SIDECHICK: CATCHING FEELINGS

by K NICOLE

  We had ended up at CRUST, a casual Italian spot that specializes in pizzas with gourmet toppings. It definitely hit the spot and now my ass had the ‘itis. I couldn’t hold Zeus and Perri up any longer and impose on their time.

  I sat in the back seat singing to an old Tevin Campbell song that came on as we traveled back to the hotel. Smiling, I was surprised to see Zeus even knew the song. His ass was a big ole soft teddy bear. The way he was upfront singing to Perri, made me somewhat sad because that was the old me and Roman. Roman was far from romantic now.

  “Can we taaaalk for a minute. Girl I want to know your name,” he sang, cupping Perri’s chin while watching the road.

  “Okay then brother-in-law,” I snickered, causing them both to join in.

  “I can do a lil’ somethin’,” he tossed over his shoulders.

  We sang and rapped to all the songs that came on until we reached the hotel. I was glad to see Perri let loose around me instead of being uptight and tense like she had been. She was alright in my book. I couldn’t understand why Roman figured she wasn’t good for Zeus. I thought she was perfect for him. He seemed so happy with Perri.

  Exiting the car, we all ambled to the entrance, Zeus and Perri hand in hand. Pushing my hair out of my face, I braced myself for the argument that I knew me and Roman were surely about to have.

  “Thanks y’all,” I said, once we stepped on the elevator. “You didn’t have to but thanks for letting me chill with y’all.”

  “Now you know you don’t have to thank us for that,” Zeus replied with a frown. “We’re gon walk you to your room though to make sure you’re straight. You’ve been ignoring Roman all night and then blocked his ass. Ain’t no telling where his head is right now.”

  “Yeah, you’re right.”

  Perri was suddenly quiet and not talking as much as she was earlier. I chopped it to her being tired because I knew I was too. The pads of my feet were hurting and I was ready to take a hot shower and relax. We stepped out of the elevator and my room was a few steps from it. They stood with me as I removed the keycard from my purse and touched it against the keypad, unlocking the door.

  “Where the hell have you been?” Roman rushed me, questioning.

  It was dark in the room except from the light coming from the TV. He wasn’t rough with me, nor did he put his hands on me. He was all in my space and I could feel the rage radiating off of his body. I was pissed too. Roman wasn’t about to stand here and make this all about me when I had no fucking idea where his ass was all morning.

  “Where the fuck were you this morning?” I fussed, forgetting Zeus and Perri were standing behind me until Roman’s eyes left mine to glance behind me.

  “Y’all can leave,” Roman barked. I closed my eyes and shook my head. Zeus didn’t do well with disrespect from nobody.

  “Nigga, you’re welcome she was with us and not wondering around by herself like she was earlier. It’s hot as fuck and she pregnant. She could have had a heat stroke and yo’ ass would have never known,” Zeus growled.

  “Man, get the fuck out of here with that shit. My wife knows how to take care of herself,” Roman spat, seething.

  Zeus chuckled and nodded his head as he bit down on his bottom lip.

  “That’s the problem. Diah is always taking care of you and the kids. When the fuck is someone gon’ take care of her?” Zeus asked, taking a step towards Zeus, but Perri grabbed his shirt to stop him from taking anymore.

  Roman laughed and pointed at Zeus...or was he pointing at Perri. I couldn’t tell, but his next words had my knees weak.

  “Oh, just like you’re taking care of my sidech-”

  My eyes darted to Perri whose eyes were ballooned. I then slowly pivoted to face Roman who looked like he was now choking on his words. It all made sense now why he hated Perri so much. He had fucked her and now Zeus was.

  Warm tears formed but I quickly wiped them muthafuckas away. I was the joke. Everybody in this room knew about Roman and Perri but me. Everything in me wanted to lunge at Perri and bust her head to the white meat, but I had to think about this baby growing inside of me.

  “Really Zeus. That is foul for you to even bring her around me. You brought her to my son’s party. Into my life! You brought this hoe into my house!” I screamed a t my brother-in-law.

  “I brought her as my girl,” Zeus retorted, causing me to snort and start packing my shit up. I was getting my own room and catching a fucking flight back home. Fuck all three of them.

