Balancer's Soul

by H. Lee Morgan, Jr

Imbalance and Balance

  When Sarah’s mother and father eventually told Connor that he had passed each of their tests, she suddenly became nervous and deathly afraid of what was about to come next. “It really is time to do this. I thought I was prepared after all this time, but at this moment its frightening… Connor, I won’t be angry if you run away after knowing about my family’s secret, but please don’t hate me for what I am. Please…”

  Connor wove his fingers between hers after she began drawing her hand away from his back. Then Sarah realized that her body trembled all over because their hands were the only things that weren’t fidgeting in expected fear. It made her become self-conscious of her reactions, but grateful for his solid grounding. He looked at her in a special way that said ‘Everything will work out so stop shaking.’ The vibrations of her body ceased instantly after he smiled her favorite smile.

  “Connor, it is time for you to know exactly what we are.” Jillian leaned forward seriously to emphasize her meaning. “We are of an ancient race of immortal beings, better known as Balancers!”

  Connor looked up at the ceiling and mumbled “Balancers… Balancers… Balancers… BALANCE!” He lowered his head and his eyes were fixated on Sarah’s. “The very first day we met and I was explaining in class how I told time, I said something about balance being nature’s one true law. You looked at me almost dangerously. Then I felt you trying to search through my thoughts. Were you trying to see if I knew what you were?” He questioned seriously.

  “Yes, and to see if you were a threat to me or my family.” Sarah spoke quietly and honestly, knowing she didn’t have anything to hide from him anymore.

  “Now I understand…” Still looking at her he calmly said “And when you told Jack about me, he was drunk and furious about you not being able to get a read on me, right? That’s why you fled off into the woods, to take his attention off of me and focus it all on yourself.” All she could answer with was a weak nod.

  ‘Ahem.’ Jillian cleared her throat in minor annoyance, they were in their personal world again and forgot about her parents presence momentarily. It didn’t last long, but they returned to the conversation. Jillian was getting rather annoyed so Connor and Sarah broke the bubble to look back at her oddly hesitant mother. “May I continue the story?”

  “I’m sorry. Jillian, please continue.” Connor said apologetically.

  Jillian slid even closer to her one true love and he didn’t want it any other way. She laid her hand down on his thigh gently while Jack laid his arm around Jillian’s lower back, to hold her hip. She looked up at him and they both smiled. They smiled the same way Connor and Sarah smile at each other, with love, admiration and desire. Sarah finally understood what it was like to truly be in love.

  Jillian began the ancient story that Sarah had been told as a child many centuries ago. “In a time long forgotten, there were and still are three ancient and powerful immortal races. The Keepers were the very first and they are better known today as dragons. They are the keepers of knowledge and ultimate power. The third race came to be aptly named Changers and they have the ability to manipulate their physical bodies into anything they need or want. The second race of immortals are we Balancers, Connor.” Jillian pointed to herself and Sarah to emphasize a point.

  “Balancer’s have the ability to control the elements of nature to do as we see fit. We are called Balancers because everything needs some kind of balance within our world, but especially with us.” Jillian answered Connor’s questioning expression. “Think of it this way; if you’re cold, you look for a place to get warm right? It’s your body’s way of regulating itself, trying to find its ideal balance.” Connor nodded, understanding the balance she simplified, but knew it was much more complex and subtle. “Well, some of us are capable of taking the energy from our surroundings and envelope ourselves in the heat to keep from freezing to death.”

  “I’m beginning to understand. Go on.” “He wants to know more? Why does he look so calm? Can he take our words so easily as truth?”

  “No more about that for now. I need to continue the story.” Taking a needed breath Jillian went on by saying “All Balancers are always born female and are immortal themselves...”

  Connor cut in quickly. “But! What about you Jack? Aren’t you a Balancer? Aren’t you immortal?”

  “Indeed I am, but let Jillian finish son before you irritate her anymore.” Speaking ominously was one of Jack’s strengths, but he smiled at the justice of interrupting Jillian. That is something she excels at, but gets frustrated when she is the one interrupted. Sarah could tell it was payback from Jack to Jillian, for the surprise he received.

  Squeezing her hand into his, Connor understood to let Jillian finish because she is of the impatient personality. She is almost like Connor’s little sister. Sometimes it’s best to let them get what they need to say out of their system.

  “Yes, Connor, all Balancers are only born female. As such, we are imbalanced. Our powers are severely limited… as you’ve already noticed how the headaches manifest when she tries using her abilities. Those are the physical ramifications and signs of an imbalanced female. Our powers need to be balanced and since we are all female there is only one way to find that perfect balance. We need to find a male mate, to find an equilibrium within ourselves! It is the only way to reach our true potential.

