Beyond His Control

by Aliyah Burke

  He lay in the dark surrounded by her scent and the sound of her deep breaths. He couldn’t explain what she was doing here. All he knew is she’d come seeking him out. She needed him. And that made him smile slightly before he, too, drifted off to sleep.

  His alarm beeped rousing him from the most restful slumber he’d had in…well, he’d just assume not think about it. Shutting off the alarm, he untangled himself from the woman who seemed determined to wind herself around him. In more ways than one.

  He changed into his running clothes and once his shoes were on, he knelt by the bed. The low light in the room allowed him to stare at a still sleeping, Kami. He brushed some hair away from her face.

  “Kami,” he whispered. “Wake up, baby.”

  He didn’t blink when her thick lashes ascended exposing her sleepy dark brown eyes. “Caleb?” Her voice thick and groggy.

  A sudden burst of jealousy flared. “You in the habit of showing up to other guys’ rooms to spend the night?”

  Pain flashed before she blinked. “No,” she said softly.

  “I’m sorry, Kami. That was uncalled for. Look, I have to go. You stay here and sleep, but Kami, listen to me. Do not leave this room.” Her temper spiked, he could tell by the glint in her eyes. “No, I mean it. Stay here. Sleep. There are some snacks on the dresser. But promise me you won’t leave this room.”

  She frowned. He shook her shoulder.

  “Promise me.”

  “Okay. I can leave you know if having me here is such an embarrassment.”

  “You can’t leave because you’re not supposed to be here. Okay. This is bachelor’s quarters, Kami. Single men and geo-bats.”

  “Oh.” She gulped but gratefully nodded. He released a breath he’d not been aware he had been holding.

  He tucked the blanket up around her and brushed his lips along her cheek. “Get some more sleep. I’ll be back soon.” Her lids were already down before he even got to his feet. A gentle smile crossed his face; he knew she’d been out again before he made it downstairs.

  He didn’t want to leave her. But, he had things to do. Fastening the reflective belt around his waist, he grabbed his keys, rolled his shoulders, and headed off to meet up with the others for their morning run.

  After the fifteen miles was done, he hurried back to his room. Kami still slept. He showered quickly and watched her as he buttoned up his uniform blouse. She seemed at peace, something that had been missing when he saw her last night.

  Soft sharp breaths emerged from her pouty lips. All he could envision was her before him on her knees, his shaft sliding in and out of her wet mouth, those lips curved around his length. He grunted as he hardened. Turning his back on her didn’t really seem to quell any of his raging desire. What he would love to do to her after she finished sucking on him. How it would feel to be buried balls deep inside her hot slit.

  His pants felt tighter. Shaking off the image of peeling Kami’s clothes from her body and learning everything about her, he bent down to put on his boots, then his blousing straps and made sure the leg blooms fell right. He stole another look at her before slipping out the door, his cover in hand.

  The day dragged and when he had been relieved, he hurried for the door.

  “Caleb! Wait up.”

  He turned to find a friend from his unit hurrying over. “What’s up, Josh?”

  “Heading down to Trawlers, you coming?”

  It was on the tip of his tongue to say no but he figured Kami would probably want to eat something more than what he had in his place. Then he could get her in a hotel and find out what the hell she truly was doing here. And why she wanted to see him.

  “Yeah. I have a friend in town, so I’ll bring her with.”

  Josh lifted his brows. “Her?”

  He ignored the wave of possessiveness that swarmed him. “Yes, her. Just…be nice and respectful when you meet her.”

  Josh winked. “You know me,” he said sauntering off.

  “That’s why I said what I did,” Caleb hollered after him.

  Back at his building, he paced in the elevator as it took him up to the eighth floor. He nodded at another man who entered as he disembarked. With deep breaths, he made his way toward his room only to pause outside it. Shaking his head at his actions, he pushed through and closed the door behind him. She wasn’t there. His heart pounded in his chest.

  She’d promised him to stay there. Where’d she go?

