Life of Joy

by Amy Clipston

  Lindsay grimaced. “I should’ve invited her to come to the bus station, but I didn’t think she could’ve come.”

  “It’s okay,” Rebecca said. “I didn’t mean to make you feel bad. They just miss you. I gave them your address and phone number, so don’t be surprised if you hear from them.”

  “Danki,” Lindsay said. “It would be nice to hear from them. How’s Onkel Daniel?”

  “Gut,” Rebecca said.

  “Has he talked to Matthew?” Lindsay asked before she could stop the words from leaving her lips.

  “He didn’t tell me if he did,” Rebecca began. The smile in her voice emanated through the phone. “But you know how reticent your onkel can be. I’m certain Matthew asked about you, and Daniel probably said he’d heard you were fine.”

  Lindsay felt her cheeks heat at the thought of Matthew talking about her with her uncle. She changed the subject to the weather, and they talked about the long warm days and how much the children loved playing outside in the pasture.

  “Are you making supper now?” Rebecca asked.

  “Ya, I threw together a stew.” Lindsay crossed the kitchen and stood by the crockpot, inhaling the aroma. “I’m using a crockpot.”

  “I’ve heard that they’re really gut for stews,” Rebecca said.

  “I don’t know how it will taste, but it smells awfully good.”

  Rebecca chuckled. “I’m certain it will be appeditlich. You’re a good cook.”

  “How about you? What are you making tonight?”

  “I made a chicken potpie,” Rebecca said.

  “Oh.” Lindsay licked her lips. “That’s my favorite.”

  “I know,” Rebecca said.

  They were both silent for a moment, and Lindsay longed to tell Rebecca how homesick she was and how much she wanted to come back home. Instead, she bit her bottom lip to stop the words that she feared would upset her aunt.

  “How are you feeling?” Lindsay asked. “Are you getting enough rest?”

  “Oh, I’m just fine,” Rebecca said. “But I can never get enough sleep.”

  “Maybe someone can come over and help you so that you don’t work too hard,” Lindsay said, moving to the windows and gazing out over the beach below. “Nancy or Katie could come and stay with you so you don’t overdo it. I know you. You won’t slow down even though the doctor tells you to.”

  “I’ll ask for help if I need it,” Rebecca said. “Well, I need to see if the kinner are still asleep. I better go.”

  “It was good hearing your voice,” Lindsay said.

  “Ya, it was gut hearing yours too,” Rebecca said.

  “I’ll call you soon,” Lindsay promised.

  Hanging up the phone, Lindsay sucked in a deep breath and willed herself not to get emotional. Yes, she missed her family back in Lancaster County, but she had to be strong and mature. She wasn’t a kid anymore, and Trisha needed her.

  She set the table and checked the stew before stepping into the den where Trisha was staring at the television.

  “Who was on the phone?” Trisha asked as she turned down the volume on the evening news.

  “Aunt Rebecca,” Lindsay said, sitting on the arm of the sofa. “She wanted to see how everything was going here.”

  “I bet she misses you.”

  Lindsay nodded. “I’m sure she does, but the family will take good care of her.”

  Trisha adjusted herself in the chair, wincing as she moved her leg.

  “Do you need some medicine?” Lindsay asked, moving over to her chair.

  “No, no.” Trisha waved off Lindsay’s outstretched arm. “I’m fine. That stew smells so good. I’m glad you used the crockpot.”

  “Yeah,” Lindsay said, leaning back on the sofa arm. “We’re out of meat now. I really need to go to the grocery store. Do you think Frank could take me tonight after supper if you’re feeling okay?”

  “I’m sure he will. He should be home any moment.” Trisha gestured toward the sofa. “Take a load off and sit with me while we wait for him. I heard you cleaning the upstairs earlier. You work too hard.”

  Lindsay sank into the sofa and stared at the television, wondering how Rebecca’s potpie tasted.

  “You want me to take half of the list?” Frank asked Lindsay while they crossed the parking lot of the Bloom grocery store later that evening. “Grocery shopping isn’t my thing, but I can handle finding the easy stuff.”

  Lindsay examined her list. “How about you get the milk, bread, and eggs, and I’ll meet you at the checkout?”

