Ink Enduring (Montgomery Ink #5)

by Carrie Ann Ryan

  Jake chuckled and stood up, his hands filthy but his thoughts even filthier. “We can go Ghost on my next piece. I’m behind on this one, but when I put a new block of clay on there? We can play around. Watching your hands on my…piece would be nice.”

  Maya rolled her eyes and slid her tongue ring over her lips. “Nice?”

  “I think I want to bend you both over Jake’s benches and fuck you until you scream,” Border said casually though his words were anything but casual.

  Jake opened his mouth to say something, but his alarm on his phone went off, forcing him to curse. “As much as I want to do all of that, right now, I can’t. That’s my alarm to head over to my brothers’ project site and help them out.”

  The tone kept ringing, and he looked down at his clay-covered hands. It used to be easier when he’d used an old alarm clock that he didn’t care if he got clay on, but he’d been lazy with his phone. Maya sighed and sauntered over to his cell to shut the alarm off.

  “Go shower and get ready,” she said. “I need to head over to the shop anyway, so no time for a quickie or even a nice blowjob.” She sounded so sad when she said it, Jake couldn’t help but smile.

  “When I get home?” he asked. He liked the sound of that word, home. Maya had been staying over at his house with him and Border every night since Border had come back with those cuts and bruises. Jake had felt safer that way, and hell, he just liked that the three of them were sharing a bed nightly. He wasn’t sure if it would always work like that, but for now, he would relish it. It was all he could do not to fully plan for the future with these two. That was too dangerous right now. Hell, he was afraid it would be too hazardous for a long time to come.

  Maya leaned forward and gripped his cock like she had Border’s a moment ago. “I think that can be arranged. But I want the whole Ghost treatment. Just saying.”

  He leaned down and took her mouth with his, her taste bursting on his tongue, all sweet and rich. “I can do that,” he murmured against her lips.

  “I think I’m bigger than you, you know,” Border said as he walked up. “I might be the one who has to be behind you.”

  Jake’s dick would permanently have zipper marks. “I like you behind me.” He leaned forward and kissed his lover before sighing as his second alarm went off. Apparently, past Jake knew future Jake a little too well. “I need to get clean and get going before my brothers kick my ass.”

  Maya’s eyes brightened as she shut the second alarm off. “Not too clean, I hope.”

  He kissed her again. “Never too clean around the pair of you.”

  “Well, there was that time in the shower with the three of us,” Border said with a smile. “We got pretty clean then.”

  Jake rolled his eyes as Maya snorted. “Yeah,” she agreed, “but then it took two of you to keep me up after my knees melted.”

  “My dick was in you at the time, so I don’t really think I can blame you,” Jake said with all seriousness.

  She snorted again, and he pulled away, knowing his third alarm wouldn’t give him enough time to shower. When she slid his phone into his pocket, he had to hold back a moan of his own. Damn spicy woman. Pure evil.

  “See you when I get home?” he asked.

  “I’ll be here,” Border said. “Got some paperwork to deal with.”

  “I might be late,” Maya said. She held up her hands when both men opened their mouths to speak. “But I won’t be alone in the shop. Sloane is working late with me on another client.”

  Jake frowned. “But what about driving home?”

  “I’ll be as safe as I can, and I won’t take back roads.” Maya pressed her lips together. “It’s the best I can do and still live my life.”

  Shadows passed over Border’s eyes, and Jake cursed. He knew the other man wanted to leave, or at least felt he had to, but there was no way Maya or Jake would allow that. They would just have to be careful. He met Maya’s gaze, and she nodded. They’d do their best.

  They had to.

  He quickly said goodbye once more and headed to the shower. By the time he got clean and made his way to the Gallagher site, he was just about late. Thankfully, his three-alarm system kept him ahead of the game. He knew that the way he worked bugged Owen to death, but his anal retentive brother just had to get over it. Not everyone lived their lives by spreadsheets and figures. As long as Jake was on time, and not late, he was fine. He might not always be early to things like Owen, but at least he took his brothers’ timetable into account.