  “Kami?”

  The door to his bathroom opened and she stepped through, wrapped in his bathrobe. The thing was huge on her, swallowing her up as if she were a sprite or pixie. Her honeyed-blonde hair darker with remnants of her shower. It was a stab to his gut. One of sharp awareness and sexual longing.

  “Hi,” she muttered. “Sorry about stealing your robe but you told me not to leave and my bag is in the car.”

  She’d not left. “I’ll go get it for you.” He grabbed her keys. “Be right back.” And bolted. When he returned, she sat on the edge of his bed, still enveloped in his robe. He put the bag by her feet and cleared his throat.

  “I’ll be out in a minute,” she said slipping back into the bathroom.

  True to her word she was. She wore an off the shoulder blue top and some white cargo pants. She’d pulled her damp hair back into a ponytail. He stared without aplomb as she sat back down and leaned over to strap on her shoes, exposing her breasts to him.

  Fuck me! He clenched a fist and turned his head away. Staring at the wall, he skimmed his teeth with his tongue. “I thought you might want to go out and eat. And we can get you a hotel room.”

  There was no response. Truthfully, he’d expected something, but what, perhaps a moue of disappointment? He rotated back around and found her approaching, bag in hand.

  “Let’s go,” she said, her tone sounded defeated.

  He relieved her of her bag and walked her to the elevator. They weren’t the only ones in there and he smiled at the others before putting his attention on her. He embroiled her in mundane talk during the ride down. At her car, he blocked her between him and the vehicle. “Follow me.”

  Like she had before, she nodded and slipped behind the wheel. Soon he was leading her from base to military lodging and wondering what the hell he was going to do.

  * * *

  Kami observed from behind her mirrored shades at Caleb as he entered the bar beside her. He’d gotten her at room at a Navy Lodge before loading her into his truck and bringing her here. The music was loud and had been noticeable even before they entered. Her breath left her with a whoosh as she noticed all the good-looking men in the establishment.

  “Caleb!”

  She slid her glance in the direction the name had been hollered to see a guy waving from one side of the bar.

  “Come on,” Caleb said in her ear, his warm breath brushing the side of her face.

  Without a word, she followed him, increasingly aware of some scantily attired women who called out his name with disgusting familiarity. She fought back the urge to snap at them. He stopped by the other group who had occupied a large table and she waited while he shared a handshake with the men and called the women by name.

  One man gestured with his chin at her. “Who’s your friend?”

  Caleb pressed his hand on the small of her back, encouraging her closer. Closer to him and the group.

  “Guys, this is Kamden. Kam, meet the guys.”

  Her heart sank at his use of Kam. He introduced them all; each one shook her hand and said it was a pleasure to meet her. Until the last one. The tanned man with gray eyes, Josh was his name. He continued to hold onto her hand.

  “You look familiar, have we met?”

  She lifted her brows and fought the urge to laugh the line was so corny. “No,” she replied smoothly, increasingly aware of the terseness radiating from Caleb. Could he be jealous?

  “Really? You seem familiar to me.”

  “Josh,” Caleb growled.

  “No, give me a sec.” Josh gri
nned and snapped his fingers. “I got it.” He leaned close. “You’re Lane Strong’s daughter.”

  Shit.

  The rest of the group moved close at his whispered proclamation; shock evident on their faces. Before any of them could speak, Caleb did. His tone low and a complete command.

  “No one says a word about that.”

  They all stared at him. Damn if they didn’t all nod however. Caleb rested his palm against her back; the heat singed her though the thin cotton of her shirt. Following his silent directive, she slid onto a stool at the table. He hauled one up and wedged in beside her. Their knees touched and she swallowed hard, determined to make it through without coming across as an idiot.

  “So,” Josh said, reaching for his beer and sliding the chips and dip in her direction, “how’d Caleb get lucky enough to meet you?”

  She smiled. “Our mothers are best friends. We saw each other quite a lot when we were kids.”

