SIDECHICK: CATCHING FEELINGS

by K NICOLE

  —————

  The house was quiet. The kids were in bed after their baths and I had just finished mine. Now I was in bed and of course that’s when you start thinking the most. When your brain goes into overdrive.

  I thought I would go into a deep depression after the loss of our baby. A baby boy. It was confirmed after they had me push his little body out. At the hospital, I couldn’t stop the tears from falling because that devastated me. Now, no tears fell because he would just be another child caught in this divorce. I didn’t even want to bury him, but because he was still my child, I was going to do right by him. There wasn’t going to be a funeral. I bought his casket and was burying him right next to my grandparents on my mother’s side, so they could take care of him for me. Physically I was ok, but mentally I was drained.

  I did not have the slightest idea how I was going to tell the kids that daddy would not be living with us anymore. They’ve asked where he was and all I could tell them was daddy is out of town. That lie was going to get old eventually. I didn’t know where Roman was staying. When I had dropped the kids off at his mama’s house, he wasn’t there and she said he hadn’t stayed the night. I couldn’t have my kids just anywhere. Yeah, he did pay on this house, but Roman had long money. He could buy six more houses if he wanted to, but high key… this house had too many memories. I no longer wanted to live here. Tonight, when I put the kids to bed, I would do some house hunting online to see what the market has to offer. Exhaling, I knew that I would be okay. Change happens.

  ZEUS

  Three days.

  That’s how long I hadn’t laid eyes on Perri or talked to her. My head was really fucked up. I didn’t know what to believe. She was either here with me because she was really feeling us, or she was just using me to be her next meal ticket. Her sponsor. I wasn’t either.

  Perri was right. She didn’t ask me for my black card, but when I did offer it up, she never declined. I knew I should be checking on her because she was carrying my baby, but I was so fucked up in the head right now, the wrong shit that flew out her mouth would have me hoppin’ in my whip and hemming her little ass up.

  My mama and mine relationship was strained because I wasn’t putting up with the way she talked about Perri. Diah was pissed at me for bringing Roman’s ex mistress around her, and me and Roman just weren't seeing eye to eye behind the choice I happily made.

  I told Roman he was gon’ fuck up his family and he did just that. He let that shit slip from his own mouth. Told on his own damn self. Stupid ass. Now Diah done kicked his stupid ass out the house and the kids have to watch their parents live apart. That’s some shit I didn’t want. That’s that shit that had me picking up the phone to call Perri. the phone rang like three times, and when I hovered my thumb over the end button, she picked up.

  “Hello?” she answered, with a hint of attitude. I chuckled to myself, imagining her face screwed up like I cared.

  “‘Sup. How you feelin’?”

  I heard Perri smack her lips and then exhale. “I’m aight. Why? You care all of a sudden?”

  “Are you carrying my kid or nah? Yeah, I care about you and the baby. Look, hearing that pu-, that fool say that shit out of his mouth, I didn’t know what to think,” I expressed. I placed the phone on speaker so I could roll up and chop it up with Perri at the same time.

  “But if you knew me, then you knew he was just talking. Just because your brother tricked out on me, didn’t mean I wanted you to. At first, yeah I wanted to keep the same lifestyle, but that is not why I’m with you,” she spat angrily.

  “Aight shawty, you don’t even have to be so angry,” I told her.

  “Boy fuck you,” she said, hanging up. I dropped the blunt as I looked at my fucking phone.

  “This girl is out of her fuckin’ mind,” I muttered, grabbing the blunt, my keys and my phone. I left the house ready to give this girl some act right.

  I stopped at the gas station to pick up some chips and a few other snacks for me and Perri, plus fill up my tank. She just needed me to drop some of this dick in her. It’s been a few days. Females always seem to magically get some damn sense after getting dick. It was the recipe to all their damn madness.

  “Ouuu you fine as fuck daddy,” I heard and picked my head up to see who the voice was coming from.

  A chicken head. Should have known.

  Ignoring her ass, I continued to pump my gas and check out the scene. I always keep my guard up at all times as well stay with some heat. Can’t no nigga rob me without a gun fight.

