Hers

by Becca Jameson

  Kayla sucked in a sharp breath. She nodded. Gage was usually a good judge of where his submissive was in her mind, but he doubted himself for a moment. Was she turned on by his words? Or frightened?

  Two more strikes across her ass, and he paused again to set his palm flat on one of her butt cheeks, squeezing the pink welt and massaging the sting. “Good girl. Can you take more?”

  “Yes, Sir. Please.” Her voice wavered. She didn’t look at him.

  He released her ass and stepped back. The next line landed at the junction of her ass and her thighs.

  Kayla squealed and let go of both ropes to reach for her thighs.

  Gage dropped the flogger on the mat behind her, grasped both wrists with his hands, and lifted her arms high above her head. He released one wrist and tugged the other toward the rope, slipping the loop over her hand and then grabbing a separate loose section of rope to wrap around her wrist. The moment he tightened the knot enough to secure her, she screamed.

  “No. Stop. Stop stop stop.” She tugged at her hand. “I can’t. Stop… Red…” Her body bucked as she pulled harder on the hand now attached firmly to the cross. She reached with her other hand and plucked at the rope, attempting to dislodge herself. Her entire frame stiffened as she rose on tiptoes and fought for freedom. She screamed again in frustration…no…fear.

  Gage did the first thing he could think of. It came naturally. He flattened himself against her back, pressing her jerking frame into the cross. He pushed one leg between both of hers to get closer, his back completely enveloping hers, one hand wrapped around her under her breasts, the other reaching up to circle her flailing free wrist. “Shh. Baby… Kayla…”

  She still squirmed, but her screams settled into moans of frustration. Her breathing came heavy and irregular.

  What the hell happened? He had no idea, but for now, all he could do was reassure her.

  Gradually her jerking motions switched to trembling.

  He held her tighter, his lips landing on her ear. “I’ve got you. You’re okay. Shh… Relax.” He couldn’t undo her hand yet. He didn’t have a free limb to work with. “Deep breaths. Baby, you’re okay now. It’s over.” He loosened his grip on her wrist, gauging whether or not she could remain calm if he released her.

  Her shoulders relaxed, her hand went limp, and she let out a long exhale. “I’m sorry.” Her words were barely audible.

  “Shh,” he soothed again, his lips so close to her ear she shivered. His cock had been hard since she approached him. Now it was painfully erect against her naked ass, begging for attention it wouldn’t get tonight. He didn’t dare move for fear he would bring attention to his plight.

  He felt like an ass for experiencing such a reaction while she was clearly freaking the fuck out. But her body… Shit. She was so fucking sexy. He’d been gritting his teeth watching her pale skin pinken under his attentions. His stiff cock wasn’t something he could immediately stop when she lost it. “Talk to me, Kayla. I need to know what happened so I don’t do the same thing again. No reason to be sorry. I’m the one who should be sorry. I scared you. I just need to know what scared you.”

  She still said nothing.

  He lowered her hand to set her fingers on the wood section of the cross at the level of her head. And then he could finally stroke her cheek. He gently nudged her face toward his. He ducked his forehead to set against hers, wanting to hold her as close as possible. “Better?”

  He almost missed her subtle nod.

  “Good.” He smiled. “I’m gonna untie your hand. Hold still.” He watched her face for signs of stress. Seeing no immediate distress, he released the grip he had on her chest and lifted both hands to untie her wrist.

  The second he freed her, she exhaled and then inhaled deeply again.

  He wasn’t ready to release her body, and besides, she wasn’t either. Instead he ran his palms down her arms and threaded his fingers with hers, pressing them into the smooth wood of the frame at both sides of her face. “Concentrate on breathing.” He breathed with her, giving her time to calm down.

  Finally, she took a breath and spoke again. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean…” She stopped.

  “It’s okay. You’re entitled to wig out. It happens.” He attempted to chuckle, but it came out garbled. “Talk to me,” he repeated.

  When she pushed against him, he had no choice but to step back and release her.