  He gave a mock salute. “Sounds like a plan, Lindsay-girl.”

  The entrance doors opened with a whoosh, and they each grabbed a shopping cart and took off in opposite directions. Lindsay marched through the aisles on a mission, filling the cart with meat, poultry, spices, vegetables, pasta, and produce. She steered toward the checkout and scanned the knot of customers for Frank.

  Voices swirled around her, and for a brief moment, Lindsay thought she heard her name ring out among the chatter. She scanned the sea of faces, searching for Frank and wondering how long it could possibly take him to find milk, bread, and eggs while she’d nearly filled her cart with a variety of items.

  “Lindsay Bedford?” a feminine voice called. “Lindsay Bedford? Is that you?”

  Lindsay spun and nearly knocked over a young woman. Lindsay studied the girl, trying to place her face. The woman was clad in short denim shorts and a gray tank top with bright pink bathing suit straps tied in a bow at the nape of her neck beneath her platinum blonde ponytail.

  “Lindsay?” the woman asked again. Her smile transformed to a frown. “Don’t tell me you don’t remember me. We survived crazy Mr. Richardson’s English class together.”

  Lindsay gasped. “Vicki?”

  “Yeah!” Vicki opened her arms. “It’s so good to see you.”

  Lindsay stepped into her old friend’s hug and laughed. “You look so different.”

  Vicki snickered. “You like the platinum blonde?” She pointed to her scalp. “I need to get my sister to take care of the roots. It’s been about a month since my last touch up.” Her gaze raked over Lindsay. “You look so different. Isn’t it a bit hot for a denim jumper? Besides, you’re at the beach. You should be in shorts and tank tops.”

  Lindsay glanced down at her dress. “Oh. Right.”

  Vicki pointed to Lindsay’s head. “Why do you have that gorgeous hair up in that tight bun? Your hair was always the envy of the school.” She laughed again. “Remember when I tried to dye my hair your color? I looked like a Muppet! The color was all wrong and the towel ended up redder than my head.”

  Lindsay joined in the laughter as the memories of their fun sleepovers returned to her. “That was funny. My mom never got the stain out of the towel.”

  Vicki’s smile faded. “How are you doing since …?”

  “Fine.” Lindsay folded her arms across her chest. “I’ve been living with my aunt in Pennsylvania and I really love it there.”

  “And Jessica?” Vicki asked, leaning against her cart. “How’s she doing?”

  “She’s great. She’s a sophomore in college and in the middle of an internship in New York City with a big accounting firm.”

  Vicki looked impressed. “Wow. She was always brilliant. I’m not surprised.”

  “How about you?” Lindsay asked.

  “Oh, I’m doing fine,” Vicki said, a grin spreading on her face. “I’m leaving for Oregon in less than a month. I can’t wait!”

  “Wow! Oregon.” Lindsay smiled. “That’s really awesome.”

  “Thanks. It’s always been my dream to go to the Pacific Northwest.” Vicki held up her hand, where a tiny heart-shaped diamond sparkled in the fluorescent lights. “Do you remember Brandon Walsh?”

  Lindsay tried to think back to any of the boys from school but couldn’t remember any of them. She shook her head. “Sorry, but I don’t.”

  “We’ve been dating for, like, forever,” Vicki said with a grin. “Bran
don’s going too. He gave me a promise ring last week. We’re going to get married after we graduate and live out in Oregon together.”

  Lindsay examined the ring. “That’s really pretty, Vicki. You must be so happy.”

  “Oh yeah.” Vicki examined her ring and then grimaced. “My parents aren’t happy. They say that I’m too young to be tied down, and I should concentrate on my studies. I guess they don’t remember what it’s like to be young and in love.” She met Lindsay’s stare. “What about you?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “What are your plans? Do you have a boyfriend?”

  “Well, I work—” Lindsay began.

  “Lindsay!” Frank sidled up to her. “There you are.”

  Lindsay glanced down into his cart full of packs of Coke, frozen pizzas, boxes of microwave popcorn, and bags of chips and pretzels. “I thought you were getting milk, bread, and eggs.”

