Damaged and the Outlaw

by Bijou Hunter

  “Actually, I did. Every nail. Every curtain was all me.”

  “Once this crap with the Devils is over with, I’d like to come out here for the weekend. It’s beautiful and quiet.”

  I smiled at how damn perfect she was until she frowned at the curtains.

  “I’m buying new ones.”

  “We’ll see.”

  Raven smiled then fell silent while studying the quiet day. I set aside the broom and walked to her.

  “Is his body out there?” she asked. “I feel weird talking about curtains with a dead body not far away.”

  “He would have killed us both and gone on with his life with extra cash in his pocket.”

  “I know. I just feel weird.”

  “Don’t think about it. When ugly shit happens, you have to push it aside and think of something else. Think of tomorrow and the next day. Down under the house, I didn’t let myself panic because I knew I was spending tonight with you. I had better things to think about. You need to do that now. Think about whether we should spend the night at your place or mine. Do you want to have dinner this weekend with Lark and Aaron? Want to go bowling afterward? Think about that and not what’s outside.”

  Raven reached up and caressed my face. “I really like bowling with you. I’ll think about that.”

  Holding her against me, I kissed Raven and didn’t stop until I heard Judd’s Harley on the road. Despite our embrace and her happy bowling thoughts, she clung to me as we walked outside to meet him.

  After he got the details, Judd said Cooper and Kirk were calling a meeting. A few club guys were getting the car off the road and would dispose of the body. I needed to get back into town and drop off Raven before I met up with the Reapers leadership.

  “Should I be worried about this meeting?” I asked Judd before leaving with Raven. “Like I’ll survive it, right?”

  “Shit met the fan today, but I don’t know what Cooper will do. He’s been in a state of indecision for months. Being a husband and dad has made him fucking stupid. Either Kirk steps up to take over or Cooper pulls his head out of his ass. This shit can’t keep going on. Not with them sending killers into the Johansson hometown.”

  Judd studied Raven who was glued to me in the truck. “Take her home then get your ass to Whiskey Kirk’s. No detours or quickies.”

  “Sure, bud. I’ll find a way to nail her while driving.”

  Judd smirked, but it was Raven who made me jump by cupping my balls.

  “Really?” I asked, pulling away.

  Raven removed her hand then cuddled closer. “I don’t appreciate the term ‘nail’ when discussing our hot fucking. I’m your woman and deserve to be spoken of in a classier way. Also, I don’t want a quickie. I want to stretch out and enjoy my hero.”

  Pulling away, I said nothing while making my way down the road. Finally, I sighed.

  “I am a hero, aren’t I?”

  “Supercock. Batcock. Spidercock. Which one fits you best?”

  “Yes. I’d like to be referred to by all three preferably while I’m inside you.”

  “Can I be Wonder Pussy?”

  “Hell, darling. In my head, I already have that exact tat sketched out.”

  “Make sure my boobs look good in the tat,” she said, stroking my chest. After a moment, her mood shifted. “I’m still scared something bad is going to happen at this meeting.”

  “Kirk isn’t going to kill me after years of protecting me.”

  “Promise.”

  “I promise,” I lied.

  Maybe she knew I was guessing because Raven fell silent for the rest of the drive. Her fingers gripped my shirt, less sex kitten, more terrified little girl. Raven barely released me as we arrived at her place and walked upstairs.

  “It’ll be fine.”

  “You’re saying that because I give you hope. You’re delusional.”

  Grinning, I cupped her delicate face and studied the fear in her sky blue eyes.

  “Do I give you hope?”

  Raven’s expression immediately warmed and she smiled. “You’re more than I ever dreamed and I don’t want to let you go.”

  “You only have to let me go long enough for me to go to this meeting then head to my place to clean up. I’ll be back in a few hours to take you out for dinner and some of the sexiest bowling your pussy can stand.”

  “I have a job tonight.”

  “Cancel it,” I said and instantly she stiffened. “Babe, someone tried to kill you today. I can’t have you getting bruised up. I just can’t handle seeing that right now.”

  “I’ve won all my matches except one.”

  “Yeah, but you got bit in the first one I saw and bruised up in the second. Just let me have this.”