  Instead of meeting his gaze and providing him with the answers to a dozen questions swimming around in his head, she turned away from him, grabbed her dress, and fled the scene.

  He stood there staring after her, shocked. What the hell just happened?

  What made her freak out? Why did she ask to be flogged in the first place? And why did she ask him to do it?

  He watched her retreating back, knowing there would be no answers to his questions. At least not tonight.

  Chapter Two

  Kayla nearly ran from the cove to the locker room. She shimmied into her dress the minute she stepped inside and leaned against the wall, thankful there were no other women currently around.

  Deep breaths. If she’d been asthmatic, someone would mistake her gasps for an attack.

  God. What the hell have I done?

  She couldn’t imagine what Gage must be thinking.

  Ugh.

  She’d thought she was ready. She’d believed she could withstand a flogging, find release from it even. It had been so long since she’d entered into a deep enough subspace to really let go.

  And this was her fault. She couldn’t blame Gage. He’d been fantastic—before, during, and after her little meltdown. She asked the right man to do the job, and then she singlehandedly fucked it up. How the hell was she going to face him again?

  Someone entered the locker room. A woman she didn’t know smiled at her and kept walking to another row of lockers.

  Kayla shoved off the wall, headed for her own locker, removed her bag, and trudged toward the entrance. She took a deep breath, said a quick prayer that Gage wouldn’t be standing outside the door, and opened it slowly.

  Relief. He was nowhere in sight. She easily slinked toward the front entrance and into the night. She assumed she must have held her breath on the way to her car, because as soon as she sat, she felt light-headed. Her hand shook as she put the key in the ignition. Why? She was safely ensconced in her nice reliable Camry.

  She glanced out the rearview mirror, found the parking lot clear, and backed out. It wasn’t until she was halfway home that she truly breathed free. What did she think would happen? That Gage would follow her into the locker room, outside, or even down the street? Screaming at her?

  Words from the past slammed into her, making her eyes water and blurring her vision. She wiped away her tears with the back of her hand so she could see the road for the last few blocks until she reached her house. Don’t fall apart until you get inside.

  She stopped at her mailbox and emptied the contents onto the seat next to her on autopilot. It was what she did every day. When she pulled into her garage, she shut the garage door behind her before getting out of the car. She shuffled through her mail on the way upstairs to the main floor, cursing at the contents. Leave it to fate to turn a miserable evening into something more heinous. She tossed the mail on the floor in the kitchen as though it were diseased and made the climb to the next floor, the bedroom level of her condo. Dropping her bag, she kicked off her heels and collapsed onto her bed. She stared at the ceiling. “Fuck.”

  She hadn’t missed Gage’s hard length pressing into her butt. In fact, a part of her longed to see it. She needed to shake that notion free. No way would seeing his cock be a good plan. Seeing would lead to touching, tasting, and…mounting. None of those were good ideas. If she couldn’t withstand a simple flogging without balking, not to mention how wigged out she got from the restraints, how the hell was she going to fuck someone?

  “Fuck,” she repeated.

  Gage was surely pissed. Right? She pictured hi
s face. He hadn’t looked anything except concerned. His brow had been furrowed with worry, and he never once mentioned the hard-on he pressed into her ass.

  She winced, words from her past flooding her mind. “You fucking cock tease… You did this, bitch… Don’t blame me… If you intend to be a cock tease, be prepared to suck…”

  Tears filled Kayla’s eyes, and she was finally in a safe enough place to let them fall freely. She rolled onto her side and curled into a ball, her fingers fisting around a corner of her pillow.

  Would she ever be normal again? No, probably not. There was no way to erase the past. The memories were stuck with her for life. That fucking asshole had scarred her in ways she would never overcome.

  Gage is different. You know it.

  He had backed off and let her go. Why? She wouldn’t have believed a man capable of such behavior after she inadvertently rubbed against his dick and made him hard. She was always so careful not to get a man turned on. But Gage… He wasn’t like other men. She hadn’t done it intentionally. It seemed he’d managed it all on his own. But was she to blame? Intellectually she knew that was all crap, but history forced her to think back on the entire episode to make sure she hadn’t encouraged him in some way.

