by M J Hardy
I feel the tears pricking my eyes and say shakily, “They think I murdered Richard?”
She nods and I put my face in my hands and sob loudly. It’s too much. Nobody believes me, not even who I once classed as friends.
Gloria places her hand on my back and rubs gently. “There, there, they’ll soon learn it was all a misunderstanding. I’m sure when the trial begins the evidence will prove your innocence.”
I look at her in anguish. “Are you sure about that, Gloria? I mean, from what I can see, the evidence is pointing to my guilt, not the other way around.”
She looks at me sympathetically and I can see it in her eyes. She doesn’t believe me. Gloria is the best friend I have ever had and even she doesn’t believe me. She strokes my hair as a mother would comfort a child and says warmly, “Listen, I don’t have long but when I saw you, I had to come. I’ll be back later and take you out somewhere. Maybe to the supermarket. You must be running low by now and I’m sure the odd supplies I keep bringing you aren’t your usual choice. Why don’t you take a bath, wash your hair, anything to make yourself feel better and hang tight for me? I think you’ve been holed up in this place long enough, don’t you? I mean, it’s enough to send anyone crazy.”
I nod miserably as she moves towards the back door. “Give me a couple of hours, honey, that’s all it will take.”
As she heads outside, I think about what she said. Would I think the same way as my neighbours if it was one of them? Probably and that tells me what a shallow world we live in. Richmond Avenue is a great place to live all the time you don’t step outside the parallel lines of normality. Mess with those lines at your peril because they will ultimately trip you up in the end.
Sighing, I head off to do as Gloria suggested. Maybe I should take some time to wallow in my own self-pity and make myself feel as normal as I can because I am looking forward to getting out of this place. Gloria has just thrown me a lifeline. A change of scene and non-judgemental people who won’t know who I am. Maybe for a couple of hours at least, I can be normal again.
Chapter 20
We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone. Orson Welles
Two hours later and there is no sign of Gloria. I’ve been ready and waiting for close on half an hour but there’s no sign of her. I see her coffee coloured car parked in her driveway so she must be home. Gloria isn’t the sort to walk anywhere and I’ve never seen her out for a run.
An hour later and there’s still no sign. I feel a little exasperated because I’ve been pinning so much hope on this brief shopping trip. Just the promise of a fresh scene and an activity as mundane as grocery shopping is starting to mean the world to me and I’m impatient to go. Maybe I should just drive myself. I mean, I’m surprised I never thought of it before. However, the thought of sitting behind a steering wheel again fills me with dread. My car is long gone. It was never returned after the accident and I’m happy about that. I never want to see it again because it killed someone I held dear. The one woman who had everything and because of my own stupidity was left with nothing.
I could take Richard’s car but the thought of sitting where he once sat also fills me with dread. Just touching the wheel is enough to give me a panic attack and being in a closed space of his is too much to bear. It’s difficult enough being faced with his clothes hanging in the wardrobe every day. I half expect to see him getting ready as I choose my outfit. Just the sight of his perfectly tailored suits and pristine shirts hanging in order of colour makes me feel dizzy. The smell of his aftershave lingers in the dressing room and his polished leather shoes mock me from their positions on the shelves.
Richard is everywhere I look and yet somehow, I have accepted this part of him. Inanimate objects that tell me he lived here once. Reminding me of the monster within who made me live in fear. I need those reminders to keep me strong to deal with the present because if I allow it, I will fold under this huge pressure. I can feel it. I am living on a fine line between madness and the future. Which way I fall will be the decider, so I need to remain focused and sharp.
Feeling a little stronger, I decide to head next door and see if Gloria’s home. I should have done this days ago.
It feels strange venturing outside the perimeter of the house for the first time. It feels wrong and as if I’m doing something I shouldn’t. I see nobody as I make the short journey, yet feel as if I’m being watched from behind the twitching curtains.
Feeling my bravery fast deserting me, I try to tell myself I’m doing something I have always done and not to be afraid. I need to be strong and I can be strong. After all, it’s just a brief visit next door.
Reaching the front door, I take a deep breath and ring the doorbell. Somewhere inside I hear voices but no footsteps heading my way. I press the bell again and wait nervously. Once again, five minutes pass and nobody comes.
Feeling irritated I head around the back. There must be someone in. I can hear them.
Reaching the back door, I place my hand on the handle and test it. It turns freely and the door inches open a little more. I call out loudly, “Gloria, it’s Sarah, are you in here?”
I hear the voices coming from the room at the front of the house and follow the sound. It feels wrong, like an intruder with no right to be here.
As I reach the room, I see the television playing out noisily and realise the voices I heard came from that. There is nobody here and then I see a familiar image flash on the screen. I recognise the place and my heart stops. Gander Green lane.
I stare at the screen as the reporter’s voice tells me everything I need to hear.
Earlier today, Police were called when a dog walker found a man’s body in the woods behind Gander Green lane. Early indications are that it’s the missing solicitor Richard Standon. Viewers may remember the fatal accident here less than two weeks ago where a local resident, Ellie Matthews, was knocked down and killed by the car driven by Sarah Standon, Richard Standon’s wife.
