by Tiana Smith
I tried to settle back in the empty gondola seat. The metal was hard and uncomfortable, making me think of how much better it’d been to lean against Logan while he held my hand. But I didn’t want to think about Logan. Or the way his hair swung into his eyes, or how I felt when he teased me, or any of those thoughts that made me miss him more than I already did. His rejection left a crater-size hole that no amount of cotton candy could fill.
The Ferris wheel had been a bad idea. I shouldn’t have come to the Pier in the first place.
My gondola stopped at the bottom, and despite my second thoughts about the whole thing, I was ready to give the worker a piece of my mind for accepting my money but breaking his promise. That is until I looked up to see Logan standing there beside the worker.
At first, I couldn’t believe it. Thinking of him had made me hallucinate. It couldn’t be real.
Logan. Here. My brain wasn’t making sense of what was happening, but he was smiling, so that had to be a good thing, right?
He looked good, too. How was I supposed to play things cool when he looked that good? Curse him and his tousled hair. His gray Henley that hugged his frame and made him seem irresistibly toned. I didn’t need those things right now.
Correction: I really needed all those things—as close to me as possible.
“Mind if I join you?” Logan asked as the worker opened my bar to let him in. What was I supposed to say? And why wasn’t I saying anything? Speak, Mia! Oh goodness, now I was talking to myself like a dog. Or thinking to myself, rather. That was even worse. What was wrong with me? My cheeks felt flushed, and I nervously scooted over so there’d be enough room for him to sit. By me. He gave me a hesitant, uncertain smile. Maybe he didn’t know that my answer was, and always would be, yes. My pulse was beating so hard, he could probably feel its reverberations from my palm to where it touched the seat.
Logan sat down, and the worker lowered the bar once again and sent us on our way. We slowly rose up to the sky, and as we did, my heart seemed to rise, too. The air seemed different with him here. It was charged with energy, like one spark could set off something either amazing or terrible. Only time would tell which. The anticipation was so intense, I couldn’t figure out what to do with my hands. They seemed awkward on the seat, so I moved them to the bar. But their shaking was so obvious that I shoved them under my legs, hoping Logan wouldn’t notice.
“How’d you know I was here?” I finally asked when the silence grew to be too much.
Logan put one arm on the back of the seat, and my brain went into hyperdrive, analyzing whether he thought of it as a friendly gesture. It was technically draped over the chair and not my shoulders, but if I leaned back just a little, we’d be touching. I couldn’t bring myself to do it, no matter how much I wanted to. I was frozen now, waiting for him to realize his mistake and withdraw his arm.
“A little birdie told me,” he said. “A Robyn.”
“Ah,” I said. I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised that she would stop by Logan’s on her way to school. It was a wonder we hadn’t run into each other.
“I tried calling you,” I said. What I really wanted to ask was Why did you ignore me? But I couldn’t bring myself to say it.
“My parents took my phone away,” he said.
I hadn’t known that. But man, did it make me hope. Because if he hadn’t been ignoring me …
“Robyn told me I had to read today’s paper,” Logan said. “Specifically, an article on the front page written by a mutual friend.”
Friend. He’d said friend. I mean, it wasn’t like he would have said mutual girlfriend. So I shouldn’t start panicking. Yet. But I was definitely panicking. Why had Logan said friend? Was he only repeating what Robyn had told him? He had to know I was analyzing every single word that came from his lips. Oh no. Now I was thinking about his lips. I stared at them and wondered what it’d feel like to have them on mine right now. Of course, that wouldn’t happen. Because Logan had said friend.
I muffled that part of my brain and tried to remember what Logan had just said. Something about my article. Oh no, what if he hated it?
“You read it?” I asked, too surprised to worry whether my tone offended him. “But you never read the paper.”
“Sometimes I make exceptions.” He nudged me.
A warmth blossomed in my chest at that, like fuzzy slippers in the morning. He’d read the paper. For me.
