Completely Smitten

by Susan Mallery

  “Sure.” Anything to get away from the sexy man sitting next to her, confusing her so much that white-jacketed men with butterfly nets couldn’t be too far off in her future. But this time, she was going to use the opportunity to set Charlie straight.

  Thankfully, the band was playing a fast song, which allowed her to move constantly and not get too close to him.

  He licked his lips nervously. “Piper, I’ve realized nothing I say is going to convince you that we belong together. So I’m not going to try to convince you with words.” He stopped suddenly, leaning in.

  She realized with a sort of detached horror that he was lowering his head to kiss her. The only man I want kissing me is Josh Weber. Even though Daphne had tried to warn her, the truth was so forceful that for a moment Piper couldn’t move. I love him. I’m in love with Josh.

  “Stop!” Belatedly mobilizing herself, she shoved Charlie away. “Enough is enough. I didn’t want to have to be rude about this because we’re old friends, but I don’t want you. You don’t want me, either. You want the perfect Rebecca housewife next to you during your mayoral campaigns.”

  “That’s not true,” he protested. He rocked back on his heels, running a hand through his blond hair. “I’ll admit, maybe it was at one time. I did try to change you, but I’m older now, Piper. Smarter. I know what I lost. I’ve had plenty of time to find ‘the perfect Rebecca housewife,’ but that’s not what I want.”

  Unfortunately, we don’t always get what we want. “I’m with Josh now.” She’d repeated that sentence, or variations thereof, so many times this weekend. Only this time did the irony bite her on the ass. She wasn’t with Josh, but she wanted to be.

  Charlie regarded her for a long moment. “You care that much about him?”

  Lord help her, she did. She’d always imagined that love made a woman less, somehow, but thinking about all the times she’d spent with Josh, she realized he made her feel more. More confident when they discussed work, more attractive when he flirted with her, more powerful when she felt him respond to her kiss. Happier, sexier, even angrier. But never diminished in any way.

  “Never mind,” Charlie said. “I can see the answer in your expression. But are you sure he’s the type who will stick around? I got the impression… Can he give you what you want, Piper?”

  She decided to treat the question as rhetorical, since she was certain the answer was no. “Charlie, I’m sorry.”

  He didn’t say anything when she turned and made her way back to Daphne. Josh was talking to Blaine and Donald about baseball, and Piper scooched onto the bench seat with her sister, her voice a dazed whisper.

  “Daph? You were right. I am in love with him.”

  Daphne fluffed her dark hair. “I always was the smart one. Piper, every time you call me, we end up talking about Josh. And with the way you smile at him, it’s so obvious.”

  “How obvious?” Her heart pounded against her chest. “Do you think he knows?” Even Charlie had said her emotions were evident in her expression.

  “No, men are clueless,” Daphne assured her. “When it pertains to them, they’re always the last to know. But you should tell him.”

  Piper sneaked a glance in his direction. The sight of him made her heart flip-flop, and she wondered if it would ever be possible to get tired of looking at him. “Tell Josh? Are you kidding? The only person in the Lone Star State more antirelationship than me?”

  “I don’t think of you as antirelationship, Piper. You just hadn’t found the right guy to have a relationship with yet.”

  Piper had to admit that her views about couples and love had certainly been changing over the last few days. Still, she wasn’t entirely at peace with the idea of a man taking a major role in her life again, not yet. “Daphne, if I tell you something, promise not to get mad at me?” The last thing Piper wanted was a hostile exchange like the one they’d had at the bridal shop.

  Daphne waited, having had too many years’ experiences as a sister to agree to a blanket promise.

  Piper sighed, grateful for the thumping music of the live band that helped keep their conversation private. “You’ve said before that I don’t want to turn out like Mom, and you’re right. I respect her, and I’ll admit she seems happy, but I couldn’t be happy with her life.”

  “So who asked you to be? Falling in love doesn’t need to change you into Mom or anyone els—”

  “I thought it changed you.”

  “What?”

