I Spy: My Life In MI5

by Tom Marcus

  ‘From Zero Six, that’s MAGENTA STOAT and LAST DAWN now walking west. LAST DAWN is looking through the scope, talking into his walkie-talkie. No longer looking at Six Eight.’

  ‘From Base, good job guys. Can we get eyes on TURQUOISE FLAMINGO please, we believe they are using him to identify potential surveillance in the area.’

  ‘From Team Leader, anyone still north in the park able to assist while Zero Six keeps hold of these two in the south of the park?’

  ‘Charlie Seven has control of TURQUOISE FLAMINGO. He’s now walking north on Maze Hill going past the school to his right-hand side. He’s very aware, looking at every vehicle as he passes.’

  Perimeter check. The Russians must be confident they are alone in the park, but needed to check that no surveillance teams had surrounded them on the outside.

  ‘From Team Leader, roger that. Vehicle crews, can you satellite around so TURQUOISE FLAMINGO doesn’t catch you on the perimeter please.’

  Graeme didn’t really need to tell us this, the team would naturally do it without being asked, but given the high stakes and the fact we seemed to have a director running our operation back at Thames House now, it didn’t hurt to remind everyone.

  ‘Zero Six, you’ve got Nine Three and Six Nine to the north of their position in the bandstand.’

  I was watching the Russians still walking and now turning slightly north-west towards the centre of the park. They looked through their scopes again, and it wasn’t long before MAGENTA STOAT spotted Jenny and David inside the bandstand.

  ‘Roger that. Guys, MAGENTA STOAT is pointing the laser directly at you and they are static, watching through their scopes.’

  I tightened the zoom again, I knew the geeks in Thames House would want as much video evidence as possible. Jenny and David were playing the drunk couple hugging and stumbling. Jenny fitted the part perfectly, tracksuit top unzipped and falling off her shoulder, a messy side ponytail. She was trying to pull David into her for a hug, while he looked like he was too pissed to care.

  The laser went dead and was put away into MAGENTA STOAT’s pocket, ‘For information, that’s MAGENTA STOAT and LAST DAWN continuing to walk west, scopes away in their bags. Posture has changed, they seem more relaxed, walking slower.’

  We might have just pulled this off. ‘Charlie Seven, roger. TURQUOISE FLAMINGO has now taken a right and east walking on Westcombe Park Road. Team Leader, can we get Red Team to take this off me?’

  ‘Yeah, let him run Charlie Seven, Red Team Leader has confirmed they can take him on.’

  If TURQUOISE FLAMINGO was moving out of the area, these two must be feeling pretty confident they were unobserved in the park now. As they continued to walk away from me the trees were starting to hinder my view. Just as I was about to transmit for help in watching them both, they stopped dead right next to what looked like a shed.

  ‘Base, acknowledge you’re getting this. It’s a stop stop both outside that small building?’

  ‘Base have seen, thank you.’ It was our normal operations officer back on the net, no longer Director G.

  MAGENTA STOAT reached into his bag again, taking out a small thin object about the size of a large chocolate bar. Neither man was looking around; they felt safe here.

  ‘From Zero Six, MAGENTA STOAT has taken something from his bag and placed it in the roof overhang of the shed.’

  ‘Base, roger that, have seen.’

  ‘Tech Team likewise, have seen.’

  This operation was pulling in people from everywhere. We hunted the most dangerous terrorists in the world, out on the streets walking among people who were potentially about to be killed by these fucking cowards. We prevented almost all attacks and I’d always felt like we had every tool at our disposal whenever we needed it. But I’d never experienced this much input on a job.

  ‘Zero Six from Base, are you able to watch them away if they do a reciprocal route back to their car?’

  ‘Yes yes, but if they turn south on Maze Hill again I’ll need help while I shift positions to watch them walk south.’

  ‘Team Leader, roger that Zero Six. Stations, if they get back to the car I’m going to let Blue Team take them on and we’ll stay in position here for a few hours just in case the area is being watched.’