“I’m so sorry about that pros-and-cons list.” I swallowed. “It was old, and I wasn’t even writing the truth. I was just trying so desperately to pretend like I was right, and I never meant to hurt you.”
He gave me a weak smile. “I’m sorry I reacted so badly. It caught me off-guard.”
“You had every right to react the way you did,” I said, shaking my head.
“Yeah, I guess I wasn’t ready for someone to say just how ridiculous my hair looks. Let me see … ‘like a wannabe Harry Styles,’ isn’t that right?” He grinned, and I fought the urge to reach out and touch the hair in question.
“It’s grown on me,” I said, shrugging a shoulder. “Who knew I had a thing for boy bands?”
“And you can live with my being ‘permanently attached to my camera like it’s a baby’? Your words, not mine. Because I will have you know, I don’t always carry it with me. Like right now. I totally proved you wrong.” He held up his free hand to show it was empty, and I wanted to hold it in mine. I bit my lip instead.
“That, too. I am definitely okay with that.”
“And you said you don’t think I’m serious. About anything?” His voice dropped low, sending shivers up my arms. He caught my gaze, and I was frozen to the spot, unable to move for fear of breaking the spell. “I can prove you wrong about that, too.”
“So, so sorry about that one,” I said, my words barely loud enough to carry between us.
“It was a mistake, Mia.” His eyes were intent on mine. “It happens. You didn’t mean any harm by it, just like you didn’t know how to fix things after you emailed Vince.”
“I’m sorry about that, too,” I said. I sounded like a broken record, but I couldn’t help it.
“You might have said that—about a bazillion times in your article. But I’ve had some time to think about everything, and I can see why you did it. I’m good.” He nudged me with the hand draped across the back of the seat, pulling me slightly closer. I smiled and scooted over.
Still leaving his arm behind me, Logan reached across with his other and intertwined his fingers with mine. It felt so good, I momentarily forgot what we were talking about. Then he stroked my hand with his thumb, and I was so far gone I couldn’t have come back if I tried.
“So we’re…?” I trailed off. I wanted to ask if that meant we were officially together, but I didn’t want to risk him saying no.
Logan’s mouth curved up.
“We’re good,” he said. “More than good. We’re great.”
I was mush. Pure and simple. There was nothing else Logan could have said that would have made me more gooey.
Logan slid his arm down so it settled around my shoulders, and I relaxed against him. How could I have thought this seat was uncomfortable before? I didn’t ever want to leave.
He kissed my temple, and sunlight warmed every part of my body.
He let go of my hand to cup my face. I felt my pulse speed up in anticipation of what would happen next. He leaned in even closer, and I could feel his breath on my skin.
“Mia,” he said, his eyes focused on mine. “I’m going to kiss you now.”
“Hmm.” I pretended to consider, but really, I would probably burst if he didn’t kiss me soon. “A kiss at the top of a Ferris wheel? I don’t know. Isn’t that too cliché?”
He didn’t bother answering me, and for that, I was grateful. He closed the distance between us and placed his lips gently on mine. His kiss was soft and slow, a promise that we’d have all the time in the world. A promise I could believe in.
My fingers tangl
ed in his hair, and I pulled him closer to me. He wound one arm around my back and placed the other at my waist. He deepened the kiss, and I gladly reciprocated. His kiss warmed me from the inside out, and despite the autumn wind, I could have stayed in that moment forever. Never had it felt so right to have someone’s lips on mine.
After a few moments, he pulled away and rested his forehead on mine. Our breath mingled in the air, and we both smiled. His hand stroked my cheek, and I leaned into it.
“I hope you don’t mind, but I asked Robyn if you guys could hang out some other time,” he said. “She didn’t seem too sorry about breaking her promise to meet you here.”
“I don’t mind.” I smiled, and he kissed me again.
We rode the Ferris wheel for a long time.
twenty-seven
Elena’s house lit up the entire street.