  As he walked toward where the three of them stood, talking with their afternoon coffees in hand, it struck him again that he was the odd Gallagher on the outside looking in. He didn’t own a share in the company, though the three had asked him if he wanted in when they’d first begun—and a few times since. He’d never felt right in doing so. He only worked on some aspects of the projects, and usually at the end when they needed statement pieces or accurate historical replicas that he was good at, though it wasn’t his favorite thing to do. Graham, Owen, and Murphy had a system going, and it wasn’t something he would ever fully be a part of. Even after all this time, it still bugged him.

  Graham looked over his shoulder and spotted Jake before giving him a chin lift and turning back to the others. Jake sighed, knowing he should just get over himself. It wasn’t their fault that he felt like he stood between two worlds: the Gallaghers and the Montgomerys. His brothers had their own issues, but they were a tight-knit unit that worked together daily. He was only called in when they needed him. He might have dinners with them, might watch games with them, but he wasn’t truly a part of them in some aspects.

  He was the artist. The different one. He was the bisexual brother. The one currently living in a ménage. It wasn’t like they ever treated him differently, but they had a connection to each other the likes of which he would never share.

  Maybe that’s why he’d clung to Border as he had all those years ago, and why he’d made Maya his best friend even when he’d felt something different for her at the time. Now he had both Border and Maya in his life, and he was so damned scared it would all fall apart, and he’d be left alone once again that he wasn’t sure what he was doing.

  It didn’t matter in the end. He’d do what he had to in order to make sure they didn’t leave him and turn him into some emo pile of shit when things went to hell.

  He strolled up to his brothers, knowing if he didn’t hide what he felt about the way he was on the outside looking in, he’d hurt them. They were his family, his blood, and they didn’t deserve to feel like they’d done something wrong when they hadn’t. They had never once treated him differently for who he was, but since he felt it, it had to be real in some sense, right?

  Or maybe he was going fucking crazy since everything else in his life—other than his art—seemed to be up in the air.

  He would just have to deal with whatever he felt and know his brothers would always be there for him. Because there was no way he’d lose them along with the two people he truly loved when things went to shit.

  He ran a hand over his face. Hell, he needed to get out of his head.

  “What’s up, man?” Murphy asked as he nudged Jake’s shoulder. Owen handed up a cup of coffee, and Jake’s shoulders relaxed a bit. His brothers cared, even if he felt like the odd man out.

  “Just thinking, but ready to get to work.”

  Graham studied his face. “You know you can talk to us if you need to, right? Because I know there’s shit going on with you, and you’re not doing anything about it. Or if you are, you aren’t telling us. I don’t like that you keep yourself apart from us, Jake. We’re here. Don’t run from us. Okay?”

  Jake blinked, a little disturbed that Graham had nailed his thoughts right on the head, though he shouldn’t have been. His older brother had always had the uncanny ability to seek out underlying problems when it came to others, though he wasn’t very good at doing it for himself.

  “I’m fine,” he lied. “Just feeling a bit off-k
ilter, I guess.”

  Owen frowned. “Well, we’re here if you need us. I know you think you’re not part of the Gallaghers because you don’t work with us full-time, but you are. Okay? You’re one of us no matter what.”

  “What they said,” Murphy added. “You’re our brother, dipshit. So keep that frown off your face and let’s kick ass on this project.”

  A weight lifted off Jake’s chest, though he knew it wouldn’t be that easy every day. But hell, his brothers knew him inside and out, even when he was worrying about all the wrong things. He knew he’d focused on his place in his family rather than his place with Maya and Border because his place with his brothers was one thing that would never change. He was a Gallagher, even if he sometimes felt like he was different.

  As for Maya and Border…well, he didn’t know. He just prayed it wouldn’t fall apart in his hands like a bad turn on his table with a piece of clay.

