Let Love Find You

by Johanna Lindsey

Not until he got home did he realize he’d forgotten to return the bloody hat, which was still in his pocket. But Amanda could collect it at the farm. He just wished he wasn’t looking forward to her next visit so much.

  Chapter Thirty

  OPHELIA HAD KEPT AMANDA so busy yesterday, she hadn’t felt like going to any of the parties she’d been asked to attend last night and had simply gone to bed early. Her new riding ensemble had arrived late in the afternoon, and she was feeling much better about her next riding lesson. Dare she say she was even looking forward to it, now that she was so sure the biggest hurdle was out of the way? But she didn’t fall right to sleep.

  She’d tried to imagine Kendall and herself riding in the park together, pictured herself on a lovely white mare that she was able to handle exceptionally well thanks to Devin. But she kept seeing Devin riding beside her instead. Well, she could blame that on her lessons, which had barely begun. She was taking one too many steps ahead, placing Kendall beside her before she mastered riding. Just thinking she could ride didn’t make it so.

  But then the memory of that kiss snuck up on her and wouldn’t go away. Again, she tried to pretend it was Kendall doing the kissing. That would have made it so much more exciting, she was sure. Yet, that actual kiss had been the most exciting thing she’d ever experienced with a man. While she assured herself Kendall would do even better, she kept seeing amber eyes looking deeply into hers. How aggravating! Obviously, she needed to actually kiss Kendall to make sure he followed her into her dreams instead of Devin. With a low growl, she put her pillow over her head and started counting sheep.

  But this morning she was in a chipper mood. Optimism was an amazing thing, brightening the day and putting a smile on her face. Suddenly, once again, she had two men to choose from! Robert Brigston had been forgiven for his less than circumspect behavior the other night. His scandal had died a quick death. Larissa had jotted her a note all about it, but the note had been delivered to the wrong house yesterday, so Amanda didn’t receive it until this morning.

  It occurred to her that she could forgo any more riding lessons and simply concentrate on Robert, but she put that thought aside. Now that she felt riding was something she could accomplish, she wanted to see it through for herself, not just for Kendall—even if it meant she had to continue dealing with Devin.

  When she arrived at the farm a little later that morning, she stood in the open doorway of Devin’s little office for a few moments before Devin noticed her arrival. He was sitting at the desk, slowly pounding his fist on something flat and circular. She couldn’t imagine what it was, but he seemed to be trying to flatten it. No, actually, he didn’t really seem to be paying attention to what he was doing, looking quite pensive, even brooding. Was this his typical demeanor when he was alone? She wasn’t going to let his dour disposition ruin her splendid mood.

  “Hello!” she said cheerily.

  He glanced up. “I was expecting you yesterday,” he said in a grouchy tone. “When you didn’t show, I figured you were going to abandon this project.”

  “Not a’tall. It just took some time to get this skirt made.”

  She didn’t spread her legs as she’d done in the demonstration for her family, but she pulled the brown velvet material to the side so he could see she wasn’t wearing a skirt. She thought that would get a smile out of him. It was his idea, after all.

  But all she got was a nod and a mumbled “Perfect” as he stood up.

  “And besides,” she continued, having trouble maintaining a perky tone now, though she still tried, “Pheli pinned me down yesterday to help with the big party she’s having at Norford Hall in a couple of weeks.”

  “I received an invitation. It doesn’t sound like it’s just for your brother’s birthday.”

  “No, it’s going to be a typical country party with all sorts of fun things to do! And there will be a ball to finish it off. D’you think you can have me ready for the party?”

  “Can horses fly?”

  She laughed and lightly scolded, “Oh, come now, it’s not that far-fetched. I’m feeling much better about it now, thanks to you and this newfangled riding habit.”

  “Glad to hear it.” He raised a brow. “Is that gathering at Norford also an occasion to present all the best eligibles for you?”

  “Of course! D’you think Lord Kendall will be back from France in time? Pheli found out his address and sent him an invitation, of course.”

