Shadow Hawk

by Jill Shalvis

  And then she found she yearned for his hands on her. “Hawk, touch me.”

  “Abby—”

  “Please? Touch me.”

  He let go of the headboard to stroke his hand down her back in a languid, sensual motion that had her stretching and nearly purring like a cat. She’d missed this. Being touched. Although she couldn’t ever remember a man’s touch making her want to melt into a puddle at his feet. Needing more, she kissed him again and his fingers tightened on her shirt, fisted in the material at the small of her back, urging her a little closer.

  When she ran her tongue along his, he made a low sound and slid his hand beneath her shirt. His fingers were callused, and his touch curled her toes as they stroked up and down, catching on her bra strap. And then somehow she was fully on top of him, kissing him wildly, spiraling out of control.

  With another of those low sexy noises deep in his throat, he rocked his hips to hers, nestling his erection against her core. Surprised, she jerked.

  “Sorry,” he gasped, and pulled back, removing his hand from beneath her shirt, slapping it back on the headboard next to his bound one, face tight, body tighter. “Sorry.”

  “No—”

  “I’m going to close my eyes,” he said in a hoarse voice, doing just that. “It might help if I can’t see how you look sitting there touching me, the feel of you on my skin, the look on your face as it hits you what that touch is doing to me—” He winced. “Christ. Even my own words are turning me on.”

  “Hawk, I’m not that fragile.”

  “I know.”

  “I just didn’t know if I was ready for this—”

  “I know that, too. It’s okay, I have a grip now.” A white-knuckled one. “Let’s try again.”

  Abby wanted to. More than anything. Because something had occurred to her. She felt no sense of panic, no claustrophobia at all as she let her fingers fall from his jaw, over his throat, down his chest, damp now, and rising and falling more quickly than when he’d run through the woods. She skimmed his abs, those amazing, sexy abs, which she wanted to trace with her tongue, then touched the edge of the towel where it was tucked into itself. It loosened.

  Gaped away from those abs.

  And her mouth watered. “Hawk, can I—”

  “Anything,” he said hoarsely, his eyes closed, his Adam’s apple bouncing as he swallowed hard. “Any-god-damn-thing you want.”

  Biting her lower lip, she scooted back on his thighs so that she could bend down and press her mouth to his chest.

  Feminine power surged through her, and she opened her mouth and licked him. He let out another rough sound but didn’t move. She watched as his nipples puckered.

  Hers did the same.

  And then, almost without her brain’s approval, her fingers tugged on his towel. It slipped free, and then whoops, look at that, spread wide, falling away from him.

  “Oh,” she breathed. He was bigger than she’d imagined. Just looking at him made her thighs tingle, and between them, much more than tingle. The sensation felt so wondrous, she went very quiet to savor every single second. Then she wrapped her hand around him.

  A strangled sound tumbled from his lips, but he held still.

  Warm metal. That’s what he felt like. “You’re big all over,” she noted a bit shakily.

  A harsh laugh escaped him. “Normally, I’d take that as a compliment, but—christ, Abby!”

  She’d bent over and kissed him, on the very tip. “Do we have a condom?” she asked, then nibbled him again.

  Another wordless sound rumbled from his chest, and his body arched up from the mattress, seeking her lips. “Bathroom,” he gasped. “Basket on the counter.”

  She rushed into the bathroom, staring for one beat at the rosy, sensual woman in the mirror, then raced back to Hawk, galvanized by the golden, sinewy body stretched before her, flexed and taut with need. “Hawk.”

  “I know.” He gulped in air and quivered. “I swear I’m trying to just sit here—”

  “I need the key.” Abby climbed back onto the bed. “I need you to touch me with both hands.”

  His head whipped up, his eyes connecting with hers. “Are you sure—”

  “Yes.”

  Nearly before she’d gotten the word out, he’d grabbed the key on the nightstand and freed himself, his hands immediately going to her hips, pulling her over him. Feeling him beneath her brought a rush of heat and more excitement, and, helplessly, she rocked her hips, frustrated by her clothes.

