The Book of Death

by AnonYMous

  Dante frowned. ‘I’m no genius, but this looks a bit fucking suspect to me. Don’t you think this whole thing is a bit odd? I mean, what if Gaius knows we’re coming? We could be walking into a trap.’

  Vanity smiled. ‘You’re right about one thing.’

  ‘What’s that?’

  ‘You’re no genius.’

  ‘Thanks. You’re hardly Alfred Einstein yourself.’

  ‘Albert.’

  ‘Huh?’

  Vanity shook his head. ‘Look man, you’re just being paranoid. Come on, let’s try downstairs and see if he’s around. We should hurry. Don’t want to miss our chance.’

  Vanity seemed very keen to get down to the main hall. Now Dante was relatively aware of the fact that most people thought he was a moron. Kacy frequently warned him about rushing headlong into trouble. And his gut instincts were telling him this was trouble. Why on earth should he trust Vanity? Kacy had been convinced by his story about wanting to be human again because she’d seen his wedding video. Dante hadn’t seen it. All he’d ever seen was that Vanity liked killing people and drinking their blood. And he could kick a clown’s ass as well as anyone. But Dante hadn’t really seen any signs of remorse from him. He seemed to love being a vampire. Some clarification was required.

  ‘Vanity.’

  ‘Come on man,’ Vanity said, once more waving him along to the corridor at the end of the reception area.

  ‘Are you on the level here?’

  ‘What?’

  ‘Are you setting me up?’

  Vanity looked puzzled. ‘What do you mean?’

  ‘I mean, I smell a rat. I really don’t see you desperately wanting to be human again. What I do see is you leading me into a meeting with Gaius. And let me get this straight, you’re telling me he comes here to have his eye cleaned?’

  ‘Polished.’

  Dante took stock of what was being said for a moment. Kacy had been so excited about this opportunity to get their hands on the Eye that he had allowed himself to get caught up in it all without really thinking it through.

  ‘Surely he can polish his own eye. Jeez, it’s gotta be like wiping the lenses on your glasses, surely. He could polish it with a fucking handkerchief, for fuck’s sake.’

  Vanity frowned. ‘Are you calling me a shit?’

  ‘No. I’m just saying that something’s not right here. This doesn’t add up.’

  Vanity walked aggressively towards him. ‘You’re calling me a shit. You’re accusing me of setting you up! After all I’ve fucking done for you. You muthafucker!’

  Dante responded to the aggression the best way he knew—by responding in kind. He stormed towards Vanity and the pair of them stopped inches apart, staring one another down.

  ‘I am calling you a shit,’ Dante snarled. ‘What the fuck is going on here? Are you my fucking friend or what? Because right now I’ve got this feeling like you’re Rameses Gaius’s bitch and you’re using me to get in his good books.’

  There was an awkward silence as he waited for Vanity to reply. The two of them stared at each other fiercely for a few seconds until quite by surprise, Vanity’s face broke out into a huge beaming smile. He laughed heartily and slapped Dante on the shoulder.

  ‘Haha, good one,’ he said. ‘You almost had me then. I thought you were serious for a second there. Come on. The time for joking around is over. We’ve gotta go pick a fight with a mummy before it’s too late.’

  He slapped Dante on the shoulder again and then bounded back to the corridor at the back of the reception area. Dante couldn’t work out what to make of it. Vanity seemed to think he was kidding when he accused him of double crossing him. But he hadn’t been kidding. He started following on after his laughing buddy, unsure of whether or not he was making a terrible mistake.

  As he reached the corridor he felt his phone vibrate in his pocket. Someone had sent him a text message. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and flicked to the message. It was from Kacy. It read –

  VANITY LIED. GET AWAY FROM HIM. I THINK IT’S A SETUP! CALL ME!

  He read the message twice to make sure he wasn’t misunderstanding it. He’d been right. Vanity was a shit. And a bit of a cunt for that matter. He stopped walking and looked up to see Vanity striding along the corridor up ahead with his back to him. He had a chance to turn and run before Vanity noticed. He slipped his phone back in his pocket and turned back to the museum’s front entrance.

