The List

by Alice Ward

  ***

  Worth opened the door to Ford’s room, questions all over his face. “Where did you go?” he asked with definite impatience. I didn’t respond right away. “Are you sick?” he asked.

  “I’m fine. Are people leaving?” I’d lost all track of time.

  “They’re gone. Only your dad is still here and he’s downstairs.”

  “Oh! The time got past me,” I said, getting to my feet and looking around. “Where’s Ford?” I was alarmed.

  “He’s downstairs with Betsy’s sister. She came in and found you both sound asleep on the floor, so she let you sleep and brought him down to me.”

  I went to push past him in the doorway, but he grabbed my arm. “Auggie, what’s going on? You’re acting awfully strange.”

  “I think I had too much to drink, too much excitement or maybe it was the sun. I’m not used to it anymore. I’ll be fine,” I improvised, pushing my hair behind my ears as I headed downstairs. Worth was silent behind me as he followed.

  “Dad!” I exclaimed as I came into the family room where he was holding Ford on his lap. I kissed them both lightly and fell onto the sofa. “Whoa! Sorry, I fell asleep. I guess I’m not quite back to full strength yet.”

  “You do look a bit bushed,” Dad commented, patting Ford’s fat little thigh softly with his palm.

  Worth came in and sat on the sofa at the other end, turning sideways and folding a leg beneath him. He laid his arm on the back of the sofa. It was like a distant hug. I felt it, and yet it felt filled with betrayal.

  “By the way, while I’m thinking of it, Worth,” I began, glad that Dad was there so it wouldn’t become a big deal. “I called an agency and they’re sending over some interviewees for a personal assistant. I had a good bit of interest by others in boarding their horses here this afternoon, then there’s the track to build and I want to begin helping you in your business. I’m starting to get a bit overwhelmed and thought I’d hire someone to back me up when I need a break.” I steeled myself for his response. Now that I’d seen his new director, I decided I needed to keep closer tabs on him.

  “I think that’s an excellent idea,” Worth agreed, smiling. “That’s my Auggie, always thinking two steps ahead.”

  I wasn’t sure if he was mocking me and saw right through my logic, or whether he truthfully agreed, but it didn’t matter. I would hire anyone I wanted to hire.

  “When do you begin interviewing?” Dad asked.

  “The agency is sending some people over within the next week.”

  Dad went on, “The reason I ask is I know it’ll be important to have someone who understands horses and I have a candidate who just might suit you.”

  “Oh, really?” I was puzzled since I didn’t think Dad got around too much.

  “Let me see if there’s any interest and I’ll be in touch.” Dad finished the conversation and we moved on to talking about the party.

  I asked one of the questions that had been burning in my brain. “Worth, why was Linc here? I thought he’d be the last person you’d want hanging around.”

  “I’ve got my reasons, Auggie.”

  I let it go for now but intended to take it up with him again later after Dad left.

  “Was there enough food?” I asked.

  Dad laughed. “Auggie, you always go overboard. There was enough left to have three more parties. If you don’t mind, I’ll take a bit home with me. I’m getting tired of my own cooking.”

  I felt horrible at those words. “Dad, what’s the matter with me? I never thought about the fact that you might be cooking for yourself. Mother always had a maid.”

  “Yes, but a maid with me alone isn’t necessary.” He wiggled his eyebrows. “Anyway, sometimes being the helpless bachelor has its advantages.”

  I excused myself and went into the kitchen where the catering staff was down to two people. “Could you package up some of those leftovers, maybe in freezable containers? I’d like to send them home with my dad. Betsy, naturally you and your sisters should take all you want too.” I snatched up a tiny cake with buttercream frosting and took it with me back to the family room. I took a bite and then put a bit of frosting on my finger to let Ford lick it off. He started rocking back and forth, pushing against Dad to come to me and get some more. “Tastes better than mother’s milk, doesn’t it?” I laughed and gave him one last morsel. He was eating solid foods and I made the decision to begin weaning him so I could be more portable.