  “Zeus?”

  Now that voice was familiar. It made chills run down my damn spine because I hadn’t heard that voice in years. The voice that belonged to the woman that broke my heart years ago and I hadn’t been the same since. Until now. With Perri.

  My head slowly turned to the left and there she was in the flesh. Demitra Livingston. Damn.

  “That is you,” she said, coming closer.

  I swallowed. This heartbreaker was still fine as fuck. Slim thick, caramel skin that was still flawless. Her hair was shorter than it was back then, but it framed her round head perfectly. It was in a blonde Jada cut. She was smiling at me like everything was still sweet. It wasn’t. Her dimples on each side of her cheeks were deep, her light brown cat eyes were squinting because she was smiling so hard. The full, juicy lips God gave her were glossy and imagined them where they use to be…

  “How have you been?” she asked, interrupting my thoughts, and I realized I hadn’t said shit to her. Demetiri was in this tight, yellow ass dress that had her B cups sitting up and that ass poking. The smirk she wore… she knew she still had the effect of me.

  “I’m straight,” I responded, dryly while hanging up the gas pump.

  “You still look good as fuck.”

  My eyes darted to her hand. No ring. The last time I checked she was married to some nigga on the oil rig. I snorted lightly. Yeah, I wasn’t falling for that shit.

  “‘Preciate it.” I reached in the window of my car and grabbed some Wet Wipes that I kept on me. I cleaned my hands off and tossed the wipe in the trash can. “Gotta go. My girl has been actin’ up and I needa go handle that.” I winked at Demitra before hopping in my shit. Her eyes kind of sparkled. She knew what type of monster I was holding. Any bitch I fucked with gon’ always remember me. No cap.

  “Maybe I’ll see you around,” Demitra stated, hopefully.

  I shook my head. “Nah, I’m good,” I replied, before speeding off, leaving her ass in the rearview mirror watching me like a hawk. If Demitra ever tried to come between me and Perri, I’d gladly murk her and that's on my child.

  PERRI

  Zeus was sweating my damn newly installed lace front out. I tried my best to put my foot down but when he came over looking all zaaaadyish in a crisp white tee and dark grey sweats that the print was clearly visible, I couldn’t even be mad anymore. Three days with no dick and now that I’m pregnant and don’t have any periods, I was feenin’!

  “Shiiiiit,” I moaned loudly as I creamed on his chocolate pole. “You fucking me too hard!”

  Zeus pulled my hair back as he kept drilling me doggy style and whispered in my ear, “You gon’ act right? You gon’ stop wit’ the childish shit you be on when things don’t go your way? You gon’ stop handling a nigga? Huh?”

  “Yes. Fuck! Whatever the fuck you waaaaannnnt!” I screamed, cuming again. Zeus was the definition of demon time. His fat ass...long ass...veiny ass dick filled me the fuck up and all of it wasn’t even inside but the tip was reaching!

  Slap!

  This nigga done slapped my ass so hard it tingled, but it was all mixed in with this pleasure I was receiving, I couldn’t complain.

  “I’m cuming agaiiiin,” I wailed. My eyes rolled to the back of my head as my face contorted. It was dark in my room and I was thankful for that. The faces I was making were probably horrifying!

  Zeus bit down on my shoulder. “I’m right behind you pooh.”

  He w
himpered and his body twitched a little as he filled me up.

  “Gah damn,” mumbled Zeus, easing out of me and walking out of the room and into the bathroom. I followed suit because he filled me up and it was already seeping out of me.

  Zeus pissed and then ran the shower while I sat on the toilet and used it. Globs of his nut left me as I pissed. Globs! That’s how much his ass was backed up from being away from me for three days. Bet he learned his damn lesson. Nigga almost had blue balls.

  “You sore? You feel aight? I know I went a little hard, but I don’t want you to lose my kid,” Zeus said, and then he walked into the shower. I wiped and flushed, then stepped inside with him.

  “I’m fine,” I assured him. “I just don’t want to fight and argue anymore.”

  “You got that. I don’t want to fight and argue with you either ma.”

