Black Heart

by R. L. Mathewson

  Christ, he could still remember those carefree smiles that made it so damn difficult to stay angry at the boy. He’d been such a kind boy and an even kinder man. Tadgh would have made such a wonderful father and if it hadn’t been for him, he would have had that chance.

  He’d fucked up everything with one simple mistake, a stupid mistake and one that he’d spend eternity wishing like hell that he could fix, but he couldn’t. There was no going back, no fixing the mistake that had cost them everything, and no forgiving himself. Tadgh didn’t seem to have that problem.

  Nothing had ever hurt like the moment that he’d watched Tadgh die for the first time and then watched as the man appeared in his new cursed form as he was forced to watch his wife and unborn child die. God, the anguish and pain he’d seen in his brother’s eyes as he knelt by Macha’s side still tore at him when he allowed himself to remember that moment, but it had nothing on the moment that followed once Macha and baby’s souls were taken away.

  As Shayne had laid on the ground, barely able to breathe, never mind move from the injuries that he’d suffered, he’d been forced to watch as his brother’s world was destroyed and his heart was shattered. When Tadgh had finally been able to look away from the body of his young wife and looked at him, he’d seen pain, so much goddamn pain, but he’d also seen forgiveness in his brother’s eyes.

  Tadgh had stayed with them all as they’d been forced to lie there feeling useless and helpless as the reminders of their failure had laid only a few feet away. By the third day they hadn’t been able to take the reminder of their failure any longer. They’d dragged their bodies, broken and bloodied over to where Tadgh and Macha’s bodies laid. For the rest of the day and night they’d slowly dug a hole and buried the bodies while Tadgh stood over them.

  He never said a word while they worked, not even when they’d managed to drag Macha’s body into the hole and started to push dirt into the hole to cover her. He simply stood there, standing guard over them while they did what had to be done. Shayne wasn’t sure how he’d handled it. He knew that he wouldn’t have been able to cope with watching his own funeral. The two times that he’d died he hadn’t stuck around to watch, but Tadgh always watched.

  They’d told him that he wouldn’t be able to talk to or touch Marty once he died and that much was true. If she was still alive after he died, he’d be pulled out right away, but the moment that her time was up, he would start to feel the pull to return to her and each and every time he gave in without a second of hesitation. Tadgh always stood by Macha’s side as she drew her last breath. Then he would stay with her body until she was buried.

  Tadgh was a much better man than he was, but he’d always known that. While Tadgh couldn’t do enough to make things right for his soul mate, Shayne couldn’t give a fuck about his own. When he felt the pull of her rebirth he ignored it. He’d ignored the pull twenty-five years ago and he fully planned on ignoring the pull of her death whenever that happened just as he always had.

  She lived close by, but not close enough that he’d ever had to see her while he’d been protecting Tristan, which was a blessing. He didn’t want to see her, didn’t want to know what she looked like, what kind of life she had, if she was married, had children, or was living a miserable, pain filled existence. She wasn’t his problem or his responsibility, Tadgh was.

  His brother’s time was almost at an end and he needed to be there for him. No matter how painful his death would be, realizing that he was once again separated from Macha and their child was always excruciating for Tadgh. It would be even more painful this time, because this would be the last time he would ever see her.

  Shayne had seen it in Tristan’s eyes last night as the situation was explained to him. It hadn’t surprised him how fast Tristan had come to realize what the plan meant and accepted it. He’d always been like that, putting the needs and safety of his loved ones first. Every time Macha lost Tadgh it became increasingly harder to deal with and this time would be no different.

  He’d hoped that the plan would have saved Marty and the baby from the curse, but none of them had had the balls to go through with it and now they were going to suffer. He’d give her a week, four at the most before her heart gave out and she followed after Tristan.

  If he thought it would make a difference, he would just reach down and pull Tadgh’s soul out now, but it wouldn’t change anything. The curse was already activated and now it was time to go through the motions. Besides, Marty would want to say goodbye to him. It would be painful to watch, but they would deal with it and the aftermath.