  “Our mates must be smart, strong and be in love with us for the right reasons. We don’t do one night stands. When we find our mate, they too become immortal and they also gain abilities of their own. Once mated, a female’s abilities become stronger and the painful cost of using our skills become nonexistent. As mates, we bring a harmonious balance to each other; woman to man and man to woman. We are but two parts of a whole, as it has always been. We are unable to read our mate’s mind, but we can always sense their moods and where they are at at any given time. We can find them just like a personal tracking beacon or a GPS, but with better accuracy.” She answered Connor’s unasked question by adding “We are bound together forever, throughout time. Being immortal there is also a price, Balancer females cannot birth large families, otherwise we’d overrun humanity in several decades. Usually a mated pair have no more than two or three daughters. To this date my knowledge tells of a mated pair having a total of six children, but that is the greatest number a Balancer mother has ever been bestowed. Those are the limitations we females are faced with. We are born with very few eggs, so to have a big family is impossible.” Jillian glanced sadly at Jack and Connor immediately noticed the exchange.

  “What happened?” His voice turned quiet and somber.

  Jack spoke softly for his mate who became too choked up to speak at the moment. “Sarah is our third and final daughter. Jillian no longer has any eggs on her ovaries, so we can no longer conceive. Sarah has only one other living sister. Her name is Amber.” Steadying himself wasn’t easy because this story always pained them. “Our first daughter, Pearl, and her mate were killed in an avalanche about three hundred and fifty years ago, as they slept in their home. They lived in the mountains together. At that time Jillian, Amber and I lived an hour away, but by the time we came over a week later we saw the aftermath. We found them and buried them together, but it is never easy to see your child die, no matter how long we live.” He looked at Jillian, revealing little more than a painful setting in his eyes at recalling this story. “If only they were awake, they could have stopped the avalanche or gotten away.”

  “I’m sorry for your loss.” Sarah squeezed Connor’s hand as an appreciative gesture for the sincerity in his voice.

  Jack continued saying “Thank you, Connor. Just know that as Balancers, thought we are technically immortal we are not invincible by any means. We are still very much human. We can die the same as you; like from poison, stabbing, blood loss, suffocation, drowning and so on.” Looking at Connor seriously, he took his arm from around Jillian’s back and leaned forward. “Know this. There is one Big rule to being a Balancer that cannot be
taken lightly.”

  Connor let go of Sarah’s hand and he too leaned forward and set his predatory gaze on her father. Mother and daughter shared a quick glance at each other and hoped a fight wouldn’t erupt between their men. Breaking the tension, Connor asked evenly “What is it I must understand?”

  “If either the man or woman dies, their partner dies as well. No matter where they are, if one dies the other will follow immediately. Our lives are irrevocably chained to each other. It is simply another part of the balance. There is no other option for us, once mated.” He spoke in an intimidating way.

  “You mean if you were killed, Jillian would die as a result?” Connor sounded appalled at hearing this, but his expression remained neutral.

  “Yes.” Jillian said quietly while pulling Jack back in the seat.

  Connor leaned back on the sofa, laid his head on the headrest and sighed. “It gives a whole new meaning till death do you part.”

  “Where do you think that saying originated from?” Jack said sarcastically.

  Connor then changed the whole mood of the room. He turned his head to see Sarah watching his every move and expression. He asked her innocently “How does one become a male Balancer?” He finished by wearing her favorite smile and as a result she forgot how to blink.

  Sarah’s heart went from stammering to beating furiously and she felt her face flame red hot. “He just had to ask that now…” Tearing her eyes away from his innocent question, Sarah looked at her mother to plead for help. Jillian was honestly trying her very best not to smile and it was obviously not working. She sincerely enjoyed her child’s discomfort a little too much. “Connor, why did you ask this in front of my parents?”

  She looked down in embarrassment, and then Sarah heard Jillian’s embarrassing remark. “Look how self-conscious and innocent she is, Jack. She is over three hundred years old and still so bashful. Look…her face is sooo red! Oh look it’s getting even redder now.” Jillian then started laughing and couldn’t stop herself. What became more mortifying, Jack had chuckled as well.

  Looking up to see Connor’s reaction, Sarah stopped halfway at his shoulder and hoped he wasn’t smiling. She sucked in a silent breath and eventually bridged the gap to meet his expression. Seeing his face, she noticed that he sat completely still and was waiting patiently for an answer. He wasn’t paying any attention to her mother and the perverted remarks.

  Still blushing wildly, Sarah summoned up her courage to tell him the honest truth, without being descriptively blunt. “Connor, to become a male Balancer there is a simple ceremony that we must do…together.”

