On Demon Wings (Experiment in Terror #5)

by Karina Halle

  Outside, the rain was falling. I could hear it on the window panes and roof. And beyond that I heard the hushed breathing of a bunch of people trying to be quiet and failing at it.

  Finally, I reached over and wiped my eyes. They had been crusted shut with gross dried fluid.

  They fluttered open and I took in the blurry sight of a spinning room.

  My room.

  It was daytime and at the foot of my bed were my mother, my father, Ada and Maximus.

  Ada was holding a baseball bat in her hands, holding it like it was painful to do so. She was turned sideways and looked as if she were about to leave.

  The others were watching me curiously and with bated breath, their bodies tensed as if they were about to fight. Or flee.

  From me.

  I wanted to raise my head to get a better look but it was too heavy. I could only lie there with my chin dipped and watch them. Watch them watch me.

  Maximus was the first to speak. “Perry. Is that you?”

  What kind of question was that?

  I cleared my throat a few times before words came out. “Of course, it’s me.”

  Everyone relaxed visibly except Ada. She turned to face me.

  I gasped.

  She had a laceration on right side of her forehead and a band-aid on her cheek near her eye.

  I immediately knew why she had the bat. Why she didn’t want to have the bat. I had done that to her. I had done it when I was something else.

  “What else did I do?” I asked. No one said anything.

  “Someone tell me what I did!” I screamed, then collapsed into a coughing fit.

  “She needs water,” Maximus said, leaving the room.

  By the time my coughing calmed down, he was approaching me with a glass of it.

  “Play nice,” he said with a smile. It didn’t reach his eyes.

  I nodded attentively, unable to speak. He put the cup of water on the bedside table, then quickly backed away. I frowned at him as I gulped the cool water down.

  “I’m not going to bite you.”

  “You tried, though,” he answered, rubbing his arm. He stood beside my parents again.

  “Perry, we don’t know what’s going on with you,” my father said as if I’d just been in a foul mood the last few days. “Tomorrow we’re taking you to the hospital. To get you checked out.”

  “Dad, I told you that’s not going to work,” Ada said, shifting the bat to her other hand.

  My dad raised his hand at her dismissively. “Ada, I have heard just enough of this nonsense. It’s ridiculous and it’s...it’s sacrilegious. Completely sacrilegious. The church doesn’t even believe in demonic possession.”

  “Yes they do!” she said. “I’ve been reading about it!”

  “Oh, in that wonderful little tome that your sister brought home from the library?”

  “Yes!” she yelled. “In there, online, everywhere. Maximus agrees with me! Tell them, Maximus.”

  She gestured at my parents with the bat and looked at Maximus keenly.

  He wiggled his lips and shrugged. “It’s true that some people, in the church, believe that demonic possession happens. I certainly ain’t saying it’s impossible. But Ada, look at Perry. Do you think that’s what is happening?”

  She rolled her eyes and slammed the bat against her palm. “Holy fuck, yes, you retard! You have some inbreeding going down there in the South? Is that what’s wrong with you?”

  “Ada!” my mom admonished, stepping closer to my father.

  I slowly placed my cup back down and watched it unfold. It’s like I wasn’t even there.

  Maximus glared at her. “What I’m saying is what your parents are saying. Perry is sick. She’s ill. Like her shrinkaroo says. And she’s been reading a lot of books. She’s convinced this is happening to her. It’s not her fault at all. The mind is a powerful thing. I reckon she’s as good as being possessed by her own self.”

  She turned her back to him in disgust and looked pleadingly at dad. “You can’t take her to the hospital. They’re going to think she’s crazy.”

  My parents exchanged a loaded look. They thought I was crazy.

  “It’s not up for discussion,” my dad eventually told her.

  “Dad-” she began to say but was cut off.

  By me.

  I was screaming.

  I had picked up the glass of water and hurled it at them. My mother ducked and the glass smashed into a million pieces against the wall.