With me is Detective Inspector Jones of the Metropolitan police who is in charge of this case. “What can you tell the viewers of this reported find?”
I watch in disbelief as officer Jones looks into the camera with an extremely grave expression.
“I can confirm that earlier today, a man’s body was found in the woods behind us. Forensics’ are currently attending the scene and we are trying to identify him. The body looks to be of a similar age and build to the missing solicitor Richard Standon and we are carrying out tests to clarify that.”
I step back in shock. Richard? It can’t be… can it?
The screen flicks back to the studio and the story changes and I try to think clearly. Could it be Richard? What if he crawled away injured from the scene and died in those woods? But that wouldn’t explain the things that have been happening and the phone call – surely.
As I step outside the room, I hear a sound coming from upstairs. I’m not sure why but I move silently towards the stairs. With one hand on the bannisters, I start to move up them slowly and carefully. I should call out, I should walk away, anything but creep around where I don’t belong. However, something is compelling me to discover what it is. The voices get louder with each step I take. I hear a woman’s moans and my heart rate increases. Gloria.
I hear banging which reminds me of the headboard as Richard thrust inside me angrily, brutally, like a feral beast. The moans turn to groans and I stop. This is wrong. It must be Gloria with her fitness trainer. It’s probably why she had to get back. Even I know nothing gets in the way of her workout with him.
The trouble is, my mind is telling me to walk away but I can’t. I know it’s wrong but I need to know. As I inch towards the landing, I hear her cry out which brings me to my senses. I need to leave.
I turn away and run silently, stealthily, back the way I came. My heart hammers as I flee the scene with all the images swirling around my mind from what I’ve
learned inside this house.
Without another thought, I head towards the back door. Then I see it and it stops me in my tracks.
Hanging on the back of the wooden chair at the table is a familiar sight. One I would know from any other because of the stitching inside the neck. The custom silk lining that brands it as his. Richard’s jacket. Not the tracksuit of a personal trainer. Not Edward’s usual pilot’s uniform. Richard’s tailored jacket that costs more than our monthly mortgage payment, hanging on the back of Gloria’s chair while she entertains him upstairs.
I feel sick and my head spins as I charge outside. Taking a deep breath, I flee the scene and don’t stop running until I’m safely inside the house. Bolting the door, I race to the hallway and grab the phone before racing to the window overlooking Gloria’s house. Shakily, I dial Tony’s number and wait for him to answer, all the time watching for Richard to leave the house next door.
The phone switches to voicemail and I say breathlessly, “Please, Tony, it’s Sarah Standon. Please, can you come? I think Richard’s next door.”
I hang up and then try again. Still, no answer and so I try again. I keep on trying with one eye on the street outside. He’s in there. I know he is.
In frustration, I turn my attention to the local police station and call the number instead. A voice says sternly, “Hayes-Standing police station. How may I help you?”
I say breathlessly, “Please can someone come. I’m Sarah Standon at number 15 Richmond Avenue. My husband, Richard is missing and they think it’s his body on Gander Green lane. I think he’s in the house next door, number 14 Richmond Avenue.”
There’s a brief silence, and the operator says firmly, “The officers are on their way. Please, can you confirm your identity?”
I whisper, “Sarah Standon. His wife. Please hurry, I know it’s him.”
She reassures me, “The officers are on their way and I will notify the officer in charge of the case.”
With shaking hands, I replace the phone and stare at the house next door. Gloria and Richard. Of course. Why am I so blind? The screams start in my mind as the memory I have tried so hard to erase revisits me.
Chapter 21
Four Years Earlier
Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power. Abraham Lincoln
Richard wants something. I can tell by the way he is looking at me. He smiles sexily as he dresses in his black jeans that hug his body and make my mouth water. He pulls a tight-fitting top over his broad, muscular body and my breath hitches. His eyes flash as he stares at me with the look that always brings me to my knees. Pure, sexual desire. His eyes have a spark to them tonight. He is excited I can tell and I smile. “You look happy, darling.”
He nods and walks towards me and I feel my heart race. He runs his hand around my waist and pulls me close and whispers, “I’m looking forward to tonight, baby.”
I laugh softly. “What, dinner with the neighbours?”
He smiles. “Among other things.”
Shaking my head, I feel the desire inside as he lowers his mouth to my neck. A gentle nip and then a suck and I’m putty in his hands. He groans, “You look good enough to eat my darling. I am going to enjoy showing you something different tonight.”
I’m almost tempted to ditch our plans this evening and tell him to make our excuses but it’s Gloria’s birthday. We’ve been invited to share the occasion and to my knowledge are the only ones so it would be rude to let her down. Richard laughs softly. “You know how happy you make me, baby.”
I nod, feeling the delicious thrill flood through me that marriage to this man always brings. “Same for me, darling. You have made me the happiest woman on earth.”
His lips find mine and I kiss my husband as if I can’t get enough and I can’t. I can never get enough of Richard. I still pinch myself that I’m married to such a wonderful man. A man that makes my pulse race and my heart sing. A man that fulfils me in every way and I can’t live without. I am the luckiest woman in the world.