  As he turned he heard the sound of the front doors being slammed shut. His eyes confirmed it. Standing in front of the now closed doors in his shiny silver suit was Rameses Gaius. And his precious blue stone was still lodged firmly in his right eye socket.

  ‘Mr Vittori,’ he said stepping forward. ‘We meet again.’

  ‘Pardon?’ said Dante, pretending not to have heard him.

  Gaius looked irritated. ‘I said, Mr Vittori, we meet again.’

  ‘Sorry, I still can’t hear ya,’ said Dante, his eyes desperately searching for an escape route as Gaius walked towards him.

  ‘I said, we meet again!’ Gaius raised his voice, almost shouting.

  ‘What?’

  Gaius stopped in the middle of the reception area, approximately ten metres away from Dante. ‘Let me put it another way,’ he said.

  The giant mummy raised his right arm. In the palm of his hand was a bright blue glowing light. Dante stared at it, unable to work out what it was. It was unlike anything he’d ever seen. Suddenly Gaius jolted his arm and the blue glow formed into a laser bolt. It flew from his palm straight at Dante. It blasted into his chest. The sheer force of it lifted him off his feet and he flew backwards through the air until his head crashed into a wall behind him with a sickening crack. Everything went black and as he drifted into a state of unconsciousness and slumped to the floor, Dante hoped Kacy wouldn’t come looking for him without the Bourbon Kid.

  Vanity dashed back to the reception area to find Gaius standing over the crumpled, unconscious figure of Dante. The Lord of the Undead looked mighty pleased with himself, which meant that he was most likely pleased with Vanity too.

  ‘Too easy, huh boss?’ Vanity said, grinning.

  Gaius grinned back at him. ‘There’s nothing as simple as defeating the gullible, is there?’

  ‘Uh, yeah. So what’s next? You still need me?’

  Gaius glanced over Vanity’s shoulder. ‘No,’ he said coldly. ‘We’ve no further need for you.’

  Vanity didn’t like Gaius’s tone. He spun around to see what it was that his boss was looking at behind him. Four vampires from the Black Plague were approaching him from behind. He turned back to Gaius.

  ‘I thought we had a deal,’ he said, failing to mask the concern in his voice.

  Gaius raised his right hand. His palm was glowing blue. “I don’t make deals with people who double cross their friends,’ he said.

  ‘Oh shit.’

  Fifty

  Beth could feel Razor’s gun pressed into the base of her spine. In front of her she could see the outline of Jessica. The Vampire Queen was leading the way into the darkened main hall.

  By the time they had reached the top of the staircase Beth’s eyes had gradually become accustomed to the dark. She was able to make out the shapes of several statues and pillars in the hall below. There was no sign of JD, but she knew he must be near. As if reading her thoughts, Jessica spoke aloud.

  ‘He’s down here. I can smell the bourbon on his breath.’ Raising her voice she called out into the darkness. ‘Show yourself! You can’t hide from me in the dark.’

  What followed was the sound of a door opening at the far end of the hall, quite some distance away. Beth made out the sound of some muffled voices and then suddenly all of the lights in the hall came on at once, lighting up everything brightly. Her eyes darted around her surroundings, looking for JD. All she saw at the end of the room was Sanchez the bartender being shoved in the back towards the centre of the room by one of the Panda vampires. It was a female wearing an all bl
ack outfit, with the exception of the red baseball cap on her head. Under her left arm she was carrying a large black hardback book.

  Jessica called out to her. ‘Is that The Book of Death you’ve got there?’

  Panda Girl nodded. ‘Yeah. This guy brought it with him.’

  Jessica reached the bottom of the stairs and stepped onto the marble floor. She hissed at Sanchez. ‘So, you found my book. How good of you, Sanchez.’

  Sanchez shrugged. ‘Well, it was nothing really. Perhaps you could just give me the reward and I’ll be on my way?’

  ‘Why the rush?’ Jessica asked, a mischievous grin breaking out on her face. ‘Why don’t you stay a while? We’re having a party. Your friend the Bourbon Kid is here too. He’s about to show himself to us any second now.’

  Sanchez didn’t look too keen to take her up on the invite. ‘It’s okay. I’ve got places to be,’ he said, turning back towards the door through which he had come. Panda Girl wasn’t letting him get away that easy. She grabbed his arm and yanked him back. Then she shoved him hard, back toward the middle of the hall.

