Safe and Sound

by Caitlin Ricci

  “Don’t worry about it. I’m a bit disappointed that you aren’t open to it, but that’s fine. It’s not the first time I’ve been rejected for that, and I still want to hang out here and help you with your problem. So what do you want to do? Are you okay having him come over here so that you can get the evidence you need so that he can get out of your life?”

  It would be out of my mom’s life too, and I really wanted that to happen. “You sure you’d be here? The whole time?”

  “Of course.” Oliver got up and joined me on the couch. He put his arm behind me, and I moved closer to him. I liked being pressed against him like this. I felt secure and comfortable. I didn’t necessarily feel safe, but I did feel something like that. Maybe after John was out of our lives I could really relax too. I wanted to be friends with Oliver then. Open friends where he could come over and I wouldn’t have to hide that I liked him and that I was attracted to him. I was worried my mom might not want me around when she found out I was gay, but I was certain it would be a lot easier to come out to her once John was out of the way.

  I took out my phone while he was still holding me. My mom would be at work right now, but John should be at home. I called his cell phone.

  “You know you’re giving your mom hell right now, don’t you? She’s crying herself to sleep every night because she doesn’t know where you are.”

  Oliver took the phone from me and put it on speaker. I didn’t mind that he wanted to hear. I did mind, however, that John was acting like neither of them had known where to find me. I’d been at the rescue for days. Where else would I have gone if I wasn’t at Eli’s? Granted they had no idea where he lived, but the rescue wasn’t hard to find at all.

  “I want to talk to you. In person. But just you. Can you meet me at the rescue tonight?” I tried to be strong and not to have my voice squeak, but I was still pretty sure that I was mumbling and barely able to be heard.

  “Why?” John snapped at me.

  “So that we can talk about….” I rubbed my stomach. I was starting to feel really sick. “I want to talk about what you do. To me.”

  “You want to talk about us and how you can make it up to me so that you can come home?”

  I hated how he put it, like I owed him something, but I knew I had to agree to that in order for this to work. “Yeah. That.”

  “Are you at the rescue now?”

  “I am.”

  “I’ll be there in an hour. Then, after we talk, I’m bringing your ass home. No more of this bullshit. You don’t get to hurt your mother like that.”

  I knew I’d hurt her. That was the worst part of it. In trying to be away from him, in trying to protect myself for once, I’d really ended up hurting her. “I know. I’ll be here.”

  “Good.”

  He hung up on me, and I lay across Oliver’s lap. He took my phone from me. I wasn’t sorry to see it go as he put it down on a nearby table. “He sounds like an ass,” Oliver said as he ran his fingers through my hair. It felt nice to be petted like that.

  “He is,” I mumbled. I closed my eyes, just for a moment. I needed to relax and be a lot calmer than I was right then if this was really going to work. I didn’t want John to wonder why I was freaking out and to figure out that something was up. I needed him to believe that after we talked everything was just going to go back to how we always were and things were going to be just fine between us. I also needed him to believe that I was going to go home with him like everything was back to normal and I’d been the one to screw up and that leaving had been some huge mistake. I knew that wasn’t right, but I needed him to think that, and I wasn’t a very good actor at all.

  “Thanks for being here right now. I really needed a friend.”

  “What about Eli?”

  I shrugged. “He’s my best friend, and he would have been here too, but he can be kind of crazy at times. He’s super protective. I don’t think he could have kept himself from attacking John, and that’s not what’s needed right now.”

  “What makes you think I have any more restraint than he does? I don’t like your mom’s boyfriend much either right now.”

  He started rubbing my chest, and I turned onto my back to give him better access to me. I liked when he touched me like this. It was sweet and comforting, like he was petting me just to make me feel better and not like he was trying to get anything more than this out of me. When he lifted up my shirt to rub my stomach, I didn’t mind that either. I closed my eyes again and let him touch me. I relaxed as much as I could, and I breathed deeply.

