After she wiggles to the side, I unfold my body and pad across the floor. Her gaze is hot against my back, searing my skin as I grab my phone and bring it to my ear.
“Hello?”
“Where the hell are you?” Graham asks.
“Occupied.”
“Damn it, Ford. Just because Lincoln has shaped up a bit, doesn’t mean you have to fill the vacancy.”
“Easy there, captain,” I laugh. “Hoda will be there. She has the files, and I went over everything with her yesterday. She knows where I stand. You don’t really need me.”
I listen to Graham’s tirade, slipping on my pants and shrugging on my shirt. It’s hard to pay attention to what my brother is saying as Ellie sits up in bed, her breasts perky, her nipples in stiff peaks.
She climbs out of bed, her ass so perfectly round I want to palm it. I’m only reminded of the call when I hear Graham mutter a string of profanities.
“Relax, Graham. I heard everything you said.”
“You did fucking not.”
“Okay. You’re right. I didn’t. But I get the gist of it.”
He sighs. “Moments like this, I loathe being the only responsible one out of all of you.”
“I’ll make it up to you.”
“I’ll add it to your tab,” he says. “Oh, before I go—Barrett will be in town in a couple of days. Mom wants everyone at the Farm for dinner. She said something about Linc wanting to get together anyway so it’s perfect timing. I’ll text you when.”
“I’ll be there. Talk to you later.”
Placing my phone back in my pocket, I stretch my arms over my head and catch Ellie watching me.
“What?” I ask.
“I love listening to you talk to your brothers.”
“Why is that?”
She shrugs. “You feel so … safe with them, I guess. Like it seems like you can say whatever you want and you know if you called him back right now, no matter how mad he is at you, he’d help you.”
“True,” I state. “He would. Any of them would. Well, maybe not Lincoln right now, but he has an excuse.”
She disappears in a closet and returns in a purple and white robe. I hate her body being covered and away from my sight. It feels like a barrier, a way to keep me out.
“Want to meet up for lunch?” I offer, feeling her out.
“I have a meeting, actually.”
“Dinner? Or we could go fishing.”
“I haven’t been fishing in forever,” she admits. “Probably not since I left for school.”
“Let’s do it then.”
“Maybe some other time.”
“I’m sorry. Did I miss something here?”
She crosses her arms over her chest. “What do you mean?”
I mimic her posture. “I thought we were passed this whole thing.”
“I can have dinner and an orgasm and not lose my mind, Ford.”
“Seeing me again is losing your mind?” I ask in disbelief. “You’re going to have to explain that one, El.”
There’s no attempt to explain, no words thrown my way to demonstrate why she’s now pushing back a little. She just stands there and watches me in that adorable little robe I want to rip off her damn body.
“Fine,” I sigh, stuffing my wallet in my pocket.
“Fine what?”
“I’ll just keep thinking of ways to win you over.”
Her arms drop to her sides. “Stop trying. Just let things be.”
“And risk losing you? Risk letting you think I don’t care? Sorry, babe. Not happening.”
“Listen, I love being with you …”
“And I love being with you. So what’s the issue?”
“The issue is just because we had sex doesn’t mean things have somehow changed between us.”
“Babe. Everything has changed.”
The air changes, everything now heavier than it was moments ago. Her eyes are filled with an uncertainty that I want to kiss away.
“I’m not going to lie and pretend I don’t feel something different with you than I’ve felt with anyone else.”
“Good to fucking know.”
She shakes her head. “That’s part of the problem, Ford. I don’t know how much of this is just some kind of hold-over emotion from a carefree time in our lives and how much of it is real.”
“You don’t think this is real?”
“I don’t know,” she breathes. “I hope it is. But before I go jumping in this with you—whatever that even means—I need to know this isn’t something we’re doing on a whim.”
“Even if it is, and it’s not, what would be wrong with that, El? We’re two adults that want to spend time together.”
“Spending time together is fine. I quite enjoy spending time with you,” she adds cheekily. “But none of that changes where I want us to go. Not right now.”
“Ellie, I want to—”
“Your knight awaits!” A voice, a very male voice, booms from the entryway.
My gaze snaps from Ellie to the doorway, back to a wide-eyed Ellie. “Who in the hell is that?” I ask.
“Where are you?” he shouts again, his voice much closer. “Ellie?” The last syllable wraps around the doorway as he steps into view. He takes me in and stops dead in his tracks. “And who are you?”
“I was going to ask you the same thing,” I warn.
“Hey, Heath!” Ellie’s voice is too loud, too chipper, to be believable. “How are you?”
“Um, I’m okay,” he draws out, still looking at me. “Confused. But good. Maybe getting better, depending …”
“Want to make some introductions?” I ask, my brows raised.
“Heath, this is Ford Landry. Ford, this is Heath Breckenmeir, my friend that obviously doesn’t realize the key he has is for emergencies only.” She glares his way.
“He has a key?”
“For emergencies,” they say in unison.
I take in my opponent. He’s thin, too thin to be able to put up much of a fight. He’s wearing wire-rimmed glasses and his black hair is more perfectly styled than any man I’ve ever seen. Then he smiles. Wide.
