Fall in Love
Page 327
Oh boy.
--- ~ ---
Jason stood at the front of the church, watching as the girls made their way down the aisle. He smiled at each of his cousins, in turn, and then at Amber.
Then…his heart slammed in his chest as Katie glided down the aisle, moving effortlessly, looking like she was walking on a cloud.
What was it about Katie Lawson that caused the whole world to disappear every time she was in the room?
What was it that made him care about nothing but seeing her smile every time he saw that gorgeous face?
Damn.
Jason made a decision right then and there. He had known that he and Katie were going to have to talk, put their cards on the table, but he’d been trying to be patient. Wait for the right time. Well, time was up. He was talking to Katie. Tonight.
About the weeks that Nick was in the hospital. About the night of Nick's funeral. About the ten years in between.
Because…damn. Just damn. There was no way Jason could survive another ten years without Katie in his life and it was time she knew that.
Chapter Twenty
Katie leaned back in her chair at the rehearsal dinner. She was surrounded by Chelle and the Sloan girls, and for the past hour had only suffered from passing thoughts of angsty talks with Jason. She was having more fun than she could remember having since…well, since the last time she'd hung out with Chelle and the Sloan girls.
But just as Katie thought she was enjoying a moment of non-Jason-obsession bliss, Chelle leaned over and said, “So I notice that a certain sexy Sloan brother has not been able to take his eyes off of you all night. Spoiler Alert: I don't mean Alex or Bobby.”
“I don't know what you’re talking about,” Katie said with a shrug.
“I’m talking about Jason,” Chelle clarified dryly.
Katie couldn’t help but smile. “Yeah, I got that.”
Chelle’s eyes danced with amusement. “Sorry. You said you didn't know what I was talking about, so I thought I better spell it out. Jason can’t stop looking at you.”
Katie shook her head, and tried not to blush. “It’s not like that.”
Chelle eyes widened. “Oh, really?”
“Yes. Really.” Katie confirmed quietly, hoping her friend would drop it before any of the other girls at the table picked up on their conversation.
She should have known better.
Instead of picking up on Katie’s not-so-subtle cues, Chelle smiled as she suggested, “Well, then let's do what all the great scientific minds do when they want to test a hypothesis.”
“Bust out a beaker and fire up the hot plate?” Katie asked.
“I think you're confusing freshman chem with great scientific minds, but, yes—the same principal. I propose an experiment.”
Katie knew that trying to derail the Chelle-train once it had left the station was a losing battle and decided the path of least resistance would probably be the way to go. “What do you have in mind?”
“Well, he's looking over here every few seconds. Let's just pick a random point in time and then start counting. I propose that we will not get past five before he has to feed his Katie-glancing addiction.”
“Oh my gosh. This is ridiculous.” Katie felt her cheeks heat as her lips pulled up in a smile.
“No. It’s not. Those peepers of his are hooked on some Katie Lawson. They're jonesin', man.”
Katie shook her head again, feeling uncomfortable with all the attention, and secretly praying that Chelle was right.
Chelle’s eyes narrowed as she said, “Okay, starting…now! 1…2…3…”
On 3, as if he had been programmed to, Jason gave a little glance their way. When he saw that they were looking at him, he raised his glass and his mouth turned up in his signature panty melting sexy smile. Tingles spread through Katie’s entire body at his gaze.
Hoping that she was hiding her reaction she raised her glass, at the same time Chelle did, back to him. Under her breath Chelle said, “Told you.” Miraculously the girls managed to display enough good manners to keep themselves from doubling over with laughter until they had turned back around.
Katie definitely had not had this much fun in a very long time.
Sophie walked up to them, face flushed and glowing. She said, “Hello, lovelies. Wow, looks like you’re having a good time.”
Chelle and Katie both stood to hug Sophie and assured her that they were, indeed, having a great time.
“Oh, good,” Sophie replied as Chelle and Katie both sat back down. “Well, you girls keep having fun. I'm heading to bed so I can be nice and rested for the big day tomorrow.”
Katie sprung up out of her seat again. “Oh, I'll go with you, sweetie.”
“No, no,” Sophie replied a little too quickly. “I mean, that would be silly. I'm just going to sleep. I do that without help all the time, you know?”
There was a very suspicious blush creeping up Sophie's cheeks, so Katie decided to just drop it. “Okay, Sophiebell, but you know you can call me if you need anything. I've got my cell on.”
“Oh, I know. I won't need anything. See you at brunch.” Sophie said then turned and made an exit that would have left the Road Runner in the dust.
Before the door to the dining room had even shut from Sophie leaving, Chelle nudged Katie and motioned over to Bobby who was saying quick goodbyes and then heading out, too.
Chelle said, “Look at those two, sneaking off together. She’s going to sleep, my ass. She might be going to bed, but I don’t think she’ll be sleeping.”
Katie smiled. “Awe, I think it’s romantic.”
“You think what’s romantic?” Jason’s deep voice sounded behind her and every fiber of her being came alive with awareness. What was going on with her? She’d never been this sexually charged.
