by Alexa Davis
“You’re in for a lot of homework and practice,” I warned him. “Good luck with it.” I headed out to my truck and hid around the side before lighting up the cigarette I’d been waiting to smoke since I arrived at the shelter. I took one drag before the realization hit, exactly how awful they tasted. I put it out under my foot and climbed in the truck, where Slinky sat waiting, a lopsided grin on her furry, chocolate face.
“Time will tell, Slinky, but I think changing my heart is going to be an even bigger task than I thought.” She flicked her tongue over my cheek and placed her head on my shoulder. I watched George lift himself into his brother’s car and pick up the ninety-five-pound dog and pull him into the truck and onto his lap like he weighed nothing. Yeah, getting that man off my mind was like hanging out in a bar while trying to kick alcoholism. I didn’t think it was really going to work here, either.
George waved out the passenger window while Xavi slobbered all over his hand. They both looked so happy they glowed, Xavi especially. I scratched Slinky behind one floppy ear and she swept my cheek with another quick doggy kiss. I took her into work to meet everyone, but couldn’t get my mind off George and Xavi. I knew Tucker couldn’t keep taking time away from work, and I worried that if Xavi acted out, George might not be able to stay in control from his chair. My stomach clenched at the knowledge of what I had to do.
I dialed his number and got his voicemail, so I hung up to text him instead. I hit send on an offer to go spend some time with the two of them while they got acquainted and almost immediately received a message in return.
“Just get out here and talk to me.” As I read, I imagined the terse tone of voice he would’ve said it in and I had to smile. This was the George I remembered from before his first deployment, before he started having nightmares and decided for me that I couldn’t handle who he had become.
I juggled my phone in the palm of my hand and weighed my options. I wanted to see him. I needed to stay away from him for my sanity. But, I was beginning to believe he needed me to stay close for his.
I stepped out onto the shop floor and was met by a most serious and professional-looking Xavi, sitting next to George’s wheelchair. Every muscle in the sweet boy’s frame was twitching and alert as he watched out for his master.
“Well, don’t you two look handsome together,” I grinned as Xavi’s tail thumped against the stained concrete floor. George was beaming. If he had been softer in build or less completely masculine and badass than he was, I’d have said he was glowing with new love.
“Well, I had to get my little guy all the tools and nutrition a good service dog needs to do his job, right?” Xavi’s tail picked up speed at the sound of George’s voice, and I couldn’t help but grin back at the pair.
I walked them around the store, pushing the cart for George and filling it with wet and dry dog food, unbleached chewing strips, and treats for Xavi’s continued training. I tried not to make it obvious, but kept an eye on the stocky service dog for any signs of distraction or aggression that might have undone his adoption. His large, brown eyes remained clear and alert, and even though I had to chase a few unsupervised and oh-so-curious children off, Xavi did his best to stay on task and place himself between his wounded warrior and the world.
“George, how is Tucker doing with all the time he’s spent as your chauffer?” I asked as we rounded the last aisle and headed toward the cash register. He didn’t answer right away, so I slowed to a stop and waited while Xavi enjoyed a smelly jerky treat on the floor at his feet.
“Tucker needs to be in the office more, and I’m doing my best to get out of his way. I won’t be there much longer, and he’s trying to get me ahead of the game.”
“Well, I heard my dad sucked you back in.”
“To be fair, I was pretty damn worried this injury was going to turn me into one of those vets you see on the corner. I even found myself a good, strong piece of cardboard to write my ‘will work for beer’ sign.” I laughed out loud.
“Look. I’m glad you’re working for the old man again, okay? I’m just here because of Xavi. I thought you and Tucker could use a little help, and I don’t truly have to be here all the time. Maybe I can step in so Tucker can be gone, and you can still get around. Besides, I should keep an eye on you two for a bit anyway, make sure the honeymoon doesn’t end too soon. My boy is the real deal. I’ve gotta look out for him.”
“Wow. I really appreciate that.”
“I’m talking about Xavi.” George rubbed the back of his head and nodded as the red crept up his neck.