  “Together? I thought we were already together?” Connor asked and still looked confused. Jillian starts another fit of robust laughter and began stamping her feet on the wooden floor while clutching her sides.

  In a shy and quiet voice Sarah had to spell it out for him “Connor, the ceremony can only be done when our bodies are joined as one… We must…mate.” She barely managed to squeak the last word aloud and forced herself to look down at his hand resting at his side.

  After Jillian quieted down from her last laughing fit, Sarah looked up to see that Connor’s head leaned back on the headrest again and his eyes were closed. Moments later he leaned his head forward and opened his eyes to look at Sarah. “Thank you so much for letting me in on your secret, Princess…”

  Jack interrupted what he was about to say and asked “Connor, now that you know about us being Balancers, will you take Sarah as your mate?”

  Very slowly and clearly he met Jack’s stare directly and said “No.”

  Instantly heartbroken, Sarah leaned away from him and stared at her quivering hands. “I thought so. I knew it, I’m a freak and he doesn’t want me… He couldn’t be with someone like me…”

  Jillian turned deathly quiet, but Jack was anything but. The atmosphere turned malevolently warm and Sarah could almost feel her father’s rage as he slowly said “What did you say?”

  In the same voice he reiterated “I said, No, Jack.” He continued saying in a calm voice “Before you try and kill me, let me explain my reasoning.” He took a slow and deep breath, in a calm voice he ordered “Sarah, please look at me.”

  “I can’t, I’m sorry, but I just can’t. It’s too hard…” Her eyes start to water, making her vision become blurry and she shook her head because she couldn’t bring herself to look into his eyes again.

  Sarah soon felt a gentle hand under her chin and Connor tilted her head to look up at him. His face held a calm yet painful mask. “Sarah, now that I know you’re secret, I know that I want to be with you forever, but…” He took a deep breath and sighed it all out slowly. “It is time that I showed you my secret as well so that you will understand my position.”

  It became her turn to be speechless while trying to keep her tears from spilling over.

  Connor stood silently.

  As he began towering over Sarah, she looked up into Connor’s face and saw a mask that transformed into one unreadable and passionless. It was honestly the scariest expression he’s ever shown. She’d take his violent look over this one anytime. He slowly walked a few steps away from them and turned his back to Sarah. Taking a few slow breaths made his massive shoulders rise and fall, Connor steadied himself by saying “Ok.”

  Grabbing both sides of his shirt at his waist, he slowly pulled off his shirt. When it slid completely off, Sarah got her first good look at the true physique of his body that had always been covered and concealed.

  Connor’s back was even more massive than she could have ever imagined. Muscle layered every inch of his massively wide back similarly to that of a heavyweight boxer, but fat seemed nonexistent on his frame. It seemed as if the face of some deadly creature stared directly at the Branderson family from how the muscles bulged even when relaxed. The bulges seemed more eerie as the light coming in through the window casted ridges to the knots like mountains. His shoulder blades held muscles so defined that it looked like menacing eyes while his lower back muscles showed the facial features. This was not the muscles of an ordinary person. These muscles were that of a god in living flesh. His physique showed how much he’s trained and even bodybuilders would have an impossible time achieving such a complex musculature that nature envisioned. His muscles started where Sarah could see, from his belt line, all the way up to the base of his skull. Connor’s arms were even more fit than she ever thought to be possible in a man of nineteen years of age. If she didn’t see this for herself, she’d reason that his physique was fake or cosmetically altered. The muscles he was layered in were enormous and would put even the Greek Gods to shame.

  Then he started to slowly turn around.

  Turning very slowly, Jillian and Jack saw whatever this secret before she could. All of the malice in the room, that had been emanating from her father disappeared, in an instant. Jack’s restrained anger was replaced by wide eyes and a barely open jaw. As her mother saw it, her hand shot to her mouth saying “Oh my...” and Jillian rarely gets shocked. Sarah felt even more afraid than she had all day. worrying about how he would react to hearing about Balancers became nothing compared to the worry she felt after hearing her mother’s reaction.

  Connor kept turning slowly towards Sarah.

  When Sarah finally saw Connor’s bare chest, it took her breath away.

  Connor’s torso was so well muscled that it could have only been achieved by a lot of unorthodox hard work and physical labor. Touching his muscles through fabric was one thing, but seeing them in the bare flesh, without a covering became an altogether different experience. Knotted and perfectly symmetrical muscles filled his mid and lower abdominals. Everything about him seemed to have been created out of a dream of the ideal man. His front side was even more remarkable than his chiseled arms and back. Large pectoral muscles flexed on their own as he finally stopped turning. His hairless, sculpted chest proved that he had a great lung capacity, but what laid on his chest made Sarah’s heart stop.

