Wade held still as Luke placed the ball ring at the base of his scrotum then the cage over his cock. Thankfully, Wade was only half-mast. As his erection increased, the cage would tighten and make things very unpleasant.
Luke had several official kink pieces of furniture in the playroom: a St. Andrew’s Cross, spanking bench, and an electric fucking machine. Other than those, the room was actually sparse because he loved to improvise with ordinary items. The man could do a lot with a sub over a desk, which was the centerpiece of the room—a solid oak desk that had drawers filled with kinky toys. It also had straps attached to the bottoms of the legs. He’d once spread my thighs so wide I had to hold the edge of the desk tightly with my fingers for fear of sliding off. He relished me fighting to keep myself in place as he used a heavy flogger.
Luke took Wade to the St. Andrew’s Cross, securing him so his back was facing me and he looked at the wall. Luke picked up a short whip and popped it in the air for effect. Wade didn’t move, though I jumped at the noise. A few seconds later, Luke began working on Wade. It wasn’t heavy duty, but he hadn’t warmed up his skin and Wade flinched with each strike. I watched in fascination, but my eyes were mostly on Luke. He never wore a shirt in here and sweat quickly beaded on his back. He had precise aim and each stroke made his arms bulge. His tied-back hair only accented the muscles in his face. They looked locked into place, a puzzle of square-jawed precision that made me crave the attention of the whip. The intensity of the lashes increased, bringing a low groan from Wade. My fingers became stiff from gripping my thighs so hard.
Luke finally stopped, lay down the whip, and picked up a heavy flogger. The next strikes were hard and steady covering a much larger area. I knew from experience that these hurt more when hitting the newly applied whip marks.
Wade’s shoulders began shaking and I couldn’t help reacting to his pain. I wanted nothing more than to curl into a tight ball. It wasn’t the physical ache that Wade suffered, it was the mental. Something was going on here that I didn’t understand.
Luke suddenly stopped and laid down the flogger. He walked to Wade and spoke in a hushed voice. Wade shook his head and immediately Luke removed the bindings. I thought it was over and managed a deep breath. Too soon, though, because I was wrong. Luke led Wade to the fucking machine. He had Wade go to his hands and knees and attached his wrists and legs with the straps. Luke chose a particularly large dildo and attached it at the end of the fucking rod. Making adjustments, he lined it so Wade’s ass could now take the punishment.
Shit, I couldn’t believe I was watching this.
Without a word, Luke calmly spread lube on the dildo, started the machine, and made a minor adjustment. Wade cried out through gritted teeth as the rod drove the dildo past the rim of his asshole. Luke slapped both cheeks and increased the speed. I’d been in Wade’s position for pleasure and punishment. By not preparing Wade’s ass, this was so obviously punishment. Luke pulled up on Wade’s hair and whispered in his ear again.
I wished like fuck I could hear what he said.
The jerk of Wade’s head was sudden as he shook his head out of Luke’s grasp. Luke increased the speed of the dildo even more. He then stood back, out of my way so we both watched.
Was I part of this punishment? Seeing Wade’s humiliation?
When Luke finally walked away, I followed his movements and then cringed even more when I saw him remove the TENS unit from the cabinet. He approached Wade, stopped the fucking machine, and attached the contacts to the cock cage. A strange noise left my throat at the same time Luke’s gaze almost knocked me from my chair. He was furious and every bit of his anger hit me squarely in the gut. If he’d taken a bat to my midsection it couldn’t be more powerful. I had no idea why he was doing this if it bothered him so much.
Using a Velcro strap, Luke attached the base of the unit to Wade’s back and then flipped the switch. Wade’s groan was long and painful. I’d had the TENS used on me during some of our more intense scenes and knew the unit would back off the electrical current before spiking again. Luke flipped the switch on the fucking machine once more. Wade’s groans turned to cries of agony and I held my breath for as long as possible waiting for him to safeword. It didn’t happen. My eyes went to Luke and now all I saw was his sadistic smirk. I wanted to slap him. I couldn’t figure out why his moods changed so rapidly. Then it slowly dawned on me. Luke knew he’d won.
