“No shit?” Her hand ran to cover her mouth as he frowned at her. “Sorry! It slipped out.”
“Hmm. Let’s see, perhaps instead of spanking I could come up with some other way to punish you. I’m going to think on it. For now, I’m going to let that little slip up go.” He tapped the end of the pen on the tip of her nose. “Please try harder. It’s so unsuitable for you to curse.”
“I know. Sorry. It’s just I have a hard time believing what you’re saying. My mind can be conditioned to orgasm with just a word?”
His finger ran over her bottom lip. His dark eyes danced.
“You’d be surprised what all our minds can do, Steele. Now is that a thing you think you can and want to do?”
“It sounds kind of exciting so yes.” She smiled and giggled. “This is kind of exciting too.”
He smiled.
“Glad you find it that way. Now how about sex in public places?”
Steele’s eyes went wide, and she ran her hands over her arms as a chill went through her.
“That sounds kind of risky. I mean, I do want to be an attorney one day and a charge of public indecency wouldn’t look good for me or you for that matter.”
“That’s where you have to trust me, Steele. To make sure we don’t get caught. It’s part of the excitement.” His eyebrows raised, and he winked at her. “Trust is the main thing with this. You always need to trust that I won’t hurt you or do anything that would cause you to get into trouble.”
She smiled.
“Okay then, that’s a yes for that one then. I do trust you, Arsen. I honestly do.”
“Good. And always tell me if I’m really hurting you, Steele. Don’t do what I did when I was a sub and try to push yourself past your limits. With time you’ll build up to whatever your personal limits are. It’s about testing them, but not going past that. Honesty and trust are essential in the dom/sub relationship.” He pushed back a strand of her hair that had fallen over her face.
“You really are sweet, Arsen. Do you know that?” she asked as she searched his eyes.
“I never have been. Well, once a long time ago. You bring something out in me I thought was long gone, Steele. But you are right about me needing to keep the strength I’ve managed to build. I can’t go back to the young man I was.”
“It’s not even a thing I want. Your strength is very attractive. Your authority is also extremely attractive.” Her hand moved up his arm and squeezed his large bicep. “To be honest, the way you spank me, the first couple of licks anyway, send me into a wet, quivering mess.”
He looked down and smiled.
“So a couple of swats are good, but three is too many. Got it.” He wrote it down.
Steele leaned into his shoulder.
“And the way you bite me is good. That sends me over the edge.”
Arsen looked sheepish as he wrote that down.
“Biting is good. And now onto other points of business. Sharp objects. What do you think about those?”
“Like you’ll poke me with them?” Her expression was horrified.
“No, just run them over your skin. But it’s exciting, especially when you're blindfolded and have no idea of what the sharp object is and if I’m going to poke you with it or not. Especially if you move.”
“Oh, the trust thing again. Then okay. It does sound kind of intriguing.” She ran her hand over his thigh. “Arsen, can I touch you when I want to? I mean unless you specifically tell me not to.”
He sighed.
“You really like touching me and running your hands through my hair, don’t you?”
She nodded.
“I do. But I can take sometimes being held back from it. The frustration building is a thing I find I’m liking.”
“I’ll allow it more often then. And another thing I want to talk about is making love. I want us to do that as well.” He looked at her and seemed to be nervous. “It’s a thing I haven’t allowed myself to do since that day. The day Beth’s father caught us. I’ve built up a fear in my mind and I’d like to work through that. I trust you enough to try to do that with.”
Steele’s heart nearly burst.
“Of course, Arsen!” her arms went around him and she was almost shaking with the breakthrough.
It was beginning to happen. Arsen was letting her in and she would be able to help him heal from what the women did to hurt him. Now if she could help him find some evidence against Allen White everything would be falling into place for them.
ARSEN
After painstakingly writing their contract in a book which would hold the things they’d agreed on and the things he expected out of her, Arsen took the book and a legal contract to Steele as she sat in the living room.
“Here it is, only thing left to do is sign the contract.” He placed the three page stack of papers in front of her and handed her a pen. “You sign then I will.”
“And then we’ll really be bound by this?” she asked as she tapped the pen on the top of the coffee table.
“Yes. You will be bound to me and me alone.” He found himself nervous and nearly pulled the paper from her. But she seemed to need it.
She looked up at him and smiled.
“And you will be free to do who and what you want, right?”
He nodded and something inside him was telling him to stop her from signing it. Signing away herself to him.
She tapped her chin with the end of the pen.
“I have to trust you.” She signed the paper and moved it over to him and handed him the pen.
He signed it hastily. Arsen handed her the book.
“This is yours to keep. We’ll add things to it as we move along. It’s like a journal that will show our journey together. But it’s more than that.”
“Sounds romantic,” she said as she ran her hand over the leather cover. Gold embossed letters spelled out one word on the front of it, ‘Arsen’s.’
“It’s not. It’s a guide of what I expect from you. I’ll write certain sex acts. Perhaps draw positions I want you to become adept at. Add rules and even punishments as time goes along and I deem the additions necessary to get you to understand your position as my sub.”
