Eagle Down (Cyber Cowboys Series Book 3)

by M Elle Kelso

  “Right. I’ll get the coffee.”

  As he headed for the door, he heard Blake placing the call. He hoped Jared wasn’t too annoyed, but if they were all trying to do the same thing, they might as well all be working together, not running into each other as they crossed paths.

  By the time Blake, Jared and Mac had shared all of the information each one had they at least knew where C.J. was and they had made a guess about what David wanted with Mac. The one piece of information Mac withheld from Blake, he withheld on purpose. It was nobody’s business that C.J. was pregnant until and unless David and she were able to reconcile. And Jared must have felt the same way because he hadn’t mentioned it.

  Blake and Mac decided to take pizza back to the hospital and found a sulking David sitting in bed waiting for them.

  “Where’ve you been?” His surliness was only surpassed by his thundercloud of a face.

  Before Mac could answer Blake waded in.

  “If it was any of your business, we’d tell you. I ran into Mac and we were having coffee until your massage was over. We got to talking and forgot the time.” With that he banged the pizza boxes down on the rolling table beside the bed.

  “Then we went down the block and got pizza. Thought you might enjoy a change from this hospital stuff.”

  David backed off slightly but the frown and pout was still there.

  “All right, David, what’s the matter?” Blake was looking at his partner with some degree of hostility. That was the only way he could keep himself from blurting the information he had.

  “Nothing. I’ve been waiting for Mac since yesterday. And when he gets here he takes off with you.” Turning to Mac he asked. “You bring that van like I asked you to?”

  “Yes, I did. It’s downstairs in the parking lot. You could see it from here if you wanted to look.” Mac shoved David’s chair toward the bed, hoping he’d make some effort to get into it and prove that he really wanted to get out of here and go and find his wife.

  David shoved the chair back at Mac, but the look on his face was so plainly forlorn that neither man had any desire to berate him. In fact, the look made Blake change his mind.

  “Actually, David, we’ve been doing more than just talking. We’ve spent the last hour on a conference call with Jared. But first you need to answer a question for me before I’ll tell you about it.”

  David looked at him, then glanced toward Mac. The redhead was busy watching Blake as though waiting for some signal.

  “All right. What do you want to know?” David sat there, a slightly petulant look on his face, knowing he wouldn’t get an answer from Blake until he’d answered whatever question Blake had. The man could be more stubborn than two mules.

  “Why did you want Mac and that van here?”

  It wasn’t the question David had expected. In fact, he had no idea why Blake needed to know that at all.

  “Why do you want to know?” he asked.

  “David, humor me, here. Why do you want Mac and that van here?” Blake moved to sit on the foot of the bed while he waited for his answer.

  David looked at Blake, then at Mac. He gazed up at the ceiling and then out the window. Blake didn’t think he was trying to think up an answer; he thought David was trying not to let his emotion get in the way of the answer.

  ...you could be crippled, you could be in a wheelchair, you could be missing a limb, it would make no difference to me. It is the inner you I’m in love with.

  “Come on, David, it can’t be that hard.”

  Blake’s soft voice undid him. His eyes were glazed with unshed tears as he turned back to his friend. No one spoke. The wait was interminable.

  “I want to find C.J..” David’s voice was so quiet Blake could barely hear him. And if Mac knew what he’d said it was because he read lips.

  “Thank you, God.” Blake turned to his friend and took his hand in his and squeezed hard.

  “We all want to find her, David. And it may not be as hard as you think.”

  The look of hope that flashed across David’s face made both men cringe. They might know how to find C.J., but there was no guarantee that she would take him back after the pain he caused her.

  “Do you know where she is?” He addressed his question to Blake and missed the look of pain that crossed Mac’s face. This was the part that was going to be tricky.

  “I don’t, but Mac does. When C.J. left, David, she left because she was hurting. She went so far to ground that if it hadn’t been for an accidental sighting, we would never have found her. And let me tell you, my friend, we looked. We’ve all been looking since the day we found out she’d left. That’s how far under she buried herself.”