  Not that it mattered. She’d never needed to encourage Simon in any way for him to scream at her and blame her for his stiff dick.

  But Gage had gone one step further. The man apologized to her. That wasn’t something she could wrap her head around. He’d taken the blame.

  Simon never took the blame for anything, his fault or not. Everything was always her fault. She didn’t even have to be present to ruin his day.

  Kayla took a deep breath and let it out slowly. She uncurled enough to pull a blanket over her and tuck her pillow under her head. She was safe. She’d been safe for two years. Simon could never hurt her again, and she’d be damned if she let anyone else take his place.

  •●•

  Gage dropped his workout bag on the floor next to his locker and plopped onto the bench at the gym.

  “Rough night?” Rider finished tying his shoe and smirked.

  “You could say that.”

  “Kayla Temple?”

  “Yeah.” Gage shifted his gaze to his locker, opened it, and stuffed his bag into the tiny space.

  “I heard you did a scene with her and it didn’t go so well.”

  “That sums it up.”

  “What happened?”

  “Hell if I know.” Gage ran a hand through his hair. “She asked me to flog her—”

  “Flog her? I’ve never seen her do a scene like that.”

  “Yeah, me neither. But she asked.” Gage turned toward Rider. His heart beat faster thinking about last night. He hadn’t slept well, and he was going to get his ass kicked in the ring today. “I swear I took it slow and easy. I was leery. And she was fine, at first. I think I’m a pretty good judge of a woman’s mental state. Or I thought I was.”

  “You are, dude. The best.” Rider scooted closer.

  “I warned her if she didn’t keep her hands wrapped around the ropes above her head, I would restrain her.” Gage slapped his palm over his forehead and rubbed it down his face. “I misjudged her reaction. Severely, apparently. And that isn’t like me.”

  “Not at all. And you shouldn’t beat yourself up over it either. Kayla…she has issues, don’t you think?”

  “Clearly.” Gage rolled his eyes.

  “Did you talk to her, after I mean?”

  “Nope. She bolted. I tried, but she ran.”

  “But you’re going to?”

  “Of course. First chance I get. Monday morning, I guess. I don’t exactly know where she lives, and I don’t have her number either.” Gage stood. “Let’s get to the ring. Joe is probably pacing, waiting on us to get started. And I need the workout.”

  Rider stood. “Okay, but I’m gonna kick your ass out there today. You don’t look like you slept a wink.”

  “I didn’t.” Gage pushed the door to the gym open and headed for the cage.

  “’Bout time you guys showed up.” Joe stood inside the fence, glancing at his watch and smirking. “Rough night, fellas?”

  Rider jumped onto the raised platform first. “Yeah. Somebody failed to get laid.”

  Gage shoved him into the ring. “Somebody’s about to get their teeth knocked out.” He pulled his gloves on and then stretched his torso and legs, loosening up. “How’s Emily?”

  Rider smiled. “Fantastic. Don’t think you can weaken me by bringing up my woman. It won’t work.”

  “You two were able to separate long enough to come work out? I’m surprised you didn’t bring her to the gym with you the way you’ve been plastered to her lately.”

  Rider bounced around, ready to spar. “Ha ha. You’re just jealous. If you want what I have, talk to Kayla. I know you’re interested in more than doing a scene with her. Whatever skeletons she has, flush them out and make her see you.”

  “Yeah. We’ll see. She hardly says two words to me as it is. I’m not sure she’s willing to sit down for a heart to heart.” Gage bounced into the center of the ring. He stepped to one side and stretched against the fencing. Thank God for MMA workouts. If it wasn’t for the satisfying release he got from sparring with Rider and the rest of the guys at the gym, he wasn’t sure he’d be completely sane.

  He’d only been back in Vegas for two years. Gage had enlisted in the army straight out of high school and worked for the military police. After two tours in Iraq, he’d been exhausted. When it came time to reenlist, he decided to give up the military and return home.

