by Diana Nixon
I didn't know what to say. Everything was so fucked up.
"I can't even begin to imagine the day Eden remembers her sister…"
Mia came closer and rubbed my shoulders gently. "But you will still love her, won't you?"
"Of course, I will."
"Then you'll find a way to help her get through it."
CHAPTER 17
I desperately wanted to become a kid again. With no problems, no worries, just games, laughter and friends who never lied to me.
After my conversation with Mia, she told Ian she had a headache and he took her home.
Eden knew I was stressed out, she could see it all over my face. Fortunately, she didn't know anything about the origins of my sucky mood.
"Will you stay in my room tonight?" She asked, as we walked up the stairs.
"I will, because I can't imagine spending a night without you." I placed a kiss on her lips and wrapped my arm tightly around her.
I was so close to losing her, I secretly prayed for her memories to never come back. Guilty. But true.
I knew she, of all people, would suffer a lot if she knew the truth about Rachel and her final will. Even in death, Rachel still controlled my life, including the most important part of it that was my happiness with Eden.
We came to Ariel's room to kiss her good night. She was still awake, but very sleepy. Reggie was sitting on her bed, half asleep too.
"You can go," Eden whispered to her.
But Reggie's eyes were not on her, but on me. She knew something happened.
Eden kissed Ariel's cheek and whispered something into her ear. The girl nodded and smiled slightly. I also gave her a kiss and then we left her room, turning the lights off.
"Are you okay, Blake?" Reggie asked once we were out in the hall.
"Yes," was my short response.
"He quarreled with Mia," Eden added and Reggie's face paled. She knew there was only thing that could make me feel and look like a ghost. But I didn't want to discuss it all over again.
"Good night, Reggie," I said before I went into Eden's room, not even for a second thinking about the conspiracy. Though with my nanny, it was not needed anymore. She knew everything, which also turned out to be a lot more than I did.
***
Days flew by and I felt as wrecked as ever. Nothing seemed to be good enough to make me switch my thoughts from the worst and help me breathe freely again.
Even Ariel noticed that I wasn't myself anymore. She thought I wasn't feeling well, but I assured her it had nothing to do with my health. Since she lost her mom, she had this fear of losing me as well. She never told me about it, but Reggie said she once told her she was scared I would die and she would be all alone, again.
Her meetings with Mason became more often and once or twice I even let them leave the house without Eden, who said it was for the best and Ariel didn't mind spending more time with her father. With everything I now knew about Rachel's last days of life, my hate for Mason didn't seem to be so important anymore.
Mia and I didn't talk much since the night she left my house all in tears. She called just a few times to ask if everything was all right, including my relationship with Eden. I knew she was worried about me, but in light of recent events, I preferred to keep some distance between us.
Today was Eden's birthday and she and I were in San Francisco for the weekend. Thanks to Ian, I knew she always wanted to see The Golden Gate Bridge and the trip was my present for her.
"I wish I could make time stop moving," I said, holding her in my embrace. It was almost 11:00 AM and we were still in bed. Our flight was six hours away from now so we had plenty of time to enjoy the intimacy of our last day in the city.
"Why? Don't you want to see what's waiting for us in the future?" I was surprised to hear her say it, because I was sure she was scared to face her future as I was to know that she wouldn't share it with me.
"Only if it's something good."
She broke free from my arms and sat up in the bed. "Will you finally tell me what's going on with you?"
I was so terrible in pretending it was nothing, and that I was too stressed about work. But she could feel me so well; I wish I could tell her the truth. But it was just that scary, my tongue wouldn't move to say a word.
"I thought we were done with it," she said.
"Done with what?"
"Waiting for the day my heart stops beating."
"Oh, baby… It's not about your heart." I lied, again. Her heart, as well as its original owner, made a huge part of the story that I didn't want to tell her.
"Then what is it? One second you seem to be okay, then next second it's like the lights on your face fade away and you become so quiet and thoughtful, sad even."
I didn't know how to explain this without giving away the things that she was not supposed to know. A part of me hoped I would never have to tell her anything. Unless she wanted to know the missing piece of the story her memories would tell her one day.
"Forget it, really. I don't want to end this weekend talking about my mood."
"Blake, I'm not blind. I know something's bothering you and if it's not my health, then what is it?"
"The fact that you refuse to move into my room. I'm kind of tired of waiting for Ariel to fall asleep so I can sneak into yours."
She giggled. "I'm being serious now."
"Same here. When are you going to move your things into my room?"
"Soon."
"How soon?"
"Next year."
"That's in two days."
"I know. I want the move to be my present for you. I also hope Ariel will like the news. She's used to sleeping right behind the wall from me."
"I'll ask Reggie to move into your room so that Ariel doesn’t feel alone."
"Good idea. Make sure you have enough space for my things in your wardrobe."
"If needed, I'll keep mine at the balcony."
