Summer State of Mind

by Jen Calonita

  “Essentials.” I may have left my survival gear, but I was not heading into the woods without a good humidity-busting hairspray.

  “Don’t sweat Jeanie,” he tells me. “She’s been fiery ever since we started at the Pines together. Once you get to know her, she’ll back off. She’s just protective of this place.”

  “And who am I? A logger bent on destroying the Pines to make paper out of the cabins?” I ask angrily. “Of course you’d take her side. You’re both Lifers.” I try to speed up to get away from him. Sadly, I am not that fast.

  “Harper, wait,” Ethan says. “I’m sorry, okay? That was stupid of me to say. Jeanie and I have been friends for a long time, but you’re my friend, too.”

  We’re friends now? I stop, but I won’t look at him. The others are barely a dot in a distance. Any minute they’re going to go over that next hill, and who knows which way they will go next. I kind of need Ethan’s help here, but I’m too mad to even look at him.

  He hesitates. “Being popular has always come easily for you, but camp is different. Most of us have grown up together. They’ve seen me make a fool of myself in a blueberry pie–eating contest and when I’m full of myself for winning Color War and need a bucket of water dumped on my head. The people who go here are as real as they get, so they’re a little more guarded about who they let into their fold.”

  Real. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Kate without eyeliner. Margo maybe (she loves listening to Bruno Mars while she wears slices of cucumbers on her eyelids). “Everyone here seems like family,” I admit as we trudge uphill. Why can’t hikes be on flat roads?

  “They are,” Ethan agrees. “Which is why they don’t open up overnight.”

  Kate let me in the first day I met her. We’ve been shopping together ever since. I’ve always considered us the three amigos, but when I think of Lina’s gift this morning, I have to wonder what defines a real friend. Is it someone with a lot of rules to the friendship or someone who likes you without conditions? I’m not saying any of this to Ethan. I’m still annoyed that he is such a Lifer like the rest of them. “They have two weeks to let me in. After that I’m out of—OUCH!” I stumble a bit. “Foot stings! I need a pedicurist STAT!”

  “Let me look.” Ethan drops to his knees to examine my right leg. “Nice Chucks.”

  “I bedazzled them myself,” I say through the pain. “I just wish I hadn’t washed them the other night. They’re so tight now I can’t wear socks with them.” He massages my calf, and I flinch.

  “I don’t think it’s your leg that bothers you—you have a blister on your heel,” Ethan says. “You’re not going to make it around the next bend if we don’t get you a Band-Aid. Sit.”

  I don’t argue, even if I feel weird having him help me after I just bit his head off. I take a seat on a large rock on the side of the road as he rummages around his backpack. Ethan’s really organized. All his clothes are rolled tight, and he has Ziploc bags with a first-aid kit, bug spray, and other mini products. He hands me two Band-Aids and a pair of bright pink socks. “Put these on. And don’t tell me you are anti-socks.”

  I look at the rolled-up pink socks. “Nope. These are actually cool.”

  “They should be. They’re my lucky basketball socks.” He blushes. “I wear them every game. I play on the same team as Kyle, you know.”

  “I know.” I’ve just never taken the time to talk to you, I think guiltily. I pull off my shoes, stick Band-Aids on my blisters, and then gently pull the socks on. They go up to my knees. “These look good on me! Can’t you just see me racing down a basketball court?”

  Ethan makes an indistinguishable noise. “Running down a basketball court is exactly how I picture a girl who gets out of PE half the year on account of her asthma.”

  My jaw drops. “How do you know about my asthma fake out?”

  “I was in the main office one time when Coach Biggins came in complaining your excuse was a scam,” Ethan says with a smirk. “There was nothing they could do about it because you had a doctor’s note. How’d you sweet-talk yourself into getting one of those?”

  I swing my feet happily. “I have a non-athletic cousin who just became a pediatrician. She feels my pain.”

  He laughs. “You are something else, Harper McAllister.” He stands up and offers me his hand. I can feel the heat of his hand against my palm, and it makes my stomach do a somersault.

  Oh, man. I officially have a crush on a boy who is friends with a girl I loathe. How did this happen?

  I stand up and let go of his hand. “This is much better. Thanks,” I say awkwardly.