  “Good,” I smiled. Zeus leaned down and pecked my lips, then he washed my body from head to toe. I was going to sleep good!

  __________

  “Hey mama,” I said when she opened up her screen door. It’s been a minute since I stopped by. I had to check on her from time to time because my mama still played a dangerous game fucking with these different niggas for money. It’s been plenty of niggas putting their hands on her for trying to rob them blind. I’m always afraid one will hurt her real bad or take her from me. She was too old to be still doing this shit anyway, and today I was informing her that she was going to be a grandma.

  “Look what the wind blew in,” she laughed, blowing smoke in the air from her Newport. I waved the smoke out of my face and tried not to inhale. I was doing everything in my power to have a healthy child. “Mmm, your hips are spreading. How many niggas you got?”

  I rolled my eyes. Here goes that bullshit.

  “One and he is my man. As in a relationship. As in baby daddy,” I told her, sliding in the last part. Her eyes ran from my face to my stomach.

  “Tell me it ain’t so.”

  I flipped my hair over my shoulder and then crossed my arms across my chest. “It is so. Is that a problem? Is it a problem that someone loves me and we’re having a kid together?” I frowned.

  My mama sat her narrow ass in her recliner and put the cigarette out. She was still beautiful after all the years. We looked just alike except her hair was jet black and she still wore her hair in finger waves. That was her go to style.

  “He got money?” she queried, crossing her legs .

  “Why does everything have to be about money?” I squealed, now believing that this was a bad idea. “What’s wrong with actually having real love? You ain’t never been loved correctly so you wouldn’t even know what it is...is that it?”

  I could tell I hit below the belt because I saw her eyes gloss over for a moment, but she turned away from me. When she got herself together, she pointed a finger at me.

  “Watch yourself little girl.”

  I jumped up and she did too. I wish my mama would swing on me pregnant. I would dog walk her ass, I’m sorry to say. Yeah, she was my mama but putting her hands on me I would see her ass as someone different. Respect me and I’ll respect you. I grabbed the pink Louis Vuitton Sac Plat PM purse I had bought in with me and darted for the door. She probably wouldn’t see or hear from me in a while. I wanted her to be in the delivery room with me but I was okay with it just being me and my man.

  Never do I just pop up at Wes’ house, but today I needed my friend and I wanted to surprise his ass because I never just chill at his crib. He is always at mine.

  Imagine me pulling up to his condo and seeing Paul’s pink ass Hummer outside of it. Now Wes told me that Paul was hitting him up and shit trying to make amends, but he didn’t put me on to the fact that he was letting his ass know where he lived and inviting him over. It wasn’t my business, but then again it was because if you hurt my friends and their fucking feelings, I was on your ass! Plus, I didn’t give a fuck about Paul. What I needed to do was drag Wes to a gay bar and let him find his next boo. Yeah, that is exactly what I was going to do!

  Turning off my car, I exited and locked up before stomping to the front door in my red and white checkered Vans. My stomach was poking just yet so I had the luxury to still wear crop tops. I had on a red crop top paired with white distressed shorts I had bought from a cute boutique out in Dallas. My orange hair was up in a messy bun because it was just too hot for it to be on my neck. Balling my fist, I beat the hell out of Wes’s front door like I was the law.

  The blinds in his living room moved from one of them peeking out of it instead being smart and using the peep hole. I kept banging on it until it finally opened and it was just slightly opened with the chain still on it. Wes appeared and was out of breath. My stomach was queasy.

  “Really Wes?” I frowned.

  “I love him bitch,” was what he said to my back because I was leaving.

  ROMAN

  My eyes were hoping that the words on these documents would change, but the longer I stared at them, I knew my eyes weren’t playing tricks on me.

  Divorce papers.

  This shit was fucking real. Diah was really leaving a nigga. My heart was beating super fast and my hands were clammy, causing them to damp the papers. I tossed them and they went flying. I wanted to punch a hole in the wall, but I didn't want to pay the hotel for damages either. My whole life was crumbling before my eyes and it wasn’t nobody but my fault.

