Drift

by Anna Brooks

  He groans and bucks his hips, forcing me to fall forward again. My hands slam on the floor on either side of his head, our lips barely an inch apart. I lower my head and press my lips to his, my entire body warming with the light touch. One of his arms wraps around my back, and he grabs my hair with the other. I kiss him again. And again.

  Then he takes over. He thrusts his tongue into my mouth, desire rampant as we’re still turned on from our earlier kiss. We both groan, mine quiet but his long and deep, telling me how much he wants this. He slides his hand down to cup my butt and moves me. He pushes himself against me, and I press down onto him, molding our bodies together.

  He lets go of my head and hoists me up to my feet. Before I can say anything, he’s back on me. His strong arms band around me, and he lifts me up and carries me to my bedroom. I squeal when he tosses me on the bed.

  “What do you want, Billie?”

  “I don’t…” I shake my head. “I don’t know. You.” God, I want him. I want him to do whatever he wants. “I just want you, but I…”

  “No buts, baby. Just me and you. Whatever you want to happen can happen. Whatever you don’t want to won’t. I might be bigger. I might be stronger. But you’re the one with all the power here.”

  Why do I want to cry right now? This isn’t supposed to happen… I don’t want it to happen because I don’t know how to deal with it. I’ve never had this… never had someone care enough about me to want to look after me in all the ways there are.

  “It’s just…”

  “Are you a virgin, honey?”

  I can’t tell him the truth. He can’t know the dirty details and the disgusting truth that is my past. Biting my lip, I barely shake my head.

  He lowers his body over mine. “I want to take care of you in all the ways a man looks after his woman. Don’t know much, honey, but I can tell you’ve had enough bumpy to last a lifetime. Trust that I’m gonna get you through the rest of this ride on a smooth track. Let me be the one to show you it’s safe to throw your hands up in the air because I’ve got you, and no way in this world would I ever let you fall.” The conviction in his voice is enough to make me trust him.

  Being with him, just being in the same room with him blocks so much pain out. Actually being with him… I bet it’ll make everything better. “Okay.”

  When he rocks into me, my lips fall open, and he kisses me. Soft and slow. When he tries to sit up, I tighten myself around him. I don’t want him to go; I want him close… even closer than he is right now. “You want more of this?” His hardness grinds into my throbbing center, and I can’t fight the weight of my lids lowering.

  “Yes.”

  “Me too, but I can make it better. You’ve gotta let me go for a second, though.”

  I nod, my eyes popping back open.

  He laughs and pries my legs from behind his back. I sit up on my elbows and watch as he pulls my pants off. He runs a knuckle over my damp underwear, back and forth before finding my face through his heavy lashes. “So wet.” He slides them off and spreads my legs apart. I feel vulnerable like this. Really horny, but vulnerable. “Beautiful,” he says to himself. “I really, really wanna put my mouth here.” He slides a finger between my folds and then into me.

  “Do it.” I push into his hand.

  He lowers his head and sucks my clit into his mouth and groans, the vibrations adding to the sensation already overpowering me.

  “Oh Lord.”

  Another finger is added, and he pumps in and out of me. “I was right. Better than honey.” He spreads me open and fucks me with his tongue. My fingers wring his hair, and I pull him against me harder.

  My Lord, I’ve never… My core tightens when he rubs his fingers against the secret spot inside me and tremors make my thighs shake.

  “Right there, huh?” He doubles the effort and lifts his head from between my legs. “You gonna come for me?”

  “Yessss.” I had no flippin’ idea it could ever be like this. So good.

  “Good, baby. Give it to me.”

  He buries his face and does something with his tongue that I can’t see. “Carter, oh my…” The vibration in my thighs zings through my entire body as an orgasm rips through me. I fall back, and my head bounces against the mattress.

  He continues lapping at me with his tongue until I push his head away, the overwhelming sensation too much. He kisses up my thigh and then pushes my knees together before he sits next to me. I smile, and he leans down, gently kissing me. I lick my lips.