  “Do you love Chester?” I quietly asked. I wasn’t sure why I was so curious about their relationship. Maybe because it was so new and strange to me. I didn’t understand it at all.

  “Not really. He’s fun, and we enjoy the time that we have together, but I don’t love him. To me love is when you can picture yourself being old with someone else, and Chester isn’t that person for me.”

  “Does he love Phillip, then?”

  Oliver snorted. “Probably not. He may love parts of Phillip, like how he has absolutely no inhibitions, but I don’t think he really does. Phillip is fun for him, and Chester likes having fun.”

  “What do you like?”

  “This,” he said, his voice going soft. “How we are right now. You and me. You laying over my lap, looking relaxed, and me getting to touch you however I want to. This is nice. Do you like it too?”

  I nodded. I really did. “I wish we could stay like this longer. It’s helping me calm down and get ready to see John when he comes.”

  “I wish we could too. But even though we can’t, it’s not like I’m really going anywhere. I’ll still be here for you.”

  “I couldn’t do this if you weren’t.”

  He played with my hair for a while longer, and I clung on tightly to him. I didn’t want to let him go. He was my safety right then. I’d tried my best to never be alone with John before, as much as I could anyway, and I hated that now I was putting myself in that same position that I hated to be in. But this was going to be the last time, I reminded myself. I’d record him, and then my mom couldn’t deny what I was saying. Not about John at least. Maybe even she’d start to believe me about my uncle.

  “You should probably go hide or whatever it is that you’re going to be doing when he gets here,” I mumbled. I didn’t want him to stop holding me, but John couldn’t see him.

  “Are you going to be okay?”

  I had to be. “Yeah. I’m going to have to be.”

  He gave me a big squeeze and then kissed me on my forehead. I needed a little more from him before he left me alone with John, though. I shouldn’t have wanted to kiss him. I definitely shouldn’t have kissed him either. But I did. I crawled into his lap, and I settled myself over his hips, and then I kissed him.

  Oliver squeezed my hips and slipped his hands to my butt, giving me a firm squeeze. I didn’t even care. Oliver was the first to pull away, turning his face away from mine so that I couldn’t keep kissing him.

  “I need to go hide, and you don’t want me. Remember?”

  I nodded. I did remember. That didn’t stop me from still wanting to be kissing him. “Thanks. I needed that.”

  “I know you did. That’s why I let you kiss me for as long as you did. To me a kiss can just be a kiss, and I’ll kiss you as much, and as often, as you want me to. But I know there are things you can’t do because I’m not yours. We can talk more about that later. For now, try to look like you’re not so scared while I go hide behind the desk. Remember, I’m never going to be more than a few feet away from you if you need me.”

  I looked to the desk. It really was only three feet, at the max. “Should we have a code word? Just in case?”

  He smirked. “Sure. Like what?” He gave my butt another squeeze, distracting me.

  “Orange?” I couldn’t imagine saying that in any regular conversation with John. I didn’t even like the fruit, and I liked the color even less. I was much more of a berry person.
/>   “Sure. If you say orange, I’ll come out and kick his ass for you.”

  Which might put Oliver in jail for beating him up. I shook my head. “Just yell at him or something instead. Okay? Don’t go to jail for this.”

  He laughed, and I got off his lap. I ran my fingers through my hair and tried to relax while he was crouching behind the desk. I set up my phone to be nearby and propped it up with a book so that I could record what was about to happen. My phone wasn’t really noticeable, so I hoped he didn’t see it. I desperately needed this to work. I couldn’t keep going like this.

  A few minutes later, John pulled up to the rescue. His lights flashed over the windows in the office. I opened the door so he could find me easier. He waved to me, and even smiled, as he got out of his car and came toward me.

  He hugged me when he came into the office. It was weird, and he held on way too long. “I’m so glad you’re okay. We were worried about you. You have no idea how much. Your mom has been a mess since you took off.” He rubbed my hair and kept me close against him. I hated it, and I tried to wiggle out of his hold, but he just held me longer.