  The control was taken from me again and I was helpless. I didn’t black out, either. I just watched myself as I leaped out of bed like a rocket and ran along the bed heading straight for my mother.

  Maximus was faster. As I bounced off the bed and into the air toward my mom’s sickened face, he tackled me from the side and brought me down to the ground.

  I couldn’t do anything to stop myself. My body was no longer mine. But I felt the pain from the impact. That wasn’t fair.

  I wailed and moaned and made guttural noises that made my whole body arch and shudder while Maximus held me down with all his strength, his muscles twisting, his face turned red and sweaty as he looked into my eyes. But he wasn’t seeing me. He wasn’t seeing me.

  “Pills,” he cried out. He looked up at my parents while I tried to lean forward and bite his hand. “Get the pills! Get some rope!”

  My dad grabbed the rope he had used the other night from the corner of the room and my mom brought the pill bottles out from her cardigan pocket. My dad quickly tied the rope around my arms and legs like he was hog-tying in a rodeo and trying to beat his best time.

  My mother leaned over me with the pills dangling between her fingers. I snapped at her.

  “Going to be a bit difficult,” Maximus said to her.

  She shook her head grimly. “I learned a trick back in the day. Hold her chin.”

  He went for my chin with his large hands. He had the right to look scared to death of me. I tried biting him again.

  But it was a distraction. As I did that, my mother pressed down on my forehead with one hand and pinched my nose shut with the other. I clamped my mouth like a vice. I didn’t want to take the pills and neither did the thing inside me. But I had to breathe.

  I gasped, my mouth open. I, we, couldn’t take it. My mom dropped the pills in and kept her grip on my nose until I had no choice but to swallow.

  Next thing I knew I was slowly regaining control of my body.

  “I’m sorry,” I said, trying to focus on my parents as Maximus picked me up and put me back into bed.

  “We know you are,” he said to me. His drawl was so gentle that I almost forgot he thought it was all in my head. “We’re going to have to keep you tied up, though. You understand, darling’?”

  “Don’t call me darlin’,” I managed to say.

  He smiled. “Good to see you’re still with us. But just so your, er, other self knows...your father has the police alerted to what’s going on. In case you get any more out of hand. And, I’m afraid, that despite what your sister thinks, the hospital is going to be the best place for you. I’m just sorry I didn’t know about this sooner, Perry. I’m sorry I actually thought you were haunted. I would have never gone along with the clearing thing; it just made things worse. It gave proof to the delusion.”

  But you saw! I thought, now too weak to say anything. You saw the beast! You’re a liar. A goddamn liar!

  He stroked the hair off my forehead. I flinched and glared at him, which only made him point at my dad. “I think we might need some more rope here.”

  “You guys are fucking sick,” Ada snarled from the back of the room. She shook her head and held herself tightly. “I can’t stand here and watch you do this. I won’t.”

  She shot me one last look. It was a look I couldn’t read. She left the room and my heart sank.

  My dad re-did the ropes on my arms and legs so I was strapped down to the bed. There was a moment where I was free. Where I thought about shoving him off and run
ning away. I didn’t know where, but I would leave the house and run to the river and just run and run until they couldn’t find me. I’d be safe there. I wouldn’t be dragged off to the hospital. I’d still have this thing inside of me, Abby, a demon, whatever it was, but at least I wouldn’t be carted off to a hospital. I didn’t want to destroy myself in a sterile room. Like a dying dog, I wanted to go somewhere far away and quiet. It was the last thing left that I could control.

  But I didn’t move. I didn’t make a run for it, even though I could have. My dad finished tying me up, avoiding my eyes the whole time. He left the room with my mother. Then it was just Maximus and me.

  He pulled up the chair from the desk and looked me over. His green eyes glittered apologetically but it wasn’t enough. I had wanted more from him. I had wanted someone who would have fought to the death over me. I wanted someone who’d sacrifice for me. Someone who had my back. Someone who would save me if I couldn’t save myself.

  That was not Maximus. It never had been. I was just a quick fuck to him. Never anything else.

