Past Lives

by Kirsten Bij't Vuur

  They clung together a little longer, totally spent, until John had gotten his breath back. His haunted look was gone for now, with them being safely hidden amongst the leaves, and Frances observed: 'Just wait until spring arrives, and everything comes to life again. You'll be stunned with all the green around you, even in the neighbourhood where Lukas lives.

  Do you feel better? No regrets?'

  A loving smile was her answer, and he seemed a little younger already.

  Frances did wonder what George knew about this whole situation, and she couldn't wait to see his reaction on beholding the fallen god. Maybe her husband would know who he was instantly.

  But with George's partiality for Hermes, she did deem it wise to have at least Lukas along when they first met, and preferably Paul and Melissa as

  well, to prevent John from getting another shock, so when John was showing signs of getting hungry again, she proposed they dress and find the others for a snack and a cup of coffee. Melissa must be ready with her inspection by now, hopefully with good results.

  Though not looking forward to going outside and meeting a lot of people, the promise of food did appeal to John, and he dressed and followed Frances through the greenhouse with its lovely plants, to the entrance, where they donned their coats and braved the cold once more.

  Inspection done, Melissa was ready for some rest. Though she was not going to admit it, climbing scaffolding was getting too difficult, and walking along the narrow boards was downright scary, her balance disturbed by her changing weight and a certain light-headedness that could come over her suddenly.

  As she stepped down in Paul's arms with relief a little too obvious to please herself, he crushed her against his own body and he whispered in her ear: 'That was your last formal inspection until you've had the baby. No argument, I can see how hard it is on you, I love you too much to risk a fall.'

  Suppressing tears, she went with him, Lukas, Frances and John to the manor house for their coffee. The work crew would get their coffee in a cabin Mr Jones had placed on every worksite.

  Paul had managed to convince Frances they could drink regular coffee, but she drew the line at the treats, so the whole crew had the same beautiful cakes or scrumptious pies with their coffee as the family had.

  Feeling Melissa's emotions as if they had their minds linked, Paul felt a little guilty for being bossy, but someone had to draw a line somewhere or she would work herself to death, or fall off a building towards her doom.

  'Please don't be angry, beloved, I didn't mean to be so bossy, it's just that I fear for you when you're up there. I know you feel dizzy sometimes, it's just not safe.'

  He barely got the time to finish his sentence before she was in his arms, crying quietly, and he didn't say anything anymore, he just held her.

  The others saw them stop, but Frances encouraged John and Lukas to just move along, having been in the same situation four times she knew it would be all right within minutes. Lukas was in doubt, but Frances needed him there when John met George, so she gestured to have him come along with the two of them, which he did, but with a question in his eyes.

  'I know who your ghostly guest was,' she said to him, 'and I'm rather

  certain George knows more than I did, so I want you present when they meet.

  You know how much George values your father.'

  Lukas understood immediately and followed her into the house.

  In the meantime, Melissa wondered why she was crying, so she dried her eyes and said: 'I'm sorry Paul, I don't know why I cry all the time, or get angry. You are right, I cannot do this anymore, it is too dangerous. I was very afraid to fall the whole time, but I wanted to know that all was well, it is our first structure and no other inspector can feel the iron as I can.'

  Relieved to find her back to her old self, he replied: 'It's the baby, love, your mind is preparing to be responsible for a new life. Both Frances and Lukas say it will pass once the baby is born.'

  She found that hard to believe, she couldn't even remember being level-headed and of a steady temperament anymore. But Ilsa didn't seem to mind very much, and Ilsa loved her job as much as Melissa did, she'd talk to her this afternoon.

  'But how will we know whether your parents' greenhouse is well-built?

  And what if I don't get inspections anymore after those months, what if they forget about me?'

  Of course he had an answer to that as well: 'You can easily check a structure from the ground to feel its soundness, love, your talent has grown so much, there is no need to climb on top of it anymore. That is just for the council regulations, you can let another inspector do that for my parents'

  glasshouse, and I'm sure Rupert will still want to have you check his materials and sites informally before the formal inspection.

  He'll make sure people remember you are the best inspector.'

  Aware of how easily she got upset, Melissa was also aware how easily she let herself be comforted, but when she thought of all the women she knew with children, she couldn't think of even one who was overly emotional or silly. Her mother, her sisters, Frances, all normal. Paul's mother had been pregnant five times, but she seemed as stable as her husband or even more so.

  That didn't mean she was less tired, so she let Paul take her arm and lead her inside, to a nice, soft couch by a cosy fire. A cup of Frances' coffee would do her good.

  As they sat down, Lukas was on her other side instantly, and instead of letting his cosseting irritate her, she wrapped him in her arms and kissed him lovingly. He nestled against her and put a hand on her belly, after such an

  afternoon of climbing and walking, the baby would certainly use a moment of rest to start exercising.

  Paul wanted a kiss too, and of course he got one, her bossy husband, the man of her dreams, still the handsomest man she knew.

  Suddenly she realized she had not said hello to George yet, so she looked up to greet him, but he wasn't there. Frances and John had made themselves comfortable on another couch, a decent distance between them but still Melissa could see the bond connecting them. They had made love, and a lot more besides.

