Desperate Times 2 Gun Control

by Nicholas Antinozzi

  “The hell you say,” growled Ken, and without another word began to run to the house.

  “If that isn’t Patty, who the heck is it?” Burt asked.

  “Whoever it is,” Julie said. “They’re getting closer.”

  “I’m going with Ken,” announced Doc. “Be careful; we don’t know who that is.”

  “I think we can handle one person in a canoe,” Burt said. “Go help Ken.”

  “I’ll go with you,” said Rita.

  “No,” said Doc. “You should stay here. Ken and I will take care of this.”

  There was an uncomfortable silence as Doc jogged away, and soon Rita was sobbing. “I’m not hysterical,” she moaned. “I’m really not.”

  They stood there for nearly five minutes, hands cupped over their eyes, before Julie finally recognized the paddler. “Oh my God,” she said. “That’s Bill.”

  “You’ve got to be shittin’ me,” exclaimed Burt. He stuck his hands on his wide hips and curled his lips back in an angry snarl.

  “Calm down,” said Julie. “You’re getting hysterical.”

  “Oh, that’s so funny,” Rita said, sarcastically.

  Burt began to laugh, and soon they were all laughing, even Rita. Jimmy laughed until his eyes watered and his stomach hurt. Of course he knew that Bill was going to be furious with both him and Julie. Still, he thought that would be small potatoes compared to how angry he was going to be with Burt. Bill didn’t have much in this world and had loved his Honda. Each time he was reminded of that, Jimmy was caught in another fit of laughter. Bill deserved it, he thought, especially after what he had done to both him and Julie. Bill had every right to be angry with them, but Jimmy wasn’t going to let him off the hook that easily, not because of what boiled down to a simple car accident.

  “He’s going to kill me,” mumbled Burt.

  “Not if I kill him first,” said Julie.

  “Don’t let me stop you,” Burt replied, backing away from the lake.

  Jimmy could now plainly see that it was Bill. He would stroke the paddle half a dozen strokes and glide to a stop. Thn he would repeat the process. Jimmy shook his head in embarrassment.

  “He doesn’t look happy,” said Rita.

  Julie stepped towards the water, balled her hands into fists, and struck a Dempsey-era boxer’s pose. “His day is about to get worse,” she hissed.

  Bill had obviously seen them, and his meandering canoe was pointed, more or less, in their direction. “You stole my car!” Bill bellowed across the water.

  “This is going to be ugly,” muttered Burt. “You know, technically, it wasn’t me who stole the car. You guys did that.”

  “Don’t worry, Burt,” Jimmy said. “Let Julie handle this.”

  “You stole my car!”

  “I hate confrontation,” said Rita. “I don’t care what Doc says, I’m going up to the house.”

  They all ignored Rita, and she slipped away, unnoticed. Bill was less than two hundred feet from shore and picking up speed. Julie marched down to the water’s edge and planted her fists on her hips superhero style. Bill’s tongue hung from the side of his mouth, clenched between his teeth. His eyes were wild with anger, and his red face was coated with sweat. He dug deep with his paddle and pushed with all his strength. The canoe hit the sand beach with a sharp, ripping sound. Bill used the paddle for support and practically leapt from the canoe. Jimmy had never seen Bill like this, and he’d known him for a long time.

  He came straight for Jimmy. “You left me out there, man!” he shouted in a froth of spit. “And then you stole my car!”

  Julie stepped in front of Bill. “And what about you?” she asked, furiously pointing at Bill with both hands. “You’re a goddamn liar!”

  Bill’s head looked as if a pinball was rattling around inside his brain. He pointed both of his fingers at Julie, mimicking her perfectly. “You’re a goddamn liar!”

  “Oh, shit,” grumbled Burt.

  “Let her handle it,” Jimmy repeated.

  “Why did you tell Jimmy that we had all decided to stay at Bailey’s?” Julie barked. “And why didn’t you tell me that Jimmy had come back here? I was worried sick about him, and you knew it!”

  “Me and Jimmy was just fine until you came along,” Bill spat, his face bright red with anger.

  Julie’s eyes blazed with unbridled fury. “You’re a sick man, Bill Huggins,” she growled. “I feel sorry for you.”

  “Where’s my goddamn car?”

  “You want your car? Follow me,” Julie replied, waving her arm at Bill.

  “Yeah, I want my damn car. I am so out of here, man.”

  Jimmy and Burt stood, shell-shocked, and watched the two of them stomp away with Bill staying a safe ten steps behind Julie. Jimmy scratched his head. “This isn’t good,” he said. “Do you think we should follow them?”

  “Hell, no,” replied Burt. “I think I’m going up to the house.”

  “You will stay right here. We’re both going to take our lumps.”

  Burt grunted and slowly nodded his head. “I wasn’t kidding, that was my first accident. That never would’ve happened if Ken hadn’t been standing in the road. You know that, right?”

  “I know,” Jimmy said, watching Julie and Bill as they stalked off down the gravel road. Julie’s hands were in the air as she screamed something at Bill. “Oh, crap,” he said. “This is so bad.”