  Story of my life.

  “I’m sorry it has to be this way, Perry,” he said, knowing better than to call me darling again. “I really like you. A lot. I mean an awful, ridiculous amount.”

  You’ve got to be kidding me. Was he breaking up with me? We weren’t even in a relationship.

  “But you need so much more than I can give you,” he went on, running his fingers down my arm. “You need help and I’m going to help you as much as I can, but you have to help yourself too. It’s a darn shame this had to happen. I think we could have really had something. And, well, maybe someday we can. I think we’d make quite the team. You know, outside of all this. Especially if you agree to doing the show with me. When you’re better, of course.”

  That did it.

  “Maximus,” I said.

  He gave me an inquisitive look. “What?”

  I spat in his face with all the nastiness I could muster. The ball of spit landed right on his nose.

  I smiled viciously at the look of shock on his face. “That was from me, too. The real Perry.”

  He gave me a mean little smile, then wiped his nose and got up. He put the chair back, saying “I’ll be staying overnight here. I’ll come see you later.”

  He pulled the door behind him until it was a few inches open. I was alone with my thoughts until the pills kicked in and pulled me into a haze.

  Of course, I was never really alone anymore.

  I might never be alone again.

  CHAPTER NINETEEN

  The rest of the day passed by in radical shifts. I was drugged and under for periods of time. Then I’d awake, squirming in the bed, almost rising above it, kept in place only by the ropes that kept me down. I was out of control, then in control, then out of control, then in control. The thing and I switched on and off but I didn’t get to call the shots. I could only get him/her/it to leave when I concentrated hard enough. But it drained me and I’d fall back asleep again.

  People came and went. Time slowed down. My mother came in and sat beside me for awhile. She couldn’t look me in the eyes. I didn’t know if it was because she was ashamed or hurt or because my eyes now belonged to someone else. She said, “This doesn’t get easier,” and patted my arm.

  I never got any more out of it. My dad was even briefer. I could see the guilt in his face was eating him alive. I should have been happy about that, but it just made me feel sad.

  Maximus offered to spoon feed me dinner. I told him I’d barf on him like Linda Blair in The Excorcist. He didn’t broach the topic of food after that.

  But the one person I wanted to see, Ada, had stayed away. I knew she was aching and I knew I must have hurt her terribly when I attacked her. I still didn’t know exactly what had gone down but I knew it must have been traumatizing to be attacked by your sister, even one as unpredictable as me. Still, I figured she’d come by and visit. Tell me something to cheer me up. Talking about fixing me and getting me out of there and how I wouldn’t have to go to a mental institute (because, let’s face it, that’s where I’d be going in the long run). But it would have just been talk anyway. She wouldn’t be able to help me. And that’s why she was staying away. It hurt too much to see me like this.

  But it would hurt me less if I could see her.

  I sighed and closed my eyes. It was night and still raining steadily. Cold seeped in through the windows and sat thickly in the air. I had heard my parents talking earlier about how cold it was in the room, that the thermostat must be broken. They were so oblivious, I swear.

  “How are you feeling?” Maximus asked.

  He was back in the room with me, sitting at the desk and using my computer. He turned in his seat, watching me.

  “How do you think I’m feeling?”

  “Do you feel like killing anyone?”

  “Aside from you?”

  He got up and came over to me, towering high and mighty, his red coif almost reaching the ceiling.

  “Are you scared?” he asked.

  I shot him a testy look. “What do you think? I’m tied to my fucking bed.”

  “It’s for your own safety. And everyone else’s. If we were to let you loose...”

  “Loose? I’m not a fucking animal.”

  “Part of you is. You know it.”

  I did know it. I knew why I was tied down. I knew, and I was almost grateful because it meant I couldn’t hurt the ones I loved. I knew the minute I was free that’s exactly what the thing would make me do.

  “Just get through tonight,” he said soothingly. “Things will turn around tomorrow.”