  “Well, when we were growing up, you didn’t sound as though you wanted to be a Rebecca housewife, either. You talked about being an artist or a politician or traveling. Then you gave it all up because of Blaine.”

  Instead of sounding offended, Daphne surprised her by laughing. “Piper, you took off to college when you were seventeen, and I’m almost four years younger than you. Sure, I wanted to be an artist at one time. If you’ll recall, I also once wanted to be an astronaut. And I think you missed the year I wanted to start my own all-girl band. Blaine didn’t change me, I just grew up, figured out what I wanted.”

  Piper blinked, thinking of all the times their father had expressed an opinion to which their mother had immediately agreed. Piper had imagined that Blaine and Daphne’s relationship was similar. “You’re not unhappy?”

  “Do I look unhappy, you twit?” Daphne chuckled again. “Once I took some college courses, I realized teaching is my calling. I love making a difference to these kids. Plus I get summers off,” she added with a teasing grin.

  Piper felt confused all over again. “Then why are you talking about quitting teaching?”

  “I don’t plan to stop forever, just maybe take some time off while the babies are young. But even if I do turn over my classroom for a year or two, I’ll still work occasionally as a sub and stay in touch that way.”

  “So Blaine isn’t trying to turn you into some throwback from the ’50s.” Piper felt about six types of stupid. She’d jumped to conclusions about her brother-in-law just because of the way Charlie had once tried to change her.

  “Are you serious? Blaine likes our being a dual-income family, trust me. Piper, I don’t know how you see my marriage, but if I still wanted to get into politics, my husband would personally organize my campaign against Charlie. And as for wanting to travel, we plan to, once the kids are a little older. He’s not holding me back.”

  Piper bit her lip, afraid to open her mouth again and stick her foot any farther down her throat. Leather sandals might be great for showing off the toenails she’d painted earlier, but they made lousy snack food.

  Daphne shook her head. “Mom does a lot for Dad, and you’ve always thought that made him some kind of chauvinist. I’m the first to admit that some of the people in this town are a little old-fashioned, but I think your view of our parents is skewed. Mom loves to cook and do things around the house. It’s her domain, and she insists on controlling it. She’s like you—she likes to do things her way.”

  Piper and her mother were alike?

  “She’s pushy and stubborn, but Dad’s crazy about her. Half the time when she goes along with him, it’s because ‘his’ idea was hers in the first place. You think it was Dad’s choice to spend yesterday at a bridal-and-baby shower?” Daphne smiled. “Or Blaine’s idea to spend tomorrow shopping? You had a bad experience with Charlie, but that’s not Dad’s or Blaine’s fault. Or Josh’s. Tell him how you feel.”

  Fear crowded Piper’s chest, tightening her lungs. “I get that you’re trying to help, but trust me, keeping this to myself is for the best. I know Josh. I understand him.” And she understood he was unwilling to form any deep emotional attachments that might make him vulnerable.

  Daphne arched an eyebrow. “Well, let’s just hope you understand him better than you ‘understood’ my marriage.”

  Josh lay on his side, staring at the avocado-and-gold-paisley wallpaper illuminated by the streetlight spilling through his window. He could always pull the curtains shut, but the light outside wasn’t what kep
t him awake. Thoughts of Piper were torturing him.

  Probably just the proximity of her being curled up in bed on the other side of this wall.

  Ha! She could move to Canada and he’d still be aware of her. And to be honest, it wasn’t the hotel wall that separated them.

  What was happening? First they’d snapped at each other earlier this evening, then she’d been so quiet on the ride back to the hotel. She’d been strangely contemplative ever since her second dance with Charlie Conway, and it made Josh uneasy. Was that why he hadn’t asked what was on her mind on the return drive—fear that she was thinking about Charlie? He’d seen changes in her this weekend, despite her comments about staying single. She wouldn’t reconsider Charlie’s offer, would she? The mayor was downright irritating…but also apparently loyal, a more than capable provider, perhaps appealing to women and with family roots that went deep into the town’s history.

