Valon: What Once Was (Volkov Bratva Book 0)

by London Miller

  Even when Bastian asked something of Valon that Fatos wanted, he took it in stride. But let it be anyone else, and Fatos made them pay.

  But because Valon was loyal to those he considered his friends, he turned his back on Fatos’ actions. After all, he had someone to look after.

  Since the night of her waking him up, things hadn’t changed much between them, but she did, at least, make eye contact with him, and spoke to him, even if it was to only say ‘thanks’ for the food he brought her.

  “What are you doing, brother?” Fatos asked as he watched Valon pull a plate down from the cabinets, pulling the contents out of the refrigerator to make a sandwich.

  Valon just glanced at him, letting his actions do all the speaking.

  “Is that for the girl?”

  “If it is?”

  He frowned. “Since when did you start caring about the girl?”

  Valon, still focused on his task, said, “I never said I cared.”

  Fatos held his hands up. “I merely ask…if you are too busy, I won’t bother you.”

  Irritated, he finally gave in, knowing that Fatos would keep bothering him until he had a conversation with him. Sometimes he forgot how needy he could be. “What’s doing, Fatos?”

  “Xavien is gone.”

  Valon racked his brain, trying to remember where he had heard that name, and then it clicked. Since he had grown so used to think of Xavien as Gjarper, he had actually forgotten the man’s real name.

  “Oh? Where is he? For a moment, he feared the worst, thinking his mentor had been killed for a transgression that he didn’t know about.

  “On assignment with my father. It’s doubtful he’ll be coming back for a while.”

  At least one of them could get out of this shithole, Valon thought. While he wasn’t sure what the assignment was exactly, it had to be better than waiting on Bastian hand and foot. Good for him.

  “Okay.”

  Slapping some meat between the bread, Valon took it and a bottle of water, leaving Fatos staring after him. He didn’t notice the way Fatos’ eyes lit with a dangerous fire.

  Elena was just exiting the bathroom as Valon reentered. She hesitated a moment, and then gave him a small smile that made him look away. It wasn’t embarrassment that made him do it.

  At least that was what he told himself.

  “Thought you might be hungry.”

  “What about you?”

  He blinked, looking back at her as she crossed the floor to sit beside him. “What about me?”

  “Well, aren’t you going to eat, too?”

  He forced the plate into her hands, dropping the bottle of water onto her lap. “I’m not hungry.”

  He didn’t know what to make of her. Besides her first few nights, she didn’t seem to fear him, not even when he’d come into the room covered in blood, or like the other night when he’d nearly choked her to death. She just seemed to take it all in stride.

  “If you say so.”

  She carefully took a bite of the sandwich, smiling shyly at him when he looked at her. Since she seemed to be more receptive—or maybe because he wasn’t glaring at her—he decided to try to appease his curiosity.

  “Can I ask you a question?”

  She chewed some more, swallowing before nodding. “Sure.”

  “Where are you from? I don’t think I’ve seen you here before.” He thought he would have remembered someone like her.

  Clearing her throat, she stared down at the sandwich thoughtfully. “I don’t know…or at least I don’t know where I was born. When I was nine, my parents died in a car accident, and I was sent to an orphanage. When I was sixteen, I left, thinking I could make it on my own.” She sipped the water, looking uncomfortable as she discussed a past she probably didn’t want to reveal to him. “I met a man who promised to take care of me, pay for anything I wanted, if I did a little work for him.”

  “What did you need to do?” Valon asked, then immediately regretted it when he realized what she meant a moment later. “You don’t—”

  “No, it’s okay. He wanted me to sleep with some of his friends first. That was my test, to see how I performed. When I…passed…he made me one of his girls. It wasn’t so bad,” she said as she read the look on his face. “He was never terribly cruel to me. It was only when I was short on money that he ever hurt me.”

  “And Bastian? How did he find you?”

  “Trenton, that was his name, he owed Bastian a debt. I fulfilled it.”

  Valon nodded, leaning his head back against the wall as he digested everything she had told him. It made him think of his mother and what her life must have been like before she was bought by Ahmeti and brought here. Was it better there? Had she been happy?

  Elena, misunderstanding his silence, looked down at the plate she had now set on the floor. “Do you think less of me now?”

  He wondered whether she thought if he did think less of her, would he treat her differently. Would he become cruel like the others and start calling her a whore because that was what she was…

  Truthfully, he didn’t care about any of that. Even if she had been an innocent, he would still never hurt her. If anything, this would only make him treat her better.

  “No,” he answered honestly.

  “Thanks.”

  But she shouldn’t have to express her gratitude for that. He was only being a decent human being.

  “And you?”

  Shaking his head, he laughed without humor before telling her a condensed and clean version of how he had come to be in this place. She listened intently, never taking her eyes off him until he had finished.

  If anything, that seemed to make her pity him.

  “I’m sorry about your mother. It sounds like she meant the world to you.”

  And she had. That was why, shortly after he had come here and gained enough freedom that he could walk the property without being followed, he’d taken her combs and wrapped them in a spare strip of cloth he’d found in the barn.