  “Is it true? What Matt Hawkins told me?” David had to ask; he had to hear it from someone else besides the doctor.

  “What? Is what true?” Blake looked confused.

  “Is it true that it was C.J. that did all the renovations at the ranch so that when I came home I’d be able to get around, do things on my own, even in the chair?”

  Blake couldn’t take his eyes away from David’s. The fear he saw there nearly swamped him. Why hadn’t he believed the doctor?

  “Yes, it’s true. Why wouldn’t you have believed Matt when he told you?”

  “Because I didn’t think she felt that way about me. I really thought it was you and Jared, maybe the other guys, who did it. Even when he told me, I didn’t believe him. That wasn’t the sort of thing I thought she’d do. Not after I threw her out of here the way I did. I know I hurt her something awful..”

  “Why wouldn’t she do that for you? She didn’t stop loving you, just because you came across such a fool.” Blake’s hard words made David feel even guiltier that he had been feeling for so long.

  “I was, wasn’t I? Why, Blake? Why couldn’t I accept what had happened? Matt told me that it was because of him that she hadn’t said anything and still I screamed at her. You were there.”

  “Yes, I was there. And you want to know something David? If you hadn’t been hurting so bad from finding out you were paralyzed, I’d probably have knocked your lights out. That’s how mad I was at you that day. What you did to your wife was unpardonable. And the fact that she came back to the ranch and made it all ready for you was something I had trouble believing, too. Except that I know why she did it. She loved you. Plain and simple.” He looked toward Mac then back to David.

  “You know what really upsets me? That we sat back here and let her carry the weight for all of us. Whatever you needed we gave because you are our friend and we love you. Hell, you’re more like a brother than a friend to me. But when it came to C.J.? None of us was there for her when she really needed us. If we’d been there that day for her as much as we were for you, she wouldn’t have made it back to the ranch. We wouldn’t have let her leave.” He hung his head, his shame washing over him again.

  “We let her down. Badly. We let her go and we stayed here with you. When we were at home we were busy with our families and really didn’t keep track of what was happening at your place. We made sure Mac did your chores and when he started helping C.J. with the renovations we all thought that was admirable of him. We never stopped to think about her and what she needed. And for that I hope she’ll forgive us.”

  Blake stood and started pacing. When he turned to David once more, the anger was gone from his face; it was now a look of resignation.

  “The rest of this story is Mac’s. He’s the one who found her, kept an eye on her and knows where she is. After talking to him and Jared, I’m all for Mac’s plan and I hope you’ll go along with it.” Blake left the room then, unable to stick around and hear again what they’d all done to C.J. through their neglect.

  By the time Mac told David what had happened at the ranch and how he’d found C.J., there were silent tears sliding down David’s cheeks. He didn’t even seem to notice.

  “God, I hurt her, didn’t I, Mac?” He lay back, looking at the ceiling, unable to look Mac in the eye. That’s
how deep his guilt went.

  “Yeah, I’d say we all hurt her to some degree. I guess even I hurt her because I’ve known where she was for the last three months and didn’t let her know I was there for her.”

  “No. You’ve been looking out for her. You haven’t done anything wrong.” David scrubbed the heels of both hands over his eyes, trying to stem the impulse to cry. “I started this and now it is time I finished it. Where is she Mac?” The eyes that turned to Mac had the burning intensity of one who knows what he has to do.

  “That I’m not going to tell you.” He held up his hand to stop David as he thought he might speak. “And don’t ask me to. I’ve got a different plan and we are going to do this my way.”

  Once he’d laid out his plan, David had to admit that it was probably the best way of handling the entire mess he’d made.

  Blake came back just as they were finishing the discussion.

  “Now that everyone knows what the other is doing and why, how about we eat that pizza? I’ll take it out to the nursing station and see if they can find us a microwave to nuke it, or we’ll be eating it cold.