  She’d be miserable here. Wouldn’t she? He felt as if he couldn’t predict Piper as easily as he once had. Not that she’d ever been completely predictable. Banishing all nightmare-inducing thoughts of her back with Charlie, Josh stared harder at the wallpaper. Still 118 ugly swirling paisleys, same as the last four times he’d counted.

  When that blonde in the bar—Rose? Robin?—had flirted with him, he’d smiled the way he normally would when an attractive woman was showing interest in him. But he’d been on autopilot, not really seeing her, attuned instead to Piper in her ex-boyfriend’s arms. Charlie wasn’t right for her.

  But Josh wasn’t right for her, either. From his business practices to his dating life, he’d remained more or less a loner, keeping his contact with others casual and as enjoyable as possible for the limited time it existed. It wasn’t a bad life, so why rock the boat now? Why not just accept the unusual opportunity this weekend presented, and let it go at that?

  All weekend he’d been free to do what he normally wouldn’t, or couldn’t. Not just kissing Piper, but holding her hand, as he had earlier today. As long as what they did here fell under the guise of pretending for the benefit of others, he could selfishly indulge in this time with her. Dancing, kissing, teasing, even sharing her family. But if it ever became something real, beyond this weekend, he’d lose her when they broke up.

  The few women he hadn’t dumped first had left him because he was too “emotionally inaccessible.” And they were right. He’d been able to admit that, even as he hadn’t really felt their loss. Until Dana. He’d really tried, dammit. He’d wanted to be what she needed, wanted to show her how he felt about her. But he’d learned too early in life not to make himself vulnerable to others to unlearn it now. Piper deserved a man who could love her unreservedly.

  Too restless to stay in bed, he stood, absently registering the creaky groan of mattress springs at the shift in weight. He paced the small room. If his reluctance to commit was the only thing keeping them from a real chance at happiness, he might have a problem. But everything from their shared workplace to her celibate lifestyle meant friendship was the most logical relationship for them to have.

  Yet logic didn’t stop the way he’d felt when he’d watched her dance with Charlie. Logic couldn’t ease the intense desire that rocked Josh each time he kissed her. And logic certainly hadn’t helped him fall asleep hours ago instead of thinking about her all night long.

  He pictured her in the blue skirt she’d worn earlier, her legs shapely and seductive beneath. In a baseball cap, jumping up and down and whooping victory at an Astros home game. Deep in concentration as she worked, oblivious to everything but the angles and lines of her drawings. In a mischievous mood, her aquamarine eyes sparkling like the ocean. In his arms…

  Worse, she was in his heart. The truth he could no longer ignore was that he’d have to be an idiot not to want Piper.

  But allowing himself to act on that would just mean more pain when it was over. Why let someone in when he’d still be alone in the end?

  The words Piper had spoken blew through his mind like a cold, hostile wind. “You give the illusion of going from one relationship to the next, but you don’t let people get close to you, so you’re actually more alone than I am.”

  He was worried about being alone in the end?

  “I’m alone now.”

  The truth dawned unpleasantly, shedding light into corners of his life he’d rather not examine. He’d told himself he lived a good life, and while that might be true in some ways, it was also a hollow life.

  Piper could fill that hollowness.

  Panic immediately radiated through him. Better to ignore the emptiness than risk their friendship. But…ignoring it wasn’t working anymore.

  Admittedly, the majority of his past relationships had been meaningless. He’d designed them that way so that no one would be hurt when either party walked away. But it was Piper who consumed his thoughts now, and his feelings for her, two years in the making, weren’t shallow or easy. For the first time in his adult life, he couldn’t just pick up and walk away. So what do I do?

  Pursue a woman who scorned romantic attachments even while the thought of such an attachment still scared him?

  Well, nothing else had worked. At least this way he could maybe follow up on those kisses they’d exchanged and ease the throbbing sexual need that had him so turned around he could barely think.

  “Wow.” Josh stood in the hall outside her hotel room, his wide eyes and gaping mouth making it clear that this wasn’t his usual offhand flattery. He looked flummoxed.