  In the dead of night, he had ventured from his bed into the woods behind the house, letting the light of the moon guide him until he was deep enough that he felt they would be left unfound. Though no one had tended to bother his things at that time, he still didn’t trust how long that would last. He was spending too much time running errands for Bastian to watch over them.

  When he had found a rather secluded area, he had crouched beside the thick trunk of the tree, digging into the hardened earth with desperate fingers until he had made a significant hole. He had had some time before anyone would be looking for him, so he had taken advantage of that.

  On his knees, he took a second to unwrap the folds, taking a moment to peer at the jewel-colored combs with their incredible designs. He had almost been too afraid to let them go, knowing what these had once meant to his mother and now to him. Despite having given up everything else from his former life, he hadn’t wanted to give those up, too.

  Not yet.

  Down they went into the hole, and then he covered them in dirt until there was nothing left to see.

  At the time, and even now, he didn’t know whether he would ever return for them, but he hoped…One day, he hoped.

  “Yes,” Valon answered after some time. “She was.”

  “Thank you.”

  He looked at her, confused. “Why do you say this?”

  “You trusted me with something that I doubt you’ve told anyone else. So, thank you.”

  Though the action felt foreign and out of place, Valon smiled.

  ____

  From that day on, things had shifted between them.

  She was less of a pet and more of an…ally?

  Valon wasn’t quite sure what to call her, but he knew one thing. He was glad to have her in his life. Now that she was there, he didn’t feel that same grueling pressure at the end of the night when he left the Pit. He actually looked forward to returning to his room. Even if it was just for a few short hours every night, she helped him for
get the Pit and the demands Bastian put on him. And in return, she gave him her undivided attention.

  No one bothered her now that it seemed he had taken more of an interest in her, and the one time that Strom thought to harass her while Valon was busy in the Pit, Valon made sure to teach him yet another lesson on why that was not a good idea.

  Time slipped by as they grew closer, and before Valon realized it, that first awkward week between them had turned into six weeks, and they were closer than he could have ever thought they would be.

  No one else seemed to mind how Valon had changed since he had developed a relationship with her. To them, he was no longer a ticking time bomb. Now, he was a bit more friendly and no longer looked like he was ready to murder them at the slightest provocation.

  Everyone, that was, except for Fatos.

  He seemed to grow more agitated the longer she stayed around and the more attention Valon gave her.

  But like he always did, he ignored Fatos’ agitation, dismissing it as he always had.

  One night, after a fight, Fatos was waiting for him at the side of the ring.

  “How about we celebrate your victory,” he offered with a wide smile.

  Valon glanced over at Bastian who was laughing and joking with a man who was handing over a large stack of money. When he looked over, Bastian nodded, interrupting the man as he rudely walked off and came over.

  “Good work, boy. Maybe I should have given you pussy long before now, yes? You would have performed better.”

  He laughed at his own joke, but both Valon and Fatos remained silent, watching him walk off again.

  “What do you say?”

  “I’m busy,” Valon said as he turned his back on his friend. “I’ll see you—”

  “What is it that has you so enthralled with that whore?” Fatos spat out.

  Before the consequences even crossed his mind, Valon swung at him, hitting him square in the face. Fatos didn’t go down, but his head did jerk to the side with the force of his punch.

  Valon instantly regretted it, but it was too late to do anything about it, and he wouldn’t offer an apology he didn’t mean.

  He had always hated that word, whore, and more than anyone else, Fatos knew this.

  “Back off,” he warned him. The only warning he would ever give.

  He was conscious of the attention that he was now getting, but he ignored the lot of them as he headed for the house. No one stood in his way, and when he reached his room, he closed and locked the door.

  “Valon?”

  Ignoring Elena until he could get his anger under control, he disappeared into the bathroom, turning on the shower, listening to the old pipes rattle as water began to spurt out.

  He calmed the worst of his agitation beneath the spray of water, washing the night away. By the time he got out, he was far calmer. Dressing quickly, he headed back into the bedroom, ready to apologize to Elena, but there was no need. She didn’t look upset with him.

  Sometimes, during moments like these, he remembered that she was too good for someone like him, someone who had his penchant for violence. Maybe one day he could offer her more than this.

  “Valon…”

  She touched him, startling him to the point that he jumped, looking over at her sharply, but she merely held her hands up like she wanted to appease him…make sure he knew that she wasn’t trying to hurt him like so many others had.

  Shame and embarrassment filled him as he sat with her, seeing the surprise in her eyes. But pity didn’t follow. When she reached for him, he grabbed hold of her hand before she could touch him, but didn’t move it away.

  “Has no one ever touched you with kindness?”

  For a moment, thoughts of his mother came to mind, but they were gone just as quickly. Maybe if he tried hard enough, he could conjure a memory of what it had felt like to be around her, how it had felt when she’d brushed his hair.

  Valon shook his head. “Not in a very long time.”

  She just stared at him for some time until she seemed to reach a conclusion. Carefully, she stretched out her hands, making sure he was watching her the entire time as she cradled his face, moving closer so that they were only a breath apart.