“Well, when you put it that way, I guess I see your meaning. I was going to cab it back to Tuck’s loft, but I’d happily accept a ride so I don’t have to test Xavi like that yet.”
I nodded and we got the goods through the checkout, surprising George even more when he found out that through the TAWSAD program, most of it was free. He helped me load the back of the Land Rover and showed me how to break down the wheelchair while Xavi and Slinky watched from the front seat.
At Tucker’s condo, Xavi and Slinky sniffed, postured, and once they were sure of her, cavorted with the little heeler mix that Tucker had adopted at the fair. George deftly let her out of her kennel and all three dogs pranced around his wheelchair as he laughed and played with them. I couldn’t take my eyes off him, freer than I’d seen him since he left me in pieces after telling me I simply wasn’t strong enough to be his.
I swallowed the bitter taste in my mouth and forced my face into a pleasant blank. Not that it mattered – he always knew exactly what I was thinking and how to use it against me. Even in that moment, he glanced up from playtime and the unrestrained joy slid from his eyes as they met mine.
“What? Why are you looking at me like that? You were just having so much fun, and now I feel like I ruined it.” I backed up against the island of Tucker’s chef’s kitchen as George locked the wheels of his chair and shakily stood up. My heart was pounding in my chest, but all he had done was stand up. I swallowed hard and tried to say something witty, but in a few short steps, he was pressed against me and I couldn’t breathe, let alone speak.
His heavy-lidded, brown eyes searched my face from inches away, and when I put my hand on his chest to stop him, I felt his heart race under my palm like the stallions he once broke on Lago Colina. Instead of pushing him away, I felt him press himself against me as he pinned me to the counter, hard and ready for me.
My knees were jelly. I trembled as he whispered his hands over the bare skin of my arms, raising gooseflesh in his wake. I shook my head to say no, but he caught my face in one hand and lowered his lips to mine. His lips brushed mine quickly once, and then he demanded more, pulling my bottom lip into his mouth and sucking hard. I opened to him and sucked on his tongue while I thought of how much I wanted to kneel and do the same to the hard bulge that ground into my hip as we made out.
He balled a handful of my hair in his fist as he kissed and nipped at my jawline and neck. I pushed his face away from me and left my arm across my chest so he would stop.
“You don’t get to do this to me, George Arlen Hargrave,” I panted as I held him inches away from my body. “If you want this, you take it all. No stopping and pretending that doing so makes you a gentleman, when all it means is that you’re a coward.” I watched his face pale in shock, and his next kiss was less possessive than it was violent.
He picked me up, and we stumbled together in a barely-controlled fall to the hardwood floor. He grunted in pain as his knees hit the floor an instant before my tailbone, and he laid me out under him. He worked his hand under my shirt while I pushed at him, fighting him off.
“Not like this. I don’t want you like this.” He grasped my breast and squeezed until my hips ground against him and a moan clawed its way out of my throat.
“Are you sure?” His voice was all gravel with need. He shoved my legs apart with his knees and held me down with his hips while he massaged my breast and kissed my neck. I wanted to hate him, to claw at h
im and force him to stop, but he was finally where I had wanted him for so long that instead, I wrapped my legs around him and pulled him in tighter until my jeans cut into me.
He made a sound of frustration and got up on his good knee, tugging his zipper and his pants down. He freed himself from his boxers and, grabbing my wrist, placed my hand over him. I clasped my fingers around the thickness of his shaft and gently stroked him while he fumbled one-handed with my jeans, muttering in irritation until I squeezed harder and began pumping my hand faster. His breath came in ragged gasps and he fell on both hands to support himself as I worked him, until he tried to jerk away, begging me to stop.
“I can’t hold on. You have to stop or you won’t get any of me.” I stopped stroking, but held tight.
“I could keep going, and you could use your mouth. You were always amazing with your mouth.”