  “Taste how sweet you are?”

  Not exactly sure how to answer that, I simply nod.

  “Yeah, so damn sweet. I’m gonna leave now, Billie, because if I stay, all I’ll want to do is keep tasting you and making you come. Then that’ll make me just want to fuck you more than I already do and—”

  “Okay.” I want more. I want it all with him.

  “Not now. You had a shit day and—”

  “And I felt dirty, Carter. I felt gross, but you don’t make me feel that way. You make me feel beautiful and safe, and I want that with you. I want you inside me.”

  Carter

  “I want that too, but—”

  “Please.” She sits up and grabs the bottom of her shirt, then lifts it up. Her perky breasts spill out of the cups of her bra, and she reaches over for my shirt.

  I clasp my hand over her wrists. “I don’t have anything on me.”

  “Shit.” She drops her arms. “I’m not on anything.”

  As much as I want to feel her bareback, it’s too risky to just pull out. “If I run across the hall to grab some condoms, will you still have that look on your face when I get back?”

  “What look?” She gives me a shy smile, and the innocence of it makes my cock twitch.

  “You’re so damn gorgeous.” I stand and try to walk away so I can go grab protection, but I can’t move from the spot. I’m afraid if I walk away, she’ll be gone when I come back. But her waiting for me, knowing what’s gonna happen when I do get back, puts my ass in gear. “I’m gonna fuck you so good, honey.”

  “Hurry.”

  I back out of her room, and once I can’t see her anymore, I rush to my apartment, boner and all. I think it only takes like thirty seconds, but it feels like way longer than that before I make it back to her. I grab a packet out of the box, then drop it to the floor. Biting the corner of the wrapper, I reach behind me and take my shirt off, then shuck the rest of my clothes.

  With her eyes hot and heavy, she watches as I roll the condom down my cock. Inviting me in, she opens her legs farther, and I waste no time. Settling between her thighs, I rub the tip of my dick against her and slide in just a little bit. “Holy fuck,” I pant.

  “More.”

  I give her what she asks, and once I’m all the way in, my forehead collides with her collarbone. She squirms beneath me, and I push up on my elbows, then grab each of her perfect tits in my hands. “I’ll give it to you any way you want it whenever you ask, but right now, it’s gonna be hard.” The need I feel to come with her is insane.

  “Okay.”

  “And it’s gonna be fast.”

  “Okay.”

  “Hold on, baby.”

  She wraps her arms around me, and I let loose. I fuck her hard. Deep. She holds tight and crosses her legs behind my back while I pound into her. “Oh, God.”

  “Not yet.”

  “Carter.”

  “Not that fast. Christ, woman. Not yet.”

  Her nails dig into my shoulders, and the pain shoots straight to my balls. “I’m so close.”

  “Hold on. Wait for me.”

  A mewl rolls up through her throat, and she arches her back.

  “Fuck, you don’t even know how beautiful you are.” I drop my head and suck on her nipples, trying to make it last longer. Knowing this first time will never happen again, I want it to never end. And when she clamps down around me, I’ll be a goner.

  “Carter…”

  The pressure in my balls i
ncreases every time they slap against her ass, and I bring my hands around, pulling her to me. “You ready?”

  “God, yes.”

  “Fuck, yeah. Come with me, honey. Come all over me and take me with you.” My teeth find her neck when she tosses her head back and screams my name. The walls of her unbelievably tight pussy squeeze me, and I explode inside her like I knew I would.

  It takes a minute for me to see straight again, and when I do, I roll us over so I’m on my back.

  She rests her head on my chest, and I hold her, never wanting to let go.

  * * *

  After I took a trip to the bathroom, I crawled right back in her bed. She dozed off, but I can’t seem to catch any sleep. Too many thoughts crawl around my head like a spider’s egg just hatched. Earlier, she asked why I don’t surf anymore, and I don’t want to tell her. I don’t want her to know how badly I fucked up in the past.

