Painted by the Sun

by Elizabeth Grayson

  Maybe he could convince Emmet to take another turn around the block. Maybe he should take Shea something—some gift to show her how he felt. He remembered a shop on Fifteenth Street that had had lovely fans in the—

  "You need help getting out of the carriage, Pa?" Rand asked, from beside him, all concern and solicitation.

  "No, son, I'm fine," Cam mumbled and blotted his upper lip with the back of his hand. "Just give me a minute."

  Knowing he had no choice, Cam eased himself out of the carriage. He paused at the foot of the stairs and waited for Emmet to drive away.

  The three of them sat watching him expectantly instead.

  "You can go now," Cam urged them. He figured he'd pace a little before he went up to see Shea, and he didn't particularly want an audience.

  "I thought we'd stay long enough be sure Shea doesn't throw you out," Emmet offered, grinning. Lily nudged him with her elbow, and Rand made it worse by snickering.

  "I'll be fine," Cam snapped and started up the steps.

  There seemed to be an inordinately large number of steps this morning. By the time he reached the top he was wobbly and running with sweat—and so nervous his hands were shaking.

  This shouldn't be so difficult. What Shea wanted was what he longed to give her—a part of his life, a place in his family. The whole of his heart. He'd been drawn to her ever since he'd carted her off to jail that day in Breckenridge, and had been falling a little more in love with her every day since.

  He nodded, swallowed, took a breath. He lifted his hat and smoothed down his hair. He reached for the doorknob and pushed, but for some reason the door didn't open. He turned the knob and nudged the panel with his shoulder. It refused to budge.

  "Shea?" he called out softly and rattled the latch. "Shea?"

  It was ten thirty on Saturday morning, Shea's busiest day. So why was the place locked up tight?

  "Please, Shea, open the door." Dread crept in to displace his nervousness. "I need to talk to you. I need to talk to you now."

  He pressed his ear to the door. There wasn't so much as a whisper of movement on the other side. She wasn't being stubborn; she wasn't there.

  He half-stepped down the stairs.

  "What's the matter?" Lily wanted to know.

  Cam answered with a shake of his head before he pushed his way into Mrs. Franklin's millinery shop. "Where is she?"

  "Who?" Agnes Franklin glanced up from the bow she was stitching onto a bright green hat.

  "You know who I'm asking about."

  Her eyebrows lifted. "You mean she didn't tell you?"

  "Tell me what?"

  "That she was leaving."

  Cam had to grab the edge of the counter to steady himself. "Leaving?"

  "She came downstairs yesterday, all red-nosed and tear-spotty, and said she and Ty were moving on." The disapproving look she sent him said she knew this was all his fault.

  "Where—where did they go, Mrs. Franklin?"

  Agnes Franklin stabbed her needle into the hat as if she wished it were his hide. "I don't rightly know," she sniffed. "Though I'd have thought a respectable man like you would have done the proper thing and married her. Staying up there nights without benefit of clergy, expecting her to tend you when you were hurt..."

  Heat seeped up Cam's jaw. "I'm trying to find her so I can remedy that."

  Mrs. Franklin paused with her needle in midair. "Oh?"

  Cam hadn't meant to discuss his plans with anyone outside his family, but there didn't seem to be much help for it. "I mean to ask Shea to marry me. So if you could see your way clear to telling me where she went..."

  "Well, then," Mrs. Franklin said with the air of a benevolent matchmaker. "They left for the depot an hour ago."

  Cameron barely took time to mutter his thanks. As he clambered into the back of the carriage, he told Emmet where they were headed.

  "The railroad station?" Lily gasped, as Emmet slapped the reins on the horse's backs. "Good grief, Cammie, what did you say to her?"

  "It's the hundred things I didn't say."

  He hadn't told her how she settled him and soothed him and made him feel as if he'd found something for himself in all of this. He hadn't told her how important it was for her to be part of his life, part of his family. He hadn't told her how he wanted to take care of her and give her children to make up for the son she'd given away. But then he hadn't been in a position to court a wife until yesterday.