  “How do you want me to touch you?” His hands danced up her ribs, his fingers not quite touching her breasts, though they ached for him to. “Here?” His thumbs scraped lightly over her belly.

  Now her head fell back, and with her hips in motion, slowly rocking, oscillating, she was nothing but a bundle of raw nerve endings, racing toward the finish line.

  “Abby?”

  “Everywhere.”

  His fingers reached for the buttons on her shirt, and for a moment, she froze, because, oh, yeah, this was where she’d have to get naked…

  In the warm circle of light from the lamp, his gaze met hers. “Just me, remember?”

  “I know.” She did, she really did, but she’d liked this a lot better when she wasn’t thinking about losing her clothes.

  So gently it nearly brought tears to her eyes, Hawk cupped her face. “We can stop here, Ab. I’ll probably cry but we can stop.”

  She smiled, as he’d meant her to.

  “Yeah,” he whispered. “Love that look on you. Trust me Abby….”

  Oh, God, she really wanted to, but she wasn’t ready to bare herself, and she couldn’t force that. Twisting, she wrestled with a shoe, finally kicking it and one leg of her pants off before straddling him again.

  “Wait. Abby, wait—” His hands on her waist tightened as he looked down her legs, opened over his thighs, at what she’d exposed. “Oh, God, look at you—”

  “I need you inside me, Hawk.”

  “God, you’re beautiful. So wet.” Lightly, oh so devastatingly lightly, he stroked a thumb over her, right where she wanted him to sink into her body.

  “Now,” she nearly sobbed. “Please now.”

  “Yes, all of it, but first—” He stroked her, right at the center of her world, making her tremble, making her pant for air while with his other hand, he began to skim up her top, leaning in as if he planned on putting his mouth on the places he exposed.

  Only she didn’t want to be exposed, didn’t want to tremble. She didn’t want his tender gentleness now, she wanted him inside her, pounding until she exploded, until this desperate, almost unbearable tension left her. So she rose up on her knees and sank down over him—

  “Abby, Jesus. Wait—”

  Not stopping until he was fully seated within her.

  17

  BURIED DEEP INSIDE ABBY, the woman of his dreams, Hawk gripped her hips and tried to keep a grip on himself as well.

  She hadn’t removed any of her clothing except the absolute essentials to get him inside her. She’d barely let him touch her, and certainly hadn’t let him put his mouth on her, which he was absolutely dying to do.

  Nope, she just wanted to get to the big bang, and you know what? He was going to let her. He was going to let her do whatever she damn well wanted to do to get off, and then, when she was soft and sated and damp and dewy, he had plans, big ones. He’d lay her back, strip her out of those clothes she was using as armor, tasting every inch he exposed, making her forget every nightmare she’d had over the past year, everything but this.

  Him.

  Even his thoughts were making him hot, and he pushed up deep inside her, and, oh, God, yeah, his groan co-mingled with hers, a sound that was music to his ears. She was right there with him. Not lost in unhappy memories, but here, with him. To keep her so, he slid his hands forward on her thighs, urging her up again, guiding her nearly off him before letting go so that she sank back down, panting in a matching rhythm that shot right through him.


  Again she did it, while rocking those hips, setting him on fire. Staying still was all but impossible now, and he pushed up inside her, deep as he could get, and nearly lost it right then and there.

  Leaning over him, she fisted her hands on his chest, getting a few chest hairs in the mix, but, hey, she could rip them all out one by one for all he cared. He wanted to watch her come undone for him, listen to her cry out his name, feel her spasm around him and know he’d brought her there. Sliding a hand through her hair, he tilted her head back, exposing her sweet neck, which he kissed, making his way down to her collar. Nudging it aside as far as he could, he licked her skin, then dipped his head and kissed her breast through the material of her shirt and bra.

  “No,” she gasped. “No, I just want to—” She broke off with a frustrated sob, her hips rocking, arching, her hair in her face, her skin damp and overheated. “Please, I just need to—”

  Come. She was so desperate to get there that she was blocking herself. “Abby.” He slid his hands to her hips and slowed her down, meeting her thrust for thrust, but going deeper now, harder, more controlled.

