building. There were a bunch of boys, maybe high school or college aged, just hanging out on the electrical transformer smoking and being obnoxious.
“Come on, baby. Let’s go finish this.” I held her hand as we walked up the steps behind Matt and Anthony as they carried some boxes.
Anthony unlocked the door and we went inside to begin putting this part of her life in her permanent past.
“Sunshine, you tell one of us the second you want to leave, okay? We can come back another time or Colin, Matt and I can come back another time. We don’t want you to feel uncomfortable.”
I winced inwardly as Anthony said that to her because I hadn’t told him I intended to find out what happened to her in this apartment. If it took tears and crying, then that’s what it took. Anthony and I needed to understand so we can better help her and Anthony would understand that. Eventually.
I realized the last time I was here I hadn’t paid much attention to anything aside from Sydney’s body on the floor. Off to the side of the kitchen near the radiator was that fucking space heater with metal cuffs still attached to it. My stomach ached and those pancakes I ate earlier felt like cement bricks in my stomach. Anthony went over to it to remove it from our view while I led Sydney over to the small living room section. I glanced around the small studio apartment but knew we had a task on our hands. There wasn’t going to be an easy way of doing it other than jumping right in.
Matt set out a bunch of boxes with one of them being a trash box. That space heater needed to go out in the trash as soon as possible. I noticed that her floor was clean now and I wondered if Anthony had cleaned it up.
I turned to find Sydney standing in front of Anthony and he had his hands on her waist. I was glad he was going to comfort her when I start asking questions. I didn’t want to be a prick about it, so I walked to her and took hold of one of her hands and tilted her
chin up so she’d know that I wanted to see her eyes.
“Baby, Anthony and I need to know some things.” She looked nervously from me then over to Matt and tried adverting her eyes downward with a frown. “No, baby. Look at me. I think that there were a ton of horrible, hideous things that went on inside this apartment. The more Anthony and I know, the more we can understand, and the better we can help.”
“I think you and Anthony saw the worst, Colin.” She was a brave girl and maintained eye contact with me while I searched her eyes. I shook my head at her though.
“I think we saw a glimpse of what went on here. I want you to show us the rest.”
In that moment, I was afraid my pushing was going to drive a wedge between us. She was a strong little sub. She was our fragile kitten though too. I wasn’t going to allow her to win this battle. It was too important. Then I saw her start to move away, but Anthony held her against him and put his chin on her shoulder.
“It’s okay, sunshine. I’m right here.” He glared at me, which was just as bad as him yelling at me. Again, he’d understand eventually.
“Sydney, where would you like to start?” Matt asked her gently while also trying to lessen the tension in the air.
“Um, I don’t know.” She brought her shoulders up in that scared, defensive move and walked towards Matt. As I watched her walk towards Matt, Anthony grabbed me by the arm.
“What the fuck are you doing, Col?”
“Baby, Anthony and I are going to take this box out and we’ll bring back your mail. Where’s your key for the mail box?”
She pointed to the counter and I motioned for Anthony to grab that fucking space heater on our way out. As we headed towards the dumpster with the box that contained the heater, Anthony and I got into it.
“Why the fuck would you scare her like that, Colin? Did you see her shoulders? She froze in my arms. You’ve made her more terrified than she already was.”