  Cam clung to the back of the front seat as Emmet did his best to maneuver through the crowded streets. But it was Saturday morning. The farmers and the ranchers had come to town and traffic was slow. The hoot of a train from over near the river made all of them jump.

  After ten agonizing minutes, Emmet let him out right in front of the depot. With his heart hammering in his ears, Cam rushed into the station's waiting room.

  The benches were full. There were miners in their flashy new duds and drummers with samples cases and several young matrons tending flocks of children. The gamblers had congregated in one corner to smoke and a few cowboys sat with their saddles at their feet, probably headed north to look for work.

  There was no sign of a lady photographer.

  What if he'd missed her? he wondered, concern crowding up his throat. What if she was already gone?

  Desperation prodded Cam through the wide double doors and out onto the open platform. More passengers clustered out here, some pacing, some gathering up their children or their luggage, some pointing to the train steaming toward the station from the south.

  Fresh panic clutched him, then he spotted Shea and Ty down at the end of the platform.

  Relief dropped through Cam like cool rain. He went breathless and giddy. As long as Shea was still here, as long as he could talk to her, he thought he could find a way to make this right between them.

  Just then the train from Pueblo came chugging and clanging into the station. Steam hissed and brakes squealed.

  As the conductor swung down to the platform, Shea snapped to attention and took two tickets from her reticule.

  "Den-ver. Den-n-n-ver station," the trainman bawled. "Five minute layover in Den-ver."

  That didn't give Cam much time. He hadn't taken more than two steps toward Shea and Ty when the doors to the waiting room flapped open and he was engulfed in a gush of jostling passengers. Caught like a bug in sap, Cam watched helplessly as Shea hefted her valise, bent to say something to Ty, then turned toward where the conductor was beginning to hand people onto the train.

  Ty lifted a big, square box that must have had Rufus inside and dragged along behind her. He was complaining, Cam thought by the set of his chin, or maybe arguing.

  Whatever he was saying, Shea stopped, turned to him again, then cupped her palm to his cheek. She listened to him for a moment. A crease came between her eyebrows. She glanced toward the center of town, then sighed and nodded slowly.

  At that moment, Cam managed to break free of the clot of passengers and called to her. "Shea, wait!"

  She turned toward him in a rustle of skirts. When she saw who it was, she straightened from her heels to her hat.

  Beside her, Ty gave Cam a grin so wide he wasn't sure how all of it fit on his face.

  "What are you doing here?" she asked as he approached, tipping her chin like a queen addressing rabble.

  As he drew closer he saw she had that soft, smudged look about her that women got when they'd been crying, and, selfish as he knew it was, Cam let it encourage him.

  "I thought we ought to talk before you hightail it out of—"

  The conductor cut him off. " 'Board! All aboard for Cheyenne!"

  Shea glanced down the platform.

  Cam stepped in close. "I don't think you should leave Denver."

  She turned back to him, her eyes widening. "You don't?"

  "You have people here who care about you." That wasn't what he'd intended to say. It wasn't very personal—or romantic. "I don't want you to go," he amended.

  "Tell me
, Cam, why is that? Just yesterday you wouldn't let me go with you when you went to talk to Lily. You told me what was between you wasn't my business. That I had no part in your life. Now you're here telling me not to go, that you care about me. If you care, why did you push me away?"

  He took her hand, needing to hold her here until he'd found the words that would convince her to stay. "Shea, please, I—"

  Just then Lily and Emmet and Rand burst out the doors of the station and bustled toward them.

  The moment Shea caught sight of them, her gaze widened, softened. It lingered on Rand the way it always did, the way it probably always would. It brushed over him with affection and longing and more than a modicum of pride.

  Then all at once Cam realized that by packing up and deciding to leave, Shea had made her intentions about claiming Rand clear. She was giving him up, giving him up all over again. Her sacrifice shook him.

  "So have you convinced her to stay in Denver?" Lily asked breathlessly as they reached where Shea and Cam and Ty were standing.