Chelle, thankfully, must have seen that Katie was not going to be keeping up her end of the conversation and explained smoothly, “Your brother and soon-to-be sister-in-law sneaking off together the night before their wedding.”
“Yeah, they weren’t too stealth about that little maneuver,” Jason laughed as he brushed his hand over Katie’s shoulder.
“Nope,” Katie was, gratefully, able to get out, even with the chills running down her arms from the roughened pad of Jason’s thumb grazing the base of her neck.
Jason gave her shoulder a squeeze as he asked, “Hey, Kit Kat, you want to go take a walk?”
His voice was deep and gravelly and Katie felt its effect shoot right between her legs. She tried to focus on the words he’d said, which was easier said than done, with the powerful arousal that was short-circuiting her senses.
Jason had asked to take a walk. Katie’s stomach began to do somersaults. She felt her palms moisten. Her breathing began to get ragged. She quickly felt inside her clutch to check that she had, in fact, brought her trusty in-case-of-emergency paper bag and was relieved to find that she had.
“Yep, sounds good,” she managed to reply over the large lump that had formed in her throat.
She felt herself being pulled into Chelle’s arms as she whispered in her ear, “You’re good. It’s just Jason. Just talk to him.”
Katie nodded against Chelle’s shoulder and gave her one last squeeze before standing and heading out.
As they were walking out of the dining room, she asked Jason, “Do you think we need to tell anyone we’re leaving?”
It was a stalling tactic, she freely admitted to herself.
“I think they’ll figure it out. I have my cell, if they need anything,” Jason said with a wink.
Jason reached out and intertwined his fingers in Katie’s as they stepped into the outdoor courtyard, which was lit up by twinkle lights. Katie shivered as they walked outside, partly from the drop in temperature, but mostly from the intense crackling of electricity she felt between herself and Jason.
Of course, Jason picked up on the slight tremor, since it seemed he noticed everything about Katie. He let go of her hand just long enoug
h to take off his sports coat and wrap it around her shoulders.
She pulled it in front of her and he rested his hand on the small of her back as they made their way through the expansive garden area.
His thumb was rubbing small circles, and even through the jacket and her dress, his touch felt intimate.
Katie had no idea why she was so nervous. She had planned on asking Jason to talk anyway, so she should be prepared for this…but she wasn’t.
They walked in silence until they came to a small bench in front of a waterfall feature. As they sat, Katie turned to face Jason. She was just about to speak but he beat her to it.
“Katie…”
Uh-oh, she thought. No nickname. This must be serious.
“I just want you to know how sorry I am—” he began.
“It’s fine, Jas,” she interrupted.
“No, it’s not. In fact, I can’t believe I did what I did. I would completely understand if you couldn’t forgive me.” He looked so sincere, and it tugged at Katie’s heartstrings.
“Jas, really, it’s fine,” she assured him. “I was upset at first, but I've been thinking, and I talked it through with Chelle, and I'm over it. Honestly. I mean, it’s not like you were the one who cheated on me. You just didn’t tell me.”
Jason’s brow furrowed. “What?”
“It’s really not your fault,” she continued, patting his hand. “I was just upset and you were there. I really just needed to process it. But you don’t have to apologize.”
He caught her hand mid-pat and held it firmly. “I’m not apologizing for not telling you about Nick cheating on you, Katie. I’m apologizing for what happened the night of Nick’s funeral.”
Katie felt her head start spinning. She tried to push past it and do what she should have done ten years ago. Words flew out of her mouth like they were being shot from a cannon, “You don’t… Why are you… I should be… I’m the one who’s sorry…”
She stopped and took a deep breath, closing her eyes against all of the crashing emotions that were pounding against her heart and her head. When she felt that she had herself under control, she opened them again and tried to collect her thoughts.
She decided to give her speech another try. “I'm the one who should be apologizing to you for that night. And I am…I mean, I wanted to…”
She paused. Another deep breath and another crack at it. “Jas, I'm so sorry for what happened that night. I’m sorry for you finding me in the tub and…and after when, you know…we…you know. And then I just left.”
She felt tears starting to form in her eyes. She took another deep breath. She could do this.
“Katie, don’t. It’s my fault. You didn’t do any—”
She interrupted again “Please, Jas, just let me finish. I just need to get out what I have wanted and needed to say to you all these years.”
Jason’s gorgeous brown eyes were brimming with emotion but he nodded his head, gesturing for her to continue.
Katie lifted her hand and wiped her eyes before proceeding. “I’m not the kind of girl who hooks up with guys randomly. I don’t do that. I don’t know what happened. I just…I felt like I needed…I mean, you felt so…warm and…”
Her cheeks now felt like they were on fire. She dropped her head in her hands. This was not coming out the way she wanted it to. Why did she feel like she was back in high school? Where was the confidence she always had when she stepped into a mediation or courtroom?
“Can I say something?” Jason’s soothing voice asked as he rubbed the small of her back.
Katie nodded, not taking her face from her hands. When he did not continue, however, she cautiously looked up at him. His milk chocolate brown eyes were pooled with warmth, and Katie felt like she could drown in them.
“I know you’re not ‘that kind of girl.’ I know that night was your first time.”