  “Like I don’t know that? Give me a smoke.”

  They stood there and smoked. From their vantage point they could see a distant Bill as he stood at the corner. There was no mistaking his reaction as he put both of his hands on top of his head.

  “Son of a bitch,” muttered Burt. “I’m so sorry.”

  Jimmy watched Bill as he sprinted around the corner of the road, behind the woods, and out of sight. “It could have been any of us driving,” he said.

  “But I was showing off. That should have never happened.”

  Jimmy knew he should feel some pity for Burt, but he didn’t. Burt had been driving like a maniac and had put all of their lives in jeopardy. They stood there quietly for what seemed like a short eternity. Julie finally emerged with Bill two steps behind her.

  “Here it comes,” said Burt.

  “Yep.”

  They marched back, and their voices became clearer with every step. Bill was screaming about his wrecked car while Julie roared with indignation. Jimmy thought that he’d rather be anywhere on the planet right now, even locked inside a relocation camp. This was a volatile situation, and he’d seen enough of those recently—enough to last a lifetime. He and Burt exchanged a worried look and returned their attention to the road.

  “I don’t give two shits about that piece of crap!” shrieked Julie. “You’re a meddler, Bill Huggins, like some kind of comic book character. I can’t believe a word that comes out of your mouth!”

  “You smashed up my car!”

  “I wasn’t driving!”

  “Who was driving?”

  “Burt was!”

  “Oh, shit,” whispered Burt. “That’s right! I was driving your car, man. I’m so sorry, it was an accident.”

  Bill’s eyes grew huge, and he screamed something unintelligible. He suddenly began to jog towards them. At fifty feet away he began to scream again. He suddenly stopped and picked up a rock, and then to Jimmy’s astonishment hurled it at the men. The rock sailed harmlessly above their heads. Bill dug down and picked up another stone. That rock skipped two feet to Burt’s side and caused him to jump.

  “Knock it off!” Jimmy screamed. “Bill, grow up, will ya?”

  The words seemed to hit Bill like a freight train. His face seemed to crumple, and his hands began to tremble. To Jimmy, he looked like a young teen caught shoplifting. Bill let out a short wail and suddenly began to run back to the safety of his canoe.

  “That’s right, you asshole, get the hell out of here! Go back and crawl under your rock!”

  “Julie!” shouted Burt. “Enough of that s
hit!”

  But Jimmy knew Julie, and it was going to take a lot more than that to stop her once she had a full head of steam. “I hate you, Bill Huggins! Do you hear me? I hate your guts, and I never want to see you again!”

  Bill held his hands over his ears as he ran. Jimmy couldn’t remember ever seeing anything so pitiful. “That’s enough,” he said to Julie, taking her firmly by the arm. “Mission accomplished!”

  Julie turned in his grip, and he could see the anger drain from her face. Bill was now at the water, pushing the canoe out into the lake. He was bawling like a baby as he did so, and it caused his timing to be off as he tried to hop into the canoe. He was up to his knees when he tried heaving himself inside, but he slipped off in a great splash of water. The canoe continued out to sea, and Bill, soaking wet, charged after it in a mad, soggy scramble.

  “Will you help him, Jimmy?” pleaded Burt.

  Jimmy moved in that direction, but Bill had somehow managed to claw his way into the old aluminum canoe. “You can go to hell!” Bill bellowed at them as he began to stroke the paddle into the water. “I hate you, too!”

  They watched him paddle away in silence. Somehow Bill seemed to have found another gear. The canoe was a distant memory in only a couple of short minutes. Jimmy closed his eyes and said a prayer.

  “I shouldn’t have been so hard on him,” Julie said. “I’m sorry about that. He just makes me so mad. I really don’t hate him. I just don’t understand him.”

  Jimmy shook his head. He was angry with Julie. Bill may have fit every name she had called him, but he was still Jimmy’s friend. For all intents and purposes, she just shattered his fragile ego and had drawn a definite line in the sand, claiming him for herself. Jimmy didn’t think she had any right to do that or to tell him he wasn’t welcome back at Ken’s. That wasn’t her decision to make. Bill had accompanied Jimmy back to Bailey’s not knowing what they were up against. He had also saved all of their lives from the radical Christian Fundamentalists. He deserved better, despite all of his faults.

  Julie seemed to be reading his mind. “Oh, shit,” she said. “What did I just do?”

  “I think you made an enemy,” said Burt. He then turned and slowly walked back towards the house.

  “Oh, Jimmy,” Julie said, a tear falling down her cheek. “I was out of control. I should have never said those things to him. Oh, dear. You should have seen his face when he saw his car. He screamed like a little girl.”

  Jimmy shook his head and took her by the hand, happy that she could at least see the error of her ways. “Come on,” he said. “There’s nothing we can do about Bill right now. He’s just going to have to get over it.”

  Julie stood planted where she was, watching the canoe as it grew smaller. “Why does it seem like everyone is going crazy?”

  “I don’t know; maybe because we are going crazy.”

  They slowly walked back to the compound. Jimmy, eager to change the subject, tried to explain what had transpired in the kitchen. Patty had indeed thought he was Ken. Jimmy, embarrassed, had left out the part that she had made a confused pass at him.