“I thought this wasn’t supposed to be a big deal,” Logan said as we stepped onto a porch decorated with hanging stars. He looked super good in his all-black tux, and I was incredibly grateful that Elena had insisted we all dress up for her fake homecoming party. And that the tux rental place had a no-cancellations policy. My dad had taken pictures back at my house, with Logan’s camera. Of course, Logan adjusted all the settings and told my dad exactly where to stand and how to frame the shot, so maybe they’d actually turn out okay. I was totally going to plaster them all over my room the second they got printed.
“Yeah, well, you know Elena,” I said as I rang the doorbell. Logan caught my hand on its way down and wove his fingers through mine. It sent tingles up my arm. When Elena opened the door, it was to see me gazing up at Logan with a pathetically goofy grin on my face.
“Well, well, what do we have here?” She tsked. “I thought you were supposed to reserve this kind of behavior for your own porch at the end of a night.”
“I, ummm…” I stammered.
Then she squealed and pulled me into a hug. “I’m so happy for you two! Tonight will be awesome. Mia, you look amazing. I hope you don’t mind that I invited a few more people. Most of them are just stopping by for a minute before going to the homecoming dance.”
I turned to Logan and gave him my I told you so face. He chuckled and nodded, admitting I was right. Of course, I’d had an inkling of her plans when she’d mentioned her party in her last gossip column.
Elena led us inside, and I saw some people from school milling around, dancing to the music coming from Elena’s sound system. There were only about twenty people, but I had a feeling the crowd would only grow as the night went on. Athens High wasn’t exactly known for its killer dances, so more people would bounce here as they grew fed up with soft hits and dress codes enforced with honest-to-goodness rulers. With Logan at my side, though, I found I wasn’t bothered by the extra people. He wrapped an arm around my waist, and I leaned into him, taking advantage of the opportunity to breathe in his scent.
Elena brought Vince over to where we stood, and I braced myself for the inevitable awkwardness. It seemed like everyone in the room tensed, as if waiting for another fight to break out.
“Hey, man,” Logan said, surprising me by smiling.
“I see you’ve stopped chasing my girlfriend,” Vince said. He put an arm across Elena’s shoulders, and she poked him in the side.
“I see you’ve stopped chasing mine,” Logan answered. Vince smirked and extended his fist toward Logan, who bumped it with his own.
And that seemed to be it. I’d never understood how guys could do that. I mean, they could easily put anything behind them as long as they each got to throw a couple of punches. It made absolutely no sense. The room returned to a normal noise level, and people went back to their own conversations.
“I’m glad you guys came,” Elena said. “And that you’re together. Mia, Logan is lucky to have you.”
“Hmm,” I said, looking up at him. “More like I’m the one who’s lucky to have him.” Really, really lucky. About a lot of things.
Elena smiled, and she actually looked really happy for me. It might have been an act, but it was enough to give me hope we’d be able to move past all this eventually. She seemed to be thinking the same thing.
“Mia, I know things have been … rocky between us lately, but I promise I’m going to try to make it up to you. First, by pointing you to the kitchen. My mom let me buy your favorite cheesecake.”
Okay, forget about the five pounds I knew I’d put on during my moping period. There was no way I could resist the siren call of cheesecake. Especially with the weird diet my mom was enforcing at our house. I’d eaten most of my comfort stash over the last few days, so this might be the last time I’d be able to ingest copious amounts of sugar for a while. Plus, going to another room eliminated the need for awkward chitchat with Elena.
“Thanks, Elena,” I said as Logan steered me away, toward the kitchen. He knew me too well.
The kitchen was empty at the moment, and I took an extra-large slice. I’ll admit, though, it was hard to focus on cheesecake with the way Logan was looking at me. He took a fork from the counter and stole a bite from my plate.
“You’re lucky you’re so cute,” I teased. “People have paid dearly for lesser offenses.”
