Her Perfect

by Walls, Stephie

  I didn’t know how to ease her fears, nor did I know how I’d deal with people being anything but adoring toward her. Colbie was my world, and I’d protect her in any way I could. “You should know I won’t let that happen. It’s not like we don’t know each other. Your parents and your brother know you’re in my class.”

  She’d dried her tears and metaphorically stiffened her upper lip the way she always did. Colbie had put on her armor and prepared for battle. A battle she believed she’d fight alone. “And you should know that it won’t just be Caleb there. Carson and Casey are both coming home. They’ll expect you to talk UGA; you guys will get engrossed in football, and my parents will fawn over you like you’re the long-lost son they never had because you’re as football as every one of the Chapmans. Every one but me.”

  I couldn’t argue with her. She wouldn’t have listened anyhow. All I could do was show her. And I wasn’t able to do that until tomorrow night. “You’re going to have to trust me.”

  “Not even you can work miracles.”

  I let out a hearty laugh that probably would have gotten me smacked had Colbie been with me. “That wasn’t what you cried out this morning. I think you even made Jesus believe I could walk on water.”

  “I hate you.”

  “You love me.”

  “Bye, Eli.”

  “I’ll see you on the sidewalk.” And then again in my bed after we ran for the second time today since this morning had been cut short. “Love you, Cole.”

  She couldn’t do it. She couldn’t hang up without telling me she loved me, and I lived to hear it. Finally, Colbie relented with a huff. “I love you, too, Eli.” And there was no question in my mind of just how much.

  But Colbie needed someone to prove that devotion and commitment were reciprocated. Tomorrow might be my chance to do it. I’d bitten off more than I could chew, and I’d known that when I had accepted the invitation. Unfortunately, I had no legitimate way to get out of it. I spent every minute of free time I could squander with Colbie, and I’d avoided Caleb for the better part of first semester because of it. Now I prayed I could keep Colbie happy while not rousing any suspicion with the rest of the Chapmans.

  * * *

  Colbie had managed to escape her house this morning, although when she’d shown up at my back door in her running gear, she didn’t actually want to exercise. She’d pushed past me, grabbing my hand as she went. I didn’t make a habit of questioning her, so I followed along without remark. She hadn’t wasted time pulling me into my bedroom and tugging off my clothes followed by her own, nor did I hesitate when she pushed me onto the mattress.

  Colbie didn’t typically take charge. She was always pliable and definitely involved, but never the initiator. And while I had no idea what had gotten into her, I went with it anyhow. It wasn’t until she’d seated herself on my dick with her hands on my chest that I’d finally seen what she’d tried to hide deep inside.

  I’d flipped her over, but instead of giving her the punishing fuck she’d believed she needed, I made love to her. Reassured her. Wiped away her tears. And promised, no matter what happened today, I’d still love her tonight and tomorrow. And all the days after that.

  Colbie didn’t get it. But I’d spend a lifetime proving it to her.

  She was it for me.

  And now, here I stood with a bottle of wine in my hand for her mom and my finger on their doorbell. I could hear the clamor going on inside from the front porch. And when the door swung open, Chasity greeted me with a smile followed by a hug. Over her shoulder, I noticed Colbie with her mom. I hated touching another woman in any way, but especially now when I couldn’t go grab her and show the world who my heart belonged to. So I mouthed “sorry” and broke free from Caleb’s wife.

  “Eli.” Mrs. Chapman dropped what she was doing, leaving Colbie to finish the task, and raced to greet me. “We’re so glad you could join us. I can’t believe we haven’t seen you since you moved into town.” She wrapped an arm around my waist and escorted me into the kitchen. “We still do Sunday dinner every week. You should join us. You’re like family.”

  I doubted she’d feel that way if she knew I was in love with her daughter or what we’d been up to only hours before. “Thanks for the offer.”

  It only took minutes for everyone to go back to what they were doing, and even less time for me to see what Colbie hadn’t wanted me to. This wasn’t going to be as easy as I’d believed. I hadn’t seen Carson or Casey in ages, and as Colbie had predicted, the conversation flowed to football. It was the common denominator for everyone in attendance—including Jess—except Colbie. I looked around and realized Colbie hadn’t joined us.

