We'll Always Have Christmas: A gorgeously uplifting Christmas romance

by Jenny Hale

  She willed the color into her face, knowing for certain that it must have drained completely out, her heart hammering in her chest, her pulse banging the inside of her head. She was feeling sweaty and lightheaded. So many questions were scrambling for answers: Was Gram the woman from the café? Was this really the ring? But it had to be; it looked exactly like the ring William had described. Did Pop-pop know? Alex had said he’d never forgive William if he’d given away the ring, and they were just starting to make headway. She couldn’t possibly keep it. It needed to be back with the family. Should she give it to William? Or Alex? Or should she pretend that it never happened? She knew she couldn’t. She managed a smile for Pop-pop and headed out to the car with what she knew was the Harrington ring in her hand.

  Noelle spent the rest of the day at the bakery not speaking to anyone apart from answering their questions. She’d said she had a really bad headache, and they all told her not to let the stress get to her, but she was really thinking about the gazillion-dollar ring in the glove box of her car.

  Noelle’s dad had done all he could for the day. He had a bad back, and she knew she couldn’t push him, but the bakery was still in complete disarray. He’d struggled to get the baseboards sanded, having had to bend down for so long. Pop-pop certainly couldn’t do it at his age, and with Noelle’s job, she didn’t have the time. She’d spent the entire day cleaning equipment and discarding old inventory, as well as clearing out the trash that had accumulated on the back patio. She had to leave for the day, but she’d planned to go back that night. She’d arranged for her mother to watch Lucas for her, feeling awful because she was already having to watch him so much, but knowing that in her current state, she just needed to be alone to think things through.

  With all the sanding left, and the plumber still to come, she couldn’t paint the walls, so all she’d done in the main room were the bookshelves, and she still had a third of those to go. Phoebe, Jo, and Heidi were all working but promised to help her tomorrow. Her mother had been there some of the time, and she was with Lucas the rest of the day once he got home from school.

  As Noelle pulled into the drive at the mansion, she rubbed her sore shoulder and tried not to think about what she was going to do with the precious cargo in the glove box. She had to get a quick shower, her body covered with dust and dirt, and then tend to William. With nervous energy zinging through her, she opened the glove box and pulled out the ring, taking it from its container and slipping it onto her finger. Was she just being crazy? She tilted the diamond to see if it shone. Was this just some sort of insane coincidence? Perhaps the diamond wasn’t real at all but some piece of jewelry Gram had found in one of those eclectic shops she liked to visit and the initials happened to be the same. Remembering the story of the names scrawled in William’s bedroom, she looked around and then, closing her eyes, pressed the diamond to the window of her car, dragging it down the side a few inches.

  She didn’t want to open her eyes for fear of what she might see. The ring sat on her finger, a perfect fit, the heaviness of the stone weakening her resolve to see, once and for all, if it was real. With the car engine off, a chill ran through her, the reality setting in before she’d even looked. Then, she opened her eyes and gasped as she stared at the etched surface of the glass, her vision blurring with the realization that the diamond was real.

  “Hey!” She heard Alex, his face appearing at the window, causing her to jump out of her skin. She threw her palm over the diamond, hiding both hands in her lap.

  “I thought you’d gone.”

  “I got to the airport and felt awful the way I’d left things. I took a few meetings via phone and changed my flight so I could have a minute to talk.”

  He opened her door and she got out, feeling like her knees were going to buckle at any minute. She jammed the hand with the ring into her coat pocket and leaned against the car for support.

  He looked down at her. “I’m sorry about the way I left things. I don’t want you to think for a minute that I am leaving you specifically. But it’s something I have to do.”

  Could his leaving for New York be just like Phoebe’s situation? Was he taking that chance to see how successful he could be? Why was it happening now when her and Lucas’s hearts were on the line? She looked into his eyes, letting his sincerity seep down to her bones, the flutter returning and making her momentarily forget about the ring on her finger for that moment.