  Starting from bo
th sides of his shoulders, and crossing once all the way to wrap around his ribs was a solid black X perfectly centered on his sternum. It looked like an incredible tattoo, but after a second, closer glance proved it to not be a tattoo at all. Tattoos don’t leave the skin glossy with melted scar tissue. The mark clearly had been seared onto the flesh because Sarah has seen melted flesh before, but the shape, design and application were too uniform. The X was perfect, showing it was done all at once, but she didn’t know if it were intentional or not.

  Not relieved that Connor’s eyes were closed, Sarah stood up out of the seat, almost in a trance. She unconsciously started walking up to where Connor stood. She carefully touched the very center of his sternum, where the lines crossed.

  The lines were four fingers wide, from golden tan skin to black mark and back to skin again. The skin no longer revealed any sweat glands and seemed uniform. She touched the center of his chest again, but this time with the palm of her right hand, it felt almost like rubbing the surface of rubber. She looked up at Connor and he continued wearing the expressionless mask and eyes were still closed tightly, trying to remain oblivious to their scrutiny. “Connor, please tell me what happened to have caused this?” She asked softly and tenderly.

  His eyes slowly opened to meet hers. Hazel eyes looked almost like she wasn’t standing directly in front of him; they were unfocused and somewhere else altogether. “Do you remember when you met Granddaddy and he told you what he does for a living?”

  Remembering the day that she met Connor’s family for the first time, she quickly remembered David’s story about what he does. “Your grandfather is a metal worker or black smith, right?”

  “Exactly.” Sarah continued to stare into those gentle hazel eyes as he recounted his story in a hollow tone. “The accident that left this mark took place when I was fourteen years old. That summer, I was working with my granddaddy at his forge. I was hammering some metal rivets and support bars into the correct shape while Granddaddy was quenching a cross-beam with his specially blended black Ink. That is his trademark.” Connor looked up and added this for her parents sake. “The metal was still red hot and steaming of the ink when he put it on a drying rack to cool and let the ink be absorbed.

  “And then the secured bolts holding the rack up on the wall suddenly broke loose from the ceiling. I still haven’t figured out how it fell.” He cleared his throat to continue with his story. “I was facing the wobbling cooling rack, but Granddaddy’s back was to it. He and I were wearing ear plugs because of my loud hammering so he didn’t sense the danger about to drop on him. I knew he would not be able to hear me yell at him and wouldn’t have been able to react quickly enough to dodge, even if he had. Luckily, I reacted first and didn’t think about it. I ran at him as quickly as I could and pushed him out of the way. Then the half-ton cross-beam dropped. The hot cross-beam pinned me to the ground instead of him.” Sarah shuddered just trying to imagine the intensity of his pain and she laid her other palm on his massive chest as he continued.

  “I awoke about a week later in the hospital’s PICU. As I became more lucid, I looked down and saw that my chest was completely wrapped up in gauze. I still couldn’t move due to the excruciating pain.” Sarah could only imagine what he went through and the pain he had to endure. “Granddaddy, told me later about what happened. I had third degree burns from where the cross-beams incinerated my shirt and seared into my skin. The quenching ink that my granddaddy used became like a permanent tattoo as it permeated into my flesh. And the weight and force from the beams that landed on me cracked five ribs and gave me a hairline fracture on my sternum. If it were anyone else they wouldn’t have survived the weight and searing heat. My granddaddy told me ‘I’m so sorry son. You blacked out due to the pain being too great.’ Because of the accident, I lost a year of school and was held back, that’s why Kara and I are both seniors. After the accident, I vowed to never be weak or slow for as long as I live, and to always protect others who cannot do so themselves.”

  Connor finished with his story and became still. Sarah began to silently cry for all the pain he has endured and had bore alone for all these years. “I now understand a little of your pain.” She reasoned with his secret and said “Is this the reason you always wear dark long sleeves? Not only to show off your Godly muscles, but to cover up your X as well? You think you’re a freak compared to others?”

  “That’s why.” Confirming her questions wasn’t difficult for him now.

  For no reason in particular she looked down to the center of his chest which stood to her eye level and she kissed the center of his sternum softly.

  Moments later she looked up at him to see that he became rigid. “Now that I know your secret, Connor, I can tell you I’m in love with you as well.” His eyes began to burn with happiness, love, passion and most of all relief. His mask had vanished and she hoped to never see that haunting expression again.