“How do you know that?” Katie felt a panic begin to rise inside of her. She had believed that was a carefully guarded secret. Everyone had always assumed that she and Nick were sexually active and she’d never told anyone otherwise. Her mom had even had her go on the pill when she was sixteen.
“Because since Nick was doing, well, whatever he was doing, I made him promise me one thing—that he wouldn’t be sleeping with you at the same time,” Jason explained, his tone even and calm. “I just wanted to protect you.”
Jason paused for a moment before he added with frustration in his voice, “Then I turn out to be the asshole who takes advantage of you. I don’t know if you can ever forgive me. I know that’s why you left and haven’t been back.”
He raked his hands through his hair, and his voice sounded nothing short of tortured. He looked so full of guilt and shame, and Katie knew he that didn’t deserve to feel any of those things.
Time to step up and clear the air once and for all.
She sat a little straighter, trying to build up her confidence even though she felt none forthcoming. It didn’t matter though. She needed to face this. She had to let Jason off the hook he had apparently placed himself on.
Taking a deep breath she figured, Here goes nothing.
“Jason, look. I am so sorry that you have been carrying around some misplaced guilt about that night. I am also very sorry that I didn’t stay and meet you at the Dairy Queen. I'm sorry that I stopped talking to you when Nick was in his coma. I’m sorry that I didn’t fly home the second I heard about your dad’s heart attack. I’m sorry that I disappeared from everyone’s lives for ten years.”
Tears started falling down her cheeks as she continued on a roll, “God. I’m so sorry for a lot of things, Jas. But there is one thing that I am absolutely not sorry for. I am not sorry that you were my first. I will never be sorry for that.”
Katie knew that it was time to fess up to something that until this moment she’d never truly come to terms with. “When my mom woke me up on the night of the accident”—Katie swallowed hard—“she said that she had taken a 911 call about a black Chevy truck that had driven off Spencer Point.”
She took another deep breath and shook her head at the awful memory. “I thought it was you, Jason. I thought you were in the truck. And then when my mom told me it was Nick…” Katie felt tears pouring down her face. She quickly wiped them but forged ahead as she did so. “I felt… Oh, God, I mean, I was…relieved that it was Nick and not you in the truck.
“That’s why I stopped talking to you, why I couldn’t even look at you when we were at the hospital. I felt so guilty about that. And when you found me in the bathtub, I tried to tell you, to explain that I had thought it had been you. I hadn’t slept in days, though, and I know I wasn’t making much sense. But when I said that night that I needed you, that I wanted you…I knew exactly what I was asking, and it was exactly what I wanted. And who I wanted.”
Jason brushed away more of the tears that were still flowing freely down Katie's face.
“But then we got interrupted, and I just… I couldn’t face you. I had no idea what you must have thought of me. I had to get away. I couldn’t even face myself for the feelings I had. I was confused and scared and devastated over losing Nick. It was just too much.”
“Katie.” At the primal growl in Jason’s voice, tingles spread through Katie’s body.
She looked into his eyes, and where there had been warmth just a few minutes ago, there was now hunger, desire.
He leaned close so that his forehead was resting on hers, and his breathing was ragged and warm against her damp cheek. Cupping her face in his large hands he spoke low, “I know that we have a lot more to talk about, but right now all I can think about is how much I need you. We've both been carrying around all kinds of misplaced guilt, confusion, and pain about that night. Please let me take you upstairs so I can make it right, make us right. Please, Katie… I need you.”
He slid his fingers through her hair at the nape of her neck and tilted her head slightly. As he did, his lips covered hers. Heat rapidly spread through her.
Slipping her arms around his neck and gliding her fingers through his soft brown hair—that hair she had always loved—at the same time he was wrapping his strong arms around her, pulling her closer, crushing her body against his chest. She felt tiny in his arms, like a china doll when compared to his overpowering strength.
When Katie was in his arms, she felt that there was no danger in the world, no power, no destructive force that was strong enough to hurt her. Not when Jas was there, encircling her in his protective hold. It was the sexiest feeling in the world, she realized, to feel that loved and cherished and protected. In a flash of clarity, Katie knew that there was nothing Jas would not do for her, and that triggered a primal reaction in her—to do absolutely anything for him.
His soft but firm lips moved against hers, his hunger matching what she felt inside, his passion rising up to meet hers. The intensifying waves of heat exploding from her core came faster as the pace of his movements increased, their mutual need stoking the flames of their feelings for each other, their desires.
Her body felt like it was made of nerve endings. Every tiny move he made against her—every brush of his skin against her skin—lit her up like a wildfire burning across a dry and thirsty plain. Every sensation felt like it would overtake her, every one felt more intense and pleasurable than the last, and then (although it seemed impossible) the next one would be even more pleasurable still.
He slipped his tongue into her mouth, probing, exploring, and she met it with her own. She pulled him closer with her hands tangled in his hair, thrusting her tongue into his mouth, grinding her lips against his as she ground her hips into his thigh where their bodies met.
Just when she thought that the fire of her lust-filled passion could not be stoked any higher, he rose slightly, causing his chest to move against her, grazing her nipples all the way.