  “Are you okay?” he asked, his brows furrowing. “You look really rattled. I didn’t mean to startle you. I just wanted to see you before I left. My flight’s tonight.” He reached out and put his hands on her arms, trailing down them, grasping for her hands, but impulse took over and she jerked away from him, the ring still on her finger. She frantically tried to get it off with her thumb, but her hand had become hot in her pocket and it was stuck.

  He stepped back, nodding subtly as if she’d just pulled away because she didn’t want him to touch her. “I’m sorry,” she said quickly, trying to fix the damage. “I didn’t mean to do that. I just…”

  “It’s okay,” he said. “I just wanted to see you.”

  “I’m glad,” she said with a smile, keeping her distance.

  “Call me if you want to talk. I’m always just a phone call away.”

  She nodded.

  “I’ll walk you in,” he said, peering into the car. “Is that box coming with you?”

  “Yes,” she said, her face flushing with heat at the sight of the open ring box on the seat. She willed him not to recognize it.

  He reached into the car and pulled the box out. Then he leaned back in and grabbed the ring box. “This too?” he said, not a bit of recognition on his face.

  She could hardly breathe. “Yes,” she said, in almost a whisper.

  He snapped it shut and set it into the box of Gram’s things. Then, he put his hand on her back and led her to the front door, the snow beginning to fall all around them.

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  “What do you think William would like?” Noelle asked Lucas, as they sat on the bench at the mall, drinking hot chocolates next to the giant Christmas tree. She was so glad to have the ring in a drawer in her suite, hidden from both the Harringtons and her conscience. Lucas’s feet didn’t reach the ground, his little shoes swinging above the pavement.

  “I don’t know,” he said, scratching a spot on his neck where the wool scarf that Noelle’s mother had wrapped him in was bothering him. “I’d say a good book, but he can’t read, can he?” He pondered this for a second as he held his hot chocolate. “I can’t imagine not being able to read.”

  “We could do audiobooks,” she said. “I wonder if he’d like that.”

  “Oh, that’s a good idea.”

  “But we need something for under the tree. Something we can wrap.” She stood up and Lucas hopped off the bench to stand beside her. “Let’s see what we can find.”

  They started toward a row of shops when Lucas turned excitedly to his mother. “I know! Why don’t we text Alex and ask him what to get him? He’d know for sure because he’s his grandson.”

  She didn’t want to be in contact with Alex for a variety of reasons: one, she feared he’d hear the guilt over having that ring in her voice, and two, she missed him and wanted him to come home, which would do nothing but cause him to feel awful for leaving. She also didn’t want Lucas getting any more involved than he was with Alex Harrington. Especially if he might eventually find out that it was her grandmother who’d ruined Elizabeth’s life. Carefully, she said, “I don’t know if he would.”

  “Why not? I know what Grandpa Gus likes. He likes new tools and stuff for the grill so he can have his summer cookouts. He likes that fancy barbecue sauce and he likes that really smelly lotion for his hands. Alex would probably know what his grandfather likes.”

  “But William and Alex don’t talk like you and Grandpa Gus do.”

  “May I text him? Just to see?”

  With a sinking feeling, Noelle
wondered if Lucas really wanted a chance to connect with Alex again, and she just didn’t feel like she should contact him. It wouldn’t change anything for Lucas. He wasn’t coming back.

  “Please?” he asked.

  But then again, he’d taken to Lucas. He’d be kind to him if Lucas called. “Okay,” she said with a sigh, and pulled out her phone. After all, none of this was Lucas’s fault. “Here you go.” She handed it to him and took his hot chocolate so he could text.

  With a slight pep in his step, Lucas pulled up Alex’s contact information and began texting, his little fingers flying on the keyboard. “I’m just telling him it’s Lucas and saying hi first,” he said, not looking up from the phone.

  His fingers stilled after he’d finished, and he waited for Alex to answer. Noelle prayed for those three little dots to show, alerting her that he was checking the message. Please Alex, she chanted in her head. Please don’t let him down. The screen started to go dark and Lucas tapped it to keep the text open, both of them waiting, Noelle holding her breath.

