Anaya's Pride: A Reverse Harem Love Story (Beasts of Ironhaven Book 1)

by Chloe Cole

  "Lucian! Put me down, this instant," I hissed, slapping at his massive shoulders. Surely, I should hate being manhandled like this after yesterday. Surely, I should be horrified. But again, all I felt was heat.

  We moved a few yards across the room before he dumped me onto what felt like a massive bed without warning.

  "Arg!" I grunted as my bottom hit the mattress. “What exactly is this lesson that--"

  But he had me up and on all fours a second later, with his infernal hand wrapped in my hair again before I could complete that thought.

  "Do you imagine the king will suffer your insolence?" he demanded roughly. "Do you imagine he will accept the constant back-sass?"

  I could feel him positioning himself behind me and my heart stuttered in my chest as the fear that had been missing finally bloomed in my chest.

  Was this how it would happen? Day after day here with them, after kisses, caresses, and whispered words of praise, would the rules fly out the window? Would I lose my virginity in a fast, hard taking?

  I stayed perfectly still, trying to hear through the blood rushing to my ears. Had he unzipped his pants? Taken his massive girth out to slide deep inside me? It would hurt, of that I had no doubt. But through the tiny frisson of half-baked fear, there was also curiosity. Would it ease the ache that seemed to never end? This clawing desire for something...anything to happen and end the cycle of torture?

  For what seemed like endless minutes, we stayed that way. His hand fisted in my hair, the sound of our harsh breathing filling the room. And then I pulsed my hips backward until my ass brushed against him.

  His low grunt of response and fingers tightening in my hair only emboldened me as I pressed harder, wriggling until I could feel the length of him lined up with the seam of my sex.

  "You have no idea what you do to me, do you, woman?" he asked, his tone almost pained.

  I wet my lips, and let my eyes close. Let his gruff voice wash over me.

  I didn't want to think about my future or the king or yesterday in the woods, or even tomorrow. I didn't want to think at all.

  Being with Lucian just made me want to feel.

  I pushed every other thought from my mind and followed the instinct of my body, rubbing up against his thick length and letting out a little moan at the delicious friction it caused.

  "You're playing with fire, Anaya."

  His free hand closed over my hip, branding me with his heat as he pulled me even tighter against him.

  He released my hair and slid his fingers down my spine, pausing to flip my dress up around my waist.

  I felt totally exposed, even in the darkness, but I didn’t care. I wished he could see me. I wiggled my behind and his fingers closed over my underwear. A snap rent the silence and my skin stung lightly, but it took a long moment for me to sense the cool air on my bare nether-parts.

  I gasped, only to choke back a cry when he parted my slick sex with his fingers. My body nearly pitched forward as I bucked back against him with the intensity of the sensation.

  At first, it was almost too much. His fingers sliding through my wet heat, over and over, up and down. But then it wasn’t enough. I wanted more. The brush of his calloused fingertip against that nefarious bundle of nerves at the very top of my sex felt like the most delicious sensation I’d ever known…until he firmly slid one thick digit deep inside me.

  Stars exploded behind my eyelids and I dropped my head, closing my teeth over my forearm to stay quiet.

  “God, so fucking tight. So responsive…but we have to stop. That’s enough for today.” The declaration sounded like it was being dragged from his lips with pliers as he retracted his finger. “This was only supposed to show you that sexuality can be intense and hard and fast without being anything like what almost happened to you yesterday. We have to stop,” he said again, this time his words as much a command as a plea.

  But I couldn’t stop. Something was coming, something amazing, and I refused to let it out of my sight.

  I pressed back against him, reaching back to grip his wrist, to urge him on. His finger pressed deeper as he slid in a second to join it…filling me…stretching me.

  "Lucian. Oh, god!”

  He seemed to freeze, his whole body strung by a tight wire.

  "Say it again," he muttered through gritted teeth, sliding his fingers almost infinitesimally deeper, curling then to touch a place inside me that had me crying out. "Say my name,” he hissed.