  “Sorry,” I mumbled, hoping that would get him to let me go. It was no use, though. He still held on to me. He kissed me on my forehead, just as Oliver had done earlier, only when Oliver did it, I felt happy about him kissing me. When John kissed me, I felt sick. He kissed me lower, moving his mouth to my cheek. I began to struggle when he went for my mouth.

  But I wasn’t fast enough, or maybe I wasn’t strong enough. John had never kissed me on my mouth, but suddenly he was. I pushed him as hard as I could, and he finally let go of me. I rubbed at my mouth as I stared at him.

  “Get out,” I hissed. I could barely speak. I didn’t even know how to breathe. Tears stung my eyes.

  John shook his head. “Don’t be stupid. You’re coming home with me, and you’re going to be good from now on.”

  I could imagine what his idea of me being good was, and it was never going to happen. “I’m not going anywhere with you.” He grabbed for my arm, but I shook him off. When he grabbed me again, this time around my side, fighting him didn’t work as well.

  So I called for backup. “Orange.”

  I just had to say it once, and I didn’t even have to shout. Oliver came out from behind the desk and pulled him off of me. Then he shoved him out the door and locked it behind him, protecting me. I was shaking as Oliver held me.

  “Email that video to your mom. Or text it to her. Whatever you need to do. Just get it done right now before he gets a chance to get to your house and tell her something other than the truth about what happened here tonight.”

  I knew he was right. But I couldn’t move until John had pulled out of the parking lot. Then I still had to hold Oliver’s hand as I saved the video and emailed it to her. She would get it on her phone, and I hoped that she would see it soon. I should have called her, or at least given her a text as a head’s up, but I couldn’t do more than I’d already done, and maybe part of me was still mad at her for how she hadn’t believed me the first time.

  “You’re going to be on it too.”

  “I know. I don’t care. Are you okay? Do you want to get out of here?”

  I did, but I didn’t want John to come back and possibly do something to the horses. And I didn’t want to call Eli and have him worry about the rescue either, because he would have. But I still did need to call Eli. I’d promised him I would.

  “I don’t want to leave. I do need to call Eli, though.”

  Oliver smiled at me. “And let him know that I haven’t kidnapped you yet?”

  I tried to laugh. It barely came out. “Yeah. Something like that.” I sighed as I came back over to the couch. Oliver sat down beside me and put his arms around me again. I didn’t mind that at all. In fact, I felt like I needed to be close to him right then. “Thanks for staying, and for coming out when I needed you.”

  “Of course.”

  He rubbed my back, and I took out my phone. “I’m going to call Eli now.” I didn’t really want to, but I knew I needed to.

  “Hey,” I said as soon as he picked up.

  “So your mom just called me.”

  My heart sank. “Huh?”

  “She said that you might not want to talk to her right now, but she was on her way to get you. Also, she wanted to know who the man in the video was. So what’s going on with you?”

  He sounded pissed. I groaned. “I gave her proof of what John was doing, and Oliver was here to protect me.”

  “Why didn’t you call me?” He sounded hurt, and I didn’t want him to feel that way. I didn’t mean to upset him.

  “This wasn’t planned,” I tried to explain.

  Eli sighed. “I’m on my way. Don’t argue with me. Where are you? Your mom thought the video looked like it was shot at the rescue, but I wasn’t sure since I haven’t seen it.”

  “I am there. And I don’t want you seeing it. Not now or ever.” I hadn’t meant for this to happen, and I felt like crap that everyone had to come here for my problem.

  “Okay. Do you need anything on my way there?”

  I really didn’t. “Not right now. But thanks. Is Grayson coming too?”

  “Yep.” He still sounded angry.

  “I’m sorry. I know you’re mad.”

  “I’m not mad at you at all. I’m pissed at John. I want to run him over with my car, and then I want to throw him off the top of Pike’s Peak. And then I want to drive back down to the bottom of the mountain and run over him again. I’ll see you soon. Be safe. Your mom just texted me that she’s there and hopes you’re not mad at her, so I’ll let you go talk to her.”

