Sticky Valves: Book 1 of the Saddleworth Vampire Series

by Angela Blythe

  ‘No, Barry has said to me that, as I haven't been at rehearsals, I'm on sleighbells all night,’ Woody replied flatly.

  Laura felt her shoulders relax. The last thing she wanted him to do was to say he wanted the timp seat, where all the weapons were hidden. Good old Bob had worked it out and offered up the drum kit seat. She was highly amused though, that even as a vampire, Barry had musical standards and wasn’t going to let Woody bungle up the concert by sight reading.

  The vampires all sat down and then realised what they could smell. And what they were sitting right next to.

  ‘There's garlic everywhere!’ exclaimed Sophie wrinkling her nose in disgust.

  ‘Yeah and it isn't my bolognese either, before you start,’ announced Danny. The living band members all laughed.

  ‘You stink,’ Vicky said under her breath to Pat.

  ‘That’s rich!’ Pat defensively squawked. ‘Do you think we smell as bad as you all do? You are rotten and smell like the grave, you dirty bugger. I’ve seen inside one of you, and you’re green. Green, yes! I wouldn’t use that horn after you for a million quid!’ The rest of her group laughed loudly.

  ‘Well said, Pat,' said Wee Renee, 'They smell like poopoo.’ Even more laughter erupted.

  Ernie and Lynn had moved to the back of the hall. Unaffected by Pat and Wee Renee’s comments they calmly waited for the laughter to stop.

  ‘Are we ready to open the doors, everyone?’ The calmness in which Ernie said the words was chilling. They could not shake off the feeling that, they were going to lose. It had never crossed the minds of the vampires that they might not win. They were all fully confident of success. The realisation dawned on them, that this had all been a big mistake. A huge trap. Was it really worth carrying on normal life, just for life to end so soon?

  A sudden gust of cold air hit them as Ernie opened the doors in the foyer. They heard Ernie say ‘Hello, hello. You’re a bit late.’ In walked Michael Thompson, Norman Morgan and the lady that had been at the party, Kate, less than a month ago. A further wave of dread swept over them. The main man was here, the original monster. The one that had defiled their band. They heard someone else’s footsteps clatter in the foyer.

  ‘Wait for Chrissy.’ In walked Christine Baker, in what they imagined was her Christmas Outfit. It was unbelievably tight and glittery for such a large lady. She also was wearing thigh length boots.

  Liz didn’t even notice her, she was fully in a panic now and thought that Norman was there just for her. The final one he hadn’t managed to turn. She could hear the blood rushing in her ears. Her breath was quiet and light. Liz felt like she was barely breathing at all. She felt herself watching him walk up the aisle, even though she didn’t want to believe he was there. As if he knew, he looked back at her and kept his gaze fixed as he made his way right up to front seats, where all of them could see him. She was lost, she knew it.

  ‘Don’t look in his eyes.’ Wee Renee whispered to her.

  Before anything else could happen they started to hear children's voices from a distance and the rest of the audience started to enter. Children that were in the choir came in with their parents and then sat on seats to the right of the band in orderly lines, Mrs White directing them to each particular place. Mr Shufflebotham arrived in his best suit very pleased with himself and sat next to Mrs White.

  As the audience continued to file in, the group of heroes realised that it was hard for the vampires not to reveal their intentions as they came in. They smiled at each other with a knowing look and they were noticeably pale. If you knew what you were looking for, it was very easy to see who was, and wasn’t one. There certainly were some children that had been turned. Some looked very gaunt, their small eyes were animated and darting about hungry. They all still attended with their parents, some who had succumbed to their young ones advances at one point, it was clear. Christine stood up and turned, looking at the main doors and started waving towards the back of the hall.

  ‘Wayne, sweetie! Here, here, I have saved you a seat!’ She beckoned with her hand. When the postman looked towards her from the back of the hall, he definitely looked like he wasn't enjoying his new-found death. He looked like a zombie, or someone who was on very heavy drugs and being manipulated. Wayne dragged his feet forward; not knowing what he was doing, not caring. He walked slowly up to the front, weaving clumsily between kids and parents as they decided where they were going to sit. Dropping himself down in the seat, blinking, he sat next to Christine. Keith’s wife Yvonne came in. She was quite obviously one of Keith victims and she made her way through the crowd to sit next to Karen who was Colin’s wife. She had been got at as well.

