by Mary Wine
You weren’t afraid to kiss Darius back…
Well, she admitted to being unsure. He was no virgin, nor was he the type of gentleman she’d practiced flirting with. For all the warnings she’d heard from matrons about the unsavory realities of what nongentlemen did, she couldn’t say she believed them. His kiss had excited her, and she liked the feeling. It was wild and unpredictable, but she discovered herself pleased to know he’d be watching her.
She lamented nothing.
***
“Perhaps you are too old for such an important task.”
Dr. Nerval drew in a sharp breath, but the man sitting in front of him only smiled at his outrage.
“Do not forget, Compatriot Silas, I am the one who discovered the girl.”
“And allowed her to slip through your fingers.”
The doctor stood, refusing to remain in the chair that sat alone in the middle of the room while Silas and two of his fellow Helikeians viewed him from a raised dais.
“A temporary situation. Her father still believes I am her salvation, and I will utilize his faith in me to bring the girl back into my custody.”
“See that you do,” Silas informed him. “Nothing else will satisfy us.”
Silas picked up a gavel and pounded it on the desk in front of him. The sound was like a pistol discharging in the room. The other Helikeian compatriots hid their faces in the shadows, never uttering a single word to help him identify them. The two doors opened, and he had no choice but to leave.
“Do you think he can do it?” one of the other men asked solemnly.
Silas laced his fingers together and sighed. “You should never have lost track of the mother, Compatriot Peyton. Your failing has now resulted in the Illuminists gaining yet another Pure Spirit who was supposed to be ours.” Silas turned to look at the man on his left. “The only reason we still tolerate you living is because you somehow manage to maintain your post among the Illuminists.”
“The girl would have been born inside their Order if I hadn’t succeeded in having her mother accused of treason. It wasn’t a simple task to plant enough evidence on her to convince them to proceed with charges. The grandmother has a great many friends. The end result was a victory. Mary Aston left the Order, thereby providing us with the opportunity to claim her children. Such was my mission. It is Dr. Nerval’s failing that allowed the girl to be discovered by the Illuminists.”
Silas flattened his hands on the tabletop. “You make excuses like a child. Your mission was to marry Galene Talbot so her bloodline would become Helikeian, and it would not have been necessary to claim her granddaughter.” He looked at the other man. “Things ran more precisely within our ranks when the weaklings were disposed of regularly.”
“Now they survive long enough to spawn, so we may watch our proud race become less perfect with each passing year,” Compatriot Heron agreed. “You have a mission to complete, Compatriot Peyton. Bring honor to your name, or expect every member of your line to suffer for your failing.”
***
“I can see your new novice is keeping you awake at night,” Lykos muttered the moment he arrived in Darius’s office.
“How is the little lady settling in after four weeks as a member of our Order?” he continued while shrugging out of his overcoat. He hung it on a coatrack along with his top hat. “Happy, is she?”
“Happiness isn’t a requirement.”
Lykos raised an eyebrow before sitting down in one of the chairs in front of Darius’s desk. “But sleep is.”
Darius handed over the report Lykos had come for, but his friend left it on the desk after one disinterested look. “I wonder if her eyes will be as darkly ringed as yours.”
“My lack of sleep has nothing to do with Miss Aston.”
“I should have come sooner. You’ve been stewing too long in your own musings and are beginning to believe them.”
Darius pushed the report closer to Lykos, but Lykos leaned toward him. “You’ve all the makings of a jilted bride, my friend. Do us both a favor and enjoy Miss Aston’s fascination with you.”
Lykos picked up the report and stood.
“Considering her past, it could well end in disaster,” Darius remarked.
Lykos shrugged into his overcoat and tucked the report into an inside pocket.
“Has she shown any signs of disloyalty?”
“No.” Darius stood. “She’s inquisitive, insatiable for more knowledge, and curious about the sections of the chambers off-limits to her.
“Hmmm…inquisitive, insatiable, and curious,” Lykos repeated with a smirk. “Some of my favorite qualities in females.” He reached for his top hat and settled it on his head with a smooth motion. “Stew too long, and I believe I will be happy to help her leave Puritan society behind completely.”
“The hell you will,” Darius growled.
Lykos abandoned his teasing demeanor. “She’s been here for four weeks. Keep locking yourself away in this office, and you’ll never notice when she finds someone else to befriend.”
Darius chuckled. “I notice everything about her.”
Lykos pressed his ear device. “Why do you think I came to fetch this report myself? Someone needed to make sure you heard reason.”
“I am doing the logical thing by ignoring her.”
The door was fully open now. “Perhaps as a Guardian you are, but I rather hoped I was talking to the man you’ve hidden beneath the duty.”
Lykos turned and left, the hem of his overcoat swaying slightly.
Darius didn’t allow the door to close but strode out into the hallway. He knew where Janette would be, had a full accounting of her every movement. But he stayed away from her, watching her when he knew she couldn’t see him. There were corridors that ran parallel with the ones the novices used, giving him the chance to observe her without her knowledge. He found her with ease, spotting her among the other novices. She’d abandoned her dress and moved easily in a pair of cycling pantaloons. There was no blush teasing her cheeks for how much of her legs were on display, only a sparkle in her eyes that told him she was enchanted with her studies.