  “If we’re done discussing our periods, will you guys tell me what’s going on with the site today?” Jake knew he was being as ass, but it was easier than showing them what their words meant to him.

  Murphy snorted. “I’ll have you know I don’t need to bleed every month to talk about my feelings. I’m an enlightened man.”

  Jake choked on his coffee as Owen rolled his eyes, and Graham shook his head in exasperation.

  “Whatever,” Jake said. “Let’s get to work, shall we?” His brothers nodded, and they started on the plans they needed from him. He fell into step with them, knowing that this would always be his family through thick and thin. He just hoped that he’d be able to expand it to include Maya and Border, as well.

  Because if he couldn’t rely on that in his future? Well, he wasn’t sure what he would do.

  Jake rolled his neck as he made his way into the café for a late lunch. He’d rather have gone to Taboo, the place next to Montgomery Ink, but he was too far away. Hailey knew his order even if he didn’t get the same thing every day. She knew her audience well, and he didn’t have the same comfort level at this random place near the job site. Though, in reality, he wasn’t sure that anywhere held the kind of ambiance that Taboo had. Hailey was a freaking genius and a magician.

  He ordered a sandwich and iced tea at the counter and went back to one of the empty booths to wait. Apparently, the waitress would bring his food to him. He was fine with that since his legs hurt like hell. He might be in shape, but his brothers worked freaking hard. It probably hadn’t helped that he’d been up most of the night fucking Maya while being fucked by Border. Between that and spending the entire morning bent over his worktable, his body wasn’t too happy with him at the moment.

  Jake rested his head against the back of the booth and was just about to close his eyes when movement in his periphery caught his attention. He froze, blinking.

  “Holly?” he asked, his voice a little rough. Hell. He hadn’t seen her since she’d dumped him, and while he’d felt like shit afterward, he’d been so focused on the new part of his life, he hadn’t set his mind on her much since Border had come back. That made him feel like a heel and a horrible boyfriend. No wonder she’d dumped his ass.

  Holly sat at a booth cattycorner to him so they pretty much faced one another with not a lot of room separating them. She gave him a small smile and played with the edge of her plate.

  “Hey, Jake.” She cleared her throat. “I didn’t realize you came to Hannah’s Eatery.”

  Jake looked around for the name of the place he’d come to and shrugged. “I’ve never been here before, but it’s closer to the Gallagher site than Taboo.” He sighed and got out of the booth, knowing he needed to not be an ass about seeing her. Sure, Denver was a huge city, but he’d met Holly at Taboo because it had been her favorite café. If she were here now, it was either because, like him, she was closer to this place, or she was avoiding the place she’d liked more.

  “It’s good to see you, Jake,” she said, and hell if she didn’t sound honest about it.

  He sank into the bench opposite her after he gestured and she nodded. “You, too, Holly.” He paused, feeling a bit awkward. “Were you working around here?”

  Holly snorted and shook her head. “No, Jake. I work at the same place I always have. But since it’s a Saturday, I figured I’d venture out for food and leave my little cave of lesson plans and grading.”

  He knew she loved her job, even if she made fun of it sometimes. After all, he did the same with his. “Why aren’t you at Taboo, then?” He knew he was being an ass, but he needed to make sure she knew that she wasn’t banished from her favorite places because they weren’t together anymore.

  She gave him a look that said she questioned his mental abilities but didn’t say as much. “Jake, seriously? That’s your place. It’s attached to Maya’s place. It’s okay that I needed to find a new café to eat in on Saturday afternoons.”

  The waitress came at that moment and slammed down his plate and tea before stomping away. He met Holly’s eyes.

  “Holly?”

  “What, Jake?” Holly asked, exasperation in her tone. He wasn’t used to the sound of it in her sweet voice. “You look happy, you know that? You look amazingly happy, and I know it’s Maya and Border.” She smiled. “Yeah, I know about that, and I say it’s about time with Maya. As for Border? I only just met him, but I felt the connection between the two of you. I want you happy, Jake, and you are. Or, at least you’re on the right path this time. I wasn’t for you, and I know that. It’s okay, Jake. I’ll find my happy.”