  Ethan puts his backpack on again. “Don’t mention it.”

  I wave my hand, hoping to make a breeze. “Has it gotten hotter?”

  “No.” Ethan stares at my outfit. “It’s because you’re wearing jeans.”

  “I know.” I stare down at my chiffon top and capris. “This outfit is all wrong for a camping trip. Now I’m stuck wearing it till tomorrow.”

  “Why till tomorrow?” Ethan asks. “Didn’t you bring a change of clothes?”

  I look at him like he’s insane. “Yes, but I’m not actually changing in the woods.”

  He grins. “Um, we do have these things called tents, you know.”

  “I’m not sleeping in those or catching my own dinner or bathing in the lake, either.”

  Ethan scratches his head. “This is a campout, not a survival training course. Beaver sent hamburgers, hot dogs, and lemonade. You can go fishing, but you’re not catching your own dinner. And the tents are huge and have bottoms.”

  “Oh.” I didn’t realize any of that.

  “Before you say anything else, let me just add that I’ve never seen a bear here,” Ethan adds. “Justin and I think we saw a yeti once, but that’s never been documented.”

  A yeti? My face goes from hot to cold. Those things are real? “We should get a move on.”

  Beads of sweat roll down Ethan’s forehead. “Think you can do a jog to catch up?”

  “How about we walk fast, but not so fast that we get there in time for tent setup?”

  He shakes his head. “Funny. You’re definitely not the girl I thought you were.”

  I push my long layers away from my face. “Is that a bad thing?” My face feels even warmer, if that’s possible. I have an urge to bite my nails when he stares at me like he is doing right now.

  “No.” Ethan gives me a half smile. “You’re just different. I thought a girl like you would be out of here day one, but you’re sticking with it. That’s pretty cool in my book.”

  Ethan effortlessly hikes uphill, even with the two bags on his back. It’s easier to keep up now that my feet aren’t crying. In fact, now that we have a good pace going, I kind of like it. We’re both quiet for a bit, and that’s okay because I’m just enjoying the view. The path ropes lazily around giant pine trees and flowering bushes. Wildflowers grow here and there along the way and make me wonder how no one has stepped on them before. Other than the birds chirping, it’s so quiet I can hear our feet pounding the dirt path. He turns right, and we follow everyone’s footprints just a little farther. I can see smoke coming from what I pray is a grill (not a forest fire about to consume half an acre and me in minutes like in the nightmare I had last night). I’m bummed when I realize we’ve reached the campsite. I liked having Ethan to myself.

  Ethan turns to me. “Not scary, right?” Campers are raising tents and unrolling sleeping bags. A few guys and girls from the other marshmallows bunks are playing a game of touch football in the clearing. Hitch is at the grill making hot dogs. There is even music playing on someone’s iPod shuffle. Dirk, Heath, and Justin are moving some logs around what looks like a campfire.

  “It doesn’t have horror movie written all over it, at least,” I say. “But I still don’t think I can put my head on the ground. Spiders. Worms.” I shudder. “What if they start crawling on me in my sleep? But if I sleep outside the tent, they could still climb on me and then I could be eaten by
a bear, too.” I grab Ethan by his T-shirt and pull him toward me. He looks alarmed. “Maybe I could swim to safety and go back to the Pines. Although that lake over there looks big. A canoe, maybe? Did you bring a raft in that handy backpack of yours?”

  Kyle jogs toward us. “Is she having a panic attack about the bugs again?” Lina, Heath, and Justin walk over behind him.

  Ethan nods as I continue to grip his shirt. “I think so. I’m afraid to move.”

  “Hey, H?” Kyle waves a hand in between my face and Ethan’s. “You in there?”

  I let go of Ethan. I’m hyperventilating like I really do have asthma. I look at Lina. “I should go back to camp. Tell Courtney to radio the chopper to come pick me up.”

  “Chopper?” Lina questions. “Harper, there’s no—”

  I twitch as I hear an owl hoot in the distance. “Or a van? Maybe a nice Jeep? I like Jeeps even if they are open in the back half the time and I could get mauled by a yeti.”

  “Dude!” Justin hits Ethan in the arm. “You told her about our yeti sighting?”