A phone rings in another room and Ellie’s hand smacks her forehead. “Could this timing be any worse?”
“I’m kind of appreciating it right about now,” I note.
“I’m definitely appreciating it,” Heath snickers. “Go get the phone, Ellie.”
“Why don’t you answer it?” Her voice is almost a plea, which makes his snicker turn into an all-out laugh.
“Oh, no, sweetheart,” Heath grins. “This is your problem. I’ll stay right here with Ford.”
I cringe at the term of endearment, my fists balling at my side. “Go on, sweetheart,” I say pointedly to her.
She looks on the verge of panic, but as the ringing starts again, she throws her hands up, mumbles something under her breath, and storms out. Once she’s out of sight, Heath moseys my way.
“I’m just here to go with her to a few wholesalers today,” he tells me. “So while that alpha-male posturing you’re doing right now is so fucking hot, you can ease up a little.”
I don’t respond.
“Or not. For the record, I’m really, really gay.”
“Good to know.”
“Heath!” Ellie’s voice shouts from the kitchen. “Will you come here for a second?”
He tosses me a wink before joining her in the front. I meander to the doorway and listen to their conversation.
“What did you tell him?” she hisses.
“I told him I’m gay,” he admits. “There’s no chance he swings both ways, is there? Hey!” he yelps as I hear a smack that makes me grin.
“Would it have killed you to pretend we have something going on?”
“And why would I do that?”
“To buy me some time.”
“Because you need to get your head together after he just fucked the shit out of you?”
“Heath. Really?”
“Yes, really
. Now, circling back to your question, I couldn’t pretend anything. I couldn’t take my eyes off that hunk of man meat,” he says.
I bite my tongue so I don’t laugh out loud.
“Second,” he continues, “I’m not about to get on his bad side. Did you see his biceps? Wait. You’ve seen his biceps and his triceps and his … Come to think of it, I hate you.”
“Get in line, buddy.”
“You just got dirty with GI-fucking-Joe. I’m proud of you, Ellie. Maybe you’re not too old to learn new tricks after all.”
A laugh comes roaring out of my mouth before I can stop it. I grab the last of my belongings from the table and stick them in my pockets before joining Ellie and Heath in kitchen.
“I need to head to the office,” I tell them both. Looking at Ellie, I grin. “I’ll call you later and we can pick up the conversation we left off.”
“Sure.”
Wrapping my arm around her narrow waist and pulling her towards me over the start of her faux objection, I kiss her loudly and with as much force as I think is legal square on the lips.
“Thanks for last night,” I wink.
“Ford!”
“Oh, I can’t even …” Heath nearly squeals.
When I release her, she stands breathless, a little wobbly on her feet, as I head to the door. “I’ll call you this afternoon, Ellie.”
“Hey!” Heath calls after me. “You forgot mine.”
Nineteen
Ellie
“I’m a little perturbed,” Heath says, his eyes still on the door. He straightens his yellow polo shirt.
“I can’t wait to hear this,” I sigh.
“I feel … cheated.”
I look at him blankly.
“Like you’ve been holding out on me,” he adds.
With a roll of my eyes, I head to the coffee pot. As expected, Heath follows on my heels.
“Friends don’t not tell friends about hot guys, Ellie. You know this.”
“You’re right. They don’t,” I say, looking at him. “But we aren’t friends anymore.”
He grins. “Does this mean I can make a play at your lover?”
“How hard would it have been for you to pretend to be going on a date with me?” I ask, ignoring his jab at a reaction.
“Hard,” he says, making a face. “Besides, I feel like if I had done that, Mr. Landry would’ve either pummeled my handsome face, and let’s face it, I would not look good with a crooked nose. Or he would’ve kept you from the cock.”
I look at the ceiling. “Where is Violet when you need her?”
Heath plops on a barstool at the island and stretches his long, skinny legs out. I don’t look at him.
“Don’t ignore me,” he demands.
“I hate you,” I laugh.
“No, you don’t,” he says, laughing too. “Now, let’s talk about what matters.”
“Okay. I need to figure out the best things to put in the window displays. We’re looking to attract a customer that—”
“No. No, no, no,” he says. “Let’s talk about whatever I walked into today.”
“You didn’t walk into anything.”
“There were feels everywhere. I may be gay, but I’m not blind, honey.”
I rest my head against his shoulder and breathe in his overly expensive cologne. “Why do you always smell so good?”
“Because I have exquisite taste. Landry Love falls in that category, so spill it, sister.”
“He was my first love. My first … everything.”
“Like, everything-everything?”
“It was in a hayloft,” I remember. “I was scared to death. He was so easy with me, so sweet. It wasn’t some planned thing. We were just sitting there, looking at the stars and …”
Heath sighs happily. “And I’m guessing you had a mini-replay of that today?”
“Yeah,” I giggle. “Kind of. I mean, it was so much better, obviously, but you get the idea.”
“I do and I have so many questions.”
“None of which I’m about to answer, Breckenmeir.”
“Answer me this,” he says, shrugging his shoulder so I have to sit up. He looks at me out of the corner of his eye. “Are you together?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
I look at my nails and wonder when I had a manicure last.