  Immediately they launched a litany of questions toward her about how Caleb was a child. She sent him a smug grin, totally ignoring his retaliatory warning look and popped a chip in her mouth. She heard Caleb order food, but she was far to busy regaling the group with stories to pay him much attention. Yet when the food arrived, she was pleasantly surprised with the choice he made for her. It looked delicious and smelled even better.

  “Cranberry lemonade,” he said sliding her drink closer.

  She flashed him a grin and dug in.

  “What do you do, Kam?” Josh asked as he ate a big bite of his burger.

  Swallowing her food, she washed it down with a drink. “I’m a doctor.”

  They all stared at her. “Dr. Strong?” She nodded. Josh gave a low whistle, echoed by those around him. “I’m impressed. Or is it I’m in love,” he teased.

  She smiled while they laughed. In the next second however, she almost choked on her next bite when Caleb’s strong leg pressed tight along hers. Under the guise of looking around, she watched his face. Nothing out of the ordinary.

  The camaraderie between all there amazed her and she was infinitely glad Caleb had seen fit to include her. It was nice to relax and enjoy being out.

  Not like I gave him a choice though. Just showed up.

  “Tell me something, doc,” Larson said from her right.

  “What?” She watched the blond PFC and drank from the straw.

  “Tell us something about Styx here that we wouldn’t know.”

  Styx. She loved the nickname he’d gotten in the Corps. “Let’s see.”

  “Hang on now,” Caleb argued, nudging her lightly in the side.

  She smirked at him. “What? They were talking to me. Not you.” Warnings flared. Waving him off she faced Larson again. “Hmm. Do you know about the…nope, probably do.” She shrugged. “He was older. Mean really.”

  Larson guffawed. “That I believe.”

  Under the table, he cupped her thigh. Right above the knee. Cotton exploded up in her mouth, making short work of the moisture there until it had been soaked up with swift efficiency. She struggled to remain coherent of the conversation and not succumb to the heat his mere touch created in her. By the time, he’d ordered dessert she was near the end of her rope.

  He removed his hand when the plates of dessert arrived. She did her very best to not dwell on the fact she missed that same touch which had created such havoc within her. With a pleased sigh, she stared at the piece of triple layer carrot cake.

  “Hope you still like it,” Caleb murmured in her ear, his hand brushing the small of her back.

  Just another brief bit of contact. One which made her immeasurably all the more aware of her. Fleeting it vanished almost before it registered but the effect on her…lacked even a sloth’s ambition in its retreat.

  “Kami?”

  She fisted her fork and cut off a bite. “I do. It…it looks divine.”

  His gaze travelled over her face. Slowly. Almost searchingly. As if he sought to see if she lied. With a smile, she ate the cake and forced her attention on something other than Caleb Zachary Moser.

  After the meal, they played pool and darts. She’d stifled a yawn when she noticed Caleb watching her. Again. He’d done a lot of that over the course of the evening. He didn’t ask, just put down the darts he held in his hand and made his way to her side. She paid attention to the way he stood by her—protective almost.

  “Night, y’all.” He spoke loud enough to be heard over the increasing din.

  No one argued or made comments about them leaving so early but she could read the assumptions in their eyes. Not that she minded given the need she had for Caleb, one that drew her out here.

  Before farewells were finished, another voice broke in. “Oh my God! You…you’re Kamden Strong, Lane Strong’s daughter.”

  She tensed.

  “You remember, the country superstar singer, Lane. His daughter was kidnapped in Taiwan and her fiancé murdered. Her friend too.”

  “Oh yeah, I remember now.”

  And her belly clenched and rolled as the cacophony grew louder with each heartbeat. She hated being the center of attention. Any attention. And she hated how casually they threw around the deaths of Evan and Missy. Instinctively and without thought, she sidestepped and brought herself closer to Caleb’s powerful body.