  “Eli, you want a beer, man?” Caleb lifted his.

  I didn’t, but I assumed they kept them in the kitchen, which happened to be the last place I’d seen his sister. “Yeah.” I stood. “Fridge?”

  He nodded and pointed the way. I glanced back to ensure no one had followed or noticed me leave. Her hair was down and her back to me. Colbie hadn’t heard me come into the room. I took a chance I shouldn’t have and leaned my nose into her neck, circled my hands around her waist, and inhaled the comfort of her scent. I’d imagined coming home to her—our home—countless times to do just this. “Hey, baby,” I whispered into her ear and kissed her slender neck.

  Without hesitation, Colbie turned and found my lips. “Hey.” Her greeting was soft, but I felt it just the same.

  “I’m gonna grab a beer.” I pulled away and went toward the fridge. “You should join us,” I said as I leaned down to find a bottle.

  “Critter’s cooking. Don’t distract her if you actually want to eat tonight.”

  I slammed my head into the fridge when I jumped at the sound of Caleb’s voice. Tempering the rage I felt at his dismissal of his sister was infinitely more difficult than I’d imagined it would be, likely because I didn’t believe they’d exclude her with company around.

  “Damn, Paxton. I didn’t mean to scare you. What’s got you all jumpy? Toss me one.”

  I flipped my best friend off with one hand and tossed him a bottle with the other. “Colbie, you need any help in here?” I couldn’t leave without acknowledging her.

  “She doesn’t need your help, dumbass. She does this shit every year. Critter likes it, don’t you?”

  Chasity called from the living room, and Caleb went running. Not literally, but figuratively enough that he couldn’t deny the leash she had wound around his neck that one day she’d use to hang him.

  “Colbie?” I needed to see her eyes, even though she wouldn’t give them to me. I’d find every bit of heartache in her pale blue irises, and she didn’t want me to.

  She pulled her shoulders back and cleared her throat. “I’m good, Dr. Paxton. Thank you for offering.”

  I didn’t give a fuck if that was for show, it gutted me. She didn’t even address me that way at school anymore. She avoided addressing me at all. Because in our world, I was Eli and she was Cole.

  The noise from the living room grew as I realized how quiet the kitchen was. My heart stood sad and alone just feet away, and I couldn’t leave her. It might raise suspicion, and I’d probably regret it later, but right now, Colbie was my only priority.

  I set my beer on the counter and stepped to the sink to wash my hands. “Hey, Colbie. What can I do to help?”

  She watched me dry off with a dish towel, almost mortified. “What are you doing?” she hissed, and her eyes darted toward her family.

  “Earning my keep.” I tossed the towel on the counter and winked at her. “So, you can either show me what you want me to do, or I can take matters into my own hands. Although, I have to warn you, no one will be happy with me adding the finishing touches.” I lifted my brows and grinned. My back was to the living room that she faced. I could do whatever I wanted without risk of being seen; Colbie, however, could not.

  The plastic grin she secured to her lips didn’t hide the irritation in her eyes. And when she talked through t
he fake smile, I almost lost my composure. “You’re going to get us both in trouble.”

  I nipped playfully at her stomach, so no one could see. “Not if you just give me something to do. Then we both get what we want.”

  Her eyes narrowed yet her lips remained high. “Fine.” Colbie ground her teeth together. “You can peel and cut the potatoes. I’m sure Mama will be back in here soon enough.”

  “Perfect. The more the merrier.” I refused to allow her to be alone or panicked about my presence. I couldn’t hold her here. We both knew that. I couldn’t protect her physically with my embrace. I could, however, keep her from being isolated, and if I knew anything about her family—which I did—one by one, they would end up in the kitchen as well.

  Colbie handed me a vegetable peeler and pointed to the food. “Have at it.”

  I snatched the kitchen towel, spun it in a tight circle, and pegged her in the butt with a tight whip that made her jump and screech. The glitter I normally saw in her eyes returned, and so did her mom.

