London Undone

by Nan Higgins

  “So,” London said, “what sounds good? Do you always get pancakes, or do you switch things up sometimes?”

  “I always get the pancakes. Sometimes I’ll get eggs too, if I’m really hungry. Or I used to.” He fidgeted with the corner of the menu. “I haven’t been here in a long time.”

  “How long has it been?”

  “My parents kicked me out in October, so not since last summer.”

  “I see. I’m really sorry.”

  Quentin shrugged. He didn’t seem to want to talk about it, and she sure wasn’t going to make him.

  “Get whatever you want,” she said. “I’m famished. I might even get the Barnyard Buster.”

  Quentin giggled. “That’s the biggest meal on the menu.”

  “I know. I love to eat.”

  “Me too. I’m always hungry.”

  She was amazed at how this kid could chow down. She was less than halfway done by the time he finished. “Do you want anything else?”

  He shook his head and smiled. “No thanks, I’m full.”

  “Okay. I was thinking maybe we could go over to Target and get you a winter coat.” She’d noticed he only had a hoodie and shivered in the forty-degree weather. Winter wasn’t even here yet, and that hoodie wasn’t going to get him through it. He probably needed a lot more than just a coat, but she wanted to ease into things. She knew all too well that every item he had to replace would be a reminder of the parents who cast him out. It hit her again how very young he was to be going through this. She’d been in college when her family ostracized her, and there had been moments the pain was so great, she felt she wouldn’t survive it. She didn’t want Quentin to have any doubt that he would survive.

  “Really?”

  “Yep. It’s not going to be warm again for a long time.”

  He was quiet for a moment. “You don’t have to do that, you know.”

  “Buy you a coat?”

  “Yeah.”

  “I know I don’t have to, but I’d like it if you let me get you one.”

  “Why?”

  “Well, um…” She frowned. “I mean, because it’s cold. Please?”

  “Okay,” he said.

  “Good.”

  Seeing the overflowing Target parking lot, she remembered it was Black Friday.

  “We can do this some other time.” Quentin looked anxious. His eyes darted around the parking lot, and he fidgeted with the zipper on his hoodie.

  She glanced at him. “Not a fan of crowds?”

  He hesitated. “I’m worried we’ll run into my parents. They shop at this Target and are always here on Black Friday.”

  “Say no more.” She navigated back toward the exit. “We’ll get you a new coat tomorrow, okay?”

  “Sure.”

  “I wanted to give you a heads-up,” she said, “in terms of the rest of today. When Reg gets home this afternoon, she’s going to take you to her parents’ house; she really wants you to meet them. I think you’ll like them. They’re basically the nicest people ever. And tonight, one of my closest friends, Grant, will be coming over for a slumber party. He came with me to Compass, remember? It’ll be chill, just eating junk food and watching movies. As long as all this is cool with you?”

  “Reggie’s parents. They know she’s gay?”

  “Yep.”

  “And they know you’re together?”

  “They’re great with it, actually. They’ve been great about it since she came out.”

  He looked out his window. “That’s nice.”

  “The holidays make it even harder, don’t they?” When he didn’t answer, she continued. “I remember my first Christmas after I came out. I was twenty and in college, and I’d come out to my family on Thanksgiving.”

  “Why did you do it then?” He still looked out the window, but he at least sounded interested.

  “Actually, I guess I didn’t technically come out so much as I accidentally outed myself,” she said. “I’d been dating this girl I met in my English lit class, and I snuck off after we ate dinner to call her. This was back when everyone had a landline. My mother picked up another receiver in the house to make a call of her own and heard me talking to my girlfriend.”

  Now he did turn. “What were you saying?”

  She blushed. “Let’s just say, there was no way I could spin it to seem like we were just friends. She told my father, and within fifteen minutes of hanging up the phone, they kicked me out, and I ended up driving back to school. By the time Christmas came, I wasn’t seeing that girl anymore. My roommate invited me to spend Christmas with her, but…”

  “But what?”