  Graeme’s plan was spot on. If there were more players involved in this job that we didn’t know about and they were watching this park and local streets for any movement reacting to the Russians’ departure, then we’d compromise the whole job if we left straight after they did. I just needed to get out of this building before anyone turned up for work in the morning.

  ‘Zero Six, roger, that’s MAGENTA STOAT and LAST DAWN walking east, back towards the rough area where they jumped the wall.’

  They were both extremely relaxed, not scanning the area and appearing to be in a natural conversation. As they approached the wall again it felt like they believed this had been a successful dead drop, whether it was a practice run or not. They thought they had gotten away with it.

  ‘From Zero Six, they are about to vault the wall again onto Maze Hill. Can anyone assist while I change positions?’

  As soon as I’d recorded their final move over the wall I slid the camera back into my bag, listening to the comms on the radio as the team took control of them. Carefully planting my feet, I worked my way backwards to the other side of the roof where the ladder was. I stayed quiet knowing the Russians were parallel to me again. It was one big game of shadows, moving in their orbit without being seen or remembered for the wrong thing.

  ‘Team Leader from Base, if MAGENTA STOAT and LAST DAWN get back to their vehicle we are happy for Blue Team to take them away and for your team to move out of the area once you’re ready.’

  ‘Team Leader, roger that and have seen. Team Leader has control of MAGENTA STOAT and LAST DAWN now south on Maze Hill past the junction of Charlton Way.’

  I hadn’t made it across to the other side of the roof yet, but if they were under control and walking away from me there was very little to be gained from filming their backs unless it would help one of the team out so they could pull back slightly.

  ‘Zero Six, roger, I’m not in a position to assist yet.’

  ‘Team Leader, don’t worry mate, I’ve got control. Both now still southbound walking fairly quickly to the rough turning of Shooter’s Hill and the area of their car. Stations, for your information if they get into the car I’ll give them away and Blue Team will take them on. We stay in position.’

  It helped a lot having other teams on this too. It meant our guys living their cover in the park – Mark lying under a tree, Jenny and David in the bandstand and anyone else who was out on foot – didn’t have to peel off quickly and get to their cars, which when you are living your cover is very difficult to do securely.

  Still moving across the beam, I wanted to be in a position to help out in case I was needed but crucially I was thinking about getting ready to move down the ladder.

  ‘Stations, that’s both targets at the vehicle now. Wait one,’ Graeme said.

  ‘MAGENTA STOAT into driver’s seat, LAST DAWN into the passenger seat, car lights on.’

  ‘Blue Team Leader from Green Team, STAND BY STAND BY, that’s the vehicle now u-turn eastbound on Shooter’s Hill towards Prince of Wales Road, all yours.’

  ‘Blue Team Leader roger, we have control.’

  ‘Base, roger all the last. Green Team, happy for you to extract when it’s secure. Base out.’

  I really wanted to get down now. It’s amazing once you spend some time in the dark how much your eyes adjust. Now I’d had a break from looking into the camera’s viewfinder I could see almost everything around me.

  Despite the severity of this operation, now another team had control we were effectively just hiding in this area. It’s much simpler and reminded me of being a kid playing hide and seek.

  Living your cover doesn’t stop when the targets leave the area or when another team takes over control, allowin
g you to go back for debrief and then home. You have to constantly think about the area, the people that live or work there all the time.

  Think about your home right now, or the place you work. You would notice if a car parked up outside your house with someone sat behind the wheel, wouldn’t you? Unless they had a cover – courier, taxi, pizza delivery guy, something like that. It’s for that exact reason we don’t make an area red-hot, because for all we know we could be working in it for years. Plus, if the locals, who have no idea MI5 are in the area, feel like something is not right then terrorists or foreign intelligence agents on the lookout for us will certainly feel it too.