  “So he’s still at the top of your list? No new callers lately you’re considering instead?”

  He sounded a little too curious, as if he was waiting with bated breath for her answer. Was he still considering her his good deed? Still intended to meddle in her affairs? After she’d made it perfectly clear she didn’t want his help? Well, not in that regard. She did want his help with her riding lessons, and maybe some advice about men if she could get up the nerve to ask him.

  She gave him the simple truth. “I don’t receive callers other than my friends, haven’t since my first Season. And before you make some snide remark about that being responsible for my unmarried state, I’m sure I told you that I don’t encourage men I’m simply not interested in. Kendall will be allowed to call when he returns. And—” She snapped her mouth shut, deciding not to mention Lord Robert, when all they’d done was argue about him before.

  But Devin wasn’t letting that by. “And?”

  She tsked. “I’m sure you’ve heard that the truth came out about Robert Brigston, that he’d merely imbibed too much at the ball because of his nervousness, resulting in his overexuberance with the ladies, and his saying things he doesn’t even remember saying.”

  “Your brother bought that nonsense, I suppose?” Devin asked brusquely.

  “Why wouldn’t Rafe be understanding about it? He’s done some foolish things when he’s been foxed, too.”

  “That is the nature of drink. But—never mind. Why don’t you just trust me on this: that boy isn’t for you. I’d recommend that fortune hunter Farrell Exter before I would Brigston. At least Exter would worship you for what you could bring to his impoverished family.”

  “Then it’s a good thing I’m not taking your recommendations! Besides, the Exters aren’t impoverished, Farrell simply isn’t in line for the title or the wealth, so of course he’s looking for a rich wife and is honest enough to make no bones about it. Now why are you so dead set against Robert?! Just because you didn’t pick him for me?”

  “Of course. That’s the only reason.”

  She narrowed her eyes at his quick agreement, not believing him for a minute. But she noticed his hand was pressing down on that flat thing he’d been pounding, as if he was trying to hide it now. She suddenly recognized its color.

  She gasped. “Is that my hat?”

  “I’m afraid I sat on it.”

  She turned wide eyes on him. He ought to be blushing but he wasn’t. If anything, he looked defensive.

  “One of the men must have cleaned off my desk and knocked it on my chair, then forgot to put it back.”

  “And you decided it wasn’t flat enough so you had to pound on it, too?”

  The blush she’d expected showed up, but it was so slight, she barely noticed it with his dark tan. “Of course not.”

  So he had just been distractedly pounding on her hat without realizing it. No matter. She wasn’t about to argue with him about a silly hat. To prove it, she smiled and remarked, “Poor hat, it deserves a burial at the very least. Now, shall we get to my lessons?”

  He abruptly took her elbow and led her around to the middle aisle. “Where’s your chaperone?”

  “He got distracted by your horses as we drove up and walked down to the left field for a closer look at some of them.”

  Devin sighed. “I warned you not to bring your brother.”

  “I didn’t.” She kept the smirk to herself.

  But she almost laughed at Devin’s expression when her chaperone came up the aisle to join them. He’d wanted her to bring a m
ale relative along, but he obviously wasn’t expecting it to be the Duke of Norford.

  Chapter Thirty-One

  DEVIN DIDN’T LIKE SURPRISES of this sort, but he recovered quickly enough, thanks to Preston Locke’s friendly and easygoing manner. And the man wanted to talk horses! That put Devin even more at ease. Yet he didn’t doubt for a moment that the minx had done this deliberately to discomfit him. Dragging such an important personage along to something so trivial as a riding lesson? When she had an abundance of male relatives of less stature?

  So when he got her on the track with her father leaning on the fence rail some distance away watching them, he told her, “No screaming, no fainting, and since you brought your esteemed father to watch, no falling off Sarah today.”

  He tossed her up into the saddle. She looked down at him to demand, “And what’s that got to do with him?”

  “It will reflect badly on me, not you.”

  She snorted delicately but said no more.