  “I don’t have the skills for another job, Vaughn.”

  “You can be my woman,” I said while my hands cupped her butt. “Trust me that’s a fulltime job and the hours are a pain, but the benefits are outstanding.”

  “Come back to me,” she whispered in my ear.

  “We’re going to have a lot of fun tonight. It’s a done deal.”

  Raven smiled, but her eyes were tired and afraid. Even after I kissed her breath away, she watched me leave like I was going off to my death.

  A part of me wondered if she was right. My gut said Kirk invested a lot of time and effort into protecting me and flipping off the Devils. While Cooper might be indecisive, he wasn’t going to dismiss his father’s efforts these last three years.

  The parking lot at Kirk’s was empty except for Harleys and one van for Danny. Inside, I found Tucker and Cooper whispering in a corner. Kirk sat nearby, legs stretched out, a beer in one hand and a corndog in the other. The older Johansson was enjoying his retirement evidently.

  Judd stood with Tawny at the bar while a half dozen other guys surrounded Danny’s wheelchair. Back in the day, Danny was a rough guy. He also had a long history with Kirk. When he got into a bar fight and ended up paralyzed, his friend gave him a job at the bar. I knew Danny had an old woman and a few kids in middle school. In the past, he would have once gone head first into any fight. That behavior was what cost him the use of his legs.

  Now, he waned to play things safe. Judd said it was more of an age thing than the injury. Either way, Danny was a guy who thought war with the Devils was always a bad idea. He made this clear as soon as we were all sitting around the table.

  “We can’t be sure what happens when those fuckers are dead. Do we even know who they’re tied with? Who their suppliers are? Taking out these guys could be the opening shot in a war. Do we really need that shit right now?”

  Tucker crossed his arms and glanced at his brother. “They’ve been attacking our territory for nearly a year. They turned one of our fucking guys. Now, they’ve sent a killer into our town to kill one of our guys. If we don’t hit them hard, we’re saying we’re pussies.”

  “There’s more here than ego,” Danny said, his rough voice unnaturally calm. “We have people and supply lines to worry about.”

  “How many fuckers might think about turning on us because we’re seen as weak?”

  Cooper never reacted to the rising tempers. Two seats away, Judd sat just as still, but I noticed his jaw twitching. Normally, the enforcer was unreadable. When I glanced at Tawny, I saw why Judd was grumpy. Her hands were in fists and she finally pounded them on the table.

  “Why do you keep talking about this shit?”

  Danny looked about ready to tell her to shut up. Likely, he remembered why Tawny sat in on our meetings, so he said nothing.

  “You keep talking and talking,” she said to Cooper who showed no reaction. “You want the answer to be obvious. If you do nothing while they shoot up Ellsberg, you look weak. If you shoot up Tucson and kill them, you look like a crazy fuck. Who gives a shit what the odds are of one or the other? You’re obsessed with thinking things out, but your strength isn’t you brain.”

  “Tawny…” Cooper muttered.

  “No, shut up. Do you thi
nk your pop thinks shit to death? No. He goes with his instinct and you need to the do the same fucking thing. You already know the answer. You want him to signal you the right answer. Waiting for him has made you stupid. Fuck your brain. Logic says you and Farah don’t make sense. Your instinct said otherwise. What should you listen to?”

  Cooper’s jaw relaxed. “Your sister is the hottest thing in town.”

  Tawny exhaled hard. “You’ve known what to do all along, but you think you have to listen to others and wait for your pop to give you the answer. He knows it and so do you. Just do it already.”

  Cooper stood up and glanced at his father. “We kill the fuckers.”

  Standing, Kirk stretched casually. “I’ll call Memphis.”

  Danny was clearly pissed while the other guys were nervous about starting shit with no clear end point. They wouldn’t speak up now with Cooper and Kirk on the same page. It was a done deal.

  “Are you okay?” I asked Tawny who was shaking.

  “No,” she said, walked to Judd and curling up in his lap. “Fuck anyone who judges me. If someone gives me shit, Judd will shoot them in the face.”

  Judd wrapped his arms around his woman and smiled. “I haven’t shot anyone in a couple of weeks.”

