Shattered Bonds: Book Seven of Wicked Play

by Lynda Aicher

  Seth cleared his throat and straightened his shoulders with a forced determination. “Thanks,” he said, his voice strong. “You have news?”

  “I do.” Noah motioned to the corner they’d taken over. Cali and Carter were there, along with Kendra’s parents and two people he didn’t know. He’d already spoken to Rock, who was at the club arranging more security, and Liv was at the center. Thankfully, V and Marcus had finally agreed to stay away now that the news had broken.

  Empty cups and half-eaten bags of chips littered the coffee table next to a stack of worn magazines and a couple of paper bags from a local sub shop.

  “Are Dek and Allie in the rooms?”

  “Yeah,” Seth answered. “Do you need them?”

  “No. Just pass the info on when you get a chance.”

  “They’re moving Jake out of Critical Care,” Cali said. She lifted her hand to her neck, only to flinch when she hit the padded neck brace. She fisted her hand and dropped it to her lap to pick at a chip in her nail polish, her foot bobbing on her crossed leg. A bruise bloomed beneath the white bandage on her forehead, a reminder of the blood that had clotted her blond hair but was now gone.

  The good news about Jake was tempered by the lack of it for the other two. No one said that, but it hung there anyway.

  “I can go sit with Kendra if you need Deklan,” Kendra’s mom offered, already setting her book aside.

  “That’s all right, Mrs. Morgan.” He gave her an appreciative smile. “I doubt he’ll leave anyway.” Noah wouldn’t if the roles were reversed.

  She slumped back in the chair and leaned into her husband when he wrapped an arm around her shoulders. Her designer suit was wrinkled, her eyes puffy and red, but she still managed to have an air of elegance.

  He took in the newcomers and stepped up to introduce himself. Kendra’s brother and sister, Chris and Emily, exchanged greetings, then he took a seat and dropped straight into business mode.

  “The police released the names,” he said, making eye contact with each person sitting around him. Cali’s inhale was the hiss of exclamation he’d expected. “Everyone who was in the car has been identified. At this point, I don’t know which names will be used, but the information will most likely go out today.” He checked his phone. Three hours until the evening broadcasts.

  Kendra’s father let out a low curse and leaned in. “Can’t we stop them? I’ve got a lot of contacts I can use.”

  Noah appreciated the man’s offer, but it wouldn’t help. “At this point, it’s better to let the information flow. It’s too late to stop, and attempting to do so will only make it more powerful.” He glanced at Cali, who’d turned ashen. “It’s likely that Jake, Deklan and Seth’s names will be disclosed as the listed owners of The Den.” Her eyes closed, and Carter grabbed hold of her hand, which she clenched.

  For the thousandth time he cursed the situation. So many lives are going to be turned over and changed because of the revengeful pettiness of one man.

  “What about the rest of you?” Seth asked from behind his clasped hands. His toe tapped a silent beat on the carpet.

  “I don’t know.” And that really pissed him off. He couldn’t prepare for the unknown. He assessed the reaction of Kendra’s family, his focus holding on her dad. There was no easy way to approach this. “Mr. Morgan. You’re aware of what kind of club The Den is, right?”

  Deklan had given him a brief summary of Kendra’s past and her parents’ knowledge of it when they’d talked on the phone. Confirming their understanding of what their daughter did with her fiancé was about as low on his wish list of things to do as having bamboo jammed under his nails.

  Damn it. Anger burned up his spine to flush him with heat. He couldn’t shake the sense he was committing an act of betrayal against Kendra and Deklan. Their private desires should never have to be laid out before their families and the world to judge.

  “It’s Thomas,” Mr. Morgan answered in clipped notes. He glanced at his other children, whose faces were filled with a confusion his lacked. “Eleanor and I do. Kendra told us everything when she met Deklan.”

  Relief washed through Noah. At least he didn’t have to go into a detailed explanation of BDSM to the older couple. A bit of anxiety released with his shallow exhale, yet the resentment remained.

  “What are you—”

  “We’ll discuss it later.” Thomas cut off his son, adding a sharp look that had the other man glaring back.