  “And what will you do when the men in the white coats take me away? What will you say then? Will you still ask me if I’m scared?” My voice started to tremble. I couldn’t help it. I felt the thing entering part of my head and squatting, waiting for an opportunity. When I was scared, upset, when my guard was down, that’s when it would prey on me. I was starting to predict it. I wanted to warn Maximus, to tell him to step away from me. But part of me wanted to hurt him for hurting me and I didn’t know what part.

  “Wherever you end up, Perry, it’ll be for the best,” he said, as if he knew. “They’ll make you new again. The doctors will help you. They’ll treat you. You’ll be given medicine and it’ll fix you. Those mental institutions have a bad rap, you know that. But they do more good than harm, especially for people like you. It may be scary at first, but you’ll be fixed. You’ll be as good as new.”

  “Are you sure about that, Max?” someone said.

  The voice was shocking in its familiarity, the way it made the arms on my hair stand up. It was low, rich, deep.

  And hardened.

  Maximus flinched and whipped his head toward the door. His burly frame was blocking my view and I could only crane my neck so far to see who else was in the room.

  I saw Ada walk past the foot of the bed, her eyes locked to mine, warning me about something.

  Then Maximus, in his most disbelieving drawl, said, “What in God’s name are you doing here?” and moved over just enough so that I could see Dex standing in the doorway.

  The room swirled in slow motion. I couldn’t breathe. My eyes widened and froze that way. My body tensed up. My heart lurched around from a million emotions I couldn’t even name.

  Dex. My Dex. My Dex who broke up my heart. My Dex was in my bedroom.

  He looked older somehow. My mind was barely processing thought but somehow I was able to fixate on the little details of him. Time stood still.

  His shoulders seemed a bit wider and there was a bit more beef to his arms, which poked out of black t-shirt, his damp cargo jacket flung over one forearm. I don’t know why I thought he would have gone skinnier with grief or something. Wishful thinking. His face was different too. The eyebrow ring was gone and he had a thin layer of scruffy facial hair like he only shaved every couple of days. It suited him. His eyes were the same. Deep brown, shiny and a million degrees of intensity.
>
  He wasn’t moving, just standing there. His expression went from surprise to indignation to rage as he looked me over, taking in the sorry sight that I was.

  Then he sprang into action. He stormed into the room, his arms gesturing wildly to me, and marched right up to Maximus and got in his face. Or almost his face, since Maximus was taller.

  “What the fuck is this?” Dex yelled waving his arms wildly. “What are you doing to her?”

  “What the fuck is this? What the fuck are you? Why are you here? You shouldn’t be here!” Maximus said right back to him, not backing down.

  “You should thank your freckled ass that I’m here,” he shot back, closing the space between them.

  “Guys!” Ada yelled from the other side of me. “It’s OK, I invited him.”

  I looked at her incredulously. She mouthed “sorry” to me.

  “Why would you do a stupid thing like that?” Maximus said to her across the bed.

  “Stupid?” she squawked. “I’m not going to sit back and let you tie my sister to her own bed, pretend you know what the hell is going on with her and then cart her off to a hospital tomorrow when we all know she’s probably not going to be coming back!”

  I was touched by my sister’s loyalty and her built-in ferocity. I felt the tears creeping up in my eyes, all too overwhelmed by the situation, what was going to happen to me, and the fact that the man who had broken my soul and made my last few months a living hell, was standing a few feet away from me.

  And then I felt that little twitch in my brain, like bugs were crawling in underneath a door. Something was choosing this time, of all times, to take over. I tried to force the blackness out, the suffocating cloak or pure evil. My eyes rolled back in my head and fluttered involuntarily as I concentrated.

  “What’s wrong with her?” Dex asked gently, his voice strained. He came closer.

  “I’d stay away if I were you, son,” Maximus said, putting his arm out to stop him.

  Dex shot him a dirty look and threw his arm off of him. He stopped right by the bed and crouched down so that his face was at my level. I wanted to look at him but I couldn’t. I had to fight and fight harder because I was losing.