“I’m waiting,” he needles me.
“I could easily lose myself in him.”
“Sounds like a great plan.”
Trying to put my feelings into words is a lot harder than I expect. I know exactly what I’m thinking, but how do I make that understandable to someone else?
“It’s obvious he’s smitten with you,” he notes. “And it’s just as apparent you’re in love with him.”
“In love?” I laugh. “You saw us together for five seconds.”
“I knew it in one.”
“Well, I knew I loved him the minute I saw him,” I say softly. “I just need to know that this time, if there is a ‘this time,’ it’s for real. That it’s not just some phase in his life that he can walk away from if he feels a whim.”
Heath twirls around on his behind so that he’s facing me. He studies my features.
“I need to know,” I gulp, “that the universe hasn’t paired us up to waste some time between life events again. I don’t want to be his stepping stone, Heath.”
“You want to be his landing pad.”
I shrug, not sure if that’s what I want or not. “I don’t know. I know this time around is … more.” I stand, brushing off the seat of my pants. “I’m not a kid. I have a business I’ve worked my ass off for. I have plans, dreams …”
“Dreams of him?” Heath asks simply.
It’s a question I don’t answer.
Twenty
Ford
The back porch welcomes me like an old friend. A whiskey barrel sits by the sidewalk. There are no flowers planted inside like there used to be when Mrs. Pagan was alive. There’s a green rug with WELCOME written across it and I wonder if it’s the same one that welcomed me the last time I was here.
I make my way across the concrete and to the screen door a few feet away. Sounds of a gunfight can be heard inside the little kitchen on the other side.
The steps creak with my weight, the door squeaking as I knock on the wooden frame. My eyes adjust to the light. I see Bill Pagan sitting at the round table Ellie made in shop class her junior year. It’s shoved to the wall between the refrigerator and cabinets, just like it was the last time I was here.
“Ford Landry,” he says with a nod. “Come on in.”
The kitchen looks like I’m walking back in time. Everything is exactly where it was years ago—a time capsule, almost.
If I closed my eyes, I could see Ellie’s mom, Gloria, standing at the stove. I could smell her pot roast cooking in the oven and see her homemade pie crusts rolled out on the counter to my right.
I sit at the chair next to the refrigerator. “How are you, Mr. Pagan?”
He gruffs, waving a hand through the air. “Don’t start with the ‘Mr. Pagan’ bullshit.”
“Sorry,” I grin. “How are you, Bill?”
He doesn’t answer for a moment, just stares at the television in front of him. Finally, he looks at me and answers me with a question of his own. “How are you?”
“I’m good,” I reply. “Ellie says you’re doing well.”
“Yeah, well, I don’t tell her everything.”
My brows pull together as I try to make sense of what he’s saying. Do I press for more information? Is he being facetious? I don’t know. He’s a hard man to read, and I’ve been gone a long time.
“You been traveling the world?” he asks.
“I’ve seen some of it,” I admit.
“Is it as bad as they make it out to be on the news these days?”
“Parts of it. Parts of it not.” I stretch my legs out in front of me. “I’m glad to be home though.”
He nods,
taking me in. “Ellie was pretty upset when you left.”
My heart sinks in my chest. I figured this conversation may happen, but I guess it’s going to happen sooner than later. “I apologize for that, sir. Trust me when I say it’s eaten at me all these years.”
“I bet it has.”
“I wish I would’ve handled things differently.”
“You were young and dumb. But I suspect you aren’t either one these days.”
“I’m sure as hell not young,” I laugh. “I hope I’m not dumb.”
He tips his head my way. “You’re sitting here. That tells me you aren’t too stupid.” He goes back to his television show for a while. “You know, when you first came around a long time ago, I wasn’t sold on you. You drove up in that fancy truck of yours, dressed up and talking all smooth. I didn’t figure your intentions were very good.”
“I remember that,” I chuckle. “You made things hard for a while before you really gave me a chance.”
“I only gave you a chance because of Gloria,” he admits. “She always was a sucker for a good-looking man. That’s how she got me, after all.”
We enjoy a good laugh. He grabs the remote and turns down the volume.
“I miss her,” he says softly. “Every morning I wake up and listen for her piddling around.”
My chest tightens as I watch the pain haunting his eyes. I can relate, in my own way, because that’s how I feel about Ellie. I can’t imagine how I’d feel if I was with her for decades and then lost her.
He looks at me with a sobriety that catches me off guard. “She was a good judge of character. And she liked you, Ford.”
“I liked her too, Mr. Pagan.”
He lets my address slip, his mind focused on something else. In a movement so unlike him that it makes me flinch, he reaches across the table and lays his hand on top of mine.
“You’re going to be around awhile this time?” he asks.
“That’s the plan,” I breathe, unsure as to what he’s getting at. “Why are you asking me that?”
He pulls his hand away, a resolution in his eyes. “You leaving the first time is probably the only reason I’m still around.”
“What are you talking about?”
“In a really short time,” he says, the words clearly burning, “you left Ellie. Then her mother got sick and left us both. I’m all she has now.”
The Landry Family Series: Part Two Page 11