  PERRI

  As soon as we made it back to our room, I rushed to the bathroom and fell down to my knees in front of the toilet. Everything I had just eaten came up. Tears made it impossible for me to see as they came down so fast and clouded my sight.

  “You aight?” Zeus asked, concerned.

  “Am I alright?” I queried, after wiping my mouth with the back of my hand. “This shit was what I wanted to avoid. I never wanted to hurt Diah like that, Zeus.”

  I flushed and stood up. Zeus attempted to grab me but I brushed him off and trekked towards the sink to wash my hands. Glancing in the mirror, I looked horrible. Mascara ran down my now pale face.My stomach was still doing somersaults.

  “Man, I didn’t want her to find out like that either. I hurt her too, but know this…” Zeus walked behind me and looked at my reflection in the mirror. I felt ashamed of how I looked right now. “... I don’t regret coming after you and you being my woman. I’d do it all over again.”

  That softened my heart just a little, but I still didn’t feel good knowing Diah was somewhere hurt. I had actually had fun with her and let that wall come down that I had had up for a while. I had forgotten all about the fucked up shit, now that shit was hitting me hard. I was still a woman and would kill a bitch and Zeus if it was done to me.

  “Come on, let’s shower,” he coaxed, stroking my cheek with his knuckles.

  “I’m not in the mood for sex so don’t try it,” I muttered, sauntering away from him.

  “I know. I just want you to relax and calm down. I wouldn’t have tried fucking you knowing how you’re feelin’ right now ma. Give me some credit.”

  Ignoring Zeus, I grabbed my night clothes and placed them on the bed. I just wanted to shower and sleep because I just hoped this was a nightmare that I needed to wake up from.

  __________

  Sunday morning, I woke up from my sleep to run to the bathroom and vomit again. Even in my sleep, the shit that happened last night haunted me. I wanted to call Wes and vent but he would just tell me the real - I fucked up and would make me feel worse than I already was. We weren’t leaving until tomorrow night but I was going to talk Zeus into leaving today. It was either that or I was just going to stay cooped up in the room all day. I wasn’t ready to face the world.

  I flushed the toilet and turned to walk towards the sink to brush my teeth but damn near jumped out of my skin when I noticed that I wasn’t alone. Zeus was propped up against the door eyeing the fuck out of me.

  “What?” I mumbled. I felt so weak trekking to the sink. My head was pounding and it felt like my heart was beating triple time.

  “You aight? You’ve been throwing up since last night,” he responded.

  I rolled my eyes and started brushing my teeth. I looked a whole mess; still pale.

  “Yeah, I’m fine. Still feeling bad about last night.”

  “And that’s causing you to throw up or are you pregnant?”

  That alone made me freeze. I couldn’t be. I needed to check my period app, I said in my mind.

  “I doubt it,” was what I told Zeus and he laughed inwardly. “What;s funny?”

  “We’ve been slipping up. You need to take a test to be sure. You’re pale as hell and I highly doubt that has anything to do with last night. Lemme find out you’re carrying lil’ Zeus.” I glanced over at him through slits because right now was not the time to be joking. I wasn’t in the mood and nothing about being pregnant...if I were...was funny to me at the moment.

  �
�Zeus, I know I’m not.” I rinsed my mouth with mouthwash and then began to fix my hair that was all over my head.

  “Take a test,” he pressed on. “Only way you’ll know fa sho. I need to know.”

  Sighing, I slapped my palms on my thighs. “If that’ll make you happy,” I said with so much attitude.

  In reality, I wasn’t even upset with Zeus. He was just around when I was feeling like shit, emotionally and physically. I tried walking past him and he grabbed me, bringing me close to him. I avoided his eyes, but he tipped my chin up to face him.

  “Chill, aight? I ain’t did shit to you ma. The situation last night was fucked up but it’s out there and off your back. Whether you and Diah be cool after this, that’s y’all, but as long as you’re fucking with me, you’re family.” Zeus wet his lips as he intensely looked down at me. “Aight?”

  I nodded and out of nowhere I started crying. Zeus reached around me and pulled me into a hug and held me. I was an emotional wreck. What if I was pregnant?