  “He might be at work,” she said, trying to soften the blow in case Alex didn’t reply, worried he wouldn’t answer. “He just got to New York. I’m sure he’s really busy. Maybe he’s not near his phone,” she added.

  Then the three dots appeared and a new wave of fear swept over her. Say something to him, she thought. Don’t leave him hanging.

  Finally, a text: Hi, Lucas! I’m glad you texted. Can I text you back tonight? I’m in a meeting right now.

  Lucas typed, Okay, and Noelle could see the disappointment on his face, but she was glad that Alex had responded. That was good enough for her. And it was sweet that he was texting him back during his meeting.

  Another text floated up: Seven o’clock tonight, just before your bedtime stories, okay? I promise.

  Lucas typed back, I can’t wait.

  After that, Lucas handed the phone back to his mother and the two of them walked quietly past the shops, looking in but not saying anything, and she wondered if they both missed Alex so much it felt like their hearts would explode. Or was that just her?

  They’d ended up getting William a new scarf and one of the candles he’d liked when Noelle and William had gone shopping together, and she’d found an audiobook about antique furniture. She thought maybe he’d like that. What she hadn’t expected to buy was a tripod for a camera. It had caught her eye, and something inside her wanted to buy it for Alex. It made no sense at all because she had no reason to buy him a thing. He’d pretty much abandoned whatever had started between them, and any future they might have even as friends was up in the air, given the ring that sat like a boulder in her bureau drawer. Besides that, she didn’t even know if it would fit his camera, even though the clerk had said it would complement any standard camera. Alex could certainly buy his own camera accessories, but she’d put it on her credit card and then asked the store to gift-wrap it.

  Lucas had been so helpful as she’d dragged him from shopping to caring for William and then to the bakery, where she’d gotten a good start painting the trim while Jim was looking after William during her free hours. She’d kept herself busy all day, trying not to focus on the discussion she had ahead of her: she’d decided that at some point, she had to tell William about the ring, and she worried that in Alex’s eyes, that knowledge of the whereabouts of the ring would put her and William on the same side of his invisible wall between them. But she knew, after hearing William’s story, that she couldn’t keep it. It had never been meant for Gram; it should be Elizabeth’s.

  Lucas was more excited today than he’d been recently, and she cringed inside, thinking it was because he knew he was going to talk to Alex tonight. She recognized that feeling easily; she’d had it too, whenever Alex would enter a room.

  So when Lucas nearly bounced into the living room of their suite after his bath, she let the worry go. Lucas deserved to enjoy this moment, and perhaps a few texts would be enough for him. Although, in the back of her mind, she knew Lucas deserved more than that.

  At seven o’clock on the dot, Lucas was holding Noelle’s phone in both hands, peering down at the screen. At 7:01, he asked, “He said seven, right?”

  “Give him a minute. He might have gotten caught up with something.” She felt jittery, worried Alex would let Lucas down. Did he realize how much this text meant to her son? She peered over at the phone: 7:03.

  Then, a text came through and relief washed over her. Lucas opened it: Sorry I’m late, buddy. Are you still up?

  Lucas’s fingers moved madly over the screen as he typed, Yes. I’m up. What are you doing?

  Why don’t we do a video chat so you can see?

  Lucas looked up at Noelle, his eyes wide with excitement. He typed Yes as she scooted next to him on the sofa.

  The phone lit up with a video call, Lucas answering immediately. Noelle couldn’t help the thrill that danced around inside her when she saw that smile on the screen.

  “Hi there,” Alex said.

  Lucas waved.

  “Let me show you something.” Alex turned his phone around and gave them a view of the entire city of New York, the skyscrapers’ lights like stars in the inky blackness.

  Lucas gasped.

  “Cool, isn’t it?” Alex said. “It’s the view from my office. I’m still working but I wanted to stop to give you a call. So, tell me. What did you do today?”

  “Oh!” Lucas said with a little bounce on the sofa, wobbling the phone. Noelle helped him steady it. “We got you a present!”