  Hell, he was not looking forward to this. He did not want to watch as Marty’s heart broke. He didn’t want to watch as his brother once again lost the only happiness that he’d ever known in this lifetime and he sure as hell didn’t want to see the anguish in his brother’s eyes as Marty took her last breath.

  But, he would.

  He would do whatever his brother needed. He owed him that much at least.

  “Shit! Dad, he’s seizing!” Denny said, trying not to panic as he worked alongside his father to save Tristan’s life.

  Shayne was thankful that this family came into Tristan’s life. They’d taken him in, accepted him and loved him and Shayne had no doubt that if they had learned of Tristan’s curse that they would have been there for him as well. They’d made life for Tristan tolerable and Shayne would make sure that when their time came that he was there to help them to the other side. It was the least that he could do for them.

  “Park the fucking truck!” Tom yelled at the EMT behind the wheel, losing his cool for the first time since Shayne had come into the picture.

  Shayne knew that tone and look well. The man knew that he was about to lose a child and that there was nothing on this earth that he could do to stop it, but that didn’t mean that he was going to sit on his ass and give up. No, not this man.

  As the ambulance was put in park, Shayne watched as Tom worked to save his youngest son’s life. He kept working as the backdoors to the ambulance were opened and the stretcher was pulled out. He didn’t stop working even as the stretcher was moved quickly into the hospital, down the hall and through the emergency room doors. He was still working on his son twenty minutes later when Tristan’s stretcher was rushed through the restricted double doors of the surgical ward and then he stood there, looking helpless as he silently said goodbye.

  Chapter 38

  “Wait for me!” he yelled excitedly, grabbing the wobbly stick that he’d found just that morning and had decided would be his spear.

  “Go on back to ma’, lad,” Liam said, barely sparing him a glance as he gestured for him to do as he was told.

  Undeterred, he pumped his legs faster until he thought they’d fall off, but he didn’t let that stop him. He was ready to fight with his brothers and he needed to tell them so.

  “Pleeeaaassssssseeeeeeeeeeeeee!” he begged unashamed as he dropped his mighty spear and dove for his oldest brother’s legs when he was close enough.

  As soon as he had his small arms wrapped around Liam’s thick leg, he promptly followed up his attack by wrapping his legs around his brother’s calf and held on tightly, prepared to hold his brother captive forever if that’s what it took.

  He really hoped that it didn’t come down to that, because his doggie was expecting puppies any day now and he really wanted to play with them. That would be impossible to do if he had to keep doing this, but do it he would if that’s what it took. He was a man now and it was about time that his brothers realized that.

  Instead of yelling at him or hitting him like most of the men around their land would have done, Liam sighed heavily as he reached down and gently grabbed him by the arms and plucked him off. Tadgh tried to hold on tightly, but being only three, it was kind of difficult to put up much of a fight against his brother who was already as large as a full-grown man.

  “Didn’t we talk about this, lad?” Liam asked as he shifted Tadgh in his arms so that he could place his
arm over Liam’s shoulder and look his brother in the eye like a man.

  “Aye, but that was before,” Tadgh informed him.

  “Before what, lad?” Finn asked as he reached over and ruffled Tadgh’s hair.

  “Before I found my spear!”

  “I see,” Liam murmured as his lips twitched.

  “Ye mean this stick?” Quinn asked, stepping around them so that he could show Liam his spear.

  “That’s it!” Tadgh said proudly as Liam reached out and took the stick from Quinn.

  Liam pressed a kiss against his brow before he set him down on his feet and handed him back his spear. “What’s this about, lad?” Liam asked as he took a knee in front of him.

  “I wanna go with you and fight,” he said, not quite able to meet his brother’s eyes as he lied.

  “Ye hate fighting,” Liam pointed out as he patiently waited for Tadgh to tell him the truth.

  “That’s not true,” Tadgh mumbled as he looked up and met his brother’s gaze. “I like fighting. It’s fun, but I don’t like hurting anyone.”