  Connor slowly leaned down while she meet him by standing on the tips of her toes. For the very first time they kissed each other on the lips. His kiss seared through every cell in her body, like molten lava in an unstoppable volcanic eruption. Need and want streaked through her like never before. Her toes started curling and her body went through rapture. Sarah reached around his head and entwined her fingers in his sandy blonde hair to deepen the experience. He returned the gesture by enfolding her in his massive arms around her lower back and drew her closer. They pressed into each other, almost melding together. Her first true kiss felt more amazing than she dared dream, nearly shattering the core of her whole existence. Her love and his were now in harmony.

  Every part of her ached to be with him from her head all the way down to her toes and especially some parts that wanted him to take her right then and there.

  With everything going on in their personal world Sarah heard an annoyed voice say “We are still in the room, young lady.” Jack spoiled the mood.

  Untangling her hands from around his head, she turned around, remaining in Connor’s embrace. His arms were now crossed under her breast and his hands held her ribs gently while her back pressed to his abdomen. He looked down as she stared up at him in relieved happiness.

  Sarah chanced a glance towards her mother several seconds later to see a joyful look in her golden eyes. She was sparkling with pride as her hand pressed over her heart, but she said nothing.

  “Connor, will you be the mate of our precious daughter?” Jack started getting impatient as he repeated his question again.

  Connor looked evenly at him. “I’m not going to answer you.”

  Before Jack could react or say anything, Connor spun Sarah around to look at him, face to face. Getting down on both of his knees, Connor looked her in the eye with another one of his soul shattering gazes. “Sarah. Will you have me as your mate, lover and husband for all eternity? Even with the large deformity on my chest?”

  Struck speechless at hearing those words, she couldn’t say a word, but she instead showed him the reply. Sarah tackled him to the floor and he landed on his back. She laid atop him and kissed him passionately and fiercely. She didn’t care where she was because only one thing mattered, after all these centuries she found her mate.

  When she let him speak again he moved a few hairs out of her face and tucked them behind her ears. “Is that a yes?” He then held up her chin to look at him still laying flat on the floor.

  “Yes! Forever, Connor. My answer is Yes!” She could finally speak again. “I have never been happier in my whole life.”

  As Conner and Sarah sat up, she looked around the room to notice her parents. Jillian leaned her shoulder on Jack’s ribs and he had his arm wrapped around his mate’s back. They were both looking at them wearing a smile of congratulations. They accepted him now as family.

  Connor stood Sarah up as her mother could no longer contain her excitement “Sarah, my dear, you have finally found your mate. I’m so very proud.” Jillian walked away from Jack and embraced her youngest in a rocking hug. />
  After an hour of talking about nothing in particular, Connor’s shirt found its way back on again. Jillian eventually asked “When are you going to do the final ceremony? Tonight? A week? When?” She was wearing another perverted grin again and Sarah flushed.

  Connor rescued her again by saying “Jillian, there are a few things I need to take care of before we go that far.”

  “What kind of things.” She was still grinning.

  “It is a secret!” He glanced at Sarah with a wry smile.

  “What secret?” Sarah asked suspiciously. “You’re going to keep a secret from me now? Are you going to make a habit out of this?”

  “No, no. How about this then, it will be a surprise.” Smiling her smile made her resolve falter. It always had and now, always will.

  “I just cannot say no to that smile of yours. Can I help with anything you’re planning?” Sarah asked truthfully while wringing her hands nervously. Connor grabbed her ankle and immediately let go, in response to her words.

  Then his brow furrowed just before his head whipped in a new direction. “Jillian, get out of my head! I didn’t give you permission.”

  Jillian laughed, saying “You’re right, sorry about that.”

  Connor took a long look at Sarah and kept smiling. He was thinking about something and it seemed important. “Sarah, I will be back for you, but this will take me a month or so.”

  “You’re leaving me?” Her insecurity set in instantly.

  “Yes, but I am also going to take time off from school. Don’t worry, it will be worth it. You’ll love what I have planned for you. So if anyone asks where I am just tell them that I’m out touring different colleges. Ok?”

  “Ok.” Sarah said, smiling the best she could.

  He leaned in and kissed her lips again. She wanted so much more than that, but he pulled away to say “I love you, Princess. I’ll be back just as soon as I can.” Connor turned to her parents, who still sat together on the loveseat. “Please keep an eye on her while I’m away.”

  “Will do, Connor.” Jillian actually saluted him.

  “You have my word.” Jack never breaks his word when he spoke in that tone.

  Connor stood and left the Branderson house without another word. “Don’t worry, Sarah.” She looked at her father who spoke “Whatever he is up to, I know now that he is a good young man. He has my blessing.”