  ___________

  Zeus let Roman know that we were catching a flight back home today and he could take the jet back. We assumed Diah had already caught a flight home. Zeus had attempted to reach out to her, but she never responded.

  As soon as the flight took off, I had to run to the bathroom to throw up again. When Zeus had given me some space, I took a peek at my app and noticed I was a week late. A week! This was odd because I was always on time. The fact that I hadn’t noticed sent me.

  We touched down in Dallas in the evening and once we hopped in Zeus’s car, he took us straight to Walgreens to scoop up a test… or three. I was nervous. The only reason my period had to be late was because I was indeed pregnant. That was the only explanation I had. Zeus was right. We had been fucking wrecklessly.

  Instead of taking me to my place he took me to his home. I wasn’t in the mood to argue. I just wanted to shower and climb in his comfortable ass bed and sleep. As soon as we stepped over the threshold, Zeus was showing the tests in my hands. Snatching them from him, I headed to the bathroom with him on my heels.

  “Damn, can I get some privacy?” I muttered knowing what the damn answer would be.

  “Nah. This involves me too. Piss on all three. Here let me help you open them.”

  Zeus took two of the three out of my hands and tore them open while I opened the one I had. Pulling my cotton PINK shorts and panties down, I sat on the toilet and immediately began to urinate. I stuck the test in the flow and once I was done, I lightly shook them so they wouldn’t drip and placed them on the counter near me.

  I wiped my pussy as Zeus hovered over the tests. Crazy ass. I stood to pull my clothes back up.

  “I’m gon’ be a damn daddy,” was all I heard and then I passed out.

  ZEUS

  It scared me the fuck out of me when Perri passed out in the bathroom. I caught her before her head hit the floor. I immediately scooped her up and ran with her to the car and drove her to Dallas Hospital. She was awake now from all the probing the nurses and doctors were doing. They confirmed she was pregnant and dehydrated, so they had her hooked to an IV running fluids through her. I was glad because she did a lot of drinking at the club and wasn’t aware of her pregnancy.

  Perri’s face was streaked with dry tears because she was scared and I repeated over and over that I was here for her and never leaving her side. Ever. I was gon’ someone’s daddy man. That shit was unbelievable. I was happy though. Excited.

  “How you feelin’?” I leaned over asking, kissing Perri on the forehead. She sighed, but nodded. Before I could say anything else to her, there was a knock on the door. The older white nurse that had been attending to her tonight entered.

  “We are releasing you. Just make sure you stay well hydrated, okay?” she said, sitting down beside Perri.

  “Okay,” Perri replied.

  The nurse removed the IV and had Perri sign her discharge papers. After that she dressed and we were on our way back to my crib. It was a silent ride home. My mind was filled with so many thoughts and Perri… there was no telling. She was acting so reserved, I felt like if I’d ask her what was wrong or what she was thinking, she would flip out. I just wanted to be there for her, if she allowed me to. I was going to be there for my child regardless, even while he was baking.

  At the house Perri showered again because she hated being in a hospital. Said she didn’t feel clean. I sat in the living room, rolled up and smoked; giving her some space.Trying not to hover over her and make her feel as if she was suffocating was hard. I wanted to know how Perri was feeling and what she needed from me. It was all foreign to me because I never had given my heart to a woman. No woman had ever had this type of effect on me. Not until I met Perri and got to know her. I was in love with the girl.

  Good and high, I heard the bathroom door open. I needed to wash my nuts and ass too so I stood to head to do just that. Through low lids, I watched Perri lotion her body down and my dick bricked up. The last time I felt inside of her was Saturday morning. When that shit with Roman and Diah happened, Perri didn’t want me to even touch her. Tonight I wanted to make love to her body but because she had just left the hospital, she wouldn’t be up to it.

  “You need me to grab you some water before I step in the shower?” I asked her, going through my drawer. I heard her giggle and I turned my head to see what the hell was funny.

  “I’m more than capable of getting my own water, Zeus. I’m not handicap,” she said, with a noticeable smile gracing her face. At least she’s smiling. Shit.

  “Aight,’ I spoke. “Once I get comfortable in the bed and I’m rubbing my damn feet together, don’t ask me to get my black ass up.”

