Promise Me Love (Harlequin Treasury 1990's)

by Jennifer Taylor

  Fury rose inside her, hot and swift, and she stood up quickly, ignoring the startled look Maggie gave her. ‘If you don’t mind, Maggie, I’ll skip breakfast. I’ve gone off the idea. I think I’ll go out and get some fresh air.’

  ‘Well...yes...of course.’ Maggie glanced round the kitchen, her gaze centring on David. ‘Why don’t you and David walk down to the village? He can show you around.’

  ‘No!’ The refusal was far sharper than she’d intended and she felt David’s eyes on her, but she refused to look at him. ‘I’m sure David has things he wants to do. I’ll be fine by myself.’

  She turned defiantly to him, a shiver running down her spine when she saw the icy displeasure in his eyes, but there was little sign of his true feelings in his voice. ‘I do have a few phone calls to make.’ He glanced at Matthew, his face set. ‘I take it that you don’t have any objections to my using the phone in the study?’

  Matthew stared back at him. ‘This is as much your house as mine, so help yourself. One of the things we need to discuss this weekend is what we’re going to do with the house now that Mother has decided to stay on the coast.’

  David shrugged. ‘Frankly, I don’t give a damn what happens to it. It holds no place in my affections.’

  Matthew smiled grimly. ‘Then at least we agree on one thing. I’ll make arrangements to have it sold when we move out if you’re agreeable.’

  ‘The sooner the better as far as I’m concerned. It will be one less link with the past.’ He met and held Matthew’s gaze, his face unrelenting, and Beth felt her heart ache. It was all going wrong, one thing after another, even her and Maggie’s well-meaning attempts to patch things up. It wasn’t going to be simple to end this bitter feud and wipe out the past, but when was it ever simple to do that? The past always had a huge influence on future events, as she herself was finding out. If she hadn’t needed it so desperately David would never have helped her in the first place and she now wouldn’t find herself in this intolerable position. She wanted to make their marriage real for any number of reasons, ones she wasn’t brave enough to admit to as yet, but she was afraid to take that step when everything hinged on the past. If she and David had met under different circumstances how would their relationship have progressed?

  There was no answer to that question so she made her way slowly from the room and along the hall, stopping abruptly when a hand closed around her arm.

  ‘And what did you think you were playing at just now? I warned you earlier to watch what you said, Beth, and I meant it. I won’t countenance you making me look like a fool in front of Matthew!’

  David’s fingers were bruising on her flesh, but Beth scarcely felt them as anger rose in her again. ‘If anyone is making you look a fool then it’s you! What are you trying to prove, David...that we have the perfect loving marriage?’ She dragged her arm away, glaring defiantly at him. ‘Well, carry on with your little game if that’s what you want to do, but don’t expect me to applaud your efforts. You make me sick with your lies.’

  ‘I don’t give a damn what you feel. What I do or don’t do is none of your concern. I gave you a home, Beth, and a job when you needed them most, but what I didn’t give you was a licence to pass judgement on how I conduct my life!’

  ‘So in return for a roof over my head I have to do as I’m told, is that it?’ She shook her head, the silky hair swirling like golden fire against the white shirt. ‘I won’t do that. I won’t perpetuate this lie in front of people like Maggie who have invited me into their home!’

  ‘I don’t see that you have that much choice. It would be a simple enough matter to end our arrangement, Beth. I wonder how you would manage then...with no job and no place to live? How do you think you would cope out in that hostile world all alone?’

  There was anger on his face, but it wasn’t greater than she felt. How dared he say that? How dared he threaten her?

  ‘I’d manage, David. I would manage just fine. I don’t need your charity any longer. I should have left before, the last time you laid your cards on the table and told me exactly what you feel about me!’ She laughed bitterly. ‘I have to hand it to you: I was almost tempted to fall in with your suggestion about turning this farce into the real thing, but thank God I didn’t. I’ve made some mistakes recently, but that would have been the biggest one I could have made! Now all I have to do is pack my things when we get back to town tomorrow night and call it quits.’