  Despite her bravado, he could still sense her nervousness, but it wasn’t nearly as extreme as what she’d felt the other day. So most of his brusque sarcasm was intended to help her keep her fears at bay.

  As he handed her the reins, he unbent enough to say, “I left orders for Sarah to be exercised daily, so she’s no longer eager for a brisk run. Pace yourself and she’ll accommodate. Don’t worry, you’re going to shine.”

  “I have to, with him watching.”

  So that’s why she’d brought her father today? He provided incentive for her to excel? Devin chided himself for thinking her motive had had anything to do with him. The girl probably didn’t give him a thought once he was out of her sight. Why should she? She had so many men ready to hand her their hearts she couldn’t keep track of them all—first sons titled or in line to be titled, even second and third sons hoping to get lucky—and none of them illegitimate.

  But he didn’t have the luxury to forget about her once she was out of sight because she was a job to him. He assured himself that was the only reason she filled his thoughts when he wasn’t with her.

  “I’ve been meaning to discuss something with you,” she said in a low, secretive tone. “I have no trouble telling if a man finds me attractive enough to, well, you know, but is there something obvious I should be aware of that can help me determine which ones I feel the same about—other than finding them pleasing to the eyes?”

  Devin stiffened. Was she serious? Her innocent, curious look said she was.

  “Does your heart quicken?” he asked.

  “You mean like now? That’s just nervousness!”

  “I’m talking about how you feel when you’re around these men you find attractive. Do you want to get close enough to them to touch them? Are you eager to see them again? Do you think about them constantly?”

  Eyes wide, she said, “Thank you! That does clear it up a bit, and why the deuce couldn’t my brother tell me that?”

  Devin laughed. “You’re his baby sister. He’s not going to discuss desire with you.”

  His blunt words left her blushing. If any other woman had asked him that question, he would have thought she was just being flirtatious, but not Amanda. He actually knew more about her now than she’d been willing to volunteer, and now he could add curious to the list. He knew that she was persistent, tenacious, that she wouldn’t drop a subject she’d sunk her teeth into. And she was courageous, exceptionally so. But she was hot-tempered, too, at least with him she was. She might still like fishing. He could offer to take her fishing to find out for sure. He enjoyed the pastime himself. And she liked to gamble on horses, but not at cards. He’d have to keep all of this in mind.

  The session went exceptionally well. Amanda obviously thought so, too, because she chattered nonstop as they walked back to the stable, laughing with her father, effervescence bubbling over, Little Miss Sunshine again.

  Before she and her father left, she told Devin, “I think after a few more lessons I will be at the point where I will have to decide if I’m going to take up riding seriously enough to warrant having my own mount. I’ll want a white mare if it comes to that. Have you any I can purchase?”

  “Why white?”

  “Because the only other time I thought about riding again was when I admired an acquaintance on a white horse. I determined that if I ever rode, it would have to be on a magnificent animal like hers.”

  “They aren’t all that common, you know. And the few I have are definitely too fast for you—at this point. They’ll demand a hard gallop the moment you mount them. I’m not saying the day won’t come when you’ll be up for that, but I certainly wouldn’t recommend it now.”

  Her lips turned down in an adorable pout. “Well, that’s disappointing.”

  “Buck up, m’dear,” Preston said, and chucked her chin. “You’re going to want a gentle animal like the one you’re learning on. Don’t make me worry about this endeavor by buying a horse you can’t easily handle.”

  “Then I’ll let you find me one,” she said, grinning at her father. “But it must be white!”

  Both men rolled their eyes at her, but Devin stared after the coach as they drove off. He’d actually, for that briefest moment between Preston’s suggestion and Amanda’s declining it, had the notion to present Amanda with Sarah when she finished her lessons. But since he’d rather not part with Sarah, he wondered why he’d even had the thought! Simply because he’d thought she might appreciate the gesture? An idea designed to please her? Bloody hell, what was wrong with him?