  How, as a man, I failed the one person who was supposed to count on me the most.

  It doesn’t matter that it was physically impossible for me to save her.

  The fact that I was right fuckin’ there, and she still…

  I rub the scar on my calf, phantom pain emerging with a touch. The real pain happens with overuse. I try not to think about Zoe too much right now. I’d be pissed if I knew Billie was thinking about another man with me right beside her. I’m not gonna do that to her. I can fuck with my own head when I’m alone.

  So I focus on the future in my arms. Gently prying myself away, I grab my phone and walk to the living room, making sure to close the door behind me.

  “Everything okay?” Q asks in greeting.

  “Yeah, man, sorry. I know it’s late.”

  He yawns. “All good. What’s up?”

  “Need you to get some dirt on someone for me.”

  “Who?”

  “His name is Paxton Ray. He’s a—”

  “Celebrity chef who fucks around with married women who also doesn’t understand what the word stop means. You need pictures? I’ve already got ’em.”

  Nothing good comes from Q already knowing about someone. “Fuck, do I want to know why you have that information?”

  “You should probably talk to Erik.”

  “What? Why?”

  “He’s flagged.”

  I huff out a curse. When someone at Royal has a person they want to deal with—be it family, an old friend, lover, enemy, or damn school teacher—they get flagged. And if Erik flagged him, it might mean I won’t be able to get revenge the way I need to. Should have kicked his ass earlier tonight before I knew this. I’m going to ruin his career, no doubt, but I wanted to get at least a few blows to his face, too.

  “What’s this guy mean to you?”

  I spike my hand through my hair and look out the window into the dark sky. “He put his hands on my girl. I already know he’s a piece of shit, but before I teach him a lesson…”

  “Yeah, got it.” I don’t get any shit from him about having a girl, which is total Q. He notices everything and says nothing because anything he wants to know he can find on a computer. “I have photos if you need ’em, but I suspect just you showing up with the knowledge will be more than enough.”

  “I think you suspect right.”

  Chapter 7

  Billie

  “I’m sorry, ladies and gentlemen. We have another bus en route, but it may take up to three hours for it to arrive.” Great, now I’m going to be late for my date with Carter.

  This morning, he called me and told me he’s taking me out to dinner and to wear a pretty dress.

  He’s been gone for work, and I haven’t seen him for like five days, and it sucks. We’ve texted and talked on the phone a lot, but in the short time I had him, I’ve missed him not being close.

  I spent three days straight filling out applications at every restaurant around here, but I haven’t heard back from any of them.

  After his call this morning, I got bored after job searching for a couple of hours and went shopping instead. Not the smartest thing, but I figure it won’t make that much of a difference if I gave up just a little bit of time. I went to a secondhand store and found a dress that was on clearance, but it’s fabulous. Pink and skintight, its lines are classic and not too revealing.

  I grab my phone and dial Carter to let him know. “Hey, honey.”

  “Hi. So, uh. I’m going to be late tonight. Heck, I might not get home at all.”

  “Why not?”

  I inhale deeply, the salt from the ocean tickling my nostrils.

  “I’m kind of stranded.” I could take a cab, but that would cost too much money. And if we reschedule like I hope we will, I’ll still need the cash. God, I shouldn’t have bought a new dress. This would have never happened.

  “What are you talking about, baby?”

  “The bus I was on kind of, um, got in an accident. They’re sending another one, but it might take a couple of hours. I’m really sorry.” He doesn’t say a peep, and I’m really worried he’s mad at me. “Carter?”

  “What did you just say?”

  I plop down on a bench and angle my body to block the sun from my eyes. “That I might be late.”

  “After that.”

  “I’m sorry?” I laugh, thinking he’s joking around.

  He practically growls, “No. Before you said I’m sorry, what did you say?”

  “They might take a couple of hours to send a new bus.”

  He grumbles something incoherent. “Why the fuck are you on a bus?”