  Anything, if he just would promise not to stop. To let me reach the proper end to the days of torture I'd endured. It was close. So close, shimmering just out of my reach…if he would just do it. Plunge that finger harder. Deeper.

  “Lucian, please!"

  When he finally gave in, I could feel it. Something snapping inside him as his body tensed behind me. I could hear it in the defeated groan that broke from his lips.

  “Ah, Anaya, you'll be the ruin of us all."

  But those words ceased to have meaning when he began thrusting in earnest. Deep, long, luscious slides, flesh dragging over aching flesh, time and time again. No stopping. No pulling back, just a steady build that had my arms and legs trembling.

  "S-something's happening," I murmured, as a wave began to rise inside me. I arched back against those clever fingers, suddenly in a race for what felt like my very life.

  He let out a low hiss and then he released my hair, slipping that hand around my waist, over the gentle curve of my belly and lower, between my thighs to press firmly against the bundle of aching nerves that lay there.

  Then, suddenly I was flying as the tension coalesced, freezing for one, unbearable moment before it broke apart, shattering into a million pieces and shattering me along with it.

  I lost control of my body completely, a scream dragging past my too-dry throat, my hips bucking and grinding, taking whatever Lucian was offering and more. My sex flexed and squeezed, clenching over his fingers in a primal rhythm that I could no more control than I could stop the stars from shining.

  Dimly, I could hear him behind me, murmuring low words of praise and encouragement. So different than any of the other words he'd ever uttered to me before. It felt like it went on forever and went by in a flash all at the same time.

  And then it was over. The world came crashing in all at once. The sounds of the shutters creaking. The chill of the howling wind seeping through the cracks and cooling my overheated flesh. The feel of Lucian pulling away from me as I realized with a start how wantonly I'd behaved. How I'd begged...

  “I’m sorry,” Lucian muttered as he pulled away, the bed creaking as he pushed himself to his feet.

  My stomach cramped as I shoved my skirt down and shuffled back into a sitting position, wishing I could stand but knowing my legs wouldn't hold me.

  “Why are you sorry? Did I...Did I do something wrong?" I asked, inexplicably on the verge of tears. It wasn't like he was my mate. He was my tutor. Why had I allowed him to get close enough to make me feel so good one moment to so unbelievably awful the next?

  That was something I had to remedy, and fast.

  But it was so hard when every cell in my body still tingled from his knowing touch.

  "You didn't know. You're-" He broke off with a snarl and raked a hand through his black hair. "I'm the one who did something wrong, Anaya. And it's not your fault, but the fact remains that there are potential consequences. I need to go speak with my brothers. You can rest here until we call for you."

  I nodded miserably. "Okay. I understand."

  But I didn't, I didn't understand at all. Didn't they want me prepared for the king's harem? I'd seen the pictures. Surely, what we'd done was no worse than the things I'd seen.

  He shifted himself behind his britches and winced, his nostrils flaring as he gazed down at me. "No matter what happens, I won't let anyone harm you. You believe that, don't you?"

  It made no sense that I would trust his words. We barely knew each other, but for some reason, I found my head bobbing like a marione
tte.

  "Yes."

  "Good. I'll have Cook send up some tea for you. Try to rest." He crossed the room for the door but I couldn't bring myself to watch him go. Instead, I closed my eyes, and, when I heard the latch snap shut behind him, I flopped back onto the pile of pillows behind me with a groan.

  "What did you do now, Anaya?" I murmured, throwing my arm over my eyes in despair. If only Iris were here. She would know how to fix this. She always knew the right thing to do or say.

  For the next while, I lay there, motionless, trying to pick apart each moment as it happened. Desperate to figure out where it had gone wrong. Soon enough, though, my brain stopped searching for what was wrong and began remembering what had felt so dang right. If that was even close to what mating was supposed to feel like, I could imagine why everyone was so keen to land themselves a mate. Could I expect that in the arms of the king?