“Oh, honey. You let go and I will drag your jeans off with my teeth and lick you till you come. I just need you to let go first. Baby, you know what we can do, but I haven’t touched anyone since you, so my control isn’t what it was.” Shocked, my grip loosened and he slipped away from me, sliding backwards on the floor until his face was over the V at the tops of my legs. I lifted my hips and he gently, carefully, slipped the fabric down over my thighs and past my knees.
Trembling, I watched his face as he devoured my lips and inner thighs with his eyes. I swallowed hard and gasped as my body was lit on fire. His tongue was wet silk inside me and my palms hit the floor as I tried to keep myself from falling through it, washed away on the waves of pleasure that threatened to drown me. I felt the fringe of the Moroccan rug under the fingers of one hand and desperately gripped it as his fingers danced over my tender, throbbing skin. Those rough, callused fingers replaced his tongue and pushed over the perfect spot deep inside me as he sucked and licked my swollen nub.
In the distance, I could hear choked cries, and as I crested the last wave of pleasure that plummeted me into the abyss, I realized the screams were coming from me. I came hard and fast, and he drove me to another peak with his hand and tongue almost instantly. The orgasms smashed into me one after another until I was weak and shaking violently. I was a heavy puddle of trembling, whimpering jelly on the floor, too sated to even open my eyes.
I heard a satisfied masculine chuckle and George lay next to me on the floor, warming my cool skin with his nearness. He slid his arm under my head, and I tried to pull my hair up so he wasn’t pulling it as he nuzzled my neck.
“I still got it.”
“Unngh”
“Wow. I didn’t know I was that good,” he gloated while I tried to make my mouth form an intelligible sentence.
“I did,” I finally croaked. “You think I wanted you back for your sparkling personality?” He rolled me and hugged me tight against him with his lips pressed against my forehead.
“I can’t imagine you wanting me back, at all. I thought I’d burned that bridge a long time ago.”
“Truthfully, I don’t want you back.” He stiffened and I pressed against him so he couldn’t pull away. “I just want you to be okay. Happy even, if you’ll let yourself. I love you, but I can’t force you to love me back.”
“I never said I didn’t love you.”
“You didn’t have to, George, honey. Your actions spoke plenty.” I turned into his chest and tilted my head to kiss his jaw. “Oh, God, how I love you. Your smell, how gentle you are, and then how strong. I love your smile, your moods, and your determination. I love the way you move inside me and I can’t imagine being with another man and feeling this good. I love you so much, that even though it’s killing me to be close to you, I’m going to help you finish training Xavi and stand on your own two feet…in a manner of speaking.” He snorted at the dig, but wrapped his arms around me and held on tight.
We lay on the floor until a concerned Xavi jumped off the sofa and began sniffing around us. He pressed his cold nose against my bare ass, and I jumped and squealed. As I rolled away from George, my joints complained and I carefully sat upright and slid my pants up over my butt before climbing to my feet.
George reached out a hand and I helped him to his feet, too, a little disappointed that he’d also reassembled his clothing. I reached out and tugged at his zipper with a pout.
“I would have enjoyed finishing what we started, one last time,” I sighed. He reached out and cupped the heat between my legs.
“I think I owe you that. But on a bed, naked, not on a cold-ass floor where my big brother could walk in on us and see how hot you are without your clothes on. None of his dang business.”
He pulled me in close to kiss me, and the taste of me on his lips made me cling tighter, exploring his mouth with my tongue. He pushed against me, forcing me to take one step back, then another, never taking his mouth off me. When I came up for air, he went down, tilting my head back and running his tongue down my throat.
With my head tipped back, I could see he was steering us more or less toward a bedroom behind us. I adjusted the trajectory and tipped my face back up to his. His lips slid across mine just as my shoulder hit the doorjamb on the way through.
“Ow. Okay, let’s just get in there safely and go from there.”
“Injuring you certainly won’t help my lover-status.” He rubbed my back and chuckled. I let him put his arm around my shoulder so I could support his left leg the rest of the way. At the bed, he half-slid, half-fell back with his legs hanging over the edge. I stood between his knees and leaned over him.