  “Colbie, is everything all right?” Elise had her hand over her heart. “I heard you yelp.”

  I snickered, hovered over the sink. I could feel Colbie glaring at me.

  “Yes, ma’am.” Colbie paused. “I slipped. I’m fine.” And she lied.

  “Eli, what are you doing? You’re our guest.”

  I turned toward Mrs. Chapman with a smile that had far less to do with her and more to do with Colbie and shook the peeler at the matron of the house. “Ah, ah, ah, you said I was family. Family helps with dinner.”

  “Oh, fiddle-faddle. That’s just nonsense.” She tried to wave me off. “Go back in there and have fun with the boys.”

  I didn’t budge, and I wasn’t going to. She could shoo me away from the food and forbid me to help, but I wouldn’t leave the kitchen without Colbie. “I’m a firm believer in pulling my weight. I really don’t mind helping. Actually, I kind of like it.” I didn’t have to turn to sense every bit of Colbie’s apprehension; I could feel it as if it were my own. “Do you have an extra apron?” I maintained the most innocent expression I could manage.

  Mrs. Chapman giggled and handed me one that clearly belonged to her husband. The three of us set to work with idle chitchat, most of which Colbie’s mom directed toward me, and I tried to wind around to include Colbie, who took every chance I gave her to stay involved. And as I had predicted, Caleb came to find me, then Chasity to locate him, and one by one, the entire family—both parents, seven kids, one wife, and two significant others—had crowded into what was typically an enormous space.

  Several times, I caught a peek from Colbie, and I took every opportunity afforded me to brush up against her or sneak between her and someone else. I needed to feel her, and that was the best I could get. And by the grace of God, Elise sat me next to the love of my life at the table. When it came time to say the blessing, everyone took hands, and again, I thanked heaven to get the chance to stroke her fingers while everyone’s eyes were closed, and give her a squeeze when we said, “Amen.”

  With twelve people seated around one table, even normal conversation was deafening. Everyone carried on with someone else, regardless of where they sat in relation to them at the table—everyone except Colbie. She ate quietly and responded the couple of times someone spoke directly to her, but otherwise, she didn’t join in. And it didn’t escape my attention that the only time her family spoke to her was to have her pass something.

  Except Chasity.

  Whom I had started to hate.

  She nipped at Colbie with backhanded compliments more than once and did so in a way that no one else heard what she said, except me.

  “Do you ever get full?” Chasity held her fork in her hand and sipped her tea with the other. Her eyes accused Colbie of something, although I couldn’t discern what or why. “I’d be as big as the side of the house if I ate like you.”

  My eyes darted between Chasity across the table and Colbie at my side while chatter clamored on around us. I hadn’t noticed that Colbie ate much, ever. In fact, I worried she never ate and worked out too much, with as much weight as she’d lost since the beginning of the year. I couldn’t put a number to it, but I held the girl in my arms daily. I’d memorized every curve and angle of her naked body. Even in the few weeks since we started having sex, I’d seen evidence of weight loss.

  “Do you eat like that at every meal? Or just dinner?” Chasity hadn’t let up, and I wondered what she thought she knew.

  I sucked at this kind of thing. I didn’t understand the cruelty of women toward each other, and I’d never get catty behavior, of which Chasity was reigning queen.

  “It’s all the miles she runs.” Jess perked up and into the conversation. “You could eat whatever you wanted if you put in five or six miles a day.” She thought she had helped her best friend. “Sometimes she runs more than once a day.” Jess grinned at Colbie, and it was heartfelt…genuine. “I wish I had that kind of dedication.”

  Like a shrinking violet, Colbie turned in to herself, and she quit responding. But Chasity hadn’t stopped.

  “How many calories do you think you eat a day?” Chasity glanced at Colbie’s plate and back up. “I bet it’s thousands.”

  Jess shook her head. “Oh no, she eats like a rabbit at school.”