  By the time they had finished the lukewarm pizza, David was feeling much better about Mac’s plan.

  He just hoped it worked.

  That night when visiting hours finished, Mac and Blake made their way back to the hotel in companionable silence. Because there was a second bed in his room, Blake had suggested to Mac that they stay in the one room where they could put the finishing touches on the arrangements for the next day.

  The two men sat drinking coffee and going over the plan in their minds looking for any flaw that might scuttle it.

  “I think that’s the best we’re going to be able to do. If she doesn’t want to come back to him, nothing we say is going to change her mind.” Blake didn’t even want to think about that eventuality.

  “But, Blake, I don’t think she’s going to do that. I know how she was behaving while we did the renovations at the ranch. She did those things for him. The day I saw her sitting on a kitchen chair by the gatepost while she lowered the latches, I realized just how much she did still love him. He hadn’t been able to kill her love with his words here at the hospital and I doubt time has made that much of a difference. If it had, I think she’d have let us know where she was, I think she’d have given one of us the rings or she’d have taken them back to the hospital—maybe thrown them at him—but I don’t think she’d have gone into hiding. I hope I’m right, but I think she’s afraid to come to any of us because she does still love him and she doesn’t want us telling him.”

  “I sure hope you’re right.”

  That night there were four men who didn’t sleep and in a town some distance away, a woman didn’t sleep much better.

  When she opened the door the next morning to the sound of a gentle knock, C.J. was expecting housekeeping. It was the girl’s day to do the weekly cleaning to C.J.’s room.

  Instead, she backed up with a gasp as she saw Mac Blade standing there. She put her hand over her mouth, afraid to say anything. Then fear made her speak.

  “Is David all right, Mac? Has something happened?”

  “Nothing’s happened, C.J., he’s fine.” Mac was prepared to catch her because C.J. looked like her knees might just buckle any moment. But she pulled herself together and looked up at him.

  “How did you find me?”

  Suggesting that they could speak more easily if they were sitting down, Mac led C.J. back into her room and pulled out one of the chairs at the little kitchen table for her. Spying the electric coffee pot on the counter and the nearly full pot of coffee under its dome, he fussed about getting them each a cup and brought it back to the table.

  C.J. tried again.

  “How did you find me, Mac?”

  “Actually, C.J., I’ve known where you were for the last three months.” He told her how he’d spotted her outside the restaurant and followed her back to the motel.

  “My friend Mona gives me weekly updates on how you’re doing, and I always stick around to have a look at you for myself. If you’d ever needed help I was as close as a phone call although you never knew about it.” Thinking that didn’t sound right he tried again.

  “I meant that Mona could call me—not you. You didn’t know I knew…” he stopped as her hand covered his.

  “I think I understand, Mac.” She spoke softly, afraid to give way to the feelings that were swamping her. If Mac was here, there had to be a reason.

  “Why did you come, Mac? Has something happened to David?” The fear in her eyes nearly broke his heart. He couldn’t speak fast enough to give her relief.

  “No. No. He’s fine. Well, he’s sort of fine.” Mac didn’t think he could make it any more confusing for C.J.. If he didn’t smarten up, he’d lose the whole thing for David before he even got to talk to C.J..

  “C.J., just let me tell it, okay?” He waited for her to nod. Once more he reached out and covered her hands.

  “David is being released on Monday, C.J.. He’s going home.” She sat up straight, pulling away from him and covering her mouth with both hands but not before he heard the small cry.

  “C.J., he asked me to come up here to take him home in the van, but I had a job to do before that. He wanted me to find you. I finally had to tell him that I knew where you were and then I had to physically walk out on him. He wanted me to bring him here; but I wouldn’t do it, not until I’d talked to you. He knows I’m here this morning. He and Blake are waiting at the hospital to hear what your answer will be.” He paused, then looked her in the eyes.