  “Lucas!” Noelle hadn’t expected him to tell Alex. She didn’t even know if she was going to give it to him.

  “Mom picked it out.”

  It was difficult to tell on the small phone screen but Alex seemed happy. “Well, I got you and your mom each something too.”

  “Tell us what mine is!”

  He laughed. “I suppose I could, since you can’t unwrap it anyway. I found a summer camp—it’s only a week long. They specialize in science experiments, and you get to take home a load of stuff including books.”

  Lucas’s face was more excited than Noelle had ever seen it as he turned to her, bouncing in his spot on the sofa.

  “Oh, that’s an awfully grand gesture.” She was certain a camp like that was probably expensive. “I couldn’t let you buy something like that for him.”

  Lucas’s smile dropped.

  “Perhaps I could try to pay for it, but it just seems too much for Alex to offer,” she told Lucas, but Alex could hear. She leaned in to the camera on the phone so Alex could see her, repeating, “I can’t let you buy a gift like that.”

  “Of course you can,” he said.

  “No. Absolutely not.” She was standing her ground on this. If Lucas loved that camp, and it was one of the best experiences of his life, he’d in turn love Alex for giving him that gift, and when time crept in between them, and Alex’s texts and calls dwindled, it would break Lucas’s heart. Best she made a memory like that come from her, even if it drained her wallet. But his gesture had given her a tiny fizzle of hope that Alex missed them. He was thinking about them, buying them presents.

  “Noelle, at least consider it,” Alex said.

  “Sure. I will. I’d love to talk to you about it,” she said, with a sudden ulterior motive. “If you come back for Christmas,” she heard herself say. She knew why she’d said it: ring or no ring, family crisis or not, she missed him terribly. She just wanted to feel those eyes on her, to see that smile directed at her.

  Alex looked at her through the screen, not saying anything.

  “Yeah!” Lucas piped up. “How else will we give you your gift?”

  “We’ll see,” he said, his face unreadable.

  Lucas frowned. “Oh no. ‘We’ll see’ always means no when Mom says it.”

  “Maybe he’ll surprise us,” Noelle said, looking straight at Alex.

  Chapter Thirty

  “I can’t believe Alex isn’t coming home for Christmas,” Phoebe said, as s
he sat the wrong way on one of the shop chairs, her arms folded on the back of it. She’d come to help Noelle with converting the bakery, and, after removing every piece of furniture in the main room for the flooring to be replaced, they’d taken a much-needed break.

  Noelle knew that Phoebe was also helping all day because she was trying to avoid having to think about the major life decisions she had to make, and Noelle understood. Phoebe had said that she and Paul had talked for hours and, in the end, he didn’t see how things could work for them right now, but it didn’t make it any easier and whenever she tried to talk it out with Noelle, she cried, so they hadn’t brought up the subject a whole lot.

  Whenever Phoebe was quiet about something, she was working through it, and this was probably the biggest decision of her life. Noelle let her think. They’d toiled all day, and it seemed they weren’t any closer to being ready. She was losing time, and they were running out of hours to get everything done. What had she been thinking? There was no way she’d get the place remodeled and stocked before New Year’s, let alone the re-opening.

  Noelle plopped cross-legged on the gritty floor. “What’s bothering me is that Alex would do something like buy Lucas a week at camp, as if it were nothing at all, but not bother to show us his affection by coming home for Christmas. Anyone can buy us things…”

  “You need to talk to him, Noelle. He might understand if you could explain it to him? The more I think about it, the more I wonder if he probably thought he was just doing something nice, and he doesn’t see the significance of coming home.”

  “I asked him to spend Christmas with us and I didn’t get an answer.” She shook her head. “I have no idea why, but something inside me tells me that he needs to be here. I have this overwhelming feeling that what he’s doing is all wrong.” She didn’t even want to mention the connection between Gram and William, or the ring, until she’d spoken to William, and she was still trying to figure out how to do that. She knew it would have to be soon because it was weighing on her.