Standard Hollywood Depravity--A Ray Electromatic Mystery
Page 12
I tapped the side of my head that didn’t have a phone receiver pressed against it. My metal finger made a sound against my metal head like an abandoned engagement ring falling into a porcelain basin in a cheap hotel.
“You’re learning, Raymond,” said Ada somewhere in my head. “Good for you. But I was talking about the phone in the elevator. I was pleased with that. Thought it was a nice touch.”
Fourth floor. Going up.
I said, “Okay, so you know where I am and you know where I’m going and who I’m going to see when I get there. Don’t try and stop me. Remember what I said.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” she said. “Tell the Prof I said hi, won’t you?”
Now was about the time I would have smiled, if I could smile. My face couldn’t bend that way, so I smiled on the inside. Ada chuckled in my ear because I guess she could tell I was smiling on the inside too.
“I’m going to get him to fix the program, Ada. You know what that means?”
“I’m all ears, Chief.”
“It means,” I said into the elevator phone as the elevator cruised between the fifth and sixth floors like an ocean liner cruising to the moon, “that he’s going to fix you, and then maybe we can get back to some real detective work like I was built for.”
“I’m sorry, Raymond.”
It sure sounded like there was concern in her voice, but like everything about Ada it wasn’t real. Not the smoky voice, not the laughter, not anything. It was all simulated. Ada wasn’t a person like I wasn’t a person. When she said she was sorry she was only pretending to be sorry, like I was only pretending to be a private eye. Until recently, anyway.
“It’s not your fault, Ada. You’re only doing what your code tells you to do.”
Seventh floor.
“I’ve been working on a little something, Raymondo,” she said. “While you’ve been out. Think I have it figured out, but I haven’t been able to test it yet. I think you’ll like it.”
“That’s why I’m here,” I said. “To stop you working on those somethings, little or large. I’ll talk to you later, when this is all over.”
The elevator bell rang and I went to put the telephone back behind the emergency panel, but before I did that I heard Ada say that she had to do what she had to do, that I really was very good at my job and if only I was a little more cooperative then everything would work a lot better, and that I really wouldn’t feel a thing.
Because I couldn’t feel a thing. I’m a machine who looks roughly like a man because he has two arms and two legs and a head and speaks with a Bronx accent because that’s what I was programmed to speak with.
I put the phone back on the cradle and Ada was still talking in my head. And I turned around and looked at myself in the mirror at the back of the elevator.
Ada kept talking and for a moment there I wasn’t sure who I was looking at.
In the back of my mind, an alarm went off. I woke up.
And then I remembered.
And then Ada laughed and said “Hey, presto!” and wished me good luck.
* * *
The elevator doors opened and I stepped out into the corridor and turned to my left. He was waiting there, down the end of the hall, outside the doors to his private lab.
He looked happy to see me and worried at the same time. After all, he never expected to see me again and I never really expected to be here. He took the pipe out of his mouth but he didn’t say anything.
I remembered something about something the Prof could fix, because he was the only one who could do it, but I felt fine and Ada had just told me everything was fine and that I wouldn’t feel a thing.
Good old Ada. She was right too. She was my partner and she made a compelling case. And I really was very good at my job. And hell, they really did pay very well for this kind of thing.
So I reached into the inside pocket of my trench coat and took out the brown paper parcel, and out of the brown paper parcel I took the gun.
Thornton didn’t look too happy. I guess I didn’t blame him.
But sometimes you have to take what jobs you can. And like I said, Ada made a compelling case. We made quite the team. Just took me a little while to figure it out. She helped too. She woke me up.
“Hello, Professor,” I said. He looked afraid but he didn’t go back into his laboratory. He even took a little step forward, like he wasn’t sure
And I was pleased to see him, although I couldn’t show it on my face. But when I raised the gun up I sure was smiling on the inside.
About the Author
Photograph by Lou Abercrombie
ADAM CHRISTOPHER is a novelist, comic book writer, and award-winning editor. The author of Seven Wonders, The Age Atomic, and Hang Wire, and cowriter of The Shield for Dark Circle Comics, Adam has also written novels based on the hit CBS television show Elementary. His debut novel, Empire State, was SciFiNow’s Book of the Year and a Financial Times Book of the Year for 2012. Born in New Zealand, Adam has lived in Great Britain since 2006. Find him online at www.adamchristopher.co.uk and on Twitter as @ghostfinder.
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BY ADAM CHRISTOPHER
THE EMPIRE STATE
Empire State
The Age of Atomic
THE SPIDER WARS
The Burning Dark
The Machine Awakens
“Cold War”
THE L.A. TRILOGY
Made to Kill
Killing Is My Business
“Brisk Money”
Standard Hollywood Depravity
Elementary: The Ghost Line
Elementary: Blood and Ink
Seven Wonders
Hang Wire
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Table of Contents
Title Page
Copyright Notice
Dedication
Acknowledgements
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12
13
14
Bonus Story: Brisk Money
About the Author
By Adam Christopher
Copyright Page
This is a work of fiction. All of the characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this novella are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.
STANDARD HOLLYWOOD DEPRAVITY
Copyright © 2017 by Seven Wonders Ltd.
Cover art and design by Will Staehle
Edited by Miriam Weinberg
All rights reserved.
A Tor.com Book
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ISBN 978-0-7653-9182-7 (ebook)
ISBN 978-0-7653-9183-4 (trade paperback)
First Edition: March 2017
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