“Please.” The panting word came from Wade.
Luke went to his knee near Wade’s head, but he didn’t lower his voice, and for the first time, I could hear every word. “Do you have something you want to share with me?”
Wade gulped in air, continuing to cry with pent-up anguish. “Yes,” he said with another harsh sob.
I wanted to wrap him in my arms, but before I could move, Luke had him. He quickly unfastened the straps, shut the fucking machine down, and removed the TENS unit along with the cock cage. He sat on the floor and pulled Wade against him, smoothing his hands over Wade’s body, offering comfort as the man cried.
Wade’s shuttering breaths made it difficult to hear his words, but I pieced them together. “I fell off the wagon and got drunk. Krispin doesn’t know.” Wade tried controlling his emotions, but it was actually more painful for me than watching him cry.
My gaze moved to Luke and everything fell into place. This was what he wanted from me… everything. He wiped the hair from Wade’s face and then he did the one thing I expected least. Luke kissed him. The other man responded as if he were drowning. Their lips moved against each other’s and Wade’s arms went around Luke’s neck.
It was the sexiest fucking thing I’d ever seen. And the saddest. This was what Luke held back because I wouldn’t fully submit. I suddenly understood everything he was doing and I fought against my need to run. I felt trapped by the desire to see this scene play out. To see what I missed because of my fucked up past.
Luke broke the kiss and told Wade to get on his hands and knees. Luke unzipped his pants and released his bulging cock. Removing a condom from his back pocket, Luke slid it on. He lubed himself with slow steady strokes while smoothing his other hand along Wade’s back and sides, placing small kisses against his skin. Luke positioned himself and grabbed Wade’s hips then thrust forward. The primal groan that left Wade’s lips drowned out my thoughts. Wade’s hand slid to his cock and squeezed the head between his thumb and finger. He glanced up, looking at me. For the past half hour, I think he forgot I was there. The need in his eyes went straight to my clit, but I wasn’t part of this scene and he knew it. He began jacking himself off while Luke pumped in and out of his ass. Luke moved more fully over him, laying his cheek against Wade’s back while he strained harder. Luke opened his eyes and pierced me with his dark gaze.
When the two men had fucked me together, I’d noticed how comfortable they were touching each other, but nothing like this. Part of me was jealous and part of me wanted to be in the middle and take them both. My fingers slid on my thighs drawing my eyes downward.
Blood.
I’d scratched deep gouges into my legs. It brought me out of my partial paralysis. I could never give Luke the key to my soul. I was the ice queen who needed pain and degradation to make life tolerable.
Chapter Ten
Machala
Wiping my tears with the backs of my dirt-coated hands brought me out of the past. I was crying again. I’d cried so many damn tears thinking about that last day with Luke that I shouldn’t have any left. I’d received his unspoken message loud and clear.
Give it all or get lost.
I ran from the playroom before they finished, changed into my work clothes, and packed the personal items in my room and bathroom. Then, I walked away. Luke stayed with Wade and didn’t stop me. The months following our split my night terrors grew steadily worse. I finally confided in Danny because I could barely stay awake at the office. I only told him I’d had them since childhood and there was nothing physically wrong with me. When he tried to pry
deeper, I pulled the boss card and told him to leave it be. About six weeks ago, I managed to put aside my aching heart and fall back into the life I led before Luke. I adjusted to not having someone chase away the demons and breathe for me. I buried the memories of Luke just as I had the memories from my childhood. I don’t know which hurt more.
Until he came into my office the day before, I hadn’t heard from Luke in six months. Now my ass and thighs were raw because of his visit the previous night. I wanted him back so badly it was a physical ache.
I took a deep calming breath trying to shake myself from these feelings of hopelessness. After washing my hands under the outside faucet I took a few more slow breaths. Before I could change my mind, I walked inside and picked up my cell phone. It rang twice before he answered.