  She turned and ran up the stairs, leaving him standing there. When she reached the top, something made her look back, and she felt her stomach sink when she caught a movement at the far end of the hall. Her eyes met Maggie’s horrified gaze for a moment before she turned away, hardening her heart. She didn’t give a damn what anyone thought. From here on in she was going to look after herself. Once she’d left David’s flat tomorrow then that would be end of it all, one more bitter lesson to add to the others she had learnt recently.

  CHAPTER NINE

  IT WAS further to the village than Beth had expected so that by the time she rounded the last bend she was trembling from exertion. She paused for a moment to catch her breath, then forced herself to go on, feigning an interest in the few shops which lined the narrow street.

  She stopped at the baker’s and bought a fresh roll still warm from the oven then sat down on a bench overlooking the village green and ate it, but it was too cold to linger there for long. The wind had risen since she’d left the house, sending needle-sharp blasts of cold air into her face, and with a weary sigh she started back up the road again. When it suddenly started to rain she could have wept.

  Head bowed against the icy drops, she struggled on, forcing herself to concentrate on getting back rather than on the lump of misery lodged deep in her chest. Now all her anger had faded all she felt was a numbing kind of pain that it should have to end like this. When a car skidded to a halt alongside her, she barely spared it a glance, then felt her heart stop when she recognised the man who jumped out and came round to confront her.

  ‘What the hell are you playing at, woman? Look at you! You’re soaked through. Come on.’ David caught her arm to propel her towards the car, but she resisted with a strength that surprised them both.

  ‘No! Go away. I can manage by myself. I don’t need your help, David Kane...not now...not ever!’

  She pushed past him, her breath coming in laboured spurts as she hurried along the road. She hated him! Hated him for being so domineering, hated him for imagining that she would accept his help again after what he’d said before, hated him for giving her hope only to snatch it away again.

  ‘And what do you hope to achieve by this display of independence? All you’ll do is tire yourself out and get a good soaking into the bargain.’

  She hadn’t realised he had followed her and now she rounded on him, brushing the rain from her face. ‘Go away! I don’t need your company, thank you.’

  He pushed his hands into his pockets, hunching his shoulders against the driving force of the rain. ‘I’m sure you don’t, but you’re getting it anyway.’ He looked grimly at the leaden sky, narrowing his eyes against the downpour. ‘Looks as if we’re both going to get soaked.’

  ‘You don’t need to! You can get in your car and drive back to the house. I can manage by myself.’

  He shook his head, scattering raindrops as he did so. ‘No way. If you’re going to walk then so am I.’

  His face was set with determination as he walked along beside her and Beth felt herself waver. She was wet through and freezing cold so how must David feel without a coat on? She skimmed a look over the sweat-shirt he was wearing, seeing the way the soft fabric was starting to cling to his chest, outlining the hard, lean muscles. Just for a moment time rolled back to the morning, when she had stroked those muscles, smoothed her hands over his skin, and she swallowed hard.

  He must have caught her look because he raised a quizzical eyebrow, shivering slightly as the wind sent an icy blast straight at them, and Beth sighed.

/>   ‘This is ridiculous. You’re going to catch pneumonia without a coat on.’

  He slowed and unconsciously Beth did so too. ‘So I catch pneumonia. Why should that matter to you, Beth?’ His voice was deep and seductive—deliberately so, she knew—but she couldn’t prevent the tremor which ran through her like fire through tinder. She licked her parched lips, feeling the tremor deepen when she saw the way his eyes followed the movement of her tongue.

  He moved closer, his eyes strangely intent as he repeated the question. ‘Why should it matter to you what happens to me, Beth? You told me before that you wanted nothing more to do with me. Have you changed your mind?’

  The wind carried the scent of his damp skin into her nostrils, a scent that she had come to know over the past few weeks. That was the trouble: she knew David so intimately in some respects yet knew him not at all in anything that mattered. How could they have hoped to maintain any sort of relationship when half of the picture was blank?