He stared at her and cursed himself for a coward. Here, he could feast on the sight of her, all the while knowing he couldn’t lose the battle to reach out for her because the wall would stop him.
He’d lose the battle otherwise. That knowledge was hard and smoldering deep inside him. For the moment, his determination was strong enough to keep his feelings under control.
But it was a battle. One being fought between time and the strength of his fascination with Janette. His discipline wouldn’t last forever.
***
Janette collapsed into the plush chair in her chamber. She sighed as her feet rejoiced, but the rest of her body still throbbed and ached.
“It didn’t take you long for you to insist on joining an advanced class.”
Janette jumped. She landed on her feet with her arms up in a fighting position, but Darius only considered her with a slightly amused expression.
“These are my chambers.”
“Privacy is not the right of a novice,” he reminded her. “Ten weeks should have been long enough for you to read through the laws of our Order.”
“I’ve read them several times, Mr. Lawley.” She lowered her arms and resisted the urge to smooth back the hair glued to her forehead from class. Her Asian fighting uniform was rumpled and soaked with perspiration. No man had ever seen her in such a state, or at least not until she had become an Illuminist. But truthfully, she was more annoyed that it was Darius catching her so disheveled. The class itself she adored because it was teaching her to defend herself, an idea that gave her a great deal of satisfaction.
Besides, she didn’t need to be thinking about pleasing the man with her appearance. “I should have expected you to choose such an inappropriate time to exercise your right to inspect my chambers.”
He took a long step closer, looking far too comfortable for her. His emotions were neatl
y concealed behind an expression she couldn’t read, while she battled to keep her feelings from erupting.
“The entire point of novices being told they can expect inspections at any time is so that you understand any misconduct will be uncovered.”
Janette swallowed a sharp retort. “Do not despair, Mr. Lawley. I have noticed your bullyboys watching me with complete devotion.”
“Good.”
He walked past her, inspecting her chambers. The laws gave him the right, and she had seen the logic in such an action, but having the man in her personal space agitated her.
Liar…you’ve been pining for him…looking for him as often as he’s been watching you.
She walked into the small room that served as a kitchen. It was only a space of four feet but had everything she might need since she took all her meals in the hall like inhabitants of a castle had done centuries in the past. At least she had a private bedroom and wasn’t expected to sleep in the kitchen as her ancestors had.
She opened the water line and watched cool, clean water flow from the spout into a cup. Ten weeks still wasn’t enough time for her not to marvel at the clearness of the water. As crisp and clean as country water, and it smelled good too.
“It was best for me to avoid you, Janette.”
She jumped, not expecting him to follow her into the kitchen. The water sloshed onto the front of her Asian top before she turned to face him. Darius appeared pleased with his effect on her.
“I agree. Please let us continue to ignore each other.”
His expression darkened. “You understand my position now. A relationship between us would only complicate the action of performing my duty.”
She set the cup down. “Your assumption that I will turn traitor is quite insulting. My mother was not convicted.”
“Yet my suspicions are justified, considering your mother never faced the charges levied against her.” He moved closer. “Only a guilty person would run to avoid punishment.”
“Or one who felt trapped and helpless,” Janette offered. “I know a thing or two about seeing those around me who I considered family turning into my worst enemies.”
His expression softened. For a moment, he appeared caring and even tender. “Your mother had rights, Janette. We expect every member to answer accusations without turning cowardly.”
He believed her mother’s actions confirmed her guilt. His gaze was hard and unyielding on the point, but Janette couldn’t accept it. Her mother had educated her with a purpose in mind; she honestly felt it was so she could join the Order her very blood was a part of.
“All the more reason for us to continue to ignore each other.” Disappointment went through her, digging its claws in deep enough to make her ache.
Darius didn’t miss it either, but what surprised her was the similar look flickering in his dark eyes. It lasted only a brief moment before he masked it.
“It isn’t a sin I believe you carry simply because of your association with her,” he offered, but the note of kindness in his voice only pressed on the wound she’d felt since being ripped away from her mother by circumstances.
“Association? She is my mother. I love her.”
Darius shook his head and tapped the pin on his lapel. “To wear one of these, you will have to take an Oath of Allegiance.”
“I am aware of that.”
One of his dark eyebrows rose before he shook his head.
“I know you haven’t read the Oath yet, because you aren’t allowed to see it until you’ve studied for nine months. Believe me, Janette, this isn’t a time to assume you know more than you do. The Oath of Allegiance will force you to be firmly on one side or the other. Your mother is not a member. For the moment, she is on the other side of where you stand.”
She wanted to insist that he was wrong but knew otherwise. What was it about the man that needled her pride so much? All she wanted to do was stand up to him, no matter what. It wasn’t logical, but it was almost too much to control.
“Part of the Oath will entail your promising to stay away from members banished from the Order. Your grandmother received a reprimand for taking a message from your mother.”