***
Eden
The flight back to New York wasn't supposed to last long, but to me it was the longest flight ever…
Shortly after we got on board and the plane took off the ground, I fell asleep and saw another dream that made me dive into my lost childhood again…
I knew this place, I knew this bench I was sitting on.
"You stay here and wait for me," someone told me. I looked at the girl standing next to the bench. She was a couple of years older than me. She was wearing a white sleeveless dress, her long brown hair was made in a ponytail. She took a few coins from her valet, put a bag with the groceries next to me and went to the shop. I turned my head to the right and watched her leave.
Fear ran up my spine.
She never left me alone, I thought to myself. What if she never comes back? Maybe I shouldn't have asked her to buy me a candy.
"You're alone here, doll?" Two men stood behind the bench. They looked around as if searching for something.
"No, I'm here with my sister."
"Where is she?" One of them asked.
"She went to buy me candy."
They looked at each other and laughed.
"I have many candies in my car. A whole store. Wanna see them?"
I knew I shouldn't talk to strangers, or go with them.
"No. I'll wait for my sister to bring me one."
"Look!" The other one said. "What a beautiful kitten!"
"Where?" My eyes searched for the kitten. I loved kittens.
"Over there! Behind that red car on the opposite side of the road."
"I don't see cats there." I stood up and frowned. Maybe it was because the sun was shining so brightly, it blinded my vision.
"There it is, little furry ball." One of the men walked around the bench and put his hand on my shoulder. He pushed me slightly to the road.
"There's no cat there," I said stubbornly.
"Oh, trust me, it is there," the other man said. Then he swept me in his arms and carried me to the car parked nearby. I wanted to scream for help but the man
covered my mouth with his palm. "Hurry up!" He said to his companion.
He opened the back door of his car and pushed me onto the back seat. Then they quickly got into the car and locked the doors so I wouldn't run away.
"Rachel!" I screamed, trying to open the back door. The car started to move.
"Shut up!" The man who was sitting behind the wheel said.
"Rachel!" I screamed even louder. A woman who was passing by the car heard me. She turned her head and looked right at me. Pure terror froze in her eyes. She knew something really bad was happening.
"Fuck! The old bitch is calling for help." The man sitting in the passenger seat said, looking out of the window. "She saw our car, she'll tell the police we kidnapped the girl!"
"We need to stop," the driver said.
"Yeah…" The other one agreed and looked at me angrily. "Stupid girl!"
The car stopped abruptly and the driver pulled me out of it.
I fell down to my knees and cried. The car sped away from me.
I got up to my feet and looked around. The woman who saved me, was now running up to me.
My knees hurt. I looked down and saw blood running down my legs. I was hurt and the pain was stronger than me.
"Watch out!" The woman screamed, pointing at something behind me.
I slowly turned my head and saw the very car I was in just a few moments ago, run straight at me.
Then it hit me, hard.
And then, there was nothing. Nothing at all. Only the darkness….
"Eden! Eden, wake up!"
I opened my eyes and saw Blake leaning over me.
"What happened?" I asked.
"You had a nightmare. You screamed for help."
"Did I?" I tried to remember anything from what made me scream in my sleep. "Did I mention someone's name?"
He shook his head. "No. Why?"
"Forget it. It was just a dream."
"A very bad dream." Blake sat down and took my hand in his.
I looked at him as a very unpleasant feeling crept up my chest.
Rachel…
It was her name I screamed in my dream.
But why? Why would I be screaming the name of someone I didn't even know? Or maybe the girl from my dream had the same name as Ariel's mom did?
It was hard to believe it was just a weird coincidence. But I clearly remembered calling for Rachel's help. As well as the fact that I called her my sister…
I leaned against the back of my seat and looked out of the window; my heart was beating fast in my chest.
By the time we got home, it was almost midnight and everyone, except Reggie who had been waiting for us to be back, was asleep.
"How was the trip?" She asked, taking my bag.
"It was great. How's Ariel?"
"Good. She spent the whole day drawing a picture for you. She wanted to wait for your arrival, but I told her it would be late at night and she agreed to give you the picture in the morning."
I smiled, feeling like the tension left after the damn nightmare was starting to leave my body.
"Would you like a cup of tea or something else?"
I shook my head, too tired for anything but a good dose of peaceful sleep.
"No, thank you Reggie," Blake said. "We'd better go to bed. I don't want to be late for work tomorrow. It's gonna be another long week for me."
"Okay. Good night then."
"Night, Reggie," Blake and I said in unison.
"You haven't said a word since we got off the plane. Are you okay?"
"Yes."
It was the only thing I said that night. After we got to my room and went to bed, Blake didn't torture me with his questions anymore, probably knowing I didn't want to answer them. He fell asleep, holding me in his arms, but I couldn't make myself close my eyes.
The dream I had on the plane was still too vivid in my head. I kept recalling the details, and the more I remembered, the better I knew it was not just a dream, but a memory.