  She didn’t know how he did it but one second, she faced a crowd of nosy and inquiring faces. The next…a wall of solid marine flesh surrounded her and Caleb. He took her hand in his and for a moment, the surrounding chaos faded into nothingness. All that mattered was the strength and feel of him. His large hand surrounded hers, dwarfing her own, showing her yet again how it felt to be safe.

  As she had in the mountains of Taiwan, she embraced the safety he gave her. All the men, and women, moved together. A unified front and got her the hell out of there to Caleb’s truck. She despised releasing his hand and only after a severely delayed response time did she.

  Farewells were swift but they made her promise to return for another visit. Then they were gone, driving away into the night. Her heart pounded hard, palms sweated until she dragged them across her thighs.

  This isn’t Taiwan, she reminded herself. No one was chasing her. Still, she couldn’t slow the pounding of her heart, nor the rapidness of her breaths. They were sharp and shallow. She could feel Caleb’s gaze upon her, yet he said nothing. When he parked his truck, her hands shook so bad it took three attempts to unbuckle the belt. His perceptive stare penetrated clear to her soul and she shook off how it affected her.

  He paced beside her taking they key from her continued trembling hand and unlocked the door to the room. Inside, he gripped her shoulders and backed her against the closed door. Surprised by his action she regarded him with a bit of caution. There existed a decided tic in his clenched jaw, his entire body radiated tension and his eyes—those incredibly rich kingfisher blue eyes—had darkened with rage.

  “Why the hell didn’t you tell me?” he growled.

  She stood in silence; her gaze adhered to his. There was no denying him, she knew that. Nor did she want to.

  “I didn’t think it would matter,” she whispered succinctly, refusing to allow herself to release his embroiled stare.

  Chapter 9

  Caleb had always believed himself a fair man. Not horribly prone to rash actions. He had a good head on his shoulders, respected his elders and women. But damn if he didn’t long to wrap his hands around Kami’s throat and shake her.

  I didn’t think it would matter.

  Six words. Grinding his jaw, he stared at the woman trapped between him and the door. He could see the exhaustion in her expression. It hid behind her façade of everything was fine. She couldn’t hide it from him. Also mixed in there lingered fear.

  Fear of what? He knew the answer as soon as he conjured the question.

  How could she not tell me she’s been having nightmares?

  It explained how come she had curled into him last night and slept after muttering about being safe.
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  He longed to sink his hands into her hair and kiss every inch of delectable skin on her body. Need, deep rooted and blinding with its intensity roared through him. With a muttered curse, he spun around and stalked to the bathroom where he slammed the door so hard it rattled on its hinges. He banged his hands onto the counter, grateful for the sting to distract him, no matter how short the respite, and struggled to regain control. It wasn’t to be for such a feat proved irretrievable. Futile.

  “Kami,” he groaned. She was killing him.

  She should be off limits. He shouldn’t be here. She should be on the first flight he could put her on back to Tennessee. He should do a lot of things. And not one of them should be what he currently contemplated.

  As he splashed cold water on his face, he recalled this identical action on the plane with her. He stared at himself, challenge present. There was no running away this time.

  Kami deserved someone who— He couldn’t even complete the thought. The mere idea of Kami in another’s arms, being touched, kissed, caressed, tasted…made him livid and tremble with unchecked fury.

  He wasn’t right for her. He should push her away. He should advise her to stay away. He should treat her as family, as he’d always done and stop thinking of her as not just a woman but his woman.

  He knew. In the deepest part of his soul, he knew he should.

  Trouble was, he didn’t know if he could.

  With a deprecating groan, he stepped back into the room. Only one light remained illuminated. Kami sat on the lone queen sized bed, cross-legged. Beside her rested her mp3 player and some speakers. The room filled with classical music.

  He leaned against the doorjamb and paid attention to how as the seconds ticked by, her entire physique relaxed bit by bit. Nothing huge but he noticed.

  The music soothed her soul. He moved along the edge of the room, watching her but needing to see her face. With the finish of one piece, another started and as he kept vigil, he beheld her playing along, as if she held a violin in her hands.