  “C.J., he wants you to come back to him and the ranch. He says he still loves you, has since the day he threw you out.” He paused when she sobbed; she hadn’t been crying but that was the only way he could describe the sound. “He told us last night that he wished he’d died after he did that to you.”

  “Who’s ‘us’? She wondered which partner had come to take him home.

  “Blake was here when they told him he could leave. Jared was going to come, too, but with me here and Blake, that left no one back home.” He noticed that it wasn’t hard to call the ranch home, for that’s what it had become.

  C.J. sat and looked at him, wondering if he had told David that she was pregnant, but not wanting to ask. As though he had read her mind, Mac’s next comment put her more at ease.

  “The only one who knows you’re expecting is Jared and he promised to say nothing. We haven’t told David.”

  “Thank you for that.” She was crying silently, tears rolling down her face. “Is he really ready to go home? Or did he just refuse to work for them anymore.” She tried to smile, hoping to make Mac think things were fine with her.

  “No, I think he’s really ready. At least from what Blake tells me. They’re sending him home with a nurse for the first month, someone who can make sure he can do everything he needs to do for himself, but in the kinds of situations he’ll only find at home.” He waited to see if she’d say anything else.

  “He wants to talk to you, C.J..”

  She sat, saying nothing for so long, Mac decided she wasn’t going to answer. But then she stood and walked around the little room, touching the few things that were hers then coming back to sit beside him.

  “Do you know what he wants to say?” She had to ask even though she was sure David would not have told Mac.

  “He didn’t say, but it isn’t hard to guess. He told Blake and I that he was so ashamed about what he did to you. Something about not believing the doctor would make you keep quiet about the crash. But reading between the lines, I think he wants to tell you how much he loves you and try to persuade you to come back to the ranch.” Mac sat watching her. This was make it or break it time.

  “Will you talk to him, C.J.?” Mac waited, literally holding his breath. He didn’t know how he could tell David that she didn’t want to talk to him if that was her decision.

  “Mac, I’ll talk to him, but under certain conditions and I set al
l of them.” He was nodding at her as she spoke.

  “I will pick the restaurant and I want to arrive there at least half an hour before he does so that there is no chance of him seeing me unless I’m sitting down. I do not want him to know that I’m pregnant. I want him to talk to me without the baby being an influence on what he says. Will he do that?” She waited, knowing they were hard terms but needing them nonetheless..

  “He’ll do it, C.J.. He said he’d do whatever it took. So I’m sure he’ll do it.” Mac was nearly dizzy with relief. At least they had got this far.

  “You tell him to meet me at one this afternoon, at the same restaurant where you saw me. I’ll be sitting at a table in the back and there will be a place for him to park his chair. When he comes in, he’d better be prepared to talk to me honestly and tell me everything he wants to say at that time, because he’ll only get one chance.”

  “That’s fine. I’ll tell him all of that. Anything else?”

  “No, Mac.” She was shaking her head, her mind already thinking about what she could wear that wouldn’t give away her secret. She hadn’t bought much in the way of maternity clothes but her regular clothes would definitely not work. She stood as Mac stood and walked to the door.

  “See you, C.J. I’ll have him there at one.”He held out his hand to her as though to shake hands but she took his hand in both of hers and hugged it to her.

  “Thank you, Mac. For everything. It’s nice to know I wasn’t alone all that time.” She let go of his hand and watched him walk out the door. With any luck and if David just said the right things, she’d see him back at the ranch.

  C.J. arrived at the restaurant just before twelve and went to find the woman who was the manager. They had become friendly over the last three months when C.J. had treated herself to her weekly lunch out. When she explained, in as few words as possible, what she required, there were suddenly two waiters moving tables and removing chairs, setting things up exactly the way she asked. For the next hour C.J. worried. She had finally decided to wear a pair of slacks and a plaid, western style shirt over a turtleneck. The shirt was big enough to hide her swollen abdomen and long enough to cover her up under the edge of the table. Added to that was the oversize tablecloth that hung down to her lap adding more camouflage.