“Glad you didn’t do your pants up all the way. Makes this easier.” I hitched his pants down and tugged at them until they were around his ankles. “Shit. You’re still wearing shoes.”
“The footrests on the chair get cold.”
“I was planning on being sexier than this.” I popped my head up over the edge of the bed and grimaced at him. He belly laughed while I tugged his cowboy boots off and then did the same with his jeans, flinging them up onto his chest and face. He laughed louder and sat up.
“I thought you were trying to be sexy.” He pulled me up close between his legs and I stared down at him. His eyes sparkled and his dimples made me smile back at him.
“You started laughing, so I figured I’d roll with it.” I smirked down into his face and leaned in for a kiss. “Damn, we were good at this.”
“Until I went to Afghanistan, we were good at just about everything, darlin,” he replied. “Right up ‘til I got so messed up in the head I didn’t know what was home and what was war.”
“And, it never occurred to you that home was exactly what I was supposed to be?” He let me lift his shirt and pull it over his head. I tossed it to the floor and ran my fingers over his broad shoulders, across the little bunched up bits of scar tissue that dotted his upper chest and arms.
“I was afraid I would hurt you. I still am.” He looked away from me, but I slid my fingers under his chin and tilted his head back up so I could see his eyes. I nodded and kissed him softly.
I stared into those brown eyes as I slowly dropped to my knees. Only then did I lower my gaze to his body, the additional scars lower on his torso, down to his thighs and the thatch of hair on which nestled his throbbing, swollen manhood. I wrapped my hand around the shaft of him and stroked, gazing back into his eyes.
“Do you want to watch, or do you want to lie down?”
“I want us both on the bed, so I can do both. But first, I want to watch you take off all those damn clothes.”
I replaced my hand with his, so I could watch him stroke himself while I stripped for him. I was wetter with every moment, but took my time. I stood just out of reach and slid out of my skinny jeans, leaving my panties on. I slipped my tank top off over my head and slowly undid my bra, reveling in the increased pace of his masturbation when my erect nipples came into view. I dropped the bra to the floor and turned away from him, slowly baring my ass, then bending all the way over to slide my damp, pink panties down my legs to my ankles.
I paused, feeling his eyes on the crease between my legs. I glanced over my shoulder and he was staring, licking his lips as he stared at the ones between my thighs. With my panties puddled around my ankles, I reached up between my legs and slid my finger down the center of my sex, parting it to show him the pearly liquid that pooled there. His breathing went rough as I finally stepped out of the fabric and turned to face him.
“My God, you are so beautiful,” he rasped. He’d stopped fondling himself and was focused completely on me. The effect was heady, and I climbed up on the bed as much for the support as to straddle him.
“Move up. I want to use my mouth, and I want you to watch me.” He slid up and bolstered himself with extra pillows under his head so he was almost sitting up. He slid fly-away hair to the side so nothing obstructed his view of my mouth and I began to kiss and lick up and down his shaft. I made circles around the head and abruptly slid my mouth over his and all the way down, forcing him into my throat, so that my mouth touched his stomach.
“Fuck. Oh Fuck. Oh, God. Don’t stop,” he panted, and I obeyed. I started a slow rhythm sliding him halfway into my mouth, then would push him all the way in. I fought the panic every time I felt him block my airway and held myself there until I had no choice but come up for air. He started to thrust in time to my movement, and his hand fisted behind my head, pushing me harder onto him. We’d played the game many times before, and I trusted him to know the rules.
He pushed me down hard and held me there until I saw spots behind my eyelids. I tapped his thigh and he released me. I held him in my hand and stroked while I caught my breath, then went back for more. He held me down again, and let me go when I tapped out. That time, I didn’t back off completely, just took a deep breath through my nose and let him push my head down again. Soon, I was barely given time to breathe between deep thrusts, until I was on the verge of passing out. George knew my limit and before I wanted to stop, he let go of my hair and touched my cheek.
“I can keep going.” My voice was croaky and strained from the beating my throat had taken.