“Hello?”
“Do you still want a date?” I had no idea if the pretense of an important engagement was still on the table or if what he wanted was a simple night out. Simple, yeah right.
I listened to him breathe for several long seconds. “I want more than a date, Machala, but it’s a start.”
Now it was my turn to breathe into the phone. “When?”
“Monday night. I’ll pick you up at seven.”
Two days. This was just a date. I could wait. “Okay.”
“Machala?” A little of his Dom voice was in the word.
“Yes.”
“Wear something sexy.” This was an order. The line went dead.
Great. What the hell do you wear that’s slut sexy when you’re known as the ice queen? I wanted Luke just as on edge as he had me. Top that off with a sadist who’s seen all of you and prefers you naked? Why did he do these things to me? I chuckled. I’d already answered that question. Luke was a sadist. He worked hard at leaving me guessing and on edge. Fuck, how I missed him.
***
Going to work on Monday morning was an exercise in diversion. I didn’t want Danny to know about Luke coming to my home or about my date that night. Danny wouldn’t understand. Hell, I didn’t understand. Whatever I had with Luke was not over. He obviously felt the same way. For us to successfully split, we needed our relationship to reach a concrete conclusion. Me running away hadn’t done it.
I had several meetings with agents and one author. The former frustrated me, but they were a necessary evil in the publishing world. At least for now. Things were slowly changing and the author scheduled for the three o’clock meeting was self-published with a large backlist I wanted to get my hands on. Winters’ Publishing would change her life and she would boost our sales revenues through the roof. Win-win.
Danny scrutinized me closely as I practically ran through my day. I’d had plenty of practice at not showing lingering signs of pain after weekends of play. Today was no different. With my heavy calendar, Danny had no time to grill me. I would talk to him tomorrow after I survived the date. If I survived.
I left the office at four-thirty after handing the signed author contract to Danny so he could get a copy to our attorney’s office. It felt good to know the day was successful and maybe it would carry into the evening. Larry, the driver from my townhome association, drove me to an exclusive dress shop that I’d used before. When Larry wasn’t available, I took a cab home from work. I found I could work during the drive when traffic would otherwise drive me crazy.
I don’t know what came over me when I saw the dress, but I knew it was perfect. It was black and very conservative in the front, its length going to my knees. Then there was the back. It was open with straps of material holding it together. The straps were spaced closer at my ass and a thin veil of sheer lace in just the right place took it from indecent to… well… indecent. The lace hid my bruises, though. I wouldn’t be wearing underwear, not even a thong, and the thought of the scratchy lace against my ass and legs had me smiling.
After Larry dropped me at home, I took a quick shower and shaved my body. I dried myself off and applied a little makeup and perfume. Luke hated any scent that covered my natural one, but this was a date and we were no longer involved in any power exchange agreement. He needed to live with it. I was ready when he knocked on the door at precisely seven.
I thought he was beautiful when he stood in my office, but now, beauty didn’t quite cover it. He wore a custom-made three-piece black suit with a black shirt. No standard white shirt for Luke. His hair was pulled back and his crooked smile in full blaze. A bouquet of wildflowers rested in the crook of his arm. He presented them to me with a slight bow.
“You’re lovely.” He spoke first.
He thought I was lovely right now, but I would change his opinion. I opened the door wider so he could enter. I took the flowers and turned to the kitchen to grab a vase. I didn’t hear his steps behind me or any other sound. I looked over my shoulder.
His eyes were alive and focused on the bare skin of my back. Turning back to my destination, I grabbed a vase from a shelf in my pantry. I spun around and ran into Luke. He took the vase and flowers from my fingers and rested them on the shelf.
“Do you think I’m taking you anywhere dressed like that?” he asked against my lips.
Without thinking, my tongue came out and I ran it across my lips. We were so close I almost tasted him. “You said sexy,” I replied silkily.