  "They're going to be here for the wedding, aren't they?" Rand asked.

  "Wedding?" Shea echoed, flashing a startled look in Cam's direction. "What wedding is that?"

  "Aunt Lily and Emmet are getting married," Rand announced, more than delighted by the prospect of gaining Emmet as his second father.

  With a little shout of joy, Shea threw her arms around Lily, and Cam heard the soft waver in Shea's voice as she hugged his sister. "Oh, Lily! I'm so glad you and Emmet finally realized how much you love each other!"

  "This would never have happened if it weren't for you," Lily whispered, hugging Shea back.

  Before Shea could so much as acknowledge the comment or offer Emmet congratulations, the conductor shouted again. "All aboard for Cheyenne. All aboard for Cheyenne, Wyoming."

  Lily looked up at Cam with some alarm. "Has she agreed to stay?"

  "Not yet—"

  Lily all but shoved Shea in Cam's direction. "Then for god sakes, Cammie! Do something!"

  Cam clamped his hand around Shea's wrist. "I fully intend to!"

  He hauled her off down the platform away from where passengers were boarding, away from where Lily, Emmet, and the boys stood watching.

  Cam stared down at her, the heat of longing budding in his chest. "As I was saying when the whole of the damn world burst in on us," he began again. "I'm sorry about what happened yesterday. When things overwhelm me, sometimes I crawl inside myself. I didn't shut you out because I didn't trust you. I didn't push you away to hurt you. I don't want you leaving Denver because you think I don't care about you."

  "That was a very lovely apology, Cam," she said, and her chin came up. "And I'm glad you don't mind me living here, because I'd already made up my mind to stay."

  "You what?" Cam dropped his hold on her wrist. "Then what the devil are we doing at the train station?"

  He saw the color come up in her cheeks. "Staying was a fairly recent decision."

  "How recent?" he demanded.

  "I made it five minutes ago."

  "What was it that changed your mind?"

  "Ty convinced me," she answered. "He's barely given me a moment's peace since last night when he decided he wanted to stay. He got me thinking about how well the studio is doing and the friends I've made, and the people who are here that care about me. And I'm just plain tired of wandering, of running away."

  Shea wasn't staying because of him. Cam couldn't help the dark seep of disappointment. She'd stayed for her friends and her business and her boy.

  Cam saw quite suddenly that even if she stayed, he could lose her. She could have her work and a life separate from his right here in Denver, if that's what she wanted.

  And he simply couldn't bear that. He wouldn't be able to bear having her so close without being able to see her and talk to her and touch her. Without her being his.

  Cam caught her face between his hands and looked into her eyes. He could see all the way down to the core of who she was. He could see past her pride and her determination, to all her yearning and vulnerability, all her tenderness and humanity. And he knew he had to hang onto her forever.

  "Oh, Shea," he breathed. "I want you to stay in Denver, because of me. I want you to stay because I please you, because I can make you happy. I want you to stay because I love you and I need you. I want you to stay because you love me, too."

  He saw tears simmer in her eyes. "Oh, Cam," she breathed.

  "For the first time in my life I've found someone who feels like part of me. Someone I can laugh with and trust, someone who trusts and wants me, too. That person is you, Shea, and now that I've found you, I'd be so happy and proud if you'd agree to be my wife.

  "I want to be with you for the rest of my days. I want you to be part of my life. I want to make a home and a family for us together. Please, Shea, say you'll marry me."

  A dozen yards away the train huffed and grumbled, stoking up its head of steam. The conductor bawled his last call for Cheyenne.

  Ty came pelting toward them down the platform. "We going to cash in those tickets or what?" he yelled at Shea.

  Shea looked down at Ty and up at Cam. He read the question in her eyes: would he take Ty as his son if she married him?

  "Of course," he said and drew Ty closer.

  She beamed down at her boy for a moment before she gave him her answer. "Not only are we cashing in the tickets, but Cam's also asked me to marry him. What do you think?"

  Ty chewed his lip. "I suppose it depends on how you're gonna answer him."