“Mmmm,” he said around a mouthful of cheesecake. He swallowed and licked his lips, which drew my attention to his mouth. “I’m glad you think I’m cute then.” He put one arm behind me and leaned close.
He kissed me then, and his kisses were better than cheesecake. Especially when he put an arm on either side of me, pinning me to the counter. His body was so close to mine, I could feel him breathe, which made me deliriously happy. For the first time in a long time, all of me felt full. Maybe Joey had won the internship and the future of the paper was uncertain, but my dreams didn’t end there. I was realizing there were lots of options, some I’d never considered. Like Logan. I wound my arms around his neck and focused on pouring all my emotions into the kiss. If anyone could see me then, I was pretty sure I was glowing.
We hid out in the kitchen for a while. When we emerged, I spotted Robyn in the crowd.
“You came!” I said, and hugged her. “So have you and Elena talked?”
“Yeah, I guess we’re okay now that she knows I had nothing to do with your mess.” Robyn elbowed me in the side. “Plus she said she bought cheesecake, so I guess all is forgiven.”
There was a reason Robyn and I were best friends. “Hey,” I said, remembering the last time we’d spoken on Thursday morning. “You still owe me muddy buddies.”
“Ah, but I delivered something so much better,” she said, tilting her head toward Logan, who placed a kiss on my temple. She did have a point there.
“True. Thank you for telling Logan to read the article.”
Robyn smirked, placing her hands on her hips. “You two be good now. I need to go find some other lost souls in need of matchmaking.”
“You didn’t come with a date?” I asked. Sure, she hadn’t mentioned asking Joey, but she was Cupid. Why didn’t she use her skills to help herself?
“Why would I need a date when I have so much work to do?” Robyn asked, flashing me a grin. Was it just me, or did her smile falter a bit?
“You know what they say, ‘always a matchmaker, never a…’” I trailed off, because I had no idea where I was going with that comment.
Robyn just looked at me, clearly unimpressed with my half metaphor.
“I think I’m good. Okay then,” she said, shrugging. “I’m off.”
She gave me a wave and disappeared into the crowd, leaving me standing with Logan. Maybe I sucked at playing matchmaker, but there was still one person I felt could benefit from me stepping in. One day. Soon.
Logan put his arms around me, and I leaned my head against his chest. There were other couples dancing around us, but it felt like we were all alone.
“I think I’m going to look up some online student-run papers,” I told Logan. He pulled back to see my face, his arms still encircled about my waist.
“Yeah.” There were multiple ways to achieve one dream. Robyn had taught me that by applying for her unconventional grant. “I still want to be a journalist, even if things don’t work out at the school paper. This way I can still get experience for college applications. Hopefully I can find some papers that will take me.” Closing one door didn’t mean I was out of windows, after all. I’d thought that before, with Vince, and look where that had gotten me.
“You’ll get in. You’ll be amazing,” he said, pulling me close. “I even promise to read your articles.”
We gently swayed to the music, and I let all other thoughts go.
For the first time in weeks, everything felt right.
“Want to know a secret?” Logan whispered in my ear. I nodded against his chest, not wanting to put any distance between us. My mom would have said we were dancing too close, but to me, it felt perfect. “You’re my favorite,” he said. His breath tickled my cheek, and I looked up to see his chocolate eyes soaking me in.
“Your favorite what?” I asked.
“Everything. You’re my favorite everything.”
I reached up and put my arms around his neck, bringing his head close to mine. Then I kissed him. Again. Because I could.
acknowledgments
I’d like to bear-hug everyone who helped make this book a reality. But since that would be super awkward, I’ll settle with thanking them here.
First of all, thank you to my publisher, Swoon Reads, for believing in my book even when it was a hot mess. Jean Feiwel, you took a chance on me, and I’ll be forever grateful. It’s changed my life in the best of ways.
My editor, Kat Brzozowski, who had the vision to take the rags of my book and turn it into a beautiful ball gown. This Cinderella wouldn’t have been possible without you. (No, seriously. Not. Possible.)