“I’ll be sure to be a little clearer in the future. Hell, I’m dressing you the next time.” His hand traveled under my hemline and he smoothed his palm over my bare ass. “Christ. I don’t suppose you have anything else you can wear.”
His frustrated voice was sexy as hell. “Slacks.”
“A sweater, something to cover the back of you?”
“Luke,” the satisfied grin I was fighting came through, “you’re being ridiculous.”
“Let me see the bruises and I’ll compromise,” he whispered. The soft puffs of his breath hit my lips and I wanted him to kiss me. Instead, he walked backward, bringing me with him.
“The flowers…”
“Will wait.” He had my hand and he extended his arm so I twirled slightly away from him. He moved me so my stomach hit the edge of the kitchen counter. “Palms flat,” he said as he pulled my ass out and slid his fingers under the material. He pulled it up until it rested on my hips.
I’d studied the bruises, loving the colors. Luke moved back so he could see the full effect of my ass. The plaid stripes were different shades of blue. He ran his fingers over my flesh, making me suck in a quick breath. His hands were incredibly warm. Without a word, he lowered the material and adjusted it so I was once more covered.
“I know you have one of those scarf things you can use,” he muttered with no compromise in his voice.
This was a date and I’d done exactly what he asked. Damn him. For once I was getting my way or he was leaving without me. “No. I’m going like this. Take it or leave it.”
The flare of fire in his eyes didn’t scare me. His words did. “Don’t fucking look at another man. I would rather this evening not end in a fight.”
A jealous Luke. Impossible. He shared me with Wade for God’s sake. “I, um…”
“Shh, sexy girl. Put the flowers in water before I change my mind. I thought a date was harmless and we could talk and maybe go from there. Keeping my hands off you may be unmanageable.” His frustration showed clearly.
I hid another grin as I gathered the vase and flowers and prepared them to adorn my counter. Depending on how our date went, they might be moved to my bedroom later. Hopefully after dinner and a night of wild sex. A girl had to dream, right?
Chapter Eleven
Luke
She was fucking killing me. I asked for sexy and she gave me her version of sadistic. Not having my hands on her was one of the most painful exercises in futility I’d ever gone through. My plans before I arrived were to keep my hands entirely off her. That flew out the window within minutes of seeing that fucking dress. Though lifting it and admiring her bruises might not be the sexual fantasy of most red-blooded males, it fucking rocked my socks
.
I had made reservations at an upscale restaurant that our band frequented when we felt like playing dress up. With Krispin’s new wife, Angela, we were settling down and things like suits and ties were keeping us from being tossed out of places we seldom visited back in our crazier days. We weren’t exactly known as the sit-down-dinner type of musicians.
So now I had a major problem. If any man looked twice at Machala, I planned to punch his lights out. Depending on his size, the management throwing us out might include calling the cops. Fuck… where had this jealousy come from? I shared her with Wade for fuck’s sake. If I took her to a dungeon with other people I would be okay. Those men understood the rules of ownership. The fucktards of Hollywood did not.
And, she told me no. I was still reeling from her refusal to cover up. She was royally messing up my plans. No touching was the first and no sex the second. I would take her on a few dates, talk, and get to know her better. I wanted this to go differently than our first relationship. I had to knock down her walls and the D/s dynamic hadn’t gotten me there.
“Luke, stop,” she whispered in my ear as we were shown to our table.
I turned my glare away from the man checking out her ass. “You brought this on.” Yeah, that was adult of me.
The maître d seated us and after I ordered a bottle of wine, Machala leaned closer. “You’re acting juvenile. Intimidating every man in the room will do no good. What’s come over you?”
I took a drink of water. How could I tell her how I felt when I didn’t understand it myself? “This is different…” That wouldn’t work, so I started again. “It’s about control. With you in that dress and us out in public—I’m barely able to control myself and I don’t like it.”
She was so good at hiding her feelings, but she allowed a little softness to lighten her tight smile. “Then why are we here when we could be at my place or your place doing what we do best?”
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