Pieces of other memories started to flood my mind, one by one, like a river that finally found its way out of the banks.
I remembered one of my birthdays. It was before the Sheltons adopted me. Because everything around me was different, including my room. It was much smaller and it had a two-tier bed with blue handmade blankets and matching pillows on each tier.
"You are so grown-up, my girl…" Mom said, embracing me. I don't know how, but I knew it was my mom. Though I could hardly remember her face. But I knew the voice belonged to her.
"Time flies…" My dad said. He walked into the room, holding hands with the same girl who was with me at the market.
"Happy birthday, sis," she said, giving me a small box.
"What's this?" I asked.
"Open it," mom said.
I opened the box and my eyes went wide. "Wow…it's so beautiful!" I took out a silver chain with a half-heart medallion hanging on it.
"I have the same one," my sister said. "Look." She put her medallion to mine and they formed a heart. "One heart for two. So we could always be together, no matter what."
I could so clearly remember those words of hers, I couldn't believe I didn't remember them before. As well as I couldn't believe I didn't remember anyone from my family, including my sister who, judging by how much love radiated from her words, was supposed to be an essential part of my memories.
Rachel…
Her name was Rachel. Now I knew it wasn't just a trick of my imagination.
I had a sister whose name was Rachel and I think I knew where I could get the missing parts of the puzzle I had been trying to put together in my head for so long…
CHAPTER 18
When morning came, I quickly got dressed while Blake was still asleep and went downstairs to take my medicine. I also made myself a cup of coffee and then went to check on Ariel.
To my surprise, she was wide awake, reading a storybook that her mom once gave her. It was her favorite one.
"Morning," she said, putting down the book.
"Why are you awake so early?" I came to the bed, put my coffee mug on the bedside table and sat down next to Ari.
"Couldn't sleep."
She looked a little sad and I wondered if it had anything to do with me.
"Have you missed me?" I asked, wrapping one arm around her.
"I have…" She didn't look at me and it was weird.
"What's the matter, Ari?" I touched her forehead, hoping she wasn't fevering. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm fine."
"Then why are you so sad?"
Finally, she looked at me with a long thoughtful look. "You will always be with me, won't you, Eden?"
"Of course, I will. Why?"
"I had a bad dream… I saw you leave the house and I knew you would never come back."
"It was just a dream, Ari."
"Blake and I want you stay with us, forever."
"Blake and you?"
She smiled. "You think I don't know you are dating him?"
"Who told you that?"
She gave me a very cute look, like 'Isn't it obvious'?
"He loves you, Eden. I know he does. But what about you? Do you love him too?"
I couldn't lie about it. "I do."
"Does this mean you will get married?"
"Well… We don't want to rush things."
"I see…" She held me tight and said, "I love you too, Eden. Promise you will stay. I don't want to lose you."
Oh, the little girl knew how to make my heart bleed harder.
"You will never lose me, Ari, I promise." It wasn't quite the same promise she wanted me to give her, but it was the only promise I could give her now.
"I have something for you," she said. She went to her vanity table, opened one of the drawers and pulled out the box that Mia gave her the very night she and Ian came to have dinner with us. "I didn't know what present to give you for your birthday, but then I remembered about this." She gave me the box and added, "It belonged to my mom. But now I wan
t you to have it."
With my shaking hands, I opened the box and gasped.
"Let's pretend the other half of this silver heart is inside me," she said, taking out the chain. She then fastened it around my neck and smiled. "Perfect."
I stared at her with my eyes full of tears. I was speechless and scared.
Scared to believe my assumptions were correct and that everything that happened after I started working for Blake wasn't just a lucky chance. It was for a reason…
"You don't like it?" Ariel asked.
I swallowed sudden tears. "I love it."
"Then why are you crying?"
I shook my head and forced a smile. "I'm not." Then I touched the medallion and added in a whisper, "Thank you. It's a lovely present."
"If you wear it, you will always remember me."
I nodded and stood up, afraid I would break into tears and scare Ariel even more.
"I need to do something very important today. Do you mind staying with Reggie for a couple of hours?"
"Don't worry, I'll be fine." She sent me an air kiss and I left the room, barely able to breathe.
God, I needed to get out of there. The sooner, the better.
I went back to my room, but the bed was empty and Blake was nowhere around.
I came to my bedside table and pulled out a box with my jewels. Because inside there was something that I knew was the key to all the doors that had been locked for me, for years.
I took out a silver chain with a half-heart medallion, came to the mirror and put it to the one Ariel gave me just a few minutes ago.
They were a perfect match. Two parts of one heart that were finally complete…
Oh, Rachel…
I should have known it was you when Ariel showed me your picture. I should have felt the connection. But my memories were hidden so deep in my mind, I couldn't see the obvious.
She and I were like mirror reflections, with just a-few-year age difference.
I swept tears running down my cheeks, took a deep breath and locked the other chain around my neck, so that now the two pieces were inseparable.