He held up a hand when she opened her mouth to argue. “Your mother failed to present herself in front of a Marshal when she was summoned. The only contact she is allowed with any Illuminist member now is to face those charges.” His tone had softened, but it was deeply serious. “You will be expected to maintain a silent distance until she proves herself innocent. She must honor our laws or be cast out. The Helikeians would have sent an assassin after her if she were a member of their Order. We believe she has the right to be heard before being judged.”
He was warning her again. This time it cut deeply. Janette struggled to maintain her poise. Her father had always been fond of telling her that nothing in life was free, no clean bed nor bowl of morning porridge. Everyone earned their way by some means or other.
If she wanted to remain safely behind the solid doors of the Solitary Chamber, protected from her father and Dr. Nerval, she would have to earn the right.
“Then by all means, finish your duty and be gone before I am tempted to be friendly toward you.” She walked back into the main parlor room so he could pass her on his way to the door. Reaching forward, she tapped the section of wall where the Deep Earth Crystals were held and completed the circuit so the door opened. “I wouldn’t want you to hesitate when you come to kill me because we had engaged in pleasantries.”
He shut the door with a press on his ear device and stopped in front of her. “This is not a game, Janette. Turn against us, and I will have to silence you.” His expression remained deadly serious, sending a chill down her spine. She was certain of one thing: he was not a man given to flights of fantasy. He would judge the world around him on fact alone.
“Five other young women your age were taken into that clinic and lobotomized.”
She raised a hand to cover her mouth, but he wasn’t finished.
“You were raised in a secluded portion of town, Janette. I assure you, the guards at my doors knew very well they might have to defend their posts with their lives. A newly acquired Pure Spirit such as yourself would be worth killing for. Dr. Nerval has already destroyed the minds of five other women to find a Pure Spirit, and he’d have sent you to surgery if you’d failed his test.”
She’d be sitting in a cell, a ward of the state, if it had happened. She forced the horror down her throat.
“Make no mistake. Dr. Nerval is a Helikeian and a prime example of just how savage his kind are. If he fails to recover you, he will be executed, along with his entire bloodline.”
“That is barbaric,” she sputtered. “Just because the knowledge that this Order is founded on goes back to the ancient world doesn’t mean we should act like them.”
“Yet clinging to that knowledge when the rest of the world was collapsing into the Dark Ages is what formed us. Inside our Order, learning continued without the interference of the rise of religions or the sanction of monarchs. Honor is still the core of who we are.”
“Yes, and that is what I admire about you.” She spoke without thinking.
For a moment, she was caught in the grip of renewed desire. He was so close, the scent of his skin teased her senses. She found his features too attractive, his dark hair gaining her attention. His jawline was always perfectly clean, no hint of stubble, only the slim sideburns he kept to a minimum. A ripple of sensation moved across her skin, awakening longing. She wanted to touch him, to allow her fingers to glide along the border between smooth skin and whiskers.
“Go. Now that you’ve performed your duty.”
Before she said anything else foolish, before she responded to him again.
His eyes narrowed, making frustration nip at her. It wasn’t easy. She wanted him to stay, to kiss her again. She forced her desire down and made herself recall her rights.
“According to the laws, I have the right—”
“To se
nd me on my way once I have made my inspection,” Darius finished for her. His voice had lowered, becoming husky. “You also have the right to ask me to stay.”
And become her lover.
Of all the things she had learned in the last month, discovering the Illuminist attitude toward sexual activity had been the only thing that shocked her.
“I won’t be taking a man who doubts my integrity as my intimate companion, Mr. Lawley.”
She expected him to be frustrated by her rejection; instead, admiration appeared in his eyes. He reached out and stroked the surface of one cheek with the tips of two fingers.
Sensation shot through her, stunning her with just how intense it was. Despite his having touched her before, it was as if being apart had heightened her senses. Or maybe it was because she knew how much she’d enjoy his touch that her heart accelerated.
“Which is exactly why I wouldn’t have accepted the invitation. I am not just a Guardian. I am the head one here.”
So the man was testing her. Her temper threatened to boil over. “So your decisions concerning me must remain above reproach?”
He nodded, but she could see in his eyes that he didn’t care for her words.
Good, at least she wasn’t alone in her frustration.
“Kindly vacate my chambers, Guardian. If you’re satisfied, that is.”
At least she was becoming quite used to being tested. It made it easier to push her emotions down and lock them beneath the resolve she harbored for achieving her goals. She stared straight into his eyes now, able to aim steady confidence at him. Now frustration made its appearance in his eyes, but there was also something that looked very much like satisfaction.
“I am not satisfied, and neither are you, but I will leave.”
She closed the door behind the man, but the gears running the automatic workings of it didn’t allow her to slam it shut like she wanted to. The soft sound it made when at last it finished closing was far from satisfying.
Testing her.
That knowledge should have soothed her. Or at the very least given her more resolve to dismiss the man. Instead, she battled to keep her longing for him locked behind the logical reasons she’d spent too many nighttime hours assuring herself were valid.