  Jessica walked towards him, looking all around her, no doubt waiting for the reappearance of the Kid. Razor pressed his gun harder into Beth’s back and then gave her a push to indicate that she should follow Jessica.

  Panda Girl shoved Sanchez again, a little more ferociously this time. She nodded at Jessica. ‘He wasn’t planning on giving you the book at all,’ she said. ‘He found out you were a vampire and had a change of heart. When I found him he was cowering in a bathroom and trying to hide the book.’

  ‘That sounds like typical Sanchez all right,’ said Jessica scornfully. ‘We’ll deal with him later. For now I think it may be time to call out our mystery guest.’ She stared all around the hall, looking once more for sign of the Kid, then she called out loud. ‘Very well then. Razor, kill the girl.’

  Beth felt a lump in her throat. Razor’s gun had been pressed against the small of her back but the pressure was relieved as he pulled it away. Although he was behind her, she could see his arm moving out of the corner of her eye. He was about to shoot her in the head. She closed her eyes and waited for the moment of truth. Would JD make his move and reveal himself before Razor pulled the trigger?

  She heard the safety click on the gun as Razor released it, ready to fire.

  ‘WAIT!’ A gravelly voice called out from behind them.

  Beth looked over her shoulder. Razor too, twisted around pointing his gun in the direction of where the voice had come from. Stepping out from within the shadows of one of the many statues in the hall was the Bourbon Kid, his long dark robe identifying him to everyone, the hood pulled up over his head.

  Razor pointed his pistol at him.

  The Kid raised his hands in surrender. ‘Hey, don’t shoot,’ he said calmly. ‘I came here to make a deal.’

  Jessica swiftly appeared at Beth’s side, her lightning dexterity making it seem as though she had appeared out of thin air. This bitch was quick.

  ‘Drop your weapons!’ she hissed at the Kid.

  The Kid ignored her and pointed at Razor. ‘Put your gun down,’ he said.

  Razor had plans of his own. His three best friends had all perished at the hands of the Kid so he wasn’t about to pass up the opportunity for some payback. ‘No fucking way,’ he snarled. Then without waiting for permission from anyone he squeezed the trigger on his gun. The loud bang that followed was deafening. Beth covered her ears and winced.

  JD had ducked out of the way of the bullet before it was even fired. His response to the attack was emphatic. As he rolled to one side he aimed his right arm in Beth’s direction. A silver dart flew out of his sleeve. Before she had a chance to move the dart flashed past her hip. It missed her by less than an inch and embedded itself into Razor’s crotch. He doubled over and slumped to the ground howling in agony clasping at the dart.

  From behind her, Beth heard Sanchez sum up the events in one overstated sentence.

  ‘SHIIIIT! He just shot that guy in the dick!’ the bartender exclaimed.

  Realising that she was suddenly free of Razor’s grasp, Beth turned to flee. She had no idea where she was intending to run to, but anywhere away from Jessica was a start. Unfortunately Jessica was fully expecting such a move. She stepped in behind Beth and grabbed her by the hair, yanking her head back. A moment later Beth felt the Vampire Queen’s razor sharp fingernails pressed against her throat.

  ‘That was a mistake!’ Jessica hissed at the Kid.

  The Kid stood up and spoke calmly. ‘Let her go. This is between you and me. Leave her out of it.’

  ‘Drop that fucking crossbow you’ve got up your sleeve!’ Jessica demanded.

  ‘Fine.’

  The Kid lowered his arms. From the right sleeve of his coat he dropped a miniature silver crossbow to the floor. It clattered against the hard marble and bounced away from him.

  ‘Got any other weapons?’ Jessica asked. ‘Because now’s the time to drop them.’

  The Kid opened his coat. Underneath it he wore a simple black T-shirt and black combat trousers. ‘I have nothing else. Now let her go.’

  ‘Take off your coat and get on your knees,’ said Jessica.

  ‘You’ll let Beth go?’

  ‘Get on your knees.’