  'I take it you liked the greenhouse, John?' she asked their new friend.

  His smile was worth millions, he was happy and very relaxed, he nodded fervently and replied: 'It was delightful, so nice and hot, and all the plants, I used to be very good with plants but Frances is just incredible, in the middle of winter it was all green.

  Some man in a black dress told me about a place called heaven one day, he gave me some hot soup and a place by a fire, so I listened to him and didn't argue with him, but now I realize it does exist: in Frances' greenhouse.'

  Chapter 28

  He didn't breathe a word about making love, six months in Victorian England had taught him better, but Melissa could see he was improved already, slightly younger, more vigorous, and less beat. And Frances too, she must have been without lover for quite some time, she looked radiant.

  The servants came in and brought a pot of coffee and today's treats, beautiful pies and whipped cream, and Frances decided to start without George, with three adult children it was a coming and going anyway, and she had long since given up on having everyone together at all mealtimes.

  Bertha had her tea in the kitchen with the staff more often than in the living-room.

  But as soon as the coffee was poured, George did come in, and even though Lukas was a daily visitor with the family, he nonetheless jumped up from Melissa's embrace and greeted his very dear friend with a loving hug and some kisses.

  'Always happy to see you too, Lukas,' George said, laughing, 'what gives you such an excellent mood, did the frame pass Melissa's testing?'

  Lukas smiled, and replied: 'That, and I found a beloved friend back that I didn't even know was missing.'

  Only then did George look towards their visitor, and his face paled instantly. To the others, it was not clear whether the recognition was mutual, for John was no longer on the couch, but behind it. Lukas fol
lowed him with a cry of dismay, and everything was in an uproar for a short moment.

  Then Paul got up, too, and said to George: 'It is clear you know John, and I for one am eager to know how and why.'

  And with that he followed Lukas towards where John had disappeared.

  Frances kept her calm, got up and kissed her husband on his cheeks, then poured coffee for him, bid him to sit down next to Melissa until the guys had John calmed down.

  'Somehow you frightened him, and he's not going to calm down with you standing there, staring at him.'

  She had always been good with frightened creatures, and George did

  what she said, no longer pale but clearly with strong feelings, mixed feelings.

  No anger though, that much was apparent.

  Melissa took his hand and squeezed it, George was feeling very uncomfortable and she wanted him to feel better. George was above her suspicion, she was convinced he would have nothing to do with John's neglect.

  Finally Lukas and Paul managed to talk the gaunt figure from behind the couch, and he sat down in his former seat, but flanked by both men, to make him feel safe. He was still nervous, but he could speak, and his voice sounded calmer than expected: 'I'm sorry, Sir, to have fled your presence so ungraciously just now, I usually have better manners. But I have had some unpleasant experiences the last four months or so, and now I'm a bit skittish in the presence of men. Nothing personal, I'm quite pleased to meet you, actually. I'm John.'

  But he did not offer to shake hands, and he did not get up from his seat.

  Nor did George get up to greet him, he could see that his presence frightened the little man, and since he could guess what the experiences had been, he quietly drank his coffee and kept very still, until Paul threw a significant look at him. George now clearly showed his feelings: they were guilt and shame.

  'I know who you are, John, though I knew of you by a different name.

  Hermes told me about you when he left you here, had me drive by the place where he had left you twice during that stay, and he pointed you out to me.

  You looked different then.

  In fact, he asked me to keep a bit of an eye on you, see if you were doing well, begging me to interfere if something threatened to go wrong.

  I objected, said I could place you in my factory, with a roof over your head and a job to sustain you, though it would be hard, unschooled work. But he said you needed love and had skills to keep yourself young and fed. I was afraid it would go wrong, out in the streets, with no clue of our society and winter coming, but I didn't insist.

  A grave error on my part, and one I am very sorry for. I hope you will give me the chance to redeem myself.

  But to continue the story, I did keep an eye on you, drove by regularly and saw you doing quite well for a few weeks, with a room to stay in, some money to spend, as much power as you could still contain.

  And I let my guard down, one busy week I neglected to check on you,

  and you were gone without a trace. I tried to find you, employed someone to catch your trail, but he failed, though he searched for weeks.

  And there I erred again, for I should have come clear to Lukas about you, but I didn't. After some time I didn't dare anymore, I guessed something bad must have happened to you, and clearly I was not wrong.

  Again, I'm sorry. I should have told Hermes you didn't have a chance to survive a London winter without an idea of what was coming and some protection. I thought Hermes knew what he was doing, but of course he wasn't. Your society is so much different. Why didn't he just leave you in your own world? I never got that.'

  Strangely enough, it was Paul who was really angry, Lukas just seemed happy to have his friend back alive, though certainly not well.

  But Paul, he would have shouted if that wouldn't have scared John even more. He said: 'I knew you were infatuated, George, but you knew what a winter in London was like, and how morals were so totally different from what he was used to. There was no way he could have made a living the way he tried. Look at him! Lukas found him by chance, one more week and he would have been dead. I don't care what he did, but that was just plain cruel.'