  “I have to talk to my kids,” Cali said, a quake in her voice. She blinked a few times, her focus distant. “I don’t…” She bit her lip, and Carter hauled her into a gentle hug. “I don’t know how I’m going to explain it to them. Or my parents.” She closed her eyes, held within Carter’s arms but seemingly unaware of the offered support.

  Helplessness swirled with the frustration and anger to eat at Noah’s gut. He searched his mind for ways to help Cali explain, support he could give or a way out, but he had nothing.

  “Will they understand?” Thomas asked. “I can talk to your parents if you’d like.”

  Cali looked at him, unmoving for a moment. “Thank you. I appreciate your offer.” She sat up, and Carter let her go when she rolled her shoulders. “But I need to handle this.”

  “You don’t have to do it alone,” Carter insisted.

  “But I do,” she bit back. “It’s my problem.”

  “We’re all in this.” Seth’s calm voice eased through the stress that held them all. “It’s not just your problem.”

  “Not this part. This is my life, and I have to deal with my family’s judgments.” There was no way to counter that truth.

  “You know we’re here for you, right?” Noah asked her. The pathetic uselessness of his words wasn’t lost on him. Cali was facing the potential loss of her family if they judged her harshly, in addition to a public outing of desires that the majority of society deemed as wrong.

  She stood and moved to stare out a window at the rain-drenched day. Carter started to rise, but Noah placed a hand on his knee to stop him.

  “I know what she’s going through,” he insisted. “Losing your family because of who you are.”

  “Give her a moment.”

  Carter waged a silent battle with him before he slowly settled back into the chair.

  “Allie needs to prepare, too,” Seth said, shifting the focus off Cali. “Her family is extremely conservative. There’s also her law firm.”

  “Would someone please tell me what everyone is so afraid of?” Chris asked. He brushed off his father’s hand and leaned into the group. “So the asshole who hit them had a vendetta. But why? What is so damn secretive about this club?” His gaze passed over everyone, yet no one jumped to answer.

  The man was a younger version of his father. Brown hair neatly styled in a fashionable cut that went with his tailored clothes and Italian loafers. Noah recognized the brand. In fact, he identified with the man in many ways.

  His sister nudged his arm and handed over her phone. She tucked a length of hair behind her ear and gave them a weak smile. “That might be easier.”

  Of course. The Den’s website. Conservative and nicely presented, it matched the image of the club. Yet the information was clear on what the club offered.

  Chris gaped, tapped the screen a few times and cleared his throat before he lifted shocked eyes to his parents. “You know about this?” They gave slow nods. “I thought… I didn’t think… Christ.” He stared at the ceiling, and Emily eased her phone out of his clenched hand. “I thought Eric forced her into that stuff. I didn’t know she wanted it.”

  “Why does it matter?” his sister asked, getting in his face. “It’s her life. Her choices. And we’ve seen how Deklan treats her like a queen.”

  “But I don’t need to know about this.” He pointed at her phone.

  “Exactly,” Emily exclaimed. “That’s the whole point of this discussion. No one needs to know about any of this, but the choice is gone. That bastard took his life and ruine
d theirs. Kendra’s in a coma and when she wakes up, she’ll have this…this mess to deal with. I wish he was still alive so he could rot in jail. He doesn’t deserve to get off so easy. It’s not fair.”

  She gulped in a breath and collapsed into the seat, tears rolling down her cheeks. The silence engulfed them after her rant.

  Chris swore and tucked her head to his chest when he hugged her. “I’m sorry, Em,” he whispered. “You’re right. None of this is fair.”

  Seth met Noah’s eyes, his silent question of blame flowing between them. Noah shook his head at the man, but Seth thrust to his feet and stalked to the other side of the room.

  Fucking shit. Noah buried his hands in his hair and tried to find answers where there were none. Seth was the one who’d leaked the video that had eventually outed Harcourt as an abusive Dom last fall. The man’s fall from grace had been harsh but brief from a media standpoint. He’d withdrawn from the re-election race and seemingly disappeared shortly after resigning from the council.