  No one other than me seemed the least bit distracted much less concerned about this discussion or why it was even taking place. And I had to sit there and watch it happen. I couldn’t add anything or question Colbie. She had eaten a fair amount tonight, but it was Thanksgiving. We had all overeaten. But Chasity had an ulterior motive that I couldn’t figure out. As much as I wanted to pin her to a wall and drive a stake through her heart, I was helpless.

  Minutes dragged by when Chasity finally got involved in a conversation that didn’t involve her sister-in-law. But by that point, the damage had been done.

  I leaned over while everyone else focused on one of Mr. Chapman’s football stories. “What the hell was that?”

  Colbie shrugged, and a tear slipped down her cheek. She wiped it away as quickly as it had fallen.

  I slid my hand around the back of her chair and turned slightly to be certain no one heard—or read my lips—what I said. “I love you.”

  Colbie turned into my shoulder and returned the sentiment.

  “What are you two whispering about?” Chasity alerted everyone at the table, causing all eyes to face us.

  Colbie scooted her chair back. “I had asked Eli to let me out so I could go to the restroom. I didn’t want to disrupt everyone.”

  The two girls stared each other down, and I waited for Colbie to lash out and claw at her brother’s wife. My jaw hung slightly ajar when no one—not even Caleb—told Chasity to back off. But Chasity’s smug grin was evidence that she knew they wouldn’t.

  When Colbie stood, I put my hand on her knee where no one could see it beneath the table, and she glanced down at me, never missing a beat.

  “You okay?”

  She nodded, and the weight of Chasity’s stare almost smothered me. “Yes, sir.”

  Any other time—particularly if she were naked—that might have turned me on. This time, it was ice water to my libido and morale. Another reminder of who I was to Colbie in her family’s eyes…her teacher.

  Colbie discreetly disappeared up the steps, and I despised not being able to follow. Maybe she really did just need to use the restroom, although there was one right down the hall, but I gathered it was more than that. She had needed to escape.

  Casey and Caden got up to put dishes in the sink, and Chasity helped Mrs. Chapman put leftovers away to prepare for dessert. I sat, bewildered, in the same place I’d been since Colbie had left.

  Jess plopped down in the seat next to me, the one Colbie had vacated. She propped her foot on the edge of the chair and put her chin on the knee she hugged. To anyone else in the room, it appeared casual. “She’s okay, Dr. Paxton.”

  I searched for prying eyes or ears, yet found non
e.

  Jess dipped her head toward the stairs. “She’s just really…regular.” Jess’s brows lifted like she was imparting secret information, information I didn’t understand.

  “What?”

  Her eyes danced around. “You know…regular.” She huffed with irritation at my inability to decipher whatever code she spoke in. “Like her stomach processes things at the same time every day.” She hid her mouth with a cupped hand to keep her words from drifting farther away. “Sheesh, she’s dropping the kids off at the pool.”

  And the lightbulb finally went off. “Oh…”

  Jess laughed. “For being so smart, you’re not so bri—” She stopped herself before throwing that insult my direction. “Is anything I say here going to get me in trouble at school?”

  I patted her shoulder and chuckled. “No, Jess. You’re fine. Thanks.”

  “Eli, how about a little round ball in the driveway?” Caleb spun a basketball on his finger, and I couldn’t turn him down.

  His wife was busy, Colbie hadn’t come back, and everyone else was occupied with something else. I wasn’t exactly dressed for basketball, but neither was he.

  “Sure.” I followed him through the kitchen and out the back door.

  Everything Caleb and I did became a competition, even when it was hoops in his parents’ driveway. In minutes, the two of us were drenched in sweat. Not much had been said, but when you’d lived with someone for as long as Caleb and I had been roommates, you just got a sense they had something on their mind. And while I was afraid to ask, it was either that or be stuck out here, smelling like I hadn’t bathed in days.

  I went in for a layup, and on my way down, I finally dug in. “What’s on your mind, Caleb?”

  He took the rebound and dribbled out. “What makes you think I’ve got something on my mind?” Caleb bent at the knees and lunged up. The ball left the arch he created with his hand, and I watched as it went into the basket, nothing but net.