  George bowed his head and nodded, and said: 'I made a big mistake, and I'm very sorry you suffered for it so much, John. Hermes was so sure of himself but of course he knew nothing. Paul is right, I was infatuated. Will I ever be able to make it up to you?'

  John apparently thought it was time to say something, and he observed:

  'Don't beat yourself up over what cannot be changed, Sir. I survived, I have Lukas back in my life, and some hope to be able to make a life for myself here.

  Hermes was right not to leave me in our world, I would have died within a day without magic. Hera was always out for my blood, I'd rather have died here than give her the pleasure.'

  Impressed, George said: 'Thank you, John, your mildness puts me to shame, I'm more of Paul's opinion myself. I should have known better. Please don't call me Sir, just George suffices, I have a feeling we will become acquainted quite well. Can we shake hands?'

  John nodded, and George approached him carefully, slowly, then stuck out his hand. As John took it, George blanked out for a second, and when he released it he said: 'Would it please you if I got your magic restored to you? I cannot do it on my own, but with the help of Paul here, and Tristan, my son-

  in-law, I think we can break the magic blocking it.'

  This offer stunned John, and he blurted out: 'But won't that make Hermes really angry? What would keep me from going back home?'

  George replied: 'It will make him angry, yes, but I know what is right, and this wasn't. You have a right to make a living, and with magic that will be much easier, even on our world. And I cannot stop you from going back, but you would be hunted down and probably killed, you cannot oppose Hermes'

  family and Hera. Better stay here for a while yet, enjoy spring and summer with Lukas, see how it goes.

  I'm so sorry I did nothing to prevent this, John. And I'm sorry, Paul, to have disappointed you. Will you help me anyway?'

  'Actually, John's forgiving nature puts me to shame, George, who says I wouldn't have made a worse mistake. I shouldn't be so quick to judge a man I look up to as a father.

  And of course I will help you give this man his magic back, he has suffered and I think he has changed as much as Hermes did. For I am certain Hermes meant well, I do not believe he would have agreed to let John die of deprivation and abuse over the course of six months, he would rather have killed him outright.'

  Frances now told her husband: 'It would be excellent if you could return John's magic, for I have offered him a job to help me plant the greenhouse, and with his magic we may succeed in finally getting those seedlings to thrive. He's bred new vines from seed, you know.'

  This pleased George, and he looked at his wife really well and said: 'I'm glad to hear that, Frances, you see I had a hunch I'd see more of him, him being Greek and all, and needing a lot of love like other Greek gods I know.'

  To anyone except John himself, this was George telling his wife he was glad she had found a new lover, one she was likely to be able to enjoy for some time, for his love of plants and for his prowess.

  Melissa, feeling much better with a cup of Frances' excellent coffee inside her, suspected that one of them would need to explain it to John that night. It would be a great relief for him to know that George had given his permission for the affair, as Frances accepted George's relationship with Lukas and Hermes.

  What John did notice, was that Lukas and Paul went back to Melissa, and Frances moved a little closer to him, he supposed to give him some moral

  support in dealing with everything that had come out.

  Though Paul had been very much disappointed in George, John was actually moved that Hermes had tried to give him a little security, to have asked someone to keep an eye out for him. To know that they even cared was very touching, but not enough to keep him from accepting George's offer to get his magic back.


  The vague hope to be possibly reinstated back home did not outweigh the chance to make something of his life here, and magic would be such an asset, the ability to defend himself from danger, to heal his own body, and he seriously meant to help Frances raise those plants, he had felt so incredibly happy in that greenhouse, he wanted to go right back.

  But he was happy as well to be living with Lukas for now, until his magic was active again he felt much safer with Lukas and Paul, he had not missed how Paul had stood up for him against someone he clearly loved and admired, almost as a father.

  They talked a lot about the new greenhouse, how long the glazing would take, and what was next, when the first plants could be moved.

  That was when Frances asked Paul: 'Would you please check out the piping and the boiler in the old greenhouse for me? I planned to ask you this summer, but I forgot, it was so hot in there already. But it seems to me there is a leak, and the boiler seems to be building up too much pressure sometimes. It is ten years old, maybe I should order a new one from you.'

  Paul replied: 'We will, right after coffee. Overpressure is dangerous, I know you need that boiler, but if it goes up you'll lose the plants for sure. I will see if we can repair this one, or just keep it going safely one more month.

  You coming, Lukas?'

  Lukas nodded, and asked Melissa: 'Will you stay here? You should probably take some rest.' He was afraid of a catty answer, but Melissa had given up: 'I will, Lukas, I ám tired, I admit it, though I feel better for a cup of coffee. But Ilsa is expected and I want to see her.'

  'I'm tired, too,' John said, 'I've pushed myself a lot, today, do you mind if I stay here, with you, Melissa?'

  She replied: 'I don't mind at all, John, I'll be pleased to have some company until Ilsa arrives. You should know that Ilsa's husband will probably accompany her, and he is a very large and very powerful man. Very friendly, though, and he looks it, too.'

  That gave a moment's thought to John, but he observed: 'Didn't George

  mention him being part of an effort to unbind my magic?' Melissa nodded, pleasantly surprised to find him so observant, so soon after being delusional with hunger.