  “Because I needed to go to the store.”

  “Why did you take a bus to the store?”

  “Because I don’t have a car. What do you want me to say?”

  The sound of an engine turning over drowns him out.

  “What?”

  “Where are you?”

  “Fairview Drive at the beach.”

  He inhales sharply. “I’ll be there in about twenty.”

  “I’ll be here.” He hangs up, and I kick my shoes off and put them in my bag. The sand tickles my toes, and I dig them in farther, then close my eyes and angle my head up, enjoying the sun on my face. I walk to the shoreline and jump back when a wave crashes up.

  I stroll down the beach toward the end where there are fewer people and hope I’ll be able to find him when he parks. Kids run by me laughing as they jump in the water, and I can’t help but smile at them. I’ve never thought about having kids myself, mostly because I never thought I’d find a man I wanted to have a family with.

  “Billie,” Carter calls my name, and I turn around, using my hand to shield the sun. “Let’s go.”

  I start heading in his direction, and the closer I get, the more I notice how tightly he’s wound up. What the heck is up with that? “Are you okay?”

  He leans over and reaches for me, keeping his feet off the sand. “Hurry up. Let’s go.”

  I take a step back and shake my head. “What’s wrong? You’re freaking me out.”

  His chest is raising and lowering so fast he looks like he just ran a marathon. “Please, just come with me.” He drops his arm as he pleads with me.

  “Why won’t you come over here?”

  “I don’t wanna be here. I don’t like beaches and water and anything that has to do with them.”

  “I thought you said that Jaws place was your favorite place in the world.” Carter’s been very tight-lipped about his past. I don’t think he’s hiding something from me; I think he’s holding it in. There’s a huge difference between the two.

  He pinches the bridge of his nose. “I don’t know why I said that. You make me drop my guard, and I say things I shouldn’t. Please, baby. Just come to me.”

  I don’t like this side of him. It hurts me to see him hurting, so I go to him. He practically yanks me into his arms and holds me super tight. His lips find the top of my head, and he just holds me for a minute. “I missed you.”

  “I missed you, too.”

  Then he leads me to his Je
ep, and as soon as we’re driving away, he reaches over and holds my hand. “I had no idea you didn’t have a car. You’re not taking the bus anymore.”

  Okay, that was a quick change of subject. “I kind of have to.”

  “Not anymore.”

  “Carter, I don’t have a car.”

  He glances over at me and smirks. “Good thing I have two cars.”

  “Excuse me?”

  “I have the Jeep and two cars. You can drive one of mine; you’re not taking the bus anymore. Too dangerous.”

  “I’ve ridden the bus almost every day for three years and been just fine.”

  The smirk falls. “The first night, outside the restaurant, were you leaving for the bus?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Dammit. Why didn’t you say something? I thought you were waiting for someone, not to get on public transportation with all the nutjobs.”

  “I was fine.”

  “Now you’ll be better than fine. Well… we’ll see how you do actually driving in this crazy traffic.”

  He’s lost his mind. I’m not driving one of his cars, so I just change the subject. “How was work?”

  “Same thing I told you yesterday, and the day before that, and the day before that. Monotonous. But I’m damn glad to be home.”

  I smile as I tilt my head back, letting the wind blow my hair and the sun warm my face. “I’m glad you’re home, too.”

  The rest of the drive is fast, and he tries to sneak into my place when we get there, but I push him out. “I need to change.”

  “I can help you.”

  Tempting, so tempting. But I want more than just sex with him. As fantastic as it is, I need to know he wants more than that, too. “I just need a half hour.”

  “Fine.” He pushes open my door and kisses me before tapping my butt. “I’ll be back.”

  I rush to the bathroom and lean against the counter. My cheeks are pink, and my eyes are clearer than they have ever been. As I stare at myself longer, I somber, feeling guilty for enjoying myself when I know my mom isn’t. If anything, things probably got worse after I left, but I have to remind myself she wanted this for me.