  His mood turned sour after that near blunder, though if he admitted it, it was partially because he didn’t have the kind of mount Amanda wanted. But with his disposition on a downslide, it was probably an excellent time to visit William’s moneylender to take care of that nasty business for his friend.

  He wanted to check on Will anyway, to make sure he was still mending well at home, and to pick up the money he was returning to cancel Will’s debt. If Blythe did still need a dowry, Devin would sell that town house he had no use for and just wouldn’t mention it to Will. But he didn’t think he’d have to, especially if Lord Oliver opened his eyes wide enough to see what a gem Blythe was. Devin had caught them twice now deep in conversation and laughter at social events, so he had a feeling that had already happened.

  Before long he was heading to the seedier side of town. He had the lender’s name, Nathaniel Gator, and his address. It still took awhile to find the place since Devin had never been to that part of London before.

  He didn’t realize it was a private residence he was entering when he simply opened the door and walked in. A knock might have been appropriate, but then he wasn’t there to be appropriate. But he did interrupt a couple of men who were talking in the large foyer.

  “Yet another bleedin’ nabob?” the bigger of the two men said with a derogatory glance. “Wot are ye gents doing? Passin’ my boss’s name around at yer fancy parties?”

  The other man, tall, lean, and finely clothed, swung around and looked a bit shaken when Devin met his eyes. Embarrassed, no doubt, to be found by someone he knew in a sordid place like this.

  Devin wasn’t going to pretend he didn’t recognize him. He nodded at the young man. “Lord Trask.”

  “You in debt, too, old chap?” John Trask asked, his tone actually sounding hopeful.

  Devin supposed it would make the fellow feel less embarrassed if they were both in the same dire straits. Devin had heard that Trask had gambling debts, apparently too many if he had to come to a lender like this to get them paid off. Devin should warn him about the underhanded dealings that occurred here and probably would—once he was done with his task.

  “No, I’m here for payback of a different sort,” Devin said as he moved closer to the two men. And to the bruiser, he said, “You Gator’s strong-arm?”

  “Wot if I am?”

  “Your boss picked the wrong man for one of his lessons, a friend of mine,” Devin explained. “I’m here to make sure it never happens
again.”

  He slammed his fist against the man’s cheek, but it barely moved the brute. Devin grinned, anticipating a good workout now. One of the nonmandatory classes at his school had been fisticuffs. Unlike his performance in the etiquette classes, he’d excelled in the ring, not by brute force, but from the skills he was taught. So even a bruiser such as Gator’s strong-arm was bound to go down—eventually. It did take about ten minutes though.

  Trask didn’t stick around to watch. Devin didn’t even notice that the lord slipped out while he was busy getting a few bruised ribs himself.

  With the bruiser barely conscious on the floor, Devin leaned over to pat his cheeks. “Where’s your boss?”

  The man pointed down the hall. Devin headed that way and opened a few doors before he found Gator behind one. Sleeping. In the chair behind the desk. Devin didn’t believe it.

  “Really? Pretending to sleep through that racket?”

  The man didn’t stir. He was middle-aged, nearly bald, and corpulent. A rather large tray containing empty plates lay on the desk. Devin supposed a heavy meal could have put the man to sleep. Not that it mattered. He shoved the desk toward Gator, ramming it against his chest. That got results.

  “What?” Nathaniel Gator said groggily, then straightened in his chair, wide-awake at the sight of Devin. “Who the hell are you and how did—?”

  “Let’s not waste time,” Devin said, tossing the bag of money on the desk. “That’s to pay off William Pace’s loan.” He took the note out of his pocket and ripped it up, then tossed the pieces on the desk, too. “You should have made your terms clear to him. Let me make mine clear to you. You will never send anyone to his home again. If you ever lay a hand on him again, I will kill you.”

  Having just been paid off, the lender didn’t seem inclined to take that threat seriously. “I only sent word that he needed to increase his payments. Two loans to the same bloke is risky, you know.”

  “That’s not all you did.”

  The man actually shrugged. “So my man beat him up a little. It’s his job to make sure the recipients of my largess pay me back in a timely manner.”