  She shook her head, staring up at him with sad eyes. ‘I haven’t changed my mind. Once we get back tomorrow I’m leaving.’

  ‘And where will you go?’ He moved in front of her, sheltering her against the wind with his own body. ‘You have no place to live, so what do you intend to do?’ He laughed suddenly. ‘Funny, isn’t it? You’re worried about me catching cold and I’m worried about how you’ll manage. That hardly sounds like two people who don’t give a damn about each other!’

  ‘You would feel the same about anyone, David! It’s not me you’re really concerned about.’

  ‘No? How do you work that out?’ He moved closer again, reaching out to steady her as a gust of wind made her stagger. Beth felt his hands close around her shoulders, felt the firm, hard warmth of his fingers even through the thick layer of her coat, and her heart seemed to stop.

  She loved him. The realisation settled into her mind, carried on the wind, dropping with the rain, so quiet and so natural, yet filling her with its very magnitude. She loved David so much, loved him with a depth and intensity which made her finally admit that it was no new emotion. Slowly, as the days had slid into weeks, love had grown, yet she could never admit it to him. The one thing he didn’t want from her was that.

  She drew away, her face set as she held back the grief tearing at her heart. ‘You are a compassionate man, David. You would have helped anyone in similar circumstances.’

  He shook his head, his mouth curling into a faint smile. ‘I can’t imagine ever offering marriage to any other woman, Beth, even if her circumstances had been the same as yours. It was you I asked to marry...only you that I would have asked.’

  She wanted to believe him so much, but there were so many things to consider that she was afraid to take what he said at face value even though her heart begged her to do so. ‘Why? Why did you really marry me, David? Oh, I can accept that you wanted to help me, but marriage...’ The wind whipped her hair into her face and impatiently she brushed it back. ‘I fitted in with your plans somehow, but I’ve still no idea where or how! If you won’t tell me the truth, David, then there is no way we can carry on like this.’

  His face closed up, growing cold and distant in that way she’d come to hate. ‘Why not accept the fact that I did what I did with the very best of intentions? My reasons don’t affect you or our relationship, Beth.’

  ‘Don’t affect me? Oh, come on! I want the truth, David, once and for all. I know it has some bearing on this weekend and this feud with your brother and I want to know what it is. I am sick and tired of being left in the dark like this!’

  ‘You know all that I am prepared to tell you. That will have to suffice.’

  ‘Will it? Will it, indeed? I’m afraid it doesn’t.’ She gave a bitter little laugh and turned to walk back towards the car. ‘We may as well go back to the house. We’re getting nowhere standing here in the rain. Nothing has changed, David. I still intend to leave tomorrow. I’ve had all I can take of these half-truths.’

  He caught her up, walking silently along beside her. He unlocked the car door and waited for her to get in, then slid behind the wheel, but made no attempt to start the engine. Beth wiped a hand over her wet face, her heart aching as she saw the bleakness of his expression. What right did she have to push him into telling her things he was obviously loath to tell? She wanted to be a part of his life, but there was no way she could make him accept her as such if he didn’t chose to.

  It took only minutes to get back to the house. David stopped the car in the drive, his hands tightening on the steering-wheel before he turned to her. ‘You asked for an explanation and maybe you are right, Beth. Maybe it is time that I told you what went on.’

  She’d waited for so long to hear what had happened, yet now she felt a sudden irrational fear that the truth might be the last thing she would want to know. She shivered convulsively, wishing desperately that she had never pressured him. ‘It must be your decision, David.’

  ‘I don’t think it is that any longer. I think it’s more a question of what’s right now. You have to know, Beth, because it could affect any decisions you make as to your future.’

  The fear grew and she shivered again, feeling cold to the very depths. He noticed at once, his eyes darkening in concern as he laid the back of his hand against her cheek. ‘You’re absolutely frozen. Let’s get inside. We can talk once you’re warm and dry.’