  “Aye.” Liam nodded in agreement, because he understood how he felt. “And ye know that where we’re going we might have to hurt someone so I don’t think that’s the real reason that ye want to go.”

  Tadgh shrugged his tiny shoulders. “It’s not.”

  “Then what’s the reason?”

  Tadgh felt his chin quiver and tried to stop it before it gave him away, but he couldn’t. “I’m going to miss ye,” he shamefully admitted as he hurried to wipe away the tears on the back of his dirty arm before his brothers could see them.

  With a kind smile, Liam gently wiped away his tears. “And we’ll miss ye, lad, but we have to go.”

  “Do ye promise to come back for me?”

  “Always, lad, always.”

  *-*-*-*

  “Ye shouldn’t have talked back to me Da’,” Macha said in way of greeting as she finished crawling in beneath the tent’s flaps.

  “Aye, I’ll try to remember that the next time he’s pulling ye through the camp by ye hair,” Tadgh said dryly, shifting slightly on his sleeping fur and immediately wishing that he hadn’t when the small action caused agonizing pain to shoot through the slices on his back.

  “I had it handled,” Macha argued, opening her small satchel. “Besides,” she rushed to continue before he could call her on her lie, “I don’t remember asking ye for yer help.”

  He chuckled. He couldn’t help it. “Ye never have to ask fer it, mo shonuachar.”

  “Ye shouldn’t be calling me that. If me father hears-“

  “Then he’ll know that much sooner that ye belong with me,” Tadgh said firmly, loving the way that she nibbled on her bottom lip as she tried to hide a pleased smile from him.

  She didn’t say anything else while she laid out her herbs and cleaning cloths and he didn’t care. He was more than happy to lie there and watch her. She was his heart, his soul and he’d known that since the moment that he’d laid eyes on her when they were nothing more than children.

  “Ye need to stop pushing me father,” she said, sounding sad as she set to work to clean his cuts.

  “Then he needs to keep his hands off ye, lass,” Tadgh said, trying not to cringe as the herbs stung him.

  “He could have killed ye when ye threatened to kill him if he ever touched me again.”

  “It was a promise, lass, and believe me, if I ever see him hurt ye like that again I will kill him,” he swore, meaning every word, because he would kill the bastard. He’d do whatever it took to keep her safe.

  *-*-*-*

  “Please,” Macha said, panting heavily as she shifted beneath him in an attempt to tempt him to take her.

  “Please what, mo shonuachar?” he asked, teasing her with the head of his cock and loving the way she growled in frustration as he pulled away when she tried to roll her hips and take the choice away from him.

  “Don’t make me kill ye,” she growled, making him chuckle as he returned his cock back to her core.

  “Who knew that my wife was such a violent little thing,” he teased her as he leaned down and stole a kiss.

  “Ye did! Now take me before I’m forced to kill ye!” she snapped, rolling her hips up and this time he let her catch his cock.

  “We wouldn’t want that now, would we?” he groaned as he slid inside her hot sheath, amazed at how wet she could get with a few simple touches and kisses.

  Knowing that they didn’t have much time and that they needed to be quiet, he leaned down and took her mouth as he picked up his pace. He swallowed her moans as she did the same for his groans, both aware that any noise could draw the wrong kind of attention and cost them their lives. They shouldn’t be doing this, but he couldn’t help himself.

  She was everything to him and he needed to be with her and touch her. He hated that they were forced to sneak around, but until his service to his king was over or he figured out another way to get her out of her marital contract, this was the only way that they could be together. One day the king would pay for forcing him to sneak around with his wife like she was one of the whores that followed after their camp.

  That day couldn’t come fast enough for him.

  *-*-*-*

  “I can’t ask ye to do this!”

  “Ye don’t have to, lad,” Liam said unconcerned as he grabbed his sword and headed for the door of their small hut.

  The rest of his brothers grabbed their swords and satchels without a word and followed after Liam, but this wasn’t over. Tadgh grabbed his own sword and the satchel that held his and Macha’s things and headed after his brothers.