  “We need to load up on some fun stuff too.” He held out his hand to Vicki. “I’m Frank McCabe.”

  “Vicki Swan.” She shook his hand. “I think we met a few years back when Lindsay was still living here.”

  “That’s right.” Frank smiled. “I believe I remember you. It’s good to see you. I’m glad you two caught up. Trisha and I were just discussing that Lindsay needs to get out and have some fun while she’s staying with us this summer.”

  Vicki’s eyes lit up. “You’re staying here all summer?”

  “Yeah,” Lindsay said. “My aunt Trisha broke her leg, so I’m going to be here for a while to help take care of her.”

  “Oh.” Vicki frowned for a brief moment. “I’m sorry to hear about her accident, but I’m glad you’re going to be in town. I’m having a pool party at my parents’ house tomorrow night. You should come.”

  Lindsay paused, wondering what to say in response. A strange excitement filled her at the thought of seeing her old friends. She then felt a little guilty —wondering how Rebecca would feel if she went to a party. However, going to a party wasn’t breaking any rules, as long as there wasn’t alcohol or inappropriate behavior. She glanced at Frank. “Will Aunt Trisha need me tomorrow night?”

  “Of course not. I’ll be home to take care of her. You should go.” Frank tapped Lindsay on the shoulder. “Find out Vicki’s address and I can drop you off and pick you up.”

  “You don’t have your license?” Vicki looked surprised.

  Lindsay felt her cheeks heat. “No, I don’t.”

  Vicki fished a pen and a small piece of paper from her purse and scribbled out her address. “The party starts at six. We’ll have hot dogs and hamburgers.”

  “Do you need me to bring anything?” Lindsay asked. “Maybe a dessert?”

  “Oh, no,” Vicki said, shaking her head. “We’ll have plenty. Just bring your bathing suit and a towel.”

  “Okay. Sounds good.” Lindsay glanced at the address, and memories of fun times spent at Vicki’s house rained down on her. “Thank you for the invitation.”

  “Well, we better get back,” Frank said. “I don’t want to leave Trisha alone too long.” He smiled at Vicki. “Nice seeing you.”

  “I’m so excited that you’re here,” Vicki said to Lindsay. “I can’t wait to tell Heather that I ran into you. She’ll be so psyched to see you tomorrow too.”

  “Great,” Lindsay said. “Have a good night.” She followed Frank to a short line, where he paid for the groceries.

  During the ride home, Frank prattled on about his condo project in the Outer Banks and about the weather. Lindsay only half listened while she contemplated her conversation with Vicki. It was both fun and a little nerve-racking to see friends from her past. Memories of school and time with her parents floated through her mind like bubbles.

  When they arrived back at the beach house, Frank helped Trisha take a shower while Lindsay put away the groceries. While she filled the pantry, she was still silently analyzing her conversation with Vicki. While Lindsay was drifting without a map between two worlds, the English and the Amish, Vicki was brazenly heading to Oregon with her confident head held high and a promise ring on her finger. Vicki knew exactly what she wanted and whom she wanted to marry.

  Lindsay wondered why she couldn’t be that confident or sure of her future. Was something wrong with her? Wasn’t she smart enough to figure out her own destiny like Jessica and Vicki?

  The questions tumbled through her mind as she stepped into the den and found Frank sitting in his favorite chair and typing on a laptop with the Weather Channel droning quietly in the background.

  Lindsay sank into the sofa across from him. “How’s Trisha?”

  “Fine.” He picked up the remote and muted the sound on the flat-screen television. “She took a shower and then I helped her to bed. She’s watching a movie now.”

  “That’s good,” Lindsay said, crossing her legs. “I put all of the groceries away. We should be set for a while.”

  “Thank you. I’m so grateful for all you’re doing for us.” He closed the top of his laptop. “That’s really great that you ran into an old friend at Bloom.”

  “I didn’t recognize her at first,” Lindsay said. “The last time I saw her was at my parents’ memorial service.”

  “I told Trisha about how you saw Vicki, and she’s happy that you’re going to the party.” He tapped the top of the laptop. “It’ll be good for you to get out of the house for a while tomorrow night and spend some time with old friends. I’m sure you’ve missed them, and they’ve missed you.”