  Within a week, Gage met Rider at the police station and found out the man was hugely involved in MMA. Gage had dabbled in the sport in the army, so it was perfect timing and good luck that landed him at the gym with five other guys from his weight class. The owner, Joe Marks, was a gem. Gage had never made a better decision in his life. Training with Rider and the other four guys in their group had been a godsend after leaving the army.

  Even better, soon after meeting up with Rider and establishing their friendship, he learned that Rider and the other guys belonged to a fetish club nearby. The minute Gage entered Extreme for the first time, he knew he was at home. He’d researched BDSM over the years, intrigued by the concept, but he’d never been to a club. His life was perfect. He had a nice civilian job as a K-9 trainer at the police station where Rider was a cop. He had the instant bond of friends, and Extreme—the best place to loosen up and be himself at the end of the week.

  After burying himself in classes and research, Gage had turned out to be a damn good Dom. He got compliments from everyone, including the owner. And all sorts of women asked him to do scenes with them on the weekends. It was common knowledge he had a knack for spanking and flogging. He could ease the stress of anyone beneath his hand as though it were second nature.

  And then there was Kayla. The woman had shown up out of nowhere at the police academy a few weeks after Gage’s return to Vegas. He knew few details about her. She was clearly beloved by the chief of police, John Edwards, who hired her as the front desk secretary at the attached police academy where Gage’s K-9 unit was also located. She was quiet and timid. She was hardworking and diligent. And she was fucking hotter than hell.

  Every time Gage passed by her desk, he swallowed his tongue. He felt like he tripped over his words around her. When she smiled, which didn’t happen often, he melted into the floor.

  He never had the balls to approach her, and she had the most obvious barrier around her that she wore like a shield. It screamed “stay the fuck back.”

  Not that he didn’t speak to her. He did, almost every day, in an attempt to be friendly and make conversation. But her protective shell was thick, and she didn’t put off vibes that encouraged more than a professional relationship.

  A few months after, when he saw her at Extreme, he nearly dropped his soda. He was pretty sure he did swallow his tongue that time, choking so badly on the sip he had
in his mouth, he had to leave the room.

  Kayla wasn’t just smokin’ hot, she was fucking out of this world.

  And she’d shocked the hell out of him.

  She didn’t hold her head any higher than she did at work, nor did she dress as provocatively as other submissives, but her demeanor told him she was indeed submissive, or had been at one point.

  Whatever her story was, Gage was intrigued immediately. And still he hadn’t had the balls to proposition her. The first time she asked him to do a spanking scene, his dick got so hard he had to jerk off in the restroom as soon as it was over. She never once asked him for anything more than the release from the scene. No sexual overtures were made. So, he kept his cock in his pants and his palms firmly on her perfect smooth ass.

  “Dude?”

  Gage jerked his gaze to find Rider standing in the center of the ring.

  “We gonna spar, or are you gonna stand there stretching that leg for the rest of the day?” His eyes twinkled with mirth. “She has a firm grip on you, buddy. You’re going down.”

  Joe stepped closer to the center of the ring, shaking his head. “I’m losing the members of this Fight Club left and right to women. When will it end?” He threw up his hands in mock defeat. The man had dubbed the six of them The Fight Club a long time ago. And it stuck. The guys trained together and belonged to the same club, Extreme. They had each other’s backs. And Gage felt like he had an extended family.

  “Eh, we’re still here, aren’t we?” Rider asked. “I think my woman likes my abs.” He clenched his stomach, accentuating his six pack, and patted himself with his gloves. “Don’t want to lose this figure.”

  Gage rolled his eyes. “Emily? She’d fall all over you if you never lifted another muscle. Now let’s fight. I have pent up energy to burn.”

  Chapter Three

  Gage got to work early on Monday morning. His German shepherd, Thor, stayed right on his heels. He headed straight for the front desk of the police academy, thinking to confront Kayla and ask her to lunch.

  She wasn’t there yet. Marci, the private secretary for the chief of police, was at the front desk instead.