  “I can’t—”

  “I’m hard as a rock,” he murmured, kissing her jaw, her throat. “You do that to me. Can you feel me?”

  Panting, she nodded.

  Dipping his head, he rubbed his jaw over her breast, teasing the nipple through her shirt. “You do it for me, Abby. Completely. Let me do it for you.”

  “I can’t—”

  Pushing up her shirt, he rasped his tongue over her nipple.

  She let out a sweet, shuddering sigh, and tried to move her hips faster again but he was holding them now, coaxing her to a slower rhythm, where she’d feel. Every. Single. Thing.

  “Hawk,” she whispered, clinging to him as if making sure he wouldn’t let go.

  He wouldn’t. Ever. “Right here…”

  She was panting again, warm and sweet and soft, murmuring his name over and over in his ear. The sound was the most erotic, most sensual, most heartfelt thing he’d ever heard, and just a little terrifying.

  She felt it, too.

  “Hawk?”

  “Right here with you,” he promised, breathing with her as he thrust up deep inside her, loving the feel of her breasts pressed to his chest, her thighs hugging his. His hands slipped down, cupping her ass, pulling her in, absorbing her soft gasp with his mouth.

  She was going to come for him now, he could feel it in the desperate clutch of her hands, could see it in the way her eyes turned glossy and opaque. And then, with his name on her lips, she shattered, her body shuddering in his arms with so much sweet bliss it triggered his own release, dragging him under the wave of searing pleasure with her. He plunged into her one last time, trembling as he came from the tips of his toes, from every cell in his body, from the depths of his heart.

  And as he went over, he had one thought—God, don’t let me fall in love.

  Yet as his vision faded, as an almost painful heat poured through him endlessly, he knew that whatever it was, it was much, much more than simple lust.

  ABBY CAME BACK TO HERSELF in slow degrees, lethargic, replete, and more sated than she had any right to be, given their situation.

  She was sprawled over Hawk’s lap, her pants hooked on one ankle, her shirt half-opened and one breast revealed, the tip of which he was absently rasping with one callused thumb.

  She had her face plastered to his throat, and as she took stock, she was very glad he couldn’t see her face. Her legs were spread wide over his, her hands clutching him as if she never intended to let him go free.

  As for his hands, well, he’d gotten quite comfortable with her body, hadn’t he. His other one was intimately gripping her bottom, lightly gliding over her skin, making her want to, even now, stretch like a damn kitten and expose her belly for more.

  Good God.

  His face was buried in her hair, and with a long, pleasure-filled sigh, he lifted his head. His eyes were heavy with sleep, and extremely sexy as he smiled at her, looking quite pleased with himself. “Hey.”

  “Hey.” She had no idea what to do or say, a definite first.

  “You okay?”

  “I think you know damn well that I surpassed okay.”

  He grinned.

  Oh, yes, very pleased with himself, wasn’t he.

  Tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, he let that finger do the talking, stroking it down her throat and over her bared shoulder, where it caught on her shirt.

  “Maybe next time, we could lose a few clothes,” he murmured.

  “You’re not wearing any.”

  “I meant you.”

  She looked down at her bedraggled self and sighed. “Yeah. I guess I stupidly thought that leaving them on would be like wearing armor.”

  His smile faded. “No stupid. You had quite a bit to overcome.”

  And speaking of that…she had come. Probably if he so much as touched her again, she could do it again in a blink. “I didn’t expect it to be so…” She searched for a word, and failed to find one that suitably did the job. “Wow.”

  “Me either.”

  Okay, so she wasn’t alone in that. That was good. It might have been a little more embarrassing if she had been.

  “Abby?”

  She worked on meeting his gaze.

  “You don’t need armor with me.”

  No. No, she hadn’t. And if that wasn’t completely unnerving, Abby had no idea what was. She held his sincere gaze and sighed again. “I know. But I also know we don’t have time for this.”

  He looked as if he might argue, then nodded instead. “Sleep?”