  The other guys headed outside to bitch. While the rest of us waited for Kirk to return and make the call, Tawny smiled at Cooper.

  “Sorry I called you a fucking idiot.”

  “You didn’t.”

  “Oh, in my planned speech, I did. I guess I went off script.”

  “You’re funny. Good thing your man has a trigger finger.”

  “Or what?” Tawny said, her head cradled in the crook of Judd’s neck. “You’d tell my sister you…what?”

  Cooper grinned. “Danny’s going to talk shit about you now.”

  “I’m going to talk shit about his shallow grave,” Tawny said, looking tired. “I’m glad you’re listening to your gut. You’re Kirk’s son and that makes you smart.”

  Looking more confident than I’d seen him in months, Cooper smiled. “Thanks, but how do you explain Tucker? Are you saying my mom cheated?”

  Tucker glared at his brother. “I’m his son too.”

  “Based on Tawny’s idea, you can’t be. Sorry, dummy.”

  Returning, Kirk sighed. “I never gave your mom a reason to cheat.”

  Tawny grinned. “Men are funny.” We all watched her for a minute then she sighed. “I’m on new meds and they’re making me sleepy. Maybe a little moody.”

  “Maybe?” I asked and she flipped me off.

  Kirk set the phone on the table. “I’ll do the talking and we don’t give details to anyone outside the room. I trust my guys not to snitch, but they’re fucking scared and that makes them dumber. Things have been too quiet and easy for too long and they’ve gotten whipped.”

  As Tawny dozed against Judd, I locked the door and Kirk dialed. Soon enough, a deep voice asked, “What’s up, Kirk?”

  “One of my boys got some shit on a fancy shirt and we need a cleaner.”

  “How big a stain we talking about?”

  “Big, but it’s a delicate shirt. Needs a soft touch. The guys I know would destroy the material. The stain is a pain, but we don’t want to ruin the fucking shirt, you know?”

  “Yeah, I get that. I know a few guys, but I’d think if your stain is as bad as I think, you’ll want the services of someone like Saint.”

  Kirk frowned. “When I talked to J.J. in Houston the other day, he said Saint was retired.”

  “Saint retires every year then goes on vacation and unretires. He was in South America, but I heard he’s back in Austin at one of those music festivals.”

  Kirk looked at Cooper who nodded.

  “Well, have Saint call Cooper. My boy’s running shit and I don’t want to have to unretire myself.”

  The voice on the phone told Kirk to have a nice day and it was over. Trying to disappear during the exchange, I felt awkward to be the reason the Reapers had to call in an assassin like Saint. Somewhere along the line, I’d become a bystander in my own fate.

  “I’ll talk to the guys,” Kirk told Cooper. “You make sure to keep your phone close.”

  “Thanks, Pop.”

  Kirk just grinned, proud dad helping his son hire a killer. Normal shit around the Johansson homestead apparently.

  After Kirk went outside, Cooper exhaled like he had been holding his breath the whole time. Tawny had woken up and was now stretching.

  “Coop, don’t be stupid like this again,” she said, patting his strong shoulders to the irritation of Judd. “You can handle the job. Even if you fuck up or trouble blows back on you, your club will watch your back. You’re not alone in this.”

  “I feel like some of this is coming from your sister,” Cooper said, standing up and patting her head.

  Judd finally stood between the two. “Unless you want me touching your woman, hands off mine.”

  “I love when you get all caveman,” Cooper teased. “Thanks for the pep talk, Tawny. Next time, try not to shred my balls in the process.”

  “No. If you want sweet talking, go cuddle with Farah.”

  Judd took her hand and started for the door then paused. “She’s right about people having your back, Cooper. Those guys outside want shit to be the same forever, but life ain’t like that. They’ll follow or we’ll make them follow. Either way, you’ve got the club at your back.”

  Cooper nodded then glanced at Tucker who was messing with his phone. As Judd and Tawny disappeared out the door, I joined Cooper.

  “I know what this’ll cost you,” I said as Tucker laughed at something on his phone. “I’m behind you whatever you decide. You’re my president and this is my club.”