  “I was pretty gun shy about family stuff for a long time.” That was an understatement, but she didn’t want to go into too much detail. Family had been a dirty word for her until she’d begun to figure out that family wasn’t necessarily linked to blood or biology. It had taken a lot of years to redefine what it meant to her, and it hadn’t come easily. “I didn’t want to be with her family or anybody else’s. So I stayed in the dorms and studied and watched horror movies and went to clubs and did pretty much everything I could to pretend it wasn’t Christmas.”

  “Did you ever see your family again?”

  “I tried a few times. I called my parents on their anniversary and sent my twin sister a gift for our birthday. I wrote a lot of letters.”

  “What happened?”

  She was a little sorry she’d started this conversation. That had been one of the most painful, isolating times in her life. Aside from the bond she’d had with Tate, she’d been lost in the world. As far as she’d come, she still didn’t love rehashing how hurt and alone she’d felt. “They hung up on me. Diana sent my present back. And if anyone read my letters, they never responded. After the first year, I stopped trying to contact them.”

  “I’m sorry,” he said.

  She rested her hand on his arm. “I’m sorry too.”

  He shivered, and London cranked up the heat as high as it would go. She was sweltering, but she couldn’t stand to see him tremble. She was rewarded with a grateful smile, and by the time they got home, he said he was all warmed up.

  * * *

  “Pass the popcorn,” Grant said. “I’m starving.” He sat cross-legged on the floor under some blankets.

  “I made a fruit and veggie plate, and you haven’t touched it,” Reggie scolded. “But you can complain about being hungry?”

  “Okay, slumber party night is not made for fruits and veggies.” He turned to London. “You gotta back me up on this.”

  “The man is right,” she said. “Junk food only on slumber party nights. Pizza, popcorn, brownies. The staples.”

  Reggie shook her head. “You’re both setting a terrible example.” She wrapped an arm around Quentin, who sat between them on the couch. “You’ll eat my cucumber slices, won’t you, Q?”

  He grinned sheepishly. “I’d rather have another slice of pizza.”

  Reggie laughed. “Heathens, all of you!”

  They’d given Quentin full command of the remote for the night. So far, they’d watched two Jackass movies and were now starting Cujo. Reggie was wrapped in an enormous blanket made for a king-size bed.

  “I can’t believe I let you guys talk me into this movie.” Her voice was muffled. All London could see was her eyes. “London, I hope you’ll enjoy sleeping with the lights on tonight because I won’t be staying in a dark room.”

  “I’ll protect you from the imaginary movie dog,” she said. “Don’t worry.”

  “Someday,” Reggie said, “when we get a dog, it sure as hell won’t be a Saint Bernard. Not after this.”

  “You guys are gonna get a dog?” Quentin asked.

  “We’d like to,” London said. “Just not here. We’d rather be in a bigger place, somewhere with a yard.”

  “That’s cool,” he said. “I love dogs.”

  “Have you ever had one?” Grant asked.

  Quentin shook his head. “My mom and sister are a
llergic.”

  There was an awkward silence, then London asked, “Hey, what do you think of the name Chowder for a dog?”

  He considered it. “Sounds kind of weird.”

  She nodded. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

  “But,” he said, “on the right dog, it could work.”

  “A weird dog?”

  “Right.”

  Cujo lunged at the barely-closed-in-time car door in the movie, and Reggie jumped off the couch.

  “Sorry, guys.” She untangled herself from her gigantic blanket. “I tried, but I can’t do this movie. If anyone needs me, I’ll be in the bedroom watching Marley & Me.”

  Grant tossed some popcorn in his mouth. “You’d rather watch that sad dog movie than this angry dog movie?”

  “Any day of the week.” She kissed London on the cheek. “See you when you come to bed.”

  By the time Cujo was over, Grant was sprawled out on the floor, snoring.

  “Should we wake him up and tell him to get on the couch?” Quentin asked.

  London shook her head. “Grant sleeps like the dead; there’s no point in even trying to wake him. In fact…” She went to the corner of the living room where she kept her art supplies and pulled out some markers. “Wanna decorate his face with me? Make this a real slumber party?”

  He gave her an astonished smile. “Are you serious?”

  She grinned and uncapped the red marker, handing the other colors to Quentin. “Yep.” They drew hearts, shamrocks, and stars on his face and giggled when they were done. “He looks like a bowl of Lucky Charms.”