  “Okay,” I squeaked out. He hung up and I cringed as I waited for my mom to show up. “So my mom’s coming. Do you want to leave before she gets here?”

  Oliver laughed. “Hell no.”

  He was such a strange man. My mom came into the office a few minutes later, not long enough for me to get away from Oliver, though, so she found us like that cuddled up on the couch together.

  She hugged me the best she could since I hadn’t moved away from Oliver, but I didn’t know how to feel about her. I was glad she was there, but it hurt that it had taken a video to get her to believe me. I’d had to put myself in danger, and had to be around a man I couldn’t stand, in order to get her to trust that what I was saying was the truth this time.

  “Mason, honey, do you want to introduce me to your friend?”

  I glanced between her and Oliver. “Oliver, this is my mom. Mom, this is my friend Oliver.”

  “Not a boyfriend?” she pressed. Her question surprised me, since I had thought she’d never ask me such a thing, but it sounded like it came easily to her. I blinked a few times, trying to understand what was going on here. “I know. I’ve known for a while that you’re gay,” she quietly told me. “I thought for the longest time you were dating Eli, and then he met his boyfriend, so I figured eventually you would tell me. That’s not what’s important here tonight, though. We can talk about that more later.”

  Well okay, then. My worries and fears about her finding out that I’m gay seemed to be completely unnecessary. At least that was one less thing I needed to worry about in this shit storm of a night.

  I shook my head as I answered her question. “Chester is his boyfriend.”

  “I really am just a friend,” Oliver tried to assure her.

  I’d had enough of talking about Oliver and who he was, or was not, dating. There were far more important things going on tonight than that. “Are you going to leave John?”

  She sat down in the chair across from us. “Of course I am. After seeing him kissing you and you trying to get him to stop. How could you think that I wouldn’t? How long has this been going on?” She looked upset, and then she started crying.

  Oliver tightened his arm around me. “He was abusing Mason.”

  My mom looked to me for confirmation, and I nodded. That had been what was going on. It was much easier t
o talk about when he was talking about it for me.

  “Oh, honey.”

  I shook my head. I didn’t want her pity. I just wanted to know that John was officially out of her life for good. “When is he getting his stuff out?”

  “I haven’t talked to him yet. But we’re done. He’s going to be gone. Do you want me to call the police?”

  “No, I don’t. I don’t want the police involved. I don’t want to press charges. He technically never did anything illegal. I just want him gone.” I hoped she realized just how serious I was about that.

  She nodded. “Of course. Mason, I am so sorry about this. If I’d only known…. If you’d told me something. Then I could have stopped this.”

  Seriously? I stared at her. “You didn’t last time. I didn’t think you would this time either without some proof.”

  She looked confused, though I had no idea how she could be. “I was seven when I told you about Uncle Tim.” That seemed to jog her memory. She started crying. I buried my face in Oliver’s shoulder.

  “She seems really upset,” he whispered.

  Yeah, she did, but so was I.

  “Where are you staying tonight?” Oliver asked me as he continued to rub my back. “I don’t want you here alone in case he comes back.”

  “You’re coming back home with me, aren’t you?” my mom asked me.

  I shook my head. I definitely wasn’t doing that. “John might go there. I need a place where he doesn’t know to look for me. For right now at least.”

  “He can’t find you at my house,” Oliver pointed out.

  That would be nice. I pulled away a bit so that I could look up at him. “Are you offering?”

  He nodded. “I am. I’ve got a spare bedroom. You could stay for a week or so if you wanted to.”

  That settled that, then. “Thanks. I’d like to.”

  Mom didn’t look happy about that. “Mason, I really think you should come home with me. I’ll keep you safe.”

  She hadn’t so far. I knew that wasn’t fair, but that’s how I was feeling at the moment. She worked long hours and I couldn’t be vulnerable again. What if John came back to get me while she was at work and I was all alone? “I’d rather stay with Oliver right now, at least until this thing with John is settled.”