  Perri tossed her head back and laughed then shooed me away. Winking at her, I disappeared into the bathroom to beat my meat under the waterfall from the showerhead because I didn’t know when I was goin’ to get some pussy from Perry again.

  __________

  The next morning, again, I woke up to Perri vomiting and I felt bad for bae. It was because of me she was going through this. Thing is, she never complained. Maybe she didn’t have any issues being pregnant by me. Shit, maybe she was happy. It never crossed my mind that Perri was wit’ a nigga becasue I had bread like Zeus. I didn’t think she’d use me. I really liked her muthafuckin’ ass and if I wanted to drop stacks on her, I’d do that with no hesitation. On her and the kid. A smile crept on my face. I couldn’t wait to tell my T Lady. She’d been wanting me to have some kids for the longest, but with the right woman.

  Honestly, I don’t think there is a right woman or right man for people to have kids with. Someone could wake up the next day and decide they no longer wanted to be a parent and get the fuck up out of dodge. Did I plan on doing that shit? Hell nah. I doubted Perri would too. That woman there was perfect. She may have flaws, but in my eyes she was definitely perfect.

  After I had busted a nut and sent my kids swimming down the drain, I showered and hopped out. I could hear music playing and the smell of bacon in the air. After Perri throws up in the morning, she is literally great after that. She goes about her business as if she wasn’t just leaning over the toilet, emptying her stomach.

  I brushed my teeth and then continued to dry my body off. Going back to the room, I could see a call coming through on my phone. I stretched my neck to see that it was my mama. Frowning, I hoped like hell Diah didn’t go back running her mouth off to my mama about this shit. Then I would have to hear my mama talking down on Perri and I wasn’t gonna go for that shit. I wasn’t gon allow anyone to get out of pocket when it came to her. I ignored my mama until she was blowing my phone up again. Once I pulled up my briefs, I snatched my phone up and answered it.

  “Get to your brother’s house now! Diah is throwing his clothes out the window! Nosey ass Mr. Larry… their neighbor just called me!” my mama hollered into the phone, sounding devastated.

  My forehead creased. “First of all why the hell does Mr. Larry have your damn number ma!”
>
  “First of all, that ain’t none of your damn business just do what I said!”

  I smacked my lips. “Man, they are grown. I’m not going over there. Let them handle that shit.”

  “Listen, if she puts him out, he coming over here and I don’t want nobody staying with me. I love my nurse but I can’t wait until she leaves!”

  I chuckled. My mama was crazy, but I still wanted to know why Mr. Larry, who had a whole wife at home, has my mama’s number. Shit wasn’t adding up in my head and he was gon have to see me.

  “You are so stubborn! You think I ain’t notice you and Roman haven’t been coming to see me together like y’all use to. Something is wrong and I want to know what the hell it is,” my mama said.

  I sighed because it was better coming from me than anyone else. After eating breakfast, I was gon have to drag my girl back to my mama’s house so we could tell her together, how we really met and about the baby.

  Perri was probably tired of my shit. Being in my world after being with Roman was stressing her out, but now that the shit was about to be out, I was sure we were going to be judged, but I didn’t give a fuck about none of that shit. I don’t live my life for nobody but me and I was going to show her that she made the right move being wit’ a nigga like me.

  DIAH

  “Fuck you and your nasty ass dick! How dare you step out on me and then knowwwing your brother was bringing your side chick around me and allow that shit. How dare you let me even speak one word to her. Had me being all nice and sweet to her, knowing you had fucked her!” I screamed at Roman, while throwing anything that I saw that was his, off of our balcony.

  I was hurting.

  Pissed.

  Embarrassed.

  I couldn’t believe my gut feeling was right. This nigga had been cheating on me and lying to my damn face. He’d been cheating and lying right next to me every night. I felt sick. Stopping, I hurried to the bathroom to vomit. Nothing came out besides acid because I hadn’t been eating. I know that was selfish because I wasn’t just eating for myself, but I couldn’t bring myself to eat. My parents had the kids. I wouldn’t dare have them here to witness me and their father arguing. Me throwing all of his shit out the window. I knew the neighbors were watching. Had to be because someone called his mama because she was calling my phone back to back.