  A fraction of a moment passed as he considered what she was about to do, but he was careful to keep himself still, the muscles in his arms flexing as he resisted the urge to touch her in return. Not sure of what she planned, he didn’t want to risk hurting her.

  Very gently, almost as if she was nervous for this, Elena pressed her lips to his, only to pull away a second later. It was short, tentative, but in that one second, he felt more than he could have ever dreamed.

  He felt that kiss in every part of his being, and even if he had never been kissed before, he knew that this was different from anything he had ever experienced. This wasn’t about aggression or taking something that wasn’t offered.

  “That was okay, yes?”

  Valon nodded, rubbing a hand over his shaved head. Truthfully, he wanted more, but was too afraid to ask for it.

  But she read his desires like they were his own and kissed him again. This time, it was more languid, and as he attempted to mimic her movements, the kiss grew deeper until they were clinging to each other, sharp breaths leaving them.

  When she rocked against him, he hissed, one hand immediately dropping to the curve of her hip, wanting her to repeat the motion, but she broke away from him, staring into his eyes.

  Valon deflated. He worried that he might have done something she didn’t like, or worse…

  “Are you afraid of me?” Valon asked carefully.

  For once, he didn’t want someone’s fear, not like in the Pit when he was fighting for his life. He wouldn’t go as far as to say he wanted someone to be happy to see him, but maybe someone who didn’t feel the need to recoil when he entered the room or wary in his presence.

  …Just someone who would make him feel less alone in a house full of people.

  He wanted her to want him as he did her, not because she was scared of what he might do otherwise.

  “Of course not, Valon,” she whispered as she came closer. “There’s nothing about you that scares me. Not anymore. They’d warned me about you, when they took me from the house with the other girls. They said you were a monster, and you got off on the pain you put others through, so you wouldn’t hesitate to hurt me.”

  She cradled his face, kissing him lightly. “But you have only ever been good to me. And I want to give you something in return.”

  When she pressed her lips to his this time, he didn’t pull away, no longer wanting to resist what she was offering.

  Valon didn’t feel as confident here as he did when he entered the Pit. This was uncharted territory for him. But he was willing to learn.

  Her hands slipped beneath his shirt, her fingers skimming over his chest, her nails dragging along the contours and lines. A heavy breath left him as he gave himself over to something that wasn’t pain.

  Lifting his arms, he helped her get his shirt off, tossing it in a corner of his room. He was usually a stickler for having things in their place, but at the moment, he couldn’t care less about that.

  While she was bold in her exploration of him, he was careful as he touched her in return, too afraid of hurting her to do much more than leave his hands at her waist. These hands were bred to only give the maximum amount of force possible. How was he to know what was too much, and what wasn’t enough?

  “It’s okay, Valon,” she whispered against his lips as she pulled away. “You can touch me.”

  He licked his lips. “I don’t…I don’t know how.”

  She didn’t laugh, nor did she make fun of him, but instead, she held his hands with her own, showing him exactly what to do.

  Each article of clothing they wore came off, one by one, until there was nothing between them.

  He was careful as he caressed her skin, listening to the breathy moans she let out, using that as an indication of what she liked. Ad
renaline was coursing through him, making him far more aware of what was happening.

  Elena reached between them, lifting up as she guided him inside of her.

  “Don’t worry,” she said with a smile on her lips. “I won’t hurt you.”

  -

  11

  ______

  Fatos stood off to the side, arms folded across his chest as he watched Valon, once a friend and the only person who Fatos truly cared for, stand over the boy he’d just defeated, his hands bloody, the rest of him with matching splatters.

  The men of their organization cheered. It was more money earned for them.

  Fatos couldn’t care less about this, but he did care that his work, the work he had been doing for the better part of two years was being overlooked. But that was only because Valon was making strides to belong in their world. He could ignore his own ambitions for a while, just so that his friend could prosper.

  That was just the type of person he was.

  He had done everything in his power to make Valon’s life enjoyable here ever since he’d learned what happened to his parents. Did he ask for anything in return? No. But Valon could have at least given him his loyalty, but the moment a pretty little distraction came forward, Valon acted as though Fatos didn’t exist.

  Fatos might have considered letting the transgression go, if not for the fact that he was forced to see her every time he attempted to see his friend. Fatos didn’t mind Valon having a pet, if only that pet knew its place.

  His friend was too nice, Fatos decided as he watched him get ready for the fight. If he couldn’t do what needed to be done to make sure that she knew her place here—which was nothing more than a glorified hole to be filled whenever someone felt like it—then he would make it his duty to show her exactly what that meant.

  Turning on his heel, Fatos headed back to the house, leaving the screaming, clamoring men who had nothing better to do than watch someone beat another to death behind, ignoring the curious glances he received in return. It was rare that he ever ventured away from Valon’s fights. The only time he’d avoided them was when Valon was first put in there with those animals. He might not have been able to do anything about it then, but he had enjoyed, probably more than the others, when Valon bashed his skull in.