The Lonoki Solution

by Sharon L Reddy

  Professors began to depart one or two at a time. Dane sighed in relief. He'd begun to think he'd be there through dinner and possibly through the night. It was actually a bit past dinner time, when the last professor left. The six accreditation board members and the director pushed back their chairs and smiled. Dane smiled and waited. He expected an explanation of why the task had been so difficult. The university director gave him one.

  "Some of the reason this took so long was the sheer disbelief of our colleagues in other parts of the world, whose acceptance of the recommendations was necessary, so that the university didn't lose its planetary accreditation. Some was due to the fact calling some of them in the middle of the night was a sure way to get a flat refusal to listen to anything. And some of it was due to you."

  "What?"

  "Kiev Dane, it was rather simple to evaluate the work of Yan and Taral as fulfillment of their advanced ranking requirement for two rankings each in related fields. Your work in six unrelated fields was not. Each professor had a limited time to evaluate your depth of knowledge in his or her particular field, but all are quite satisfied they have done so. You set the record for fixing a very deliberate kink in the registration program. Another program now has a kink for an exceptional student to find and correct. Your dissertation in sociology sent professors running for statistical data. They didn't doubt you are correct. Your depth of knowledge of music, art, history, mathematics and physics were all very carefully evaluated."

  "I don't think I understand what you're telling me."

  "You were right, Kiev Dane. It is foolish for you to spend two years in study you don't need. Your remaining requirements are music performance and physical education. Yan and Taral require only physical education. Oh, and you're getting eleven rankings when you complete them. That was less difficult than refereeing the argument over which department was going to award them."

  Dane giggled. He knew it probably sounded silly, but he couldn't help it. He thanked the director and accreditation board and said he was sure his master would be quite pleased and he was looking forward to hearing her giggle. He was still having bursts of giggles when he parked his car and walked into the house. He worked to get 'dignified' and managed it, until he opened his mouth to tell Kiev the results of the day. What came out was a giggle and he just felt for a chair, sat down and giggled.

  "Kiev, I don't think those sound like they're going to end soon."

  "Neither do I, Yan. Let's see if we can figure out why. Dane, did you get Yan and Taral out of their university classes?"

  "Most."

  "Everything but physical education?"

  "Yes."

  "But that's not why you're giggling?"

  "I think that giggle was your answer, Kiev."

  "So do I, Kano. Let's try some more questions. You got more than you expected?"

  "Yes."

  "He got enough to make him giggle, Kiev. It was definitely more than he expected. He just doesn't giggle much. He laughs, but giggle is very rare."

  "What do you think our chances are of finding out what happened this evening, Yan?"

  "I think we might get most of the outcome, but I've got a feeling the story is going to come out between fits of giggles over several days."

  "Director decided. Didn't tell. Me too. Why long. Giggles. Music performance. Physical. Education. All left. Eleven!"

  "Translation, Yan?"

  "I think word, giggle, word, giggle and so on, is they decided he was probably wasting his time too and set it up to evaluate him and find out without telling him."

  "Even danced."

  "Oh, I will get the whole story. "

  "Did anyone besides me notice an unassociated number stuck on the end of the previous burst of words between giggles?"

  "I noticed, Taral. Dane, eleven what?"

  "Rankings."

  "University rankings?"

  "Advanced."

  "You only applied for six."

  "Yes. They decided. Better. Not argue. Who gives. So eleven."

  Kiev began to giggle and sat down on a chair. Yan abruptly sat in the floor and giggled. Taral sank slowly, giggling all the way down. Kano told Mal he thought someone should call at least some of the other members of the family and let them know Dane had been successful. Mal burst into laughter and pointed at him. Kano almost made it. He didn't start laughing, until Tarun answered the comm.

  Tarun watched him sink out of the camera range, listened to blended giggles and laughter, grinned and called Iliev and Jarun on conference. He said it would probably be awhile before they found out what had happened, but he was quite sure there weren't any problems. Iliev and Jarun listened a moment and agreed. Jarun didn't switch off. He put the giggles and laughter across the house address system. Four babies under two years old liked the nice 'music' and went soundly to sleep.

  Chapter Seven

  Iliev bought a trainer. His name was Kola. He was in his late fifties and the master he had loved had been killed in an accident when he was in his twenties. He had two children. One of them, his daughter, was in Jarun's household. He loved children and had taught many.

  He thoroughly surprised Iliev when he asked her to enroll him at the university, but she was quite pleased with his reasons. He needed to learn how they were teaching kindit to assure he taught it correctly and he wanted a great deal more knowledge about teaching small children organized play and treating them for the types of injuries they could sustain in that play.

  Two units after she brought him home, he was in Jarun's apartments playing with babies and Jarun's girls were working on getting acquainted. He was a very attractive man. His daughter, Claya, was carrying the chef's first children and the two men became instant friends, while studying books on the proper diet for pregnant women, athletes and infants.