  Divorce.

  I despised that word. If I could only turn back time and would have left that bitch ass girl alone, I would still be at the house with my wife and kids. My wife would have probably still been pregnant with my son. I could never forgive myself for this shit. I can’t say life goes on, because without my wife, it honestly doesn’t. Diah was the best thing I had ever had in my life and I fucked all that shit up.

  Maybe I could talk her out of the divorce.

  Maybe she’ll listen to me beg like Keith Sweat and take me back because she felt bad for a nigga. I knew it I didn’t try to get her back even if she refused, I’ll never know.

  Slipping my feet in my nude Balenciaga Triple S Air Nylon sneakers that Diah swore was ugly as fuck, I grabbed my keys and shit and left the room.

  Stepping onto the elevator, I was busy on my phone with my head down, I wasn’t watching where I was going and ended up bumping into a woman and knocking her down.

  “Damn!” she shrieked. “Watch where you’re going!”

  “My bad lil…” I started, but was stopped by her beauty but threw me off at the same time because she looked like an older version of Perri. Reaching my hand out, I waited for her to grab it so I could help her up. I watched her eyes roam my body and then landed on my feet. A smirk krept on her face and her small hand slipped into mine.

  “Patrice,” she smiled, “and you are?”

  “Roman,” I replied, squinting at her. I could not unsee how much she resembled Perri and figured they just had to be kin. “Are you related to a woman named Perri?” Shit, I just had to know because I had to get away from her ass if so. I wasn’t trying to be around shit that was related to that devil ass girl with the fire ass pussy between her legs.

  “Perri? No, I can’t say I am. She must be a cutie because I know I look good,” she grinned.

  I thought the finger wave look was out of style but this older woman looked damn good with it. Thick as fuck and my dick was reacting to her. She licked her lips at me, wetting them muthafuckas and I gave in.

  “You want to chill in my room? Let me make it up to you for pushing you down,” I snickered.

  She eyed me from head to toe once more and then slipped an arm through the crook of mine.

  “I would love to.”

  __________

  I pushed my wife and kids to the back of my mind as I drilled a hole into Patrice. Luckily, I had some condoms in my room. I wouldn’t dare slip up and not use one like I did with Perri. A few weeks later, I didn’t want Patrice to hit me up telling me her ass was pregnant. Fuck that shit. I stil
l wanted my wife back, but I had to hit this shit one time and damn, I didn’t regret it.

  Gushy.

  Her shit was a fucking waterpark. Her juices were hitting me on my damn abdomen; splashing everywhere.

  “Mmmm, fuck me just like that,” her nasty ass shouted, throwing her ass back. Her fat, juicy ass. I kept my eyes trained on it and watched the ripples everytime my dick went inside her.

  Patrice was nasty with it. She twerked on my dick as if she was putting on a damn show. Gripping her cheeks, I pulled them apart and stuck my thumb in her ass. It slipped inside with ease as if her ass was use to it.

  Probably was.

  “Fuck. Fuck. Fuck,” I kept chanting. I guess me having my finger in her ass was something she loved because she got freakier and started tossing her ass back harder.

  Patrice pushed me back, got on her knees, removed the condom, and took me in her mouth - whole.

  “Biiitch…..fuuuuuuuuck!” I hissed. I gripped the back of her damn head and fucked her face as if I was in her pussy. She didn’t gag or nothing and that had my mind the fuck GONE! I didn’t stop until I was shooting my shit all over her damn face and she didn’t complain not one bit.

  I pulled back and had to stare at her for a moment before walking towards the bathroom. She followed me and grabbed a clean towel and began washing her face. No words were spoken between us. I was out of breath and was on a high from that nut.

  “Thanks,” she spoke, before walking out the room. I knew the door would lock on its own when she left, so I stepped in the shower.

  “I can’t let this shit happen again,” I said out loud, trying to convince myself. “If I wanted my family back, I had to leave these hoes alone.”

  After I was good and clean, I brushed my teeth and stepped back in the room to roll up and watch TV until my eyes got tired. As I reached for my weed, I saw my wallet open.