  I cut that thought short, my stomach aching at the thought. I didn't want to feel the king's hands in my hair, or his fingers moving inside me. Gatlin? Yes. Connor or Michael? A thousand times yes. And Lucian? My nipples pebbled at the very thought of all that we’d done and all that we hadn’t.

  But King Sebastian?

  The thought left my body cold.

  And maybe that was the rub. But, surely, that wasn't a first for the Saint John brothers. Surely, their charges had fallen into puppy love with them before? Gatlin with his cocky smile. Connor with his mischievous laugh. Michael with his solemn sincerity. And intense Lucian sucking up the energy in every room he occupied.

  What girl would be immune to all that?

  I let my eyes drift shut and willed my muscles to relax.

  Until one of them came to get me and told me what the heck was going on, I had two options. Drive myself crazy or embrace the languid sense of bone-deep satisfaction that was sweeping through me.

  After days of feeling so tense, like a wire strung too tightly, this new sensation was a welcomed one and I found myself floating off into the place between sleep and wakefulness, my mind filled with thoughts of the Saint John brothers.

  Chapter 14

  I must’ve drifted off because, when I awoke, it was to find an untouched tray of tea and biscuits beside the bed and all four Saint John brothers standing around me in a semi-circle.

  "We'd like to talk with you," Gatlin said, the gentle concern in his eyes clearing away any remaining cobwebs of sleep cluttering my brain.

  I lifted a self-conscious hand to my mussed hair, and wondered if he knew. If it was obvious that, in the hours since he'd last seen me, I was changed.

  "All right,” I murmured as I crabbed backward to sit up against the headboard, careful not to upend the tray of treats beside me.

  "Not in here," Lucian ground out, his ebony eyes burning a hole through me as he jerked a thumb over his shoulder. "In the great room, if you please."

  He didn't wait for my reply, long strides carrying him from the room. His brothers filed out behind him and I was left staring after them, hoping like hell I wasn't going to walk in to find the gallows waiting for me.

  So this was bad. Like, actually bad, not Anaya overreacting bad. I could tell from their somber expressions. And now, my blood ran cold with dread.

  Don't think about it. Whatever you could think up is only going to make it worse, the rational side of my brain counseled. But the side that didn't know when to shut her trap kept going.

  What if they've decided that you're not fit for the king's harem anymore and want to send you away?

  What if they decided that you're ready to join the harem right now, and they send you away?

  But rational Anaya refused to think about why her biggest fears were all centered around having to leave the estate and her tutors.

  Desperate for answers, I rolled off the bed to my feet and snagged the mug of tea off the tray before padding barefoot across the room.

  I needed to focus on the positive and this was good. At least they planned on finally talking to me this time instead of keeping me in the dark and speaking in riddles.

  I made my way down the long hall and turned into the great room. All four brothers stood by the crackling fire, looking like a firing squad.

  Michael gestured to the massive brocade sofa in the center of the room.

  I did as he instructed and clutched the cup more tightly in my hand. "Look, I know I displeased Lucian somehow--"

  "Ah, woman, if you only knew," Lucian bit out with a harsh laugh. Gatlin's lips twitched and he slapped his brother's shoulder hard in a show of sympathy as Connor stepped forward.

  "You didn't do anything wrong, love." His hazel eyes sparkled by the firelight. "In fact, that's the root of the problem. You’re too right.” His lips kicked up into a pained smile. “And we like you quite a lot."

  I took a long pull from my cup as I fought the blush threatening to steal over my face again. If I was about to get the boot, the last thing I needed was to let them know how much hearing those words meant to me.

  "I, um, I like you all as well."

  "And there's the other rub," Gatlin said with a stiff nod. "Our job isn't to make you like us or vice versa. It's to make you aware of your body, teach you about pleasure in the abstract and, more importantly, how to please your king."