“You may not think it romantic but I do, Arsen.” She held the book to her chest and hugged it to her.
She stood and reached out to touch him. He took a step back.
“Uh, uh. It starts now, Steele.”
A frown covered her face. “So what we’ve been doing is over?”
He nodded and turned away from her. “I’ll be in my office. I’m going to order you a new wardrobe. In that book, you’ll find the recipes for the meals I expect you to not only learn to cook, but make them to my satisfaction. If not edible then we’ll order out, but you won’t get to touch me at all until tomorrow.”
“My adjusted punishments are not being able to touch you rather than physical punishments?” she asked.
He nodded and walked away, leaving her to look through the book he’d left her with. So many pages were full, and she found it a bit overwhelming. She found the recipes and groaned as she was not a cook.
“I asked for this,” she said out loud to remind herself.
ARSEN
The chicken piccata recipe he’d written in the book was one of his favorites so when he heard Steele pounding away in the kitchen then smelled the delightful aroma of the chicken breasts cooking, he had to smile as he opened the door to his office.
Arsen had ordered her a complete wardrobe which would be delivered in a couple of days. He made his way down the hallway to the kitchen to peek in on her. He stifled a chuckle as he saw her with flour all over one cheek and the front of an apron she’d managed to find.
She blew a puff of air from her mouth to move a stray lock of hair which had gotten away from her ponytail. Her cheeks were pink with the heat of the stove she stood over.
After wiping the smile from his face he put on a stern look and cleared his throat. Steele jumped and spun around.
&
nbsp; “Arsen! You scared me!”
He tapped his watch.
“It’s five minutes late.”
She looked confused.
“What is? Dinner? No, it says it has to be ready at seven-thirty. I still have forty-five minutes.”
“Look on page eighteen and I’ll be in my office waiting. Every minute I have to wait is a minute you’ll have to wait before I allow you to touch me.” He turned and left, smiling all the way back to his office.
It was just a matter of time until Steele found she was not entirely ready for the submissive lifestyle. He sat at his desk and began researching safe cars for her. He was going to put her in the safest thing he could find.
The clothes and the car were things he wasn’t about to change in how he took care of her. His cell phone rang and when he picked it up his smile faded.
There it was, the San Francisco police department yet again.
“Arsen Sloan.”
A woman’s voice came through the phone.
“Hello, this is Detective Fontaine. I’ve been assigned to your case, Mr. Sloan. The other detective gave it up. I’ll need you to come and talk to me and give me your statement. Seems he misplaced the one that you gave him.”
The woman on the other end of the phone had him seeing red.
“Look, I’m an extremely busy man, Fontaine. The other detective’s desk looked like a pigpen. I’m sure if you look hard enough or have him do it then you’ll find what you need. I’m not coming back down there. I just left the fucking place this morning.”
“I’m afraid I need the statement. How about I come to you since you’re so busy?”
Arsen stilled as he thought about what might happen if they found out he had Steele with him. It might prove very bad.
“Be here around eight. I won’t be home until then.”
“See you then, Mr. Sloan. Thank you. Goodbye.”
With the highball glass in hand, Steele knocked on the door before entering his office. He looked up and was about to bark at her for walking in before he told her she could, but couldn’t muster the energy to do it.
“Here you are, Arsen. A Manhattan. I hope you like it.” She placed it on the desk in front of him and saw a picture of a beautiful car on his computer screen. “Oh, that’s gorgeous. Thinking of getting a new car?”
“Huh?” He looked like his mind was far away. “Oh, not for me, for you.”
She got an odd look on her face.
“I have a truck and don’t want you to be buying me a ton of things. The clothes I get because you want to me to dress a certain way and I can live with that. The car and credit card…”
“Oh, yes. The credit card.” He pulled open the top drawer of his desk and pulled out an envelope. He pulled a platinum colored credit card from it.
“Here, take this. I ordered it last week for you.”
“Arsen, I just said…” She went quiet as his finger touched her lips.
“You signed the contract. It’s all in the book. You should really take some time to read the whole thing. As a matter of fact, I have to take you to your apartment for a little while after dinner. Another detective has been assigned to my case, and she’s coming here at eight this evening.” He took a sip of the drink and gave her a thumbs up. “Great job, Steele.”
She smiled then turned to walk away.
“I have to get back to cooking. I don’t want anything to burn.” She spun back around. “Wait! Did you say she? Like the detective is a woman?”
He nodded. “And take the book with you so you can read it. You’ll have a lot to do tomorrow and need to know what I demand from you, as a submissive. Oh, at dinner, please respond to me as Master instead of my name. That’ll be all.”
Her eyes went wide, and she spun around and left. Her cheeks had turned red in an instant and Arsen had to put his hand over his mouth to hide his smile.
It would just be a matter of time before she realized she was so much more than just a sub.