  “I’ll be right back,” he told her, hoping that for once she’d do as she was asked and wait here for him, but she didn’t and probably never would.

  “Ye know that yer not going to be able to talk them out of this,” she said as she caught up to him.

  “Aye, I know,” he bit out, taking her hand into his. “Stubborn bastards.”

  She chuckled as they hurried to catch up to his brothers who were already a good distance ahead of them.

  “They’re gonna get themselves killed!”

  *-*-*-*

  “Get yer hands off her!”

  “Make a choice!” the bastard said, giving Macha’s hair a violent twist that had her crying out. “Yer life or hers?”

  “Mine!” he shouted without hesitation.

  “So be it,” the king snarled as he shoved his daughter aside, pulled out his sword and swiftly slid it through Tadgh’s stomach, his men tightened their hold on Tadgh as he calmly accepted his fate. He’d do anything to keep her safe.

  “Ye bastard!” Shayne roared. “I’ll kill ye!”

  “Yer dead! Dead!” Liam shouted as the rest of his brothers fought and screamed, desperate to get to him and kill every man in sight, but Tadgh could barely hear them over his wife’s cries. She was in pain, so much pain and there’s nothing that he could do to stop it. He only prayed the baby waited just a little while longer until his brothers could get free and protect it.

  Clenching his jaw tightly, he forced himself not to cry out in pain as the king slowly, so goddamn slowly, pulled the sword out, making sure that Tadgh felt every ounce of pain. He wouldn’t make a sound of pain, too afraid that he’d use up the last of his energy when he needed to save it to beg for his wife and brothers to be spared.

  He could accept his fate as long as Macha was left unharmed, able to raise their child and that his brothers could be there to protect them. It was the only thing that kept him from fighting back and taking as many of the king’s men with him as he could. The only thing that he wanted above vengeance was the knowledge that his family would survive this.

  “Do ye truly believe that she’s yer soul mate?” the king asked tauntingly as he gestured for a guard to grab Macha when she tried to go to him.

  “Aye,” he admitted, knowing that there was no point in lying and fearing what the king would do to Macha if he tried.

>   “I see,” the King said solemnly, pulling out his short sword and pointing it towards Tadgh’s chest, probably expecting him to beg for his life, but he wouldn’t. This was the bargain for his family’s lives and he would gladly pay it for them.

  “Then where yer soul goes, shouldn’t hers follow?”

  It took a few seconds for the King’s words to sink in and by the time they did, it was too late. The King grabbed his own daughter by the hair and thrust the small sword into the right side of her chest, a killing wound. It was a wound that he’d inflicted hundreds of times into his enemies’ chests. It was designed to cause a slow painful death with no hope of recovery.

  “Ye bastard!”

  Keeping his eyes locked on his wife as she fell helplessly to the ground, he grabbed the sword at his throat, barely noticing or caring as the blade sliced through his fingers and shoved it away as he grabbed the wrist that held it and with a well practiced move, snapped it. He took the sword, turned it and thrust it back, killing the man before he could react. He quickly killed the man to his left as he pushed up on his trembling legs and went after the bastard that he should have killed a long time ago.

  He was barely aware of the commotion going on to his left or the screams of agony as he moved towards his prey. Before he could get within striking distance, the coward grabbed Macha by her hair, tilted her hair back, exposing her throat to the sharp blade of a dagger.

  “Not another step,” the king warned.

  “Ye won’t be leaving this field alive,” Shayne promised hoarsely as he stepped up beside him.

  “Yer life is mine for the taking,” Liam swore, stepping up to his left and claiming the right to kill the King. Tadgh didn’t waste his energy arguing, not when the only thing that mattered was that the king died this night.

  “Tadgh,” Macha said, sobbing as she pressed one hand to her wound and the other over the baby that she would never hold.

  “Drop the knife,” Finn said coldly, coming up behind the King while Fergus, Aidan and Quinn disposed of the men protecting the King’s back.