  Simon, who unfortunately was always too busy looking at himself in the mirror, found himself noticing the truth finally from his vantage point at the front, in the harsh lighting. He saw, horrifically, that his wife Sandra and his mistress Tracy came in together linking arms. They stared at their lover, their eyes telling him everything he needed to know about them. His two children came in behind Sandra and she took them to the back to sit with Mrs White. It was quite apparent, that she had remade them her own children.

  ‘In the Bleak Midwinter,’ Gary said to the band and everyone, even the vampires and Barry, started to prepare for the carol. They started to play. Barry was conducting, a very strange group, indeed. They were so busy playing and looking out to the audience that they did not notice that someone was coming from behind them, out of the stage door. It was Stuart who was also the Civic Hall caretaker. He waited until they finished their carol then cleared his throat.

  ‘Everything to your satisfaction?’ he asked and smiled wide, His back to the audience, he showed his new teeth, quite happily. They had obviously known that he was one too after Laura had seen him the previous week, with Keith, but had forgotten. Again, another wave of defeat swept over them, as they were so vastly outnumbered.

  Sue watched from the side, not being a player. She counted the number of people in the band that they would have to kill, including Barry. There were twelve vampires in the band so if they all got one each that would be fine. They did still slightly outnumber the vampires, including her. However, she could also count about twenty or thirty more at least in the audience, and the children with Mrs White.

  Ernie slammed the two front doors, which shocked vampires and non-vampires with its boom, and then walked into the main hall. He walked to the front, as always to start the concert and welcome the audience.

  ‘Welcome everyone. To all the audience from Friarmere Primary, and all village guests. I am heartened to see that so many have made it here through this weather. I have shut out the cold out now, so let us have a great concert. Shall we start, Barry?’

  Bob's stomach turned over.. it was going to happen. Barry lifted up his baton and they started to play.

  25 - Gun

  As it was, they didn't even get through the first Carol. Norman stood up right in the middle of it. The band watched him, terrified as to what he was going to do. Liz didn’t even have enough breath to play her cornet, but just held it to her lips. Kate followed him, then Christine and Michael. It was as if this was the signal to start. They stood up and started walking to the door, back down the aisle, the rest of the audience wondering what these four people were doing.

  As they reached the back row, Norman took two children firmly by their upper arms and pulled them through the doors. Micheal Thompson turned back towards the band, and bowed low to them. Andy thought that Norman wasn’t as clever as he thought, giving Michael even a little bit of power. All this went on as the band still played. Just then, Christine turned around shocked and looked back to the front.

  ‘Oh no! Wayne, sweetie is still there!’ She quickly clacked her way back up to the front, with everyone watching her open mouthed, ‘Come on, come on. Drinky!’ He got up slowly, still appearing to be drugged and started to walk out, but by then Norman, Kate and Michael had shut the doors and barred them from the outside.

  Th
e band vampires put down their instruments and regarded the people seated at the side of them. The children who were vampires beamed at the thought of the fun they would have. They each had their first victim in their sights. One of the children tip-toed over to Mrs White, sat on her lap, as if to be comforted, nuzzled their head, into her neck and bit down.

  ‘Go!’ shouted Gary. There was a lot of movement in the audience. Some people just ran to the back of the doors, with their children, but they could not get out. They had seen the child bite down on Mrs White and had felt for a while, that the atmosphere was electric with the coming attractions. Pat took the knife off the back of her horn, unobserved, as Vicky was turning to Andy. Vicky was thinking this was her lucky day. This wasn’t happening on Pat's watch and she plunged the knife in the back of Vicky's neck. It came straight through the other side. Pat put both hands on the knife and moved it up and down, making a three inch gash with her knife. The metal made a grating sound on Vicky’s neck bones, and the vibration went up Pat’s arm. A strange blackish green fluid, which quickly turned to dry powder, dribbled off the tip of the knife onto Andy uniform. She shook once then collapsed on the floor.