  He helped her from the car and unlocked the front door, standing aside while Beth walked into the dark hall. Shrugging off her wet coat, she went to hang it on the hallstand then gasped in alarm as her foot skidded on a pool of water that had dripped on to the tiled floor.

  ‘Beth!’ His hands were firm and sure as he caught her and held her close. Beth gave a shaky little laugh, turning her startled face up to his, then felt all the laughter die as she saw the gleam in his eyes just a moment before his mouth captured hers in a searing kiss.

  Joy flooded through her, filling her with strength. No matter what David told her it wouldn’t change the way she felt about him. She loved him with her heart, her soul, with every fibre of her being, and once he had finished his tale then she would tell him that. From here on in there would be no lies between them, no veils pulled over the truth.

  When he moved his mouth from hers she let her head rest against his shoulder in a loving, trusting gesture, then started nervously as she caught sight of Maggie standing in the door to the sitting-room.

  ‘Sorry. I didn’t mean to intrude, but I must say that I am glad to see that you’ve made up. I was worried about you both.’ She smiled, a faintly nervous smile for a woman who was usually so confident, making Beth realise that what she’d said had been the truth. Maggie had been worried, strangely so, but why? Why should it bother her so much that Beth and David had quarrelled so bitterly.

  Beth glanced up at David, seeking an answer, then went cold when she saw the calculated expression on his face. She drew away from him abruptly, ice settling into her heart. She’d not noticed Maggie when she’d come in, but had he? Had he seen the other woman standing there and decided to deliberately allay her obvious fears with that kiss? He’d spoken of telling her the truth, but which was more important to him—the truth or this pretence about their marriage?

  She didn’t want to believe it, but, once planted, the seeds of suspicion grew. She turned away abruptly and started up the stairs, wanting only to get away from this web of deceit.

  ‘Oh, before I forget, David, there was a phone call for you. The number is on the pad and the man who phoned said that it was urgent that you contact him.’

  David nodded, turning towards the study. ‘Thanks, Maggie. I’ll phone him back right away. Is there any chance of you making Beth some tea? She’s soaked.’

  ‘Of course. Right away.’ Maggie hurried off, obviously relieved to have something to do. David waited until the kitchen door closed behind her then looked at Beth, who had stopped halfway up the stairs. ‘I’ll be up as soon as I’m through with making this call. We’ll tal
k then, Beth. All right?’

  Beth nodded, avoiding his eyes as she hurried up the stairs. She should have told him not to bother, not to waste his time thinking up more lies, but it seemed too much effort. She went into the bedroom and stripped off her wet clothes, then dressed quickly in dry trousers and a fluffy pale blue sweater before sitting down in front of the mirror to dry her hair. For a moment she paused to study her reflection, staring intently at the familiar features. She wasn’t beautiful, but she was pretty enough. How did David see her?

  She closed her eyes, trying to imagine what he saw, but it was impossible. All she could picture in her mind’s eye was the expression on his face as he’d watched Maggie across the hall. Was he merely playing her for a fool? Promising to tell her the truth, but planning on yet more lies? It seemed more than likely, but he wasn’t going to get away with it. She’d played the role of fool before with bitter consequences and there was no way she was going to play it again, no matter how much she might love him!

  There was fire in her eyes when he came into the room, but he never noticed as he pulled fresh trousers and a sweater out of the wardrobe. Beth watched him in silence then put the hairbrush down. ‘Is there something wrong?’

  He dragged the sweater over his head then finger-combed his damp hair into place. ‘Unfortunately, yes. That damned delivery I spent the best part of yesterday waiting for has just arrived. I’ll have to go and let them unload it.’

  ‘Now? But can’t it wait until next week?’

  ‘No. It’s vital that I have the wood for Monday so that we can start on a special order. I’ve been waiting months for this consignment, but there’s been one hitch after another. If I turn it away now then heaven knows when they’ll make a second delivery.’ He emptied the change from his pockets and picked up his keys. ‘I’m sorry about this, Beth. I’ll be back as soon as I can.’