  Dad handed off Ford and groaned as he stood. “My feet aren’t what they used to be.” He gave me a hug and slapped Worth on the back. “See you kids next time,” he said and I handed Ford to his daddy while I followed mine out with the bags of food. He stowed them and gave me another hug. “Be good, Auggie. Worth is a good man and you have to trust him. Don’t always be so ready to go to battle, okay?”

  Dad didn’t miss a thing. I thought about what he said as I walked back into the house and decided to keep my own counsel for a while. I loved Worth and he hadn’t betrayed me… yet.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  Auggie

  Dad called me the next week to let me know he was sending someone over to chat with me about the assistant’s position. I had no idea what to expect, but I trusted Dad’s opinion. I’d already interviewed three people the agency sent over and while each one had an area of expertise, none had the right combination.

  It was an introspective process — to figure out what kind of person you are so you can hire someone to be an extension of yourself. I realized it might also be a good idea to hire someone with strengths that offset my own weaknesses. Our combined assets would accomplish more.

  I waited outside on the patio and Betsy announced the visitor. I stood to receive her and was surprised to see a man standing before me. Not just any man, but one of the best-looking men I’d ever laid eyes on. I literally salivated and had to swallow hard before I said anything. “Hello,” I greeted him and held out my hand to shake his.

  “Mrs. LaViere, I’m Bernie Livingston. Well, legally, I’m Bernard, but believe me, I’m far more likely to answer to Bernie.” He smiled and his teeth were blindingly white. His hair was almost a white blond and he had pale gray eyes. He’d be a natural costume at Halloween, I thought to myself.

  “Welcome, Bernie, have a seat. Can I get you something to drink?”

  “Cold water would be wonderful. The day turned out warmer than I’d expected.”

  I grabbed a bottled water we kept in the fridge on the patio and handed it to him. He started to stand when I rose, but I waved my hand for him to stay seated. “We’re really casual around here.” I smiled.

  “Yes, ma’am.” He nodded.

  “That too. Call me Auggie. Did you bring a résumé?”

  “No, ma’am… that is, Auggie. I know it’s customary, but your dad called and it was sort of last minute. I hadn’t really gotten all my things out of storage yet and… well, you know. I’m sorry. I’ll be glad to tell you my education and work history, and I can give you phone numbers of referral contacts.

  “What do you know about horses, Bernie?”

  He smiled. “Oh, that’s easy. That I’d trust a horse any day over a human.” He grinned bigger when I chuckled in agreement. “Auggie, I know I’m young, but remember that also makes me malleable. I’ve grown up with horses and I’ve ridden Steeplechase. I’ve known your dad for a few years and I respect him, and I believe he feels the same or he wouldn’t have sent me. I have a degree in marketing and I probably know the same families around here that you know. I’ve just been away at school for a while and that makes one major difference; I’m not up on the gossip and that’s a good thing.”

  I was still smiling by the time he made his case. “You’re very right about that, Bernie. When can you start?”

  His eyes grew wide. “You’re serious?”

  “I’m serious. The job is about more than horses, though. I need someone who can cover for me when I want to pull in and focus on my family. You’ll need to
supervise the rest of the building here on the estate, manage things for the foundation that supports Sunset Village, run this operation when it’s launched, and make me lunch.” I threw the last in to indicate we would have a sense of humor about all this.

  His pearly whites gleamed. “It would be my pleasure. White or rye?”

  Worth would be furious and I was going to love it.

  ***

  I called Worth to tell him I’d found an assistant, but his voice sounded odd.

  “Hi. Is it an emergency? I can’t talk right now,” he answered before I’d gotten in a word.

  I pushed down the hurt. “No, not an emergency. I can talk to you later.”

  “See you later,” he said.