  "I think I'm going to tell him yes, is that all right?"

  Ty threw his arms around both of them. "Well it's about damn time!"

  Cam bent his head and kissed Shea right there on the platform. Right there on the platform while the train pulled out for Cheyenne, while Lily and Emmet and the boys clapped and hooted their approval. He kissed her with a good deal more enthusiasm than a sane man should five days after he'd been shot. Cam was woozy and gone at the knees by the time they were done—but he was grinning.

  "Cammie," Lily said, stepping up close beside him. "You know it's only right and proper to seal Shea's promise with a betrothal ring."

  Cam stared at his sister shaking his head. "But I don't have—You know there wasn't time—"

  "I thought you might like to give her this." Lily opened her palm and in the hollow lay a small gold circlet of garnets, his mother's betrothal ring.

  "Oh, Lily, are you sure?" he breathed. "You've worn that ring on a ribbon around your neck ever since Mother died."

  Lily smiled softly and there was the shimmer of tears in her eyes. "I want Shea to have it. I think Mother would want her to have it, too," she insisted softly, "so that Shea will never doubt she's one of us."

  Cam accepted Lily's offering and clasped the circlet tight in his palm. He felt the warmth, felt the connection to his mother and his sister through the gold and gems. He could see in Shea's eyes how much that connection meant to her.

  Bending over her, he eased the ring onto Shea's finger and wasn't the least surprised that the circlet fit. "This is even more than a symbol of my love for you," he whispered. "It makes you one of us in every way."

  Shea looked up at him, her face alight. "I love you, Cam," she whispered, then turned slowly to the others. "And all of you."

  Epilogue

  Cameron Gallimore smiled to himself as he watched Shea and his new son—and his old son—preparing to take what would be their wedding photograph.

  "Can you see everyone in the focusing glass?" Shea asked Ty from where she was hovering just outside of the dark-cloth. This was the first photograph Ty had taken completely on his own, and Shea was nervous.

  "I can see everyone but you."

  "And are they all in focus?"

  "Everyone but you."

  "Shall I take just one quick look?"

  "No, Ma. It's fine."

  Cam saw Shea's features soften. He knew her heart melted every time her boy called h
er that. So did Ty.

  "It's the knob on the side of the lens you need to turn to bring everything into focus," she persisted.

  "I know."

  Rand stood off to one side carefully balancing the loaded plate holder in both hands. "Don't you think you should take your place, Shea?" he suggested, beaming at her. "If it takes much longer to get everyone settled, won't this plate be too dry for us to use?"

  Shea nodded reluctantly. "I'll just go take my place then."

  "Finally," Cam heard Ty mutter.

  Shea came up the steps of the farmhouse and eased between Lily and him. Cam slid his hand around her waist and snugged her against him. He liked the way she felt, soft and solid and so inviting. It was an invitation he was very much looking forward to accepting once their guests went home.

  He and Shea and Lily and Emmet had been married right here on the veranda not two hours before. The sky had been bright, cobalt blue, and the spring sun had shone warm on them to bless the ceremony. Their guests were still off eating and drinking and dancing in the yard, but Shea had been determined to take their wedding photographs before they lost the light.

  "You ready?" Rand called out.

  "That's good right there," Ty said, emerging from beneath the dark-cloth.

  Rand fitted the plate holder into the camera and pulled the slide. "Stay really still, now," Ty told them.

  "With this light that exposure should be to a count of fifteen," Shea reminded him.

  "You told me twice already." With a flourish Ty removed the lens cap and began to count.

  From the corner of his eye Cam noticed that in posing for the photograph Lily had turned full-face to the camera, and he couldn't help how proud he was of her for being able to do that.

  She'd be living in town after today, Emmet and Rand and her. She'd be taking on the duties of a doctor's wife, overseeing his appointments and helping with patients. She'd finally stopped hiding herself away. She'd emerged into the world secure in Emmet's love and Shea's fierce protectiveness and the friendships Lily herself had forged.