  Sitting on a dusty beam with my legs hanging down near the ladder, waiting for time to pass so we could start slowly extracting out of the area, I felt like a fucking gnome. The mental image prompted me to cast an imaginary fishing line. Smiling, I found a rare moment of peace amid the chaos of one of our most dangerous operations. I tried to cling onto it for as long as I could, but was immediately brought crashing back to reality when Mark transmitted that he was starting to make his move to leave the area. He’d come close to a seriously bad situation.

  I wasn’t smiling anymore. All I could think about was home. I wanted to get out of this fucking roof, and drive back to my family. I was seriously starting to question my place on this earth. Outside the team I had no friends at all. I think because I give off a very serious, driven vibe people mistake that for arrogance or being a bit prickly. The truth is that it didn’t bother me that I didn’t have friends to have a pint with or invite round for a barbecue, because I’ve got my family. What was bothering me now though was that I was away from them, that yet again I had made the decision that working with the team was more important than being a dad and a husband.

  So there I sat, looking like a lonely fucking gnome, feeling sorry for myself and hating every part of me. One big pity party. It was just another emotional thought I’d lock away in a cupboard that was already bursting at the seams.

  12

  TAKING A BEATING

  I’d managed to spend most of the next day with my family, doing the things every normal father and husband would do. Tidying up after breakfast, trying to make brushing my son’s teeth fun for him so he continues to do it properly when he’s older. Getting outside in the fresh air to play, making some lunch, tidying up again after my son had decided he wanted to make dens while at the same time playing Lego. Standing on Lego barefoot! The normality to me was incredible and I wanted to soak it up like a sponge.

  I wasn’t due back with the team until the morning so we had a rare night together as a family, bath time then stories, bed for my son and a quick tidy up followed by the rarest thing of all – some adult conversation with my wife in front of the TV. It was a peace I was craving and I knew my being here with my family made them happier too. Maybe I needed to think about doing something else? Maybe the world didn’t revolve around the teams. After all, what was I doing all this for if I couldn’t share it with the ones I love? In my heart of hearts I knew that this feeling would be gone as soon as I was back on the ground.

  Drifting off to sleep in our own bed with my wife was absolutely brilliant. Perfect. I was almost looking forward to my dreams that night. I was so relaxed and happy there was no way I was going to have any nightmares about work.

  It was dark, well after midnight, when I heard the most horrific scream, like an animal gasping its last breath. Springing straight out of bed, I knew this wasn’t a dream, it was my son! I bolted into his bedroom, barely registering when the door handle dug into my waist and took a good chunk of skin with it. I could see my son having a full fit, absolutely rigid and convulsing fiercely.

  ‘AMBULANCE, RING IT NOW!’

  Lucy came rocketing in, phone in hand, already hitting the last nine and pressing call. I scooped up my son, and could feel his skin was clammy and red-hot to the touch as he continued to fit, his eyes rolled completely back into his head. FUCK. Operator mode kicked in instantly and I laid him down on his side on the soft carpet. I checked his airway as Lucy gave the details of what was happening to the emergency services operator.

  Check his airway, if he’s fitting it’s likely he could throw up too. Keeping him on his side, supporting his head, I could see he was completely unresponsive as his tiny body shook with a violence I was struggling to support. God, please don’t let him die. Please.

  Lucy was still on the phone as she bolted downstairs to unlock the door for the ambulance and sprinted back up with an in-ear thermometer. ‘Please, be quick. I’m taking his temperature now.’

  She passed me the thermometer and I held it in his ear as his convulsions started to slow. ‘It’s 40.1!’ I knew this was bad. Lucy relayed the temperature over the phone as I realized he was going downhill fast. ‘Tell them he’s got cyanosis, skin has gone ash too.’

  He was suffering from lack of oxygen. I checked his airway. Nothing. Rolling him onto his back I saw there was no rise and fall of his chest at all. Another check of his airway showed his tongue had relaxed and needed pulling forward. I knew I had to start breathing for him.

  ‘We’re starting mouth to mouth now, hurry up!’