  “That’s insane,” said Julie, tears streaming down her cheeks. “I was insane. That wasn’t me back there. You know me, Jimmy. I’m not like that.”

  Jimmy, suddenly struck by how bizarre the entire day had been, asked something he immediately regretted. “What if we all have Mad Cow Disease?”

  Julie seized onto that with both hands. “That would explain everything!” she cried out. “How long does it last?”

  Jimmy stared at his shuffling feet and flatly lied. “I don’t know,” he said.

  Chapter 11

  They walked through the gate, and Julie shoved it closed. Jimmy slid the lock into place. They had done it so many times that it had become routine. Jimmy wanted to tell Julie that his theory was just that—only a theory. She was adding up things out loud, narrowing it down to the canned meat in the cupboard. “We’re going to have to toss it all out,” she said, “or we’re never going to get better.”

  They walked up the hill and found Doc and Rita sitting in the sunlight at the picnic table. They were talking in hushed tones and stopped the moment they noticed the two of them. Jimmy and Julie exchanged a puzzled look.

  “Where’s Burt?” Jimmy asked.

  “Haven’t seen him,” Doc said, dismissively.

  Rita suddenly turned on Julie. “How could you have said those things to him? What if he forgot to tell you that Jimmy came back here? Have you ever thought about that?”

  Jimmy knew then that Rita had heard it all.

  “Jimmy thinks we all have Mad Cow Disease,” Julie said, ignoring Rita. “And I think he’s right.”

  Doc held his hands up and shook his head. “That’s not possible,” he said.

  “Oh, isn’t it?” asked Julie. “What the heck do you know? We sure as hell could have it, and it would certainly explain things around here.”

  “Listen to me, Julie. We don’t have Mad Cow Disease. That is inconceivable.”

  “And why is that?”

  “Because it would kill us all!”

  Julie hadn’t been expecting that. Jimmy could see it in her face; he grimaced. “I didn’t say that we had it,” he said. “All I did was ask, ‘What if we did?’”

  “I told you, and we’d all die in the throes of lunacy. Do you want to believe that’s going to happen?”

  Both Jimmy and Julie shook their heads. “But you can’t be sure that we don’t have the disease, can you, Doc?” Julie asked.

  “I certainly cannot.”

  “I’m not crazy,” said Jimmy. “I think Doc’s right.”

  “I’m not crazy, either,” said Rita.

  They all turned to stare at Rita for a second before Doc broke the silence. “I think Patty had a small stroke. That’s my personal opinion. Julie, you and Rita have been under a lot of pressure, and it’s only natural for that to throw you off center. I don’t think any of us are crazy. I do believe that some of us need to check their tempers, while others should keep their fears to themselves.”

  Jimmy agreed with Doc and nodded his head. Julie sighed and joined him. Rita studied a bug that was crawling across the table but never nodded or said anything.

  The following week was cooler as fall began to creep up on summer. Jimmy and Julie put aside their differences and were nearly inseparable. They shared themselves as if for the first time, and their love grew in leaps and bounds. Jimmy could feel it, and he felt somehow ashamed of himself for feeling so good. Patty showed little, if any, progress. Ken stood by her side and said precious little to anyone else. When he did talk, it was to relay some huge accomplishment of Patty’s. There were times when Jimmy wondered if he could hear himself; the miracles that he spoke of were so minuscule, it sounded like it would take her twenty years to make a complete recovery.

  Burt and Doc spent their days playing cards and doubling up on odd jobs. Rita took over in the kitchen, which nobody seemed to mind. She didn’t say much anymore, and Jimmy thought she looked like she’d aged a decade in a week’s time.

  One afternoon, ten days after the incident at the lake, Julie turned to Jimmy in his bed and she tenderly cupped his face in her hands. “Jimmy,” she whispered, “I want to get out of here. I can’t take it, anymore.”

  Jimmy groaned, and the moment was spoiled. Two days would pass before Julie brought it up again. They were down on the dock, fishing for crappies in the cool of a drizzling morning rain. “I want you to come along with me,” she said. “I want all of us to go, and I don’t want to come back. This isn’t my home.”

  “I can’t leave Ken and Patty,” Jimmy said, quietly. “You know that.”

  “What about me? I love you, Jimmy. I want to marry you.”

  “I want to marry you, too.”

  “So, what are we waiting for? They have a judge over there, and he can get us hitched. I want to spend the rest of my life with you—can’t you see that? I just can’t stay here. This p
lace is just too depressing. I feel like I’m suffocating.”

  Jimmy had known this was coming. He had known it from the minute she had agreed to accompany him back here. He had no idea what to say to her. He could no sooner lop off his own hands than he could leave Ken and Patty in their hour of need. He could see the boredom in Julie’s eyes, and it had been there from the second things returned to normal. “I can’t go with you, not right now,” he said. “If you really want to go, I’m not going to stop you.”

  Julie nodded, bravely. “I thought you would say that,” she said. “I’m sorry, Jimmy. I just can’t take it, anymore.”