  The Kid took off his coat and tossed it onto the floor. But instead of dropping to his knees he made a swift movement with his right arm. He reached back and whipped out a gun that had been strapped across his back. He pointed it at Jessica’s head, its red laser sighter aimed at the centre of her face. Jessica was lightning quick though. As the Kid was about to squeeze the trigger she yanked Beth’s head into the line of fire. For several seconds the Kid continued to re-aim the gun at Jessica. Each time he did she moved a part of Beth into the line of the red sighter.

  Behind her, Beth heard Razor groaning. It distracted the Kid momentarily too. He took his eye off Jessica, pointed his gun at Razor and fired off a shot.

  BANG!

  Although Beth didn’t see what happened, she heard the unpleasant sound of blood splattering against the marble floor. And then the red laser was aimed back at Jessica again and the ritualistic dance began once more. The Kid tried in vain to line up a clean shot at the Vampire Queen who was revelling in the challenge.

  After numerous failed attempts to line up a clear shot, he gave up trying. It was obvious that she was too quick. Firing a shot would be far too risky. He stopped re-aiming the gun and lowered it to his side.

  ‘You’ve got no intention of letting her go, have you?’ he said.

  Jessica smiled. ‘I want you to watch this,’ she said. ‘I’m going to make your darling Beth into a vampire. She’s going to be my new bitch. And you can be her first victim, unless you choose to kill her of course. You know, like you did with your mother?’

  ‘And like I did with Archie Somers. Shoulda heard him scream. What a bitch.’

  Beth felt Jessica’s grip on her throat tighten. The claws on the end of her fingers were on the verge of drawing blood. ‘I’m going to enjoy this,’ she hissed.

  The Kid seemed unfazed. ‘I knew it would come to this. Quit stalling and do it now. What are you waiting for?’

  ‘Very well. As you wish!’

  Jessica opened her mouth wide, revealing a set of huge vampire fangs, thirsty for blood. Beth looked over at JD, her eyes pleading with him to save her. And that was when it finally hit her. This was not JD who had come to her rescue. This was the Bourbon Kid, the man who cared for no one.

  As that thought raced through Beth’s head, Jessica’s fangs ripped through the skin on the lower part of her neck, plunging deep into her flesh.

  Fifty-One

  Flake looked into the eyes of the Bourbon Kid and watched him raise his gun again and aim it at the centre of her face. ‘Close your eyes,’ he growled.

  ‘Why?’

  ‘Because this is gonna sting.’

  She did as instructed and closed her eyes. Maybe he was kidd
ing around?

  BANG!

  Maybe not.

  He’d fired the gun all right, just as she had expected he would. But she was still alive. At least, it felt like she was still alive. Somewhere behind her, near the elevators at the back of the reception area she heard a body slump to the ground. The Kid had killed someone, but she had no idea who. Maybe the next bullet would be for her? She winced, readying herself for what was to follow.

  And she waited.

  Was the Kid deriving some sick pleasure from prolonging the agonising wait? After what felt like an eternity but was most likely about five seconds, she heard another sound. A rattling noise. It was a familiar sound to Flake. She recognised it immediately. The rattling lasted three or four seconds then stopped. It was followed by a hissing sound, coupled with something splashing on to her eyelids and across the bridge of her nose. What sick twisted shit was this guy pulling? Much of the upper half of her face from the tip of her nose, up to just above her eyes felt the impact of the spray. This renowned psychopath, the Bourbon Kid was spraying her face with the can of black spray paint she had left on her desk.

  When the spraying came to an end and she heard him place the can back down on the desk, she squeaked out a question from the corner of her mouth. ‘What are you doing?’ she asked.

  ‘I’m making you look like a vampire,’ came the reply.

  She opened her eyes and blinked a few times.

  ‘Keep your eyes shut,’ said the Kid.

  She snapped them shut again, closing them tightly. The paint had a strong vapour that had stung her eyes when she opened them.

  ‘Is this some kind of sick game?’ she asked.

  ‘You wanted to help your friend Sanchez, right?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Well, if you wanna get into the Casa de Ville, you’re gonna need to look like a vampire. There’s a clan called the Pandas. They paint part of their faces black. You can pass off as one of them.’

  Keeping her eyes closed, Flake grimaced. ‘Surely there’s a better way of doing this than using spray paint?’ she reasoned.