  Lucy was fairly calm on the phone considering, but inside I knew she would be a wreck. Don’t think about that now. Come on, little buddy. One quick breath, a rescue breath we call it, and his chest rose, instantly followed by a huge cry, the sort of cry that young children give when they’ve really hurt themselves or are deeply upset. It was the single best thing I could have heard at that point. He was breathing.

  At that moment time the paramedics shouted hello and raced upstairs to join us in my son’s bedroom. ‘Ah, that’s a good sound to hear, are you mum and dad?’

  The paramedic was incredibly good as he assessed the situation, kneeling down to look at my son who was now cradled in my arms. My son gazed at the faces staring back at him, wondering what all the fuss was about.

  ‘Tell me what happened, Dad.’ The paramedic started to do his obs while I gave him a break down.

  ‘No allergies or history of fitting, fit and well. We woke up about four minutes ago when he let out a huge scream. Came straight in and he was in a full fit, temperature was 40.1 from his ear. The fitting slowed down after three minutes and he showed strong signs of cyanosis and ashen skin.’

  Giving the paramedic a moment to listen to my son’s lungs, I continued, ‘His airway was blocked by a relaxed tongue and there was no rise and fall in his chest, I pulled his tongue forward and gave a rescue breath which immediately brought him round, and you arrived just at that point.’

  ‘OK, while he’s awake and clearly has healthy lungs judging by his crying, we still need to get him straight in, OK?’ The paramedic looked towards Lucy, ‘Do you want to travel with us in the ambulance, Mum?’

  ‘Yes, I’ll just get some clothes for him.’

  ‘Lucy, bag behind the door, one for you, one for little legs.’

  Having grab bags ready to go might seem extreme to some people, but it’s something we’d always done. Better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it. Clothes, phone charger, bottle of water, spare change, couple of snack bars.

  ‘I’ll follow you in the car.’ Passing my son over to Lucy, I threw some clothes on quickly and was jumping into my team car as Lucy climbed into the back of the ambulance that was waiting outside.

  The drive from our house to the hospital wasn’t that long, but you did have to cross some awkward junctions in which traffic could be hard to pass even with flashing blue lights. I wasn’t about to take that chance and overtook the ambulance as soon as possible, blocking each side junction to allow the ambulance free passage at every opportunity. The last one was a roundabout which cars tended to fly around despite it being partially blind – you couldn’t see all the exits or cars coming onto it. With the flashing blue lights of the ambulance behind me I hit the brakes hard and put my hazards on just to the right of the roundabout.

&nbs
p; I was met with the sight of a police car. The driver immediately recognized the blocking procedure, tied my car to the ambulance’s blue lights and put his blues on as well. As the ambulance moved past with my wife and son on board I nodded my thanks to the police officer holding traffic back and made my way past the ambulance again towards the hospital. I knew I still had to park up and wanted to meet Lucy outside A & E. Bursting the red lights, I got to the car park, almost ripping the ticket out of the machine as I entered.

  The ambulance pulled up as I ran towards the A & E entrance. I was there in time to help Lucy get down the drop step as she cradled our son, who was now incredibly sleepy. The energy his little body used up during the violent fit must have been massive.

  The triage nurse saw us straight away and led us into a private room with the paramedic, who was still giving him the information he needed. As the nurse, and then a doctor, started to check on my son, I saw the paramedic getting ready to leave and went to shake his hand and thank him.

  ‘Where did you two have your training?’ he asked. He saw the confusion on my face. ‘It was calm when I arrived and you reeled off exactly what I needed to know. Most parents are beyond hysterical in these situations. Especially when performing mouth to mouth.’

  I hadn’t thought about it. Lucy had overheard the conversation and her eyes flicked towards me, knowing I would be giving a cover story.

  ‘Oh, we both did this first responder course with the local college when Lucy was pregnant. Never thought we’d actually need to use it though! Thanks again for everything.’

  As he went I was pleased the ambulance driver wasn’t with him, as he might well be curious about where I’d learned to block traffic the way I had.