  “It was not a yeti!” Lina jumps in. “It was an overgrown bush.”

  “Oh yeah?” Justin asks. “Then why did it have teeth?”

  I can barely hear what they’re saying. My eyes are on those tents. I have an aversion to spiders. Did I mention that to Courtney before? Why wasn’t that a question in the “getting to know you at the Pines” pamphlet Hitch handed out?

  “I think Harper needs to sit down,” Ethan says. He puts a hand on my back. I cringe when I think of how sweaty I must be.

  “Ethan!” Jeanie yells to him from the field where she’s hanging out with Addison, Camilla, and my bunkmates. Her hair looks even prettier pulled off her face in a ponytail. She’s wearing a green football jersey and cutoff shorts. The look is adorable. I dislike her even more than I did this morning. “We’re playing capture the flag. You in?”

  “Ethan! Ethan!” My bunkmates chant. Behind them, Dirk and a few guys from the other boys’ bunk are tossing a football.

  Ethan’s eyes meet mine. “Want to play?”

  I shake my head. “As much as it kills me, I think I’ll sit this one out,” I quip.

  “You’re going to play though, right?” Kyle asks Lina.

  “Of course!” She looks at me and hesitates. “If that’s okay with you.”

  “Go!” I tell her. “I’m going to get a drink and look for marshmallows. Roasting one sounds just my speed about now.”

  “Save me one,” Ethan says, and then he and Lina jog over to meet the others.

  The afternoon goes quicker than I would imagine an afternoon in the middle of nowhere with no technology would be. I manage to calm down a bit about the bug situation, and Cole stirs up the boy-versus-girl bunk rivalry again with a nasty game of dodgeball that ends with Melody getting a fat lip. That keeps her from joining us on the lake for a jump on one of those giant inflatable trampolines. I shock everyone by staying on longer than anyone (I don’t reveal that Kyle and I have done this before in Cabo San Lucas). I don’t even notice dusk approaching because I’m enjoying my hamburger so much. They really do taste better on a charcoal grill! Then Thomas lights the campfire, and Hitch tells a story in the form of Mad Libs, where we each contribute a word. Dirk does one completely on his own, and the result is so hilarious I almost spit out my lemonade all over Kyle and Lina. We play for so long that it takes me a minute to realize what is happening when people get up from the campfire and start to turn in. That’s when my heart starts to pound again.

  “Ready for bed?” Lina asks through a half yawn.

  I put another marshmallow on my stick and place the end in the dwindling fire. “Um… I’ll be there in a minute. I’m still hungry.”

  She nods and heads to our tent, which looks perfectly nice, if you like tents.

  I sit quietly and watch the campers disperse around me. Courtney is still sitting on the other edge of the fire with Sam, their heads close as they talk softly. Cole is helping someone find a lantern so they can head out to the “bathroom” in the dark while Thomas and Hitch secure the camp for the night. I can hear Jeanie, Camilla, Melody, and Addison, who squeezed into a tent made for two, giggling across the way. Vickie and Trisha are in the tent next to theirs, which is next to the guys from Thomas’s bunk. I stare at the crackling fire and lose myself in the amber colors, which are making me sleepy. I feel a tap on my shoulder.

  “Ethan!” I jump. “Hey.”

  “Hey.” He crouches down next to me, looking like he’s about to make a break for it. If he is, he’s taking me with him. “What do you think of your first campout?”

  “It hasn’t been as bad as I thought it would be,” I admit.

  “Are you turning in?” Ethan asks.

  I resist the urge to bite my nails in front of him. “I’m going to wait it out a bit. I still have some s’mores left to eat.”

  He half grins. “Haven’t you eaten like a dozen?”

  “Maybe.” I act indignant. “Who’s counting?”

  He shakes his head. “Again, not what I’d expect from someone who sits with girls who eat salad with fat-free dressing at lunch.”

  “You’re the one who said the beauty of camp is being yourself,” I tease. “I’m being true to me, and I have decided I really like s’mores.”

  He offers me his hand. “I think I’ve found something you’ll like even better. Come with me.”

  I wonder if he’s letting me sleep in his tent so he can protect me against spiders. My cheeks flush at the thought.