  Kiev and her five liked Kola. He told them he never raised his voice with a child, but warned he yelled at adults and taught lessons in a way they would not forget, even if that meant they were stiff and sore for ten days.

  He 'looked them over,' told Kiev she was on the training schedule and ordered them all weight belts and the proper athletic supports, shoes, and clothing for each activity before he left her apartments the first time. Dane noted he'd never expected to be fitted for something in quite that way and Kiev giggled and said she'd been about as surprised to have her breasts measured and the muscles around them prodded as he had been to have his testicles measured. They were all pleased Kola had said they were in good general condition and didn't require a great deal of work to get in shape before they started real physical training.

  Dane drove them to the university for their first day of class and he, Yan and Taral all worked to keep straight faces when the weightlifting instructor wanted to know why Kola was in the class, because he obviously didn't need it. Kola told her he was there because she wouldn't yell at the three he'd be working with to get them through about two years of physical education in a quarter and he would. Then he grinned and told her he needed to know her method of instruction, so he could assure the work he did with them wasn't counter to hers. By the end of the first class, she was using him as an assistant.

  Since the three were not required to take large numbers of academic courses, their schedules had been 'packed' with the physical education courses they did need. There were actually only four, but that packed Dane's schedule. He had music to study, as well. He'd also discovered he had a fear of water, when they had their first swimming class, and that was going to take extra work. He didn't know Kola and the swimming instructor were both pleased with his reaction to discovering the fear. It infuriated him. It wouldn't take him long to get over it.

  The first kindit class was an explanation of the philosophy and the instructor made no pretense about the fact it had been "adopted" from human martial arts disciplines. Kola was quite interested and explained that he had stopped teaching kindit many years before because there had been none.

  The instructor loaded him with
material to study and changed his course level. He was an advanced student and would be marked on his assistance in helping him develop the philosophy, which would be incorporated into the course and serve as a model for all such university courses on the planet and, hopefully, all teaching of kindit, in the near future. Kola admitted he was extremely pleased with the idea, but hadn't exactly planned on spending long hours of study on the way home. The next day Dane and Yan both drove to the university. Dane and Kola would both be in class long after Yan and Taral were finished, Dane practicing three instruments with instructors present and Kola working with the kindit instructor on the incorporation of philosophy in the course.

  They dropped into a routine. Mornings were university classes for four. Afternoons, Dane and Kola were at the university and Yan and Taral at the company research lab. Evenings were workouts for six with Kola instructing. On their 'days off,' all helped with the construction of the sports and recreation complex. Kiev handed much of her routine company work to others and put in a great deal more time on the construction project. She also located a dance instructor who would teach her human 'social' dancing.

  The desired instruction in the human language was planned, but not until the very busy quarter of university study was complete. The human ambassador was quite pleased with both the idea and the timing. She explained that the best way was at least forty days of intense instruction with all participants using no other language to communicate during that period, and it would take time to arrange the embassy schedule so the person best qualified to teach the course was free for that period. She also told Iliev that twelve was about the limit on class size and she thought one of those should be a person who would be willing to do further study of it with the intention of teaching it. Tarun sighed and bought the slave Iliev chose for that job.

  The woman proved to be a very nice addition to his household and was quite excited about learning the human language, then going back to the embassy for further instruction and teaching it to others after she had. Wren Taylo laughed when she began trailing him around and asking the human names for everything she saw. He told Tarun she wasn't a problem because she had a tendency to hand him, or others, the tool needed before it was requested, then ask the human name for it.

  The six began to get into superb physical condition. As soon as the pool was done, Kano started learning to swim. Kola was rather busy, but one of Jarun's girls worked with him on basics and he began to catch up with the others. He had no fear of water and really liked swimming.

  Dane had gotten over his fear when he began to really be able to swim and had started the practice of a before-breakfast swim with anyone he could "drag along," as soon as the pool was completed, usually Yan. Yan noted "drag along" sometimes meant walking in his sleep and an abrupt awakening when Dane pushed him in the pool.

  Kola loved the philosophy he was studying and the kindit instructor requested, and got, three students to assist him in writing an instructor's guide for use in the university system and by any others who wished it. Kola requested a trader be found who would bring more reference materials and to be one of the students in the language course, so he could study them in the original form and not a translation. He was added to the list. Since Tarun and Jarun had both requested places as well, there were only two openings left. Those were filled by two of the students who were aiding Kola as soon as he mentioned the course.

  Mava, the female who would learn to teach it, had about four classes-worth of students lined up, before the day Kola mentioned it was over. Several were from Jarun's household and a few were from Tarun's and Iliev's, but most were university professors and students, including the kindit instructor. Tarun laughed and added cookbooks to the list the trader he'd contacted was going to locate for Kola. The chef was right about human agricultural products becoming available when ships with the new drive were built.

  "Tarun, do you want a 'rumor' the lonoki made a discovery to spread?"

  "No, I have a suspicion that, if humans learn there's another solution to the equations they discovered later and put to use faster, they may get ships into production before I do."