  “Shower first.” And using that as a reason to escape, she got up, somehow managed to ignore the urge to cover her good parts, and headed to the bathroom mirror.

  Oh, boy.

  Her cheeks were rosy, her eyes glowing. And so was her body.

  Who’d have thought that damn fine sex would be part of the cure?

  Not just sex, she told herself as she got into the shower. She’d had a healthy sex life before the raid, and what she’d just done with Hawk, while very hot and very unexpected, wasn’t it.

  It was something much, much more.

  Which made this the scariest part of the entire past twelve hours.

  18

  AFTER HER SHOWER, ABBY looked at her filthy clothes and sighed, then held up what Serena had brought her. A black and sparkly sweater, low cut. Jeans, which had been made to fit like a glove.

  She turned back to her clothes, but yep, they were still disgusting. Worse, her panties had somehow ripped and were useless. With another sigh, she pulled on Serena’s clothes, knowing she’d never fill them out the way their hostess did. But her goal here was survival, not winning a beauty contest.

  Abby opened the bathroom door, and found herself hesitating. She was embarrassed at how she’d let go with Hawk, and wasn’t sure she could handle looking at him.

  He’d left a light on for her, and that alone was enough to warm her from the inside out. She opened her mouth to thank him, but closed it again.

  Oh. My. Goodness.

  There he was, right where she’d left him, sprawled face down on the bed.

  Completely in the buff.

  Eyes closed, back rising and falling with his deep breathing, he was out cold.

  He hadn’t even pulled the covers over him, not that she minded the chance to stand there and look her fill without him being aware of it. Good God, but the man had it going on. Legs that went on forever, long, sleek, smooth back, broad shoulders, rippled arms that knew exactly how to hold onto a woman….

  And then there were the good parts. She let her eyes linger in all the NC-17 spots until he suddenly rolled to his back, one arm flung up and over his eyes. She spent another moment taking in the new and even better view.

  “Are you going to get over here?” he murmured in a sleep-roughened voice. “Or just stare at me all night?”

  Crap. “I, um…”


  Eyes still closed, he patted the mattress at his side.

  Her feet made the decision for her, carrying her across the room until the mattress bumped her thighs. Without looking, he unerringly flung out his hand and caught hers, pulling her down to his side. “Just an hour,” he said, and tugged her into his arms, apparently unconcerned by the fact that once again he was naked and she fully dressed.

  Well, it hadn’t bothered him earlier, she told herself, and let herself relax into him. And not just relax, but press her face into his throat. She might have also inhaled deeply, and then snuggled even closer.

  In response, he sighed with pleasure and ran his hands up and down her back in the most soothing gesture she’d ever experienced. So why her body tingled, suddenly hopeful that it was going to get another man-made orgasm, she had no idea.

  “Still fully clothed,” he murmured, and she could hear the smile in his voice.

  Along with exhaustion. “Sleep,” she ordered.

  “I know…I am…” He snuggled in. “Abby?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Maybe next time, you could be naked, too….”

  Yeah, she had to admit, lying skin to skin with him would be pretty damn amazing. “Maybe…”

  He let out a shuddering sigh.

  “Maybe even…” She was crazy. “Now…”

  Another sigh, but no words.

  Lifting her head, she stared down into his face.

  He’d fallen back asleep.

  The irony did not escape her. She was finally ready to shed the last of her armor, and what happened? The guy she was ready to share it with was dead to the world.

  HAWK AND ABBY MADE IT INTO Cheyenne two hours and twelve minutes later. Hawk had allowed himself to pass out for an hour and a half before he’d gotten them back on the road.

  Now they were in Serena’s borrowed SUV, only a few miles from Abby’s condo, and he still hadn’t figured out a safe place to leave her while he retrieved her laptop. She’d adamantly refused to stay at the B&B. “Do you have family in the area?”

  She turned and leveled him with those baby blues. She wore Serena’s clothes, and having discovered her ripped panties in the trash, he knew she was currently commando, a situation that was wreaking havoc with his thought process.