  The nuance of his words wasn't lost on me. My king? Sebastian Du Monde was king to us all. The brothers were prized members of his royal court with an important job, but at the end of the day, he was their boss, wasn't he? So why the distancing now?

  I tucked that question away to gnaw on later and considered the rest of his statement.

  "And you've all been doing that, don't you think?"

  I wasn't about to sit there and run down the specifics because my cheeks would likely get so hot that I would spontaneously combust, but I was pretty sure that the past days had been filled with body awareness and teaching and learning and pleasure...

  "Yes," Connor said with an uncharacteristically curt tip of his head. "At some point, though, we are realizing that we crossed the line into new territory. Uncharted territory. Now, decisions need to be made and, since your future is also at stake, we feel you should have a say in those decisions."

  I let that marinate for a second, seeping into my soul like a balm. It was a first, after all.

  Since I was a child, my path had been set for me. Dress this way, talk that way, complete the schooling my father thought necessary, no less, no more, and prepare to find a good husband. No one had ever asked me what I wanted. No one cared.

  And now, here I was, surrounded by four painfully gorgeous lions who wanted my input.

  It didn't even matter the topic, I was here for this.

  At the same time, I braced myself for the impact. I was too jaded to assume, or even hope, that any one of the outcomes I was offered would be ideal. Lionesses just didn't hold that type of value in our culture. But maybe one of them wouldn't be so bad?

  Gatlin made his way across the stone floor, taking a seat in the armchair beside me.

  "The king has many women, but he is a jealous man himself. I know that seems strange, given our positions," he said, his firm lips kicking up into a half-smile. "He has very specific tastes and expectations, and he wants the women in his bed to be well versed in those tastes and meet those expectations. He has no desire to teach or seduce. That's where we come in. But, while he is willing to allow us time with those selected for the harem, we are bound by very strict guidelines. Because he also wants the women in his harem to desire only him once they join the harem."

  How could Sebastian expect that when the Saint John brothers were so...so--I shot a glance at Michael, and let my gaze flicker from one brother to the next--so everything?

  I opened my mouth to say exactly that but snapped it shut when Lucian held up a silencing finger with a scowl.

  "The way he ensures that is by instructing us to take our lessons only so far. Each of us is allowed and encouraged to take our charge to the very brink. To prepare her, both
physically and mentally, for all manner of sexual interaction with the king. But under no circumstances are we supposed to allow that pleasure to culminate in a climax.”

  My mind instantly went back to Lucian’s bedroom and it all made sense.

  “Which is what happened when…”

  I looked around and they all nodded.

  “I’ve apologized to both you and my brothers, and they’ve said they forgive me,” Lucian said grimly.

  “If only because we share the same struggle with you, Anaya,” Gatlin added, a muscle in his lean jaw working. “So now we need to determine how to move forward. In order to do that, we need to give you our trust and ask for yours.”

  Lucian took my hand and met my gaze. “No matter what types of friendships you make, or who you meet, you must never tell what happened this night. Not to your sister, or the other harem girls or the servants. No one.”

  I nodded and wet my lips with the tip of my tongue.

  “Of course. I swear it.”

  “This is not for my sake, Anaya. I can handle whatever comes my way, but you? I’d never forgive myself if something happened to you because of what we’ve done.”

  “Yes. I understand. But…what of us now?” I looked around the room at each of them in turn.

  “It can never happen again,” Connor said, the regret in his eyes almost palpable.

  “I understand.”

  But I didn’t understand. I didn’t understand why men like Sebastian Du Monde could have a dozen lovers but I couldn’t have any.

  I didn’t understand why I had to be with someone I didn’t want, and not be with the someones I did want.

  The unfairness of it left a bitter taste in my mouth and a black mark on my heart.

  “I need to go now,” I whispered and tried to say more, but the words dissolved in my throat. I rose and then bolted for the door, knowing I was a moment from falling apart.

  Lucian’s voice echoed after me, but he felt bad enough as it stood and my impending tears would only make it worse.