  “Just taking a bathroom run,” Ethan says to Thomas and Hitch when we walk past them. They’re too involved to even reply. Most of the campers have already gone to their tents. I can see their lanterns glowing and the shadows of people inside talking. Ethan moves in the opposite direction of our campsite and heads into the darkness. I tug on his arm.

  “Are you sure you know where we’re going?” I try to keep the panic out of my voice. I’m not sure it’s working.

  “Yep, just a few feet farther.” He waves the lantern in front of him to light the way. “There it is.” He shines the light on a tree, and I see a ladder. “Start climbing.”

  “Where are we?” I ask, but Ethan is already on the way up. I have no choice but to follow or be swallowed up by the darkness around us. The sounds of the forest seem louder than they were at the campfire. I hear an owl hoot in the distance, and the hair on my arms stands up. I can still see the glow of the tents, so we’re not that far away, but it’s pitch-black out here. I’ve only climbed a few feet when I feel Ethan grab my hand again.

  “You’ve reached the top. Just pull yourself up.”

  “The top?” I pull myself onto a platform and look around in awe. “It’s a tree house!”

  “It’s been here for years,” Ethan says. He places his lantern on the floor, and the light fills up the tiny space. The cabin is entirely made of wood and has a low roof and a few windows from which I can see the campfire perfectly. “They used to use it as a lookout when they did camping trips out here more often. We used it last year when we were doing a Color War game, so I remembered it when you were freaking out.”

  Freaking out is kind of a harsh term… but true.

  “I needed a few minutes to find it, but when I did and saw it was fine, I thought I’d bring you here.” Ethan’s smile has an amber glow to it in the lantern light. “Beats sleeping on the hard ground with spiders, doesn’t it?”

  Ethan went looking for this place just for me. I’m incredibly touched and not sure what to say. Maybe he doesn’t think I’m Camping Barbie after all. Could he actually like me back? “Am I allowed to stay up here?”

  He shrugs. “I don’t see why not. I was thinking of going back down and telling Lina where you are though. She can bring back your sleeping bags, but you can hold on to my lantern. I brought a flashlight with me to get back. Just get to your tent before breakfast, which, I warn you, will be early. People rise with the sun on these trips.”

/>   “Don’t use my sleep mask. Got it.” The space is cozy and feels secure from a bear attack. Or a yeti. If you believe in those sorts of things. I realize Ethan is staring at me, waiting for me to say something. “Thanks for finding this for me, Ethan,” I say shyly. “If you hadn’t, I probably would have eaten myself sick on s’mores all night.”

  “And thrown up the whole hike back,” Ethan says. “I’m really saving myself.” He heads over to the ladder and pulls out his flashlight. I watch him throw his legs over the side. “So you’ll be okay up here?” His eyes are searching. “Until I send Lina back?”

  I smile. “I think I’ll be just fine.”

  And for the first time since I came to the Pines, I really mean it.

  Harper McAllister @HarperMc

  Seeing my first sunrise from a tree house. #survivingthesummer

  14

  IF YOU’RE HAPPY AND YOU KNOW IT

  “NICE SHIRT,” KYLE SAYS WHEN I run into him.

  I look down at my new-and-improved Whispering Pines tee as campers in boring identical red shirts file into the Pines Theater around us. We’re on our way to All-Camp Night. Lanterns cast a cool glow on my shirt in the evening light. “Thanks! It gives it a little something extra, don’t you think?”

  I got bored when it rained all day yesterday, so I bedazzled the camp logo on my tee with silver rhinestones, fringed the bottom, and added sparkly beads. Lina wanted hers done just like mine, and it came out so awesome that Trisha, Vickie, and Addison asked me to fix up theirs, too. This started a war with Jeanie and Camilla, who couldn’t help stating—loudly—that the shirt looked ridiculous and we were going to get in trouble for tampering with the tee. Then Addison went to the camp rule book and snippily said there was nothing in it about tee tampering, and we all started arguing about camp wear, which turned into a fight about Color War.

  It was a long day.

  I wouldn’t admit this to Mom in my e-mail last night, but my time here has gone quicker than I imagined. I can’t believe that in two Saturdays, McDaddy’ll be here to pick me up.