  I heard voices in the background, so I hung on, trying to catch the mood of what was so important. Worth evidently didn’t take time to tap the End Call button, and that’s when I entered the world of my husband as he behaved without my being there. I was alert to anything that sounded like a patient consultation, at which point I would have immediately hung up — but there was nothing “consulting” going on in this conversation.

  “Just her,” Worth was saying.

  Her? Did that mean me?

  “If it’s important, take the call. I’ll give you privacy,” said the female voice.

  “No, no… she’s never that important. Oh, maybe she thinks she has small crises, but they’re more in her head than anywhere else. Believe me.” He laughed.

  He was talking about me!

  “Worth, honey, shame on you. You shouldn’t talk about your wife that way,” she said.

  I was right!

  “I wouldn’t talk about you that way if we were together,” he answered and I heard some scuffling noises and realized he was probably hugging her, the phone muffled between them.

  I had to bite my lip to keep from screaming at him. I could hear the phrase, “There’s an app for that,” in the back of my mind and wished I had one that would detonate his phone at that very moment.

  “You have beautiful hair,” Worth said and the woman laughed, a soft, seductive sound.

  “So, where did you say we’re going?” she asked, her voice a purr.

  “My farm,” he answered and then the sound was muffled.

  “…normal thing you do on a business day?” I caught the last of her words.

  “This is a special day.” He used that tone, the sexy one that was supposed to be only for me.

  I couldn’t listen to any more. I tapped the phone to end the call and slammed myself onto the bed. I could hardly breathe, whether from anger or fear. Did it matter? Who was she? As if I really had to ask. I knew that voice, that accent. She would be the only one riding with him in the middle of a business day. What farm? Worth must have bought a place and I knew nothing about it. Maybe that’s where he goes when he says he’s supervising his new clinics.

  My brain was spinning and I was having problems with coherent thought. All I kept thinking of were his cruel words about me and what a liar he was. Not only was I not someone who had crises, he kept telling me how much he trusted and respected my business sense. Dammit. He told me over and over how valuable I would be to him if I were to help him with his new ventures. What a liar!

  “Trust me,” he’d said to me time and again.

  Trust!

  That’s what cheaters always ask for; a longer leash with which to stray! I was shaking and the worst part was that it was my best friend who had betrayed me. I had no one to turn to and get it off my chest. I wished I’d never married him. I wished I’d never met him. I couldn’t wish I’d never slept with him because that would mean wishing away my son, and that I wouldn’t do.

  Did he think that just because he married me that I was some sort of possession and he could treat me however he saw fit? Was I the laughing stock of all our friends? Did others know he was carrying on and talking about me at their little lemonade afternoons on the front lawn?

  He was going to pay, I swore to myself. If I were going to be the laughing stock, I would give them all something more interesting to talk about.

  The bastard! I hated him! That’s when I remembered… I lived with him! How could I hate him and still cook his meals, sleep in his bed? I had two choices: I could leave or I could stay and make his life a living hell.

  I considered the options.

  I’d left him before so, this time, I would stay. If I left, I’d only be making his cheating life that much easier. I wouldn’t be a party to that — not ever. No, this called for a calculated method of slow acid down his cheating throat. He couldn’t find out that I knew because he’d only cover his tracks that much better. I had to maintain a certain amount of normalcy. Beat him at his own psychological game.

  I knew just where to begin.

  CHAPTER EIGHT

  Auggie

  When Worth came home that night, I had Betsy tell him I wasn’t feeling well and would be sleeping in a guest room. She was to say that I thought what I had was catching, and he shouldn’t disturb me because he might get sick too. He was so busy, he couldn’t afford to miss work.

  It worked. He tapped on the door, said goodnight, and I feebly call out “Night” in return as though I was too miserable to talk. In turn, I was sitting on the bed, cross-legged with my laptop. I did, however, have the blankets pulled back and my nightshirt on in case he decided to come in anyway.

  The next morning, he tapped on the door again as he left and I watched out the window as his car went down the driveway. I texted Bernie and told him to wear riding clothes and be at the house at nine a.m. He was prompt and I met him out by the show arena.