  Now with the circumstances reversed, Noah had a different perspective on the event. One that shoveled the guilt and regret so deep he had no idea how to get rid of it. And he’d been only a bystander in the event. Had he advised them wrong? Were they all culpable, even if someone else had given the video to the press?

  The condemning questions that evolved into a guilty mantra wouldn’t help. He’d gone that route after Beth and in the end it hadn’t changed a thing. She was still dead, and even though he still blamed himself, she was the one who’d committed the act.

  Just like Harcourt had.

  He sat up, his gaze going to Seth. The man was hunched over with his hands hiding his face in a chair by the door, as far from them as he could get. With the weight of responsibility holding him down, Noah stood.

  Thomas caught his eye, his shrewd gaze narrowed in question. Noah subtly shook him off. “Not now,” he said, then turned to Carter. “Go to her.” He lifted his chin toward Cali and went to Seth. “Hey.” He clamped a hand on the man’s shoulder and sat next to him. “I know what you’re thinking, and you need to stop.”

  “How?” The single word held a drowning dose of torment.

  “Harcourt did this, not you.”

  “But if I hadn’t—”

  “Then he’d still be abusing men who weren’t given a choice to say no,” Noah insisted, reinforcing his conviction with a hard shake of Seth’s shoulder. “You acted with good intentions. No one could’ve predicted this would happen.”

  “But I didn’t.”

  He had to lean in to hear the low words. “You didn’t what?”

  “I acted because I was mad. I wanted revenge for Tyler. Period.” Seth looked up, his expression a mix of pain and conviction. “I wasn’t thinking of anyone else. Now that one selfish act has caused all of this.” He swung his arm out to encompass the room. “I did this,” he snarled.

  Noah held his stare through several deep breaths, heart racing with the importance of finding the right response. “Were you driving Harcourt’s truck?”

  Seth frowned and turned away. “Don’t.”

  “What? Speak the truth?”

  “You can’t make this better.”

  Noah winced at the direct hit. “But you can make it worse if you don’t snap the fuck out your self-pity act.”

  Seth whipped around, fist poised to strike.

  “Do it,” Noah goaded, tensing. “Then you can feel guilty about that, too.”

  Seth’s fist wavered before he let it fall to his side. “You dick.”

  There was no heat in the words, and Noah released the breath he’d been holding. “I try not to be, but somehow I still manage it.”

  Seth snorted and wiped a hand over his mouth. “Join the club.”

  Noah braced his forearms on his legs to copy Seth’s pose. A scan of the room showed Thomas and Chris watching their exchange with mirroring expressions of avid interest and speculation.

  He lowered his voice and nudged Seth with his knee. “You can’t carry the blame for this. It’s too much, and the other two need you to be strong, not buried under guilt that isn’t yours to bear.”

  “That’s easier said than done.”

  “I know.” Damn, did he know. Noah could sense Seth studying him, but he kept his gaze on the worn industrial carpet.

  “Beth?”

  Noah grimaced, hands clenching in reflex. The instinct to brush off the question was right there. He didn’t talk about her. Couldn’t for the longest time. The sick churn of the exact guilt he was telling Seth to let go of twisted and stabbed at his chest. He was a fucking hypocrite.

  He hung his head and found himself admitting, “Yes.”

  Seth said nothing for a while, and Noah silently thanked him for that. His throat was dry from all of the words and emotions that were stuck in it. Four years was a long time to stay silent.

  “Don’t do this to yourself,” Noah finally rasped. “Trust me. It doesn’t help.”

  “And what do I do when the others follow the trail back to me? What then?”

  “God, Seth.” Noah met the man’s eyes. “Do you think everyone else is blame free? We all celebrated when Harcourt was exposed. He was a two-faced bastard who practiced abuse under the guise of dominance. I doubt any of us felt an ounce of sympathy for him. Not when he was exposed. Not when he lost his job. His respect in the community. His family. To us, it was justified by his actions. Something he deserved.”

  “He lost his family?” Seth was clearly clueless on that, whereas Noah had kept tabs on the man.