  ‘One down,' said Pat, setting her jaw again. Tony did not have his eye on Keith so he did not see Keith push Roger’s chair over, on to the carpet. Roger was struggling with his instrument, on top of him, flapping about on the floor. Keith rose from his seat, and straightened his collar and tie, before casually kneeling down and biting into Roger’s neck. His back pulsated as he drank. Then he twisted his head to one side and drew quickly up, fully tearing a piece out of Roger’s throat, after draining his life away. Tony was watching Barry. Currently not attacking anyone, he seemed almost sad at the prospect of it all and when Tony ran at him, with one of Ian's long knives, his two hands on the handle and hacked him straight across the neck, he did not even try to defend himself.

  Graham on B-flat tuba, the biggest of the instruments, was very unfortunate to have a vampire either side of him. His instrument was in the way of him leaning over and getting his weapon out from under his chair. He then remembered that he had also put one down the back of his jacket by the collar. Now he didn’t know which to go for, but was a little too late as both vampires already with their instruments down, began to advance on him from either side. He managed to get his knife out quickly from down his collar and in one moment as he drew it out, he slashed Vincent across the cheek which did not bleed at all he noticed, but just made a black slash. Bob was behind him however and drove a sharpened drumstick through the chest of Colin. This did not kill him, Bob was shocked to see. Maybe he had not got the heart or maybe wood did not work at all. However, there was an unholy scream from Colin, who began to beat at the area where the drumstick was embedded. He didn’t try to remove it however. It was strange to see that it did not kill him, but he could not touch it. He seemed to think the best thing was to run away, maybe to plunge himself into the snow. Bob thought does it burn? He ran out of the main room to the exit. Bashing himself constantly into the doors, his skin and face starting to break up.

  One fact interested Bob. He had noticed that it was very easy to plunge that drumstick into Colin. They seemed kind of soft, even before they were truly dead. Again, it reminded him of something inflatable. Graham could still not reach his weapon under his chair so he thrashed around at Vincent to try and keep him at bay. He moved backwards and his hand latched on to his tuba mouthpiece. He twisted the mouthpiece out of the instrument. Using the full length of his arm he punched it into Vincent's eye, the spigot of the mouthpiece going deep into the vampire’s head. A black slimy substance started to run languidly out of the mouthpiece that was now firmly wedged into the eye socket and Vincent screamed and fell to the floor. That looked like that was it, for him. Vincent started to crawl away and Graham watched him go, finally free of the two of them. It was because of that, that he did not see Colin’s wife Wendy, behind him. He did however, feel her stab him in the back with some scissors that she held. She pushed him down onto the floor, her strength greater than his. Graham’s head fell on the carpet. The rough nylon was coarse on his face. Wendy was only five foot two and he was six foot four, now she was above him. He tried to raise himself and managed to get his body up into a push up position. The pain was crippling. She picked up his tuba like it was a bunch of tulips, lifted it up over her head, and back down onto the scissors, further pushing them through into Graham's body. They came out at a point just above his heart the other side and he looked down at it for one brief second before falling back onto the floor.

  ‘Kids! Food!’ she shouted. A few of the children who were not attacking scrambled up over the chairs and instruments, like rats and started to feed on the freshly dead Graham.

  Laura had been really excited and had been sharpening her sticks for three days with a penknife. Between her and Bob she had an idea that they had maybe one-hundred wooden stakes between them. She hated the fact that she was doing this to expensive sticks but they wouldn’t mean anything to her if she was dead. When Bob did not kill with his first drumstick she knew that they could only be used as a kind of a pokey thing and not a form of instant death weapon, which made her even angrier. Laura had effectively ruined all her sticks. Now she really did want revenge.

  She noticed that Keith's wife, Yvonne, was making her way painstakingly to the front. She was indeed a strong vampire. Maybe Keith had given her his inner strength too. She seemed very powerful and was tossing parents and children, left, right and centre on her way to get to Keith. Laura wanted to prevent this from happening, as the two of them working as a duo would be pretty formidable. She was quite a distance away, but she noticed Gary was halfway between Keith and Yvonne. She shouted over to Gary, gesturing over to Yvonne.