He pulls back and winks and grabs hold of my hand.
“We had better go now before this goes the way it always does. Save this moment, baby because it promises great rewards later.”
Shivering in anticipation, I follow him from the dressing room. A woman in love and blind to any flaws that may reveal themselves. Richard can do no wrong in my eyes, he never could.
Edward answers the door and smiles his welcome. “Good to see you, come in. The birthday girl is knocking back the champagne already.”
Richard slaps him on the back and says loudly, “Good to see you, Ed. This promises to be a night to remember.”
I’m not sure why but his words surprise me. I wonder what they have up their sleeve because they share a look that confuses me. They have a secret and by the look in their eyes, it’s one they can’t wait to get out in the open.
As we follow Edward, I whisper, “What’s going on, have you got a surprise for Gloria?”
Richard winks. “All in good time.”
Shaking my head, I follow them into the kitchen where Gloria is setting out plates of food on the table. “Hey, guys, good to see you.”
She smiles excitedly and moves across to kiss us on the cheeks. I say warmly, “Happy birthday, Gloria, you’re looking lovely tonight.”
She laughs self-consciously. “Not bad for someone turning thirty.”
Edward slips his arm around her shoulders and pulls her close, dropping a light kiss on the top of her head.
“She’s still my sexy 21-year-old.”
Gloria giggles and I watch slightly embarrassed as he kisses her deeply, a long, lingering, kiss that appears to go on forever. Sneaking a look at Richard, I see him watching them with a strange look in his eyes. For the first time in their company, I feel uncomfortable.
After what seems like ages, they pull back and Gloria rolls her eyes. “Sorry guys. What can I say, I married a beast?”
I laugh nervously and Edward looks at me and smirks and something about the look in his eyes sets me on edge. Trying to shake a bad feeling, I say brightly, “Let me help you, Gloria. You shouldn’t be working on your birthday.”
She smiles, and we set about laying out the food. It all looks delicious and they have obviously gone to a great deal of trouble. Richard and Edward drift off with beers in hand and occasionally I hear loud laughter coming from their direction.
Gloria shakes her head. “Look at them. A couple of grown-up kids if ever I saw them.”
Laughing, I have to agree. There is a lightness of spirit to them tonight. They are carefree and excitable and I’m happy to see it. I smile. “Yes, it’s good to see Richard having fun. He works so hard and doesn’t get much time to relax and chill. It’s good to see.”
Gloria smiles. “You’re so lucky, Sarah. You have it all. Beautiful home, good looks and fantastic clothes. And as for that husband of yours, he’s something else entirely. He could be a movie star or something, he has that look about him.”
I nod, feeling a little smug as I see the jealousy in her eyes. Yes, Richard is a catch, I’ve always known that. I see the envy in the other women’s eyes as they follow him around the room. I see the covetous looks and feel my heart fill to bursting. He’s mine, all mine and I’m the luckiest girl on the planet.
We sit down to eat and talk about the usual things. Neighbours, work, holidays. The usual conversation that neighbours share and all the time the alcohol flows freely. I relax in the company of good people, good food and good wine and feel a warm glow of contentment as I thoroughly enjoy my evening.
At first, I don’t notice anything strange. A lingering glance from Edward that lasts a fraction of a second longer than it should. A brief touch from Gloria as she brushes imaginary food from my lips with her thumb. The pressure of Richard’s leg against mine, causing the desire to increase as I feel his hard body against me. The brush of a foot against my ankle and the seductive music causing a change in the at
mosphere. The temperature increases in the room and Edward says lightly, “Shall we take our drinks into the other room?”
I should have taken more notice of the looks they all shared. I certainly noticed them but pushed them away as nothing. I grab hold of my glass and follow them to the hallway and then look with surprise as they head for the stairs. Looking at Richard in confusion, I can see a change in him immediately. As Gloria and Edward made to walk up the stairs, Richard grabs my hand and whispers, “Trust me, Sarah.”
I say in confusion. “What do you mean?”
He says in a low voice. “Follow my lead and you will have the night of your life.”
I think the realisation hits me hard because I stumble back and say in a low voice, “No.”
His expression changes immediately and he grabs my wrist and growls, “You will do as I say or suffer the consequences. Trust me, Sarah. I won’t let any harm come to you.”
He pushes me towards the stairs and I stumble.
I hold on to the bannisters and say fearfully, “I can’t do this - I won’t do this.”
Richard snarls, “Don’t make me angry. You won’t like what that means.”
Gloria stands at the top of the stairs and looks worried. “Is everything ok?”
Edward looks at Richard and says, “I thought you said she’d agree.”
I shout, “No, I don’t want to. I’m going home.”
Turning away, I make towards the door and the silence follows me out. I walk home alone. I let myself inside and run sobbing upstairs. I can’t believe what just happened. What they wanted me to do. I’m not a fool, I saw where this evening was ending up. I can’t believe Richard wanted me to be part of whatever they had planned.