  Despite Piper’s grim mood and the sleepless night she’d endured, she was happy to be responsible for the flummoxing. When she’d finally abandoned all hope of sleep and crawled out of bed a few hours ago, she’d decided she needed to look her best today. Falling in love with Josh was such a stupid thing to do that she’d needed some salve to her pride. A good hair day was about the best she could come up with on short notice.

  In a pair of snug, cowgirl-cut jeans, which she’d only packed in a fit of nostalgia, and a high-collar shirt with a peekaboo cutout above her cleavage, she felt sexy in a uniquely Texan way. And with time to kill since she’d climbed out of bed so early, she’d curled her hair so that it spilled over her shoulders in soft waves. She’d even dabbed on some makeup.

  Quite a change from the Piper of French braids and business suits. “The people at work would sure be surprised if I started showing up like this, wouldn’t they?” Despite her words, Josh’s was the only opinion she cared about.

  He grinned down at her. “You go into the office looking like this, darlin’, you won’t get anything done with all the men hanging over your desk and drooling on your blueprints.”

  The exaggerated compliment actually deflated her. He’s just being Josh. Still, as she turned to grab her purse from off the bed, she resolved to match his every teasing comment. No way would he ever guess that her heart was as cracked as a faulty foundation.

  “Maybe I’ve been too focused on work, anyway,” she drawled, walking toward him. She stepped outside the room and shut the door behind her before he had a chance to move back, forcing them to share personal space for just a second, bodies brushing. “There’s something to be said for having a good time, don’t you think?”

  Too bad the man she wanted to have that good time with was so off-limits.

  He swallowed. “Definitely. I’m all for a good time.”

  And not much else, she was afraid. Josh deserved so much more than the shallow relationships he allowed himself, but Piper couldn’t force him to accept love he didn’t want.

  Subdued, she followed him down the carpeted hall. The plan was to grab a bite to eat from the continental breakfast buffet downstairs, then meet Blaine and Daphne near the town picnic grounds, where they’d return for the reunion after shopping. On the one hand, Piper looked forward to joining the other couple, since they could help alleviate some of the tension she felt around Josh. On the other hand, being around her happily married sister and brother-in-law would sting a little, too.
Piper had always felt a twinge of pity for her sister, who’d never escaped Rebecca, but today she envied the love Daphne and her husband shared.

  Today, Piper’s pity was only for what she and Josh might have shared if circumstances were different.

  Piper studied the wooded picnic area crowded with generations of Jamiesons and their families. A group of men were gathered around a cooler of cold beverages, while some younger members of the clan played Frisbee and catch. Still others sat at the tables, looking over photo albums and exchanging news. She was sure her name was being mentioned frequently. They were probably all still shocked that she’d attended, much less brought a man with her.

  In retrospect, her lie hadn’t been worth it. It would have been easier just to tell her mom she wasn’t interested in dating than to deal with the confusion she felt now. Josh had been extra-attentive all day, his previous aversion to physical affection nowhere in evidence when he’d dropped his arm around her shoulders in the back seat of Blaine’s car. When the four of them had been shopping, Josh hadn’t come right out and said so, but she got the impression he wanted to be alone with her to talk about something. Although it was cowardly of her, she’d pretended to miss his signals, using Daphne’s and Blaine’s presence as a shield. Piper had meant what she’d told her sister—letting Josh know about her feelings was a horrible idea, the surest way to lose his friendship. Unfortunately, she wasn’t sure how long she could conceal them if she was alone with him.

  Walking next to her, Josh observed, “You have a really big family.”

  “Yep, my dad was the youngest of five kids.” She looked up in time to catch the yearning in his eyes, and felt ashamed of all the times she’d griped about her relatives. She didn’t need Josh to tell her that as a kid, he would’ve given anything for a family.

  “Come on,” she said gently, “I’ll introduce you to everyone.” They mixed and mingled among her cousins, then stopped for lemonade. As Piper turned to introduce him to more relatives, she was heralded by her great-aunt Millie.