  "That's quite true. You'd better have a talk with the human ambassador. She'll consider it news of import to send home, and it's not exactly a secret on the planet."

  "Yi! Thank you. Tarun signoff. Comm connect to the human embassy in Upper Trade River City."

  "Human embassy."

  "Ambassador Slezak, please. Tarun of Evrun Ship Builders calling."

  "I'll connect you."

  "Hello, Tarun."

  "Good day, Ambassador. I'm calling to ask a favor for my world, one we need near desperately."

  "I will most certainly try to help."

  "I ask you not report our discovery of a new solution to the translight equations, until we can put them to use. I know my family company stands to reap the most profit from them, but that's not why I'm requesting this. Our world and our people have struggled a long time to rebuild from the point of near extinction. We were on the brink of leaping to other worlds when we were nearly destroyed by, not war, but a well-meaning geneticist, who hated the poverty and neglect so many of our children suffered because of overpopulation. This discovery, and the drive system which can make use of it, are the first real opportunity the lonoki have had to become more than that 'poor world,' whose people might have been important to the economic society of the galactic arm."

  "I think it will as well. I'm personally quite excited about it, but not sure I really understand your request I not report it."

  "We have no illusions that humans could very well overtake us and put ships into space before we can. You have resources we don't. Even a rumor of our discovery would put thousands of people to work on your worlds searching for what we'd found. I ask you give my people this chance to be proud of themselves and raise ourselves in the esteem of other species."

  "Todd! Stop the courier! Get that packet back here fast! I just realized I made a real error which could damage our friends the lonoki. He says he got the courier, Tarun. I'll take out the reference to what the discovery was in my report and explain why I did. You probably can't stop the news from leaking out, but that will slow it some."

  "I owe the trader who suggested I call you a large thank-you, Ambassador. I thank you as well."

  "You're welcome and I should have seen it. Tarun, when you're ready, I will file patent applications for you with all human and other species' agencies. I have a complete list. The equations can't be patented, of course, but the drive using them can be. That should assure your people the economic benefit of it, and the recognition by other species for the development of both it and the new solution of the equations."

  "I thank you again. Our own patent system is a large number of people refusing to do business with someone because they know a discovery or invention has been purloined. It wouldn't work if there were more of us and we should probably reinstitute formal patents, but we're rather afraid other species would swamp us with theirs and we'd learn most of our inventions are already patented under someone else's name."

  "There's a way around that. It's called a grandfather clause."

  "A what?"

  "It means that something already in use before the establishment of legal parameters, anything from an invention to a footpath, is considered an exception. Basically, 'You can't fence that off. I don't care if the surveyor does say it's on your property. We've been using it since my grandfather was a boy.' Hence, grandfather clause."

  "I like it. I like most things I learn about humans."

  "We like most things we learn about you too. My current big headache is keeping about twenty thousand sociologists and anthropologists from swarming over your world to learn more. My superior's big headache is trying to find a way to choose the one each I've recommended."

  "Talk to Wren Taylo. I think he'll be able to help. He'll have a very good idea of the type of personality that is needed. The one thing we don't want is someone who is
going to judge the culture we've built, against what he or she thinks we should have done instead, when disaster struck. I know professionals are supposed to maintain an impartial and non-judgmental attitude, but I also know humans are a great deal like we are and the professional attitude is an ideal which is very difficult to maintain."

  "Quite. I've sent two people home for just that reason. Our cultural attitudes do not fit your current biology and your physical similarity makes that very hard to remember. I have a large sign posted in the embassy reminding my staff of that fact."

  "My niece and her five males are preparing for the task of selling our discovery to the various species of the arm. Two of those males are the young male who found a new solution to the equations and the one who designed the power conversion system to use it. If they weren't an exceptionally emotionally stable group, I'd be looking for a way to convince her not to do it. I thoroughly believe she and Kiev Dane are a powerful enough combination to handle any situation which arises."

  "Kiev Dane?"

  "Is my niece Kiev's body slave. He is also about to garner eleven advanced rankings. I believe you would call them doctorates. They range from physics and computer programming to dance and musical performance. He's also quite a bit taller than average, physically powerful, red-haired and exceptionally attractive. The entire group are."

  "They'll still run into some close-minded bigots, Tarun, and not just human ones."

  "Kiev knows that, Ambassador. Wren Taylo and she are good friends and he has given her a very good idea of exactly what form that bigotry will take and its possible effect on her intended mission. She told him if someone called her an 'incestuous bitch' she'd work very hard to keep her males from turning that person into something that needs to be mopped up. 'Incestuous' wouldn't bother them a bit, but 'bitch' would irritate them immensely. He's not worried about them at all."

  "I don't think I am either."

  "I imagine they'll make it a point to meet you before they leave here. Ambassador, thank you, again. You've shown you're a true friend of my people and represent yours very well. I'm sure you're busy and I now have three calls waiting. I too will make it a point to meet you in person."