  Jake reached out and gripped her hand. She stiffened a bit before relaxing. “I want you to find your happy, too. I’m sorry I wasn’t it.”

  She shook her head and removed your hand. “Don’t be sorry that we’re not meant to be. That look in your eyes right now? The one that says you’re falling in love or already have with two people who make you you? That’s the look you never had with me, and I’m glad we never got too far down a path we couldn’t back away from without breaking each other.”

  “Holly,” he whispered.

  “I’ll be okay, Jake.” She paused. “Or maybe I am okay now, I don’t know. But you don’t have to worry about me. I promise.”

  “I’m always going to worry about you, Holly. We were friends, remember?”

  Holly smiled at him, and he couldn’t help but smile back. She always had one of those smiles. It was why he’d asked her out in the first place.

  “Be happy, Jake.” And with that, she slid out of the booth and reached to squeeze his shoulder. “And finish your lunch. You’re looking a bit peaked.”

  He laughed then and stood up to bring her into his arms. He tucked her close, knowing that he’d hurt her because she’d seen something in him he hadn’t been able to hide. She might be the strongest person he knew, but she was still as fragile as can be.

  She patted his back and moved away. “Be happy, Jake,” she repeated.

  “I will.” He paused. “And come back to Taboo, Holly. Don’t change everything because of what we were, or rather because of what we weren’t.”

  She studied his face. “I just might.”

  Jake watched her walk away and sighed, suddenly not that hungry anymore. He just wanted to go home and see his people, see the ones that Holly thought made him happy. He let out a breath and walked toward the door, leaving his uneaten sandwich alone in the booth. What a weird day.

  When his phone buzzed in his pocket, he was a little afraid to look at it to see whom it could be, considering the odd day already. The fact that it was a text from Maya made him smile.

  I’m on my way to my place. Client canceled and I need clothes.

  Jake smiled as he texted back. You don’t need clothes with me and Border around.

  Chafing, Jake. Chafing. I need pants at least. And maybe a top.

  Jake laughed as he got into his SUV. No underwear at least. You going to be there for a bit? Can I come by?

  Maya responded quickly. You’re always welcome here, Jake. And I may or
may not be wearing panties when you get here.

  Jake groaned. On my way. Don’t come without me.

  Bully.

  He smiled again and pulled out onto the road so he could make it to Maya’s. He hadn’t been there in a while since Maya had been spending so much time at his house. It was easier since the three of them could fit into his bed and space much easier than in Maya’s apartment. Plus, Border was living with him, making it two against one in terms of location.

  He blinked at that. He was living with another man, and Maya was well on her way to being there full-time, as well. How the hell had that happened? They honestly hadn’t talked about Border moving out to find his own place since that first night. The other man had sort of just fit in right away, and now Jake wasn’t sure what he’d do if Border wanted to leave. For all their talk of keeping things as casual as possible, they’d sure started off as serious as hell.

  Jake took a shaky breath, his hands tightening on the steering wheel. He didn’t think there would be any going back. Not now. If things went to hell…he’d break. He knew it. He couldn’t look at Maya as just his best friend anymore. He fucking loved her.

  And Border couldn’t leave him again. Jake couldn’t be left behind if Border found himself in too deep with his job and frankly, his emotions. There isn’t any going back, he repeated to himself. He loved Border just as much as he loved Maya. He might have done his damndest not to think those words before this, but he knew he couldn’t hide it any longer.

  He needed Maya and Border in his life for now and always.

  He just prayed they were on the same page as him.

  When he pulled into Maya’s parking lot and turned off his engine, he took a deep breath, knowing he couldn’t share what he was feeling right then. It wouldn’t be right to do it with Maya without Border there and vice versa. This was something he had to do with both of them. He wanted them both. Wanted a future with both Maya and Border. It would be complicated as all hell, but they’d work it out. They had to.