  “Yeah.” Noah said. “His wife divorced him. Kids won’t speak to him.”

  “I didn’t know.”

  Maybe Noah was the only one who did. He hadn’t updated the other partners as it hadn’t been relevant to them, but now he wished he had. Hindsight was a real bitch.

  “We knew it was a possibility. It’s exactly what we’re all afraid of right now.” Noah looked to Cali, who was leaning into Carter by the window, the thick neck brace covering where Jake’s delicate silver collar usually lay. “That those exact things will happen to any or all of us, right?”

  Seth sat back, scrubbing his hands over his stubbled cheeks. “Fucking Christ. This just keeps getting worse and worse.”

  Noah wanted to disagree but couldn’t. There were too many things he wanted to rant at and disagree with to no end. So many things… “At least we all have something Harcourt didn’t have.”

  “What’s that?” Seth asked, dropping his hands with a heavy thud in his lap.

  Noah raised his brows. “Each other. A support system. People to lean on.”

  Seth barked out a laugh. “When did you get so sentimental?”

  “When I watched a truck slam into a car carrying seven of my closest friends and thought I’d lost them all.” Noah replied quickly, with a dead calm that shocked even him.

  Seth sucked in a breath, but Noah didn’t look away. Seth had to understand he wasn’t in his own little vacuum of pain.

  Seth closed his eyes and nodded. “I get it. I do.”

  “Hey.” Noah squeezed the man’s thigh and waited until he opened his eyes. “We’re all doing our best right now. Don’t beat yourself up any more than you have to.”

  “And you’re taking that same advice, right?”

  Noah’s lips twitched. “About as much as you and Deklan are.”

  “Exactly,” Seth scoffed.

  Right. Noah changed the subject, switching over to The Den. They talked numbers and tactics for a bit before Allie came into the room, looking worn and tired like the rest of them.

  “I needed to use the bathroom,” she said. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying, her curly hair springing wildly around her head. Seth tugged on her uninjured hand, and she collapsed onto his lap. “One of us should be there if he wakes up,” she mumbled into his shoulder.

  “He’s in a medically induced coma.” Seth buried his nose into her hair and inhaled, his arms tightening around her waist,
away from her broken arm. “He can’t wake up yet.”

  “What if he never does?” she croaked.

  “Shh. We can’t think like that.”

  “I know.” She sniffed. “I know. He’s just so still. He’s never still.”

  Seth rocked her, eyes blinking rapidly. “He’ll wake up.” He pressed a kiss to her temple. “He has to. He’s fought too hard to leave us now.”

  Witnessing the depth of their anguish over their injured partner tore open old wounds in Noah. The level of fear and unanswered prayers that were followed by rants and curses were once again fresh in his mind and heart. How were they all going to make it through this?

  He left Seth with Allie and checked in on Cali before finally addressing Thomas. “I was going to get a coffee in the cafeteria. Would you like to join me?”

  “I’m coming, too,” Chris said, thrusting to his feet, his glare defying Noah to say no.

  “Of course.” There was no point in withholding information from any of them, no matter how incriminating the details were.

  “I’ll bring you back a cup,” Thomas said to his wife. He squeezed her hand then rose. “Let’s go.”

  With one last glance at the people who were now his family, Noah slung his briefcase over his shoulder and led the way out of the room.

  Chapter Thirteen

  “But how does that work?” The boy squinted at Noah from behind dark-framed glasses that were too big for his thin face. He screwed up his mouth and returned his glare to the line of numbers on the paper before him. “If I multiply these two numbers first, won’t that mess up the results?”

  Noah grabbed a clean piece of paper and explained the math theory again, this time taking it from a different approach.

  “Oh, I get it,” Jessica chimed in, excitement in her voice. She tugged the paper away from Noah and scribbled on the page to show Anton what she’d figured out.

  Noah sat back and let the two work together. Her joy at understanding the complicated equation filled Noah with unearned pride. She was just one of the many kids he’d tutored at Liv’s youth center, but every time the lightbulb came on for one of them, the sense of accomplishment that filled him was far greater than any he’d achieved practicing law.