  “If shit goes wrong, you watch out for my woman, okay? My family is yours and you make sure they’re safe.”

  “Always,” I said, shaking his hand. “I’ll die to keep them safe.”

  “Good deal,” Cooper said, suddenly looking like a twenty two year old guy.

  Walking outside, we noticed Kirk joking around with the older guys. He had a way of making his people behave. The guy knew when to use a hard stance and when to go soft. Cooper would figure it out too, but he was still a kid in too many ways. No matter his age, he just ordered the assassination of members of a rival motorcycle club.

  Chapter Twenty Three – Raven

  Showered and dressed, I sat on the little walkway outside the garage apartment. No more than thirty minutes had passed since Vaughn took off and I didn’t know how long it would be before I heard from him. When I got restless, I wanted to smoke. Right then, every nerve was on edge. I wanted to smoke and cry and chase after Vaughn. It was pretty pathetic.

  Instead, I held my Fair Bear while flicking at my lighter. I also did what Vaughn told me to do when ugly thoughts overwhelmed me. I daydreamed about our evening. I thought of bowling with him and how he always smirked when he got a strike. No matter how many times he got the strike, he always looked as if he had defeated a great foe. I loved that little grin.

  Soon, I was smiling to myself and the lighter sat unused on my lap.

  Vaughn would be fine. He was coming back to me. I’d found a good man inside a bad boy outlaw. Maybe one day, he wouldn’t be living on the edge any longer. He could truly be a part of Ellsberg, the Reapers, and our family.

  By the time Bailey came running from the house, I was chilling in the hot summer sun. She raced up the stairs then plunked down next to me.

  “You almost died,” she said, yanking me against her. “Someone tried to kill you.”

  “It’s okay, Bailey. Vaughn handled it.”

  “Were you scared?” she said, getting comfy next to me.

  “Of course. The bastard shot up Vaughn’s cabin.”

  “Are you with Vaughn or will you dump him to have a safe life?”

  Frowning, I studied her. “Was that a real question?”

  “No. I’m just uneasy because the club is having a meeti
ng and I’m not invited.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “Maybe it’s for the best. I might not want to be part of the ugly stuff. In fact, I think I want a nice man to love me and not some scary fuck like Vaughn. No offense. He’s a super hot scary fuck, but he’s still living a dark life and I don’t think I want that. I mean, I have to worry about my brothers and Pop. I don’t think I want to worry about my man coming home.”

  Remaining silent, I was nervous again. Bailey studied me then sighed.

  “I said the wrong thing, didn’t I?”

  “You said the truth. That’s not wrong and I’m not a child who needs lies.”

  “Okay. This being nice thing is hard. Lying is wrong then it’s right. I’m afraid to say anything and would totally stop talking, but I like talking. Besides, when I tried to stop talking, I forgot and talked anyway. Do you think I should try to be preppy?”

  “No, and stop trying to be someone else. I don’t know who you were before I met you, but I think you’re awesome. Anyway, if you need to ask someone if you should do something then you probably shouldn’t do it. Follow your gut and you’ll be you.”

  “Can I still get my fake boobs even though I asked if I could?”

  “You can get any damn thing you want. You’re an adult and you should decide for yourself. I’ll respect whatever you decide because I respect you. Nuff said.”

  Bailey grinned and leaned her head against my shoulder. “I’m glad you’re my friend. You’re kind of fucked up, but you seem happy. Well, right now you seem nervous, but you seemed happy with Vaughn. You love him a lot and I know he loves you a lot. I saw how he was easily bored with chicks and he doesn’t get bored with you at all. For a guy like Vaughn, that’s love.”

  “You’ll find someone too and he’ll love the Bailey I love. He’ll love the real you and you won’t have to fake shit with him. I know it’ll happen, but you need to be patient.”

  “I will be. Not because you told me to, but because it was my decision. I’m all about making my own decisions. It’s my new thing.”

  Hugging my bear, I sighed. “I hope Vaughn is okay.”

  “Pop won’t kill Vaughn. It’d make him look dumb after all he did to protect Vaughn. My pop is hella smart. Coop is too. Tucker isn’t, but he’s loyal. Vaughn will be okay.”