  I gave him the tour and he took notes as we walked, jotting down everything I told him that still needed completion. I could tell that he was bubbling inside with anticipation at the ultimate picture of what this would all become. I knew he was a horse lover as much as I was. We formed a sort of kinship, as though we were the members of a two-man club where no one else was invited. I loved that and recognized he was a very fast learner.

  My phone buzzed several times and Worth’s name came up, but I shut off the ringer and let it go to voice mail. Let him think I was still sleeping off whatever bug I’d contracted.

  Bernie and I saddled horses and we set off for a ride to the back part of the property where the Steeplechase course was to be built. I was thrilled to hear of his many suggestions. He had tremendous vision when it came to the possibilities, including how to position the various outbuildings, such as restrooms, jockey locker room, and even the stables. The objective was not to block any of the beauty of the surrounding lands or the course itself, in any way. I found that I was actually learning from him which was exactly why I’d hired him.

  His job description was now going to change, however.

  We let our horses graze and sat in the tall grass overlooking the area where the course would be built.

  “Bernie, do you have a girl?”

  “A girl? You mean girlfriend?”

  “Well, yes.”

  He plucked a stalk of grass and bit into it. “Auggie, will it be a deal breaker if I tell you that I really don’t like girls?”

  I caught on to what he was saying and broke into a grin. “No, not at all. In fact, that’s even better.”

  He had been facing straight ahead, tensing for my response but now turned toward me. “Excuse me?”

  I leaned forward in a conspiratorial manner. “Would you like to play a role for me?”

  “What role might that be?” he asked, suspicious.

  “Well, let’s just say that sometimes there are certain people, husbands, shall we say, who need some lessons taught.”

  He looked very serious and said, “I’m sorry, Auggie, for whatever’s happening to you. You don’t deserve to be treated any way but like a princess.”

  “Well, we don’t always get what we deserve.” I twirled around and kicked at a piece of sod with the heel of my boot. “But I think he deserves to get what he ear
ns and for the sake of my son, I’d like to ask you to play along. If you’re willing, that is?”

  “Auggie, you can imagine the problems and treatment I’ve dealt with over my life. I would welcome the chance to be holding the reins just once.” His face held resentment and then delight as his mind considered the fun that lay ahead.

  “I couldn’t be happier than to hear you say that!” A laugh burst out of me as I gave him a quick hug. “Now, are you a very good actor?”

  “You’re talking to a guy whose own parents didn’t know until just last year. What do you think?” He smiled and those blazing white teeth sent chills of anticipation down my spine; anticipation of how jealous Worth would be.

  I giggled like a kid planning an elaborate prank. “Okay, here are the ground rules. You’re to act like you’re smitten with me. Don’t do anything that makes you uncomfortable, but don’t ham it up too much so that it’s a giveaway, either. You can take your cues from me, but don’t be afraid to be creative. Any money you need to spend will come from a debit card I furnish you so this won’t cost you anything. Next, remember one thing. You work for me. No one else can fire you. Not Worth — no one but me. I don’t want anyone to know about this, not even my dad or your best friend. Lastly, please take care for the time being not to show up with your personal friend anywhere that Worth might frequent. We don’t want to give away the game. If it gets too rough and you want out, just say so, okay?”

  Bernie scrambled to his feet, seized the lead from his horse and executed a deep bow from the waist. “It would be my extreme pleasure to be of service to m’lady,” he mimicked and I laughed.

  I stood and curtseyed as we both grinned. We were going to be very, very good friends!

  ***

  I suggested to Bernie that he should keep a small wardrobe at the estate because we were likely to be doing a variety of different tasks, then assigned him one of the guest rooms as his own. “You might even need to sleep here from time to time,” I advised and sent him home to get his things. In the meantime, I showered and changed and by the time I was downstairs, Bernie was waiting for me, similarly attired.