  ‘Stop her, Gary.’ Gary was doing pretty well and had already taken out four vampires. He had put his flugelhorn case underneath his seat and inside it he had his tool belt. He had quickly put this on, and it had all his best weapons on it. He had a battery operated nail gun and this was proving to be a brilliant deterrent. It did not fully kill them but it certainly stunned than enough and you could be quite far away to use it. Now it was himself, Bob, Tony and Danny that were moving forward getting each predator. As they moved forward, four onto one it only took a few seconds for each, as they chopped and hacked and nail gunned their way through the attack.

  Sue had heard Laura’s shout, looked across and knew what she was trying to prevent. She could see that Yvonne was moving forwards towards Keith. In between were quite a few vampires and also the group of four trying to save them all. Gary had his eye on Yvonne. She was about three vampires away from them. Yvonne looked like she was going to move out to the side to avoid the four hero’s. Sue moved forward and went under Tony's seat. She had been determined for him not to use this gun, but by god, if Yvonne was going to touch her boy she would be using it in a heartbeat.

  She pulled it out, ripped the tape off, and walked a few steps towards Yvonne, checking out the status of the situation. Yvonne was still fixed on Keith, who was dealing with a few parents quite strictly at the moment so did not see her. However, with his improved sense of hearing he did hear the click of the gun as Sue walked a few more steps without fear to Yvonne. She put it to her head and pulled the trigger.

  The boom scared everyone, who could not mistake it for anything else. Yvonne fell to the floor, flat on her back. Unsure whether she would get up again, Gary walked over to her, wiggled the nail gun into her slightly open mouth and pressed the trigger. Yvonne screamed, but not very well as he had attached her tongue to the back of her head. He put his foot on her chest and she clutched at his leg, her eyes, watering and bloodshot were full of hatred. Placing the nail gun back in her mouth, he pressed the trigger three more times. The scream cut off and her head was now securely attached to the floorboards. The grip around Gary’s leg loosened and then her arms dropped to her sides. Her eyes forever would be fixed on Gary. The vampires scattered and Gary, Bob,
Danny, Tony and Sue, were quite free in the centre. Keith lifted his head upwards, yelling out his frustration from the bottom of his stomach. It was a guttural inhuman sound with no words, which shocked the crowd once more.

  The army of five, split outwards. Danny scanned the crowd for Stephen Thompson. He had not targeted Danny, who he was sitting beside in band, which was very fortunate for Danny, as he had been busy watching Norman walk out the door. He spied Stephen, trying to drag some small children out of the back door for himself. Danny could see that he had already laid waste to a couple of kids by his condition. The front of his face and his shirt were drenched with the children's blood. He ran after him.

  After Andy and Pat had finished dealing with Vicky they decided to move over and help on the cornet section. The only three that were not vampires were Liz, Simon and Wee Renee. Pat looked over at them with a steely gaze. They would hurt Wee Renee over her dead body, if that is what it took. Andy was going to save his beloved Liz. She had fought all this time and he wasn't going to let all that be for nothing. Jake had his eye on Liz and she was hitting him up the head with her instrument case, which was full of weapons, so was heavy and noisy. He just kept on coming back at her. Andy came behind him. His weapon was from Ian’s shop. He imagined it was for chopping meat, but it was a cross between a machete and an axe. Andy brought it back, aiming at Jake and then it whistled forwards with a thwack across Jakes upper arms. It cut straight through half his arm and partway through the bone. If Andy could aim it right, he could take that right off in the next chop. This he did, which made him extremely happy. The vampire didn’t seem to notice. Then he did the same on Jake’s neck. The first whack, made Jake swivel round at him, his head, cocked to one side. The green black blood ran down from the top of where his arm used to be, staining the side of his uniform. Jake’s mouth opened and shut mechanically, getting slower and slower, like a wind up toy, coming to a stop. Andy had to hit him from a different direction to take off his head, but he managed after three tries.