  Lindsay nodded while she thought about the party. What would Lindsay and her old friends possibly have in common? Her friends would leave for college soon and Lindsay would return to Pennsylvania to work in a bakery and help her aunt raise her young children.

  Her eyes flickered to the laptop and she remembered her conversation with Trisha about the GED. She wondered if she should look into the GED program by surfing the internet.

  Frank raised an eyebrow. “Something on your mind?”

  “Your laptop,” she said. “Could I possibly borrow it when you’re not using it?”

  “Sure.” He held it out. “Can I help you search for something?”

  She placed the warm computer on her lap. “I was wondering about how you go about getting your GED.” She hoped her cheeks wouldn’t reveal how much the statement embarrassed her.

  “Oh,” Frank said. “I had a guy on my crew get his GED last year. He went through a program at the Adult Learning Center in Virginia Beach.”

  Lindsay bit her bottom lip. “Was it difficult?”

  He shrugged. “I don’t think it was too bad. He studied and took a test. Did you want me to help you find the website for the Adult Learning Center?”

  “Maybe later.” She gave the computer back to him. “Thanks.”

  “You’re welcome.” He flipped open the laptop and began clicking away.

  She watched him, wondering about his employee who got his GED. “How old was he?”

  Frank looked up. “What’s that?”

  “Your employee,” she said. “How old was he when he got his GED?”

  He raked his hand through his thinning brown hair. “I guess he was about twenty-two. Why do you ask?”

  “I was just wondering.” She cleared her throat and glanced at the television, wishing she had the confidence to ask the questions that were heavy on her mind and heart.

  “Lindsay?” he asked gently. “Is there something you want to talk about?”

  She took a deep breath, gathering up her confidence. “Jessica says I should get my GED while I’m here. Do you think it’s a good idea?”

  “Sure.” He shrugged. “It’s a great idea.”

  “What did it do for your employee?” She paused. “What I mean is —did it really make a difference for him to have his GED?”

  “Yes, it did.” He nodded with emphasis. “Although it’s not a college degree, it showed that he had skills, and it makes him more employable.”

  Lindsay shook her
head. “I just don’t know if I want to do it. I’m sort of scared.”

  “I understand that. You’ve been out of school for four years now, but I definitely think that you’re smart and motivated enough to go after it. You should look into it, and if you decide you want to pursue it, then I’ll help you find the information you need.”

  “Thank you, Uncle Frank.” Lindsay glanced toward the door leading to the outside stairs. “I think I’m going to go for a walk on the beach. Would that be okay?”

  He grinned. “Of course it would. Go right ahead.”

  Lindsay trotted back to her room and slipped off her sandals. She grabbed a notepad and pen from her dresser and then ran out the door and down the stairs toward the beach.

  When her feet sank into the sand, she smiled and blew out a sigh. The sand felt so warm and natural as it squeezed between her toes while she walked to the waves, which crashed and retreated with a gentle cadence that took her back to time with her family. She stepped into the edge of the cool water and closed her eyes while remembering times she and her sister played in the water while her parents and the McCabes sat on the deck drinking lemonade, talking, and watching them swim.

  Turning back toward the deck, she imagined her parents still sitting there, her father leaning back in a chair and laughing at Frank’s jokes while her mother sat at the table watching Trisha with interest while they discussed the latest news about their friends.

  Lindsay walked slowly up the beach, enjoying the feel of the sand in her toes as she approached the deck. She climbed the steps to the second story and sat at the table under the lights. Opening her notebook, she began to write:

  Dear Katie,

  Wie geht’s! How’s your family? I’m doing well here in Virginia Beach. Aunt Trisha is doing pretty well. She has some pain, but it seems to ease more every day.

  How are the rest of the Kauffmans? Is the bakery staying busy? How is Aenti Rebecca doing?

  The beach is so pretty. I’m sitting outside on the deck listening to the waves while I write this. I wish you were here with me to see and hear the sights.

  This evening I went to the store with Uncle Frank, and we ran into one of my friends from school. She invited me over tomorrow night, so I’m going to go see her and some more old friends. It should be fun.