Part Six: For Her Sake
STEELE
The second glass of wine finally took the edge off Steele’s nerves. She sat in her living room with her roommate, Gwen, and drank wine while she waited impatiently for Arsen to return for her.
The fact he was having to talk to another detective was cause for concern and adding in the fact the new detective was a woman had her woman’s intuition on alert.
Tanner was supposed to go to Arsen’s for the meeting, but she wasn’t sure if he was there or not. Arsen had instructed her not to call him. He didn’t want the detective to get any idea they were seeing each other.
Gwen refilled their wine glasses and took her seat on the other end of the sofa and by her narrowed eyes, Steele felt she was about to get bombarded with questions.
“Okay, so that’s your third glass of wine and now it’s time to talk, Steele.” Gwen leaned back and tapped her finger on the rim of the glass. “Spill it! Tell me everything about you and this Arsen guy.”
“Not much to tell, really. A normal relationship.” Steele sat her glass down as she didn’t want to become too loose lipped by the alcohol.
“Normal! No, it’s not normal, Steele.” Gwen sat up and placed her glass on the table. “He’s been charged with murder, that’s not normal.”
“He’s innocent,” Steele said and picked her glass up as her stomach tensed with the reminder of his predicament.
“It was on the news, Steele. The woman had been his submissive partner. What do you know about that?” Gwen questioned.
“He’s into that kind of thing. No big deal, really. Don’t know why people make such a giant thing about that lifestyle. It’s not what people think. That woman wanted it. That woman wanted him to choke her just to the point of passing out and he did what she asked.” Steele took a long drink as her head was beginning to pound with the admission to her friend.
“While he fucked her. You know that’s how that works, Steele.”
Steele nodded.
“I’m completely aware of that. Thanks for reminding me though.”
“He’s not a real nice man, Steele. You’re virtually innocent and he’s capable of making you into something you’re not. What has he made you do so far? Be honest.” Gwen sat back and looked casual. A thing Steele was aware of and knew she was anything but that.
“He hasn’t made me do a thing. The emphasis on, made.” Steele sighed and looked Gwen in the eyes. “I’ve wanted to do it.”
Gwen shook her head slowly.
“He’s a Master, remember? He made you think you wanted it. So tell me the dirty details.”
“He’s really not like that. Everyone sees this man who is closed off and arrogant, demanding, and somewhat brutal at times. Ask Rowan, he’ll tell you he’s a monster, and he’s hit Rowan a couple of times. But he’s not that. He’s more than that facade he shows the world. But I get to see more of him than that. I get to see some of who he was before he had to become that man to protect the hurt boy inside him.”
Gwen smiled.
“Bullshit, Steele. He’s only making you think he’s letting you in. He’s a master at getting what he wants and he wants little, innocent, sweet you to do what demanding, arrogant, BDSM master wants. End of story. Now you’ve yet to tell me what’s happened in the bedroom between the two of you. So spill it.”
Steele thought for a moment. Would it be a mistake to let Gwen in on at least a little of what she and Arsen had done?
She knew she needed not to hide so much. After another sip if wine she decided to let her good friend know about the life she was moving into.
“Okay, I’ll tell you, but you have to promise not to jump to conclusions or judge either Arsen or me.”
Gwen gave her a nod.
“I am in college to become a psychologist you know. I can be trusted, Steele.”
“Yeah, I know. You’re in your first year so try to remember that. You aren’t thoroughly educated yet.” Steele put the glass down, kicked off her flats and folded he
r legs, Indian style.
“The worst thing so far is that I’ve allowed him to punish me with spankings.”
“Why?” Gwen’s one simple word made Steele’s mind go blank.
Why had she allowed that?
“I think I did it so he would see I was trusting him. I think you would have to have been in my head at that time.”
“What made you think you needed to allow him to physically harm you for him to think you trusted him?” Gwen’s face had paled a bit and her hand shook as she took another drink.
“I’m not really sure, Gwen. The truth is I’m not really sure why I’ve allowed the things I have. I fucking love the man and would walk through fire if he told me to. I don’t know if its trust or what the hell it is. I’d do anything for him and let him do anything he wanted to me.”
The admission had her feeling heavy with an odd guilt. She knew Gwen was trying so hard not to let her see how appalled she was but the look was spreading over her face and it made Steele think she’d made some poor decisions where Arsen was concerned.
“Does he make you do things sexually that make you feel used or abused?” Gwen’s finger tapping on her temple told Steele tons about how her friend was taking the news.
“No. I mean my body is his to do with what he wants. I am his after all.”
Gwen jumped up and began to pace.
“I’m sorry, Steele. This is way too much! What the fuck, girl?”
Steele looked up at her.
“You promised! See, that’s why people don’t talk to others about this. Yes, I believe my body is his. But it’s not like you think. I can walk away anytime I want. I just don’t want to. His touch sends me to a place I’ve never been before. Everything he does to me feels like Heaven. Even when his belt falls across my ass, I fucking love it and get all wet with desire for him. The first two licks, anyway.”
Hacked For Love & The Dom's Songbird Page 60