  “Is he gonna be mad?”

  “Nah. Well, maybe for a half a second, but I’ll take the heat. And I made sure we used markers that will wash right off.” She held up one to show him the stain-free disclaimer. She stood, stretched her legs, and yawned. “I’m about ready to call it a night. Do you need anything before I go to bed?”

  He shook his head. “I don’t think so.” He paused. “Thank you for today.”

  “You don’t have to thank me.”

  “I know, but…you didn’t have to do all this. You or Reggie. I didn’t expect all this.”

  His gratitude at the simple efforts they made to feed him and introduce him to their friends and family broke London’s heart. He was such a sweet kid, and she couldn’t fathom any parents who wouldn’t feel over the moon to have him.

  She hugged him. “You deserve all this. All of it.”

  She was surprised to see Reggie was still awake when she went into the bedroom. “Are they asleep?” Reggie asked.

  “Grant is, and I think Q will be pretty soon. Still watching your sad movie?”

  “Just finished it. I was waiting up for you.”

  “Really?” London crawled into bed beside her. “How sweet. Any particular reason?” She kissed Reggie’s neck and slipped her hand inside her T-shirt, running her fingers up Reggie’s spine.

  “Mmm,” Reggie murmured. She kissed London deeply, their tongues intertwining, leaving them both breathless. London moved to take Reggie’s T-shirt off, but Reggie held up a hand. “Wait. I had a different reason for waiting up.”

  London paused with her hand on Reggie’s waist, and her mouth skimming over Reggie’s collarbone. “What is it?”

  Reggie scooted back a little. “I wanted to run something past you.” She gently cupped London’s chin, moving her face away so they were looking into each other’s eyes.

  “Okay, but this better be good, considering what you’re interrupting.”

  “I think it is. I want to go steal a Christmas tree from your parents’ property with you.”

  “What?”

  Reggie nodded. “I’ve been thinking about it a lot. Even if this is the last year you do it, I think we should. I always wanted to go with you guys.”

  “You did?” She was genuinely surprised. She and Tate had always discussed their plans openly; she couldn’t imagine why Reggie never spoke up. “Why didn’t you ever tell me? We would’ve loved it if you came with us.”

  “I should’ve just asked. You and Tate were in your own world half the time. I spent way too long hoping for invitations into that world instead of jumping in and making myself at home there.”

  “I’m sorry.” She felt terrible. She wondered how many other times Reggie had wanted to participate in one of their schemes and waited for them to ask her to join. It had never occurred to her that she and Tate had made anyone feel left out. “I’m sorry if I ever made you feel like you didn’t belong.”

  Reggie shook her head. “It’s okay. You two were a force. I don’t know if you ever realized it. The people around you, sometimes all we could do was watch and just be glad to be nearby. I don’t know how to explain it. It was magic, the way you interacted with each other. I never wanted to do anything to mess up the magic.”

  “You wouldn’t have. There was enough magic to go around.”

  “I know that now. Anyway, what do you think? Given what your father has been doing, it would be fun to do a little thieving, a little middle finger in the form of a tree stump. And I think Tate would have approved.”

  “Yes, that’s true.” It was an enticing idea. Tate would have been giddy at the thought of sticking it to her father after the way he’d behaved recently. She could practically hear him giggling, and the joy and pain twisted her heart like a wrung-out washcloth. “There’s just one thing.”

  “What?”

  “Quentin. I don’t think we should be involving him in misdemeanor trespassing and felony theft.”

  “Neither do I. But he’s in school for seven hours a day. That gives us just enough time to get there, do the dirty work, and get back to surprise him with a freshly cut Christmas tree.”

  “When did you become such an evil genius?”

  Reggie smiled. “I learned it all from you.”

  “Okay, I’m in. Monday?”

  “Monday it is. Now, where were we?” She kissed London, nibbling on her bottom lip. “Here? Were we about here?”

  London tugged Reggie’s shirt over her head and pulled on her hips until Reggie was straddling her. “We were on our way here.”

  Chapter Fourteen

  “You’re sure you’re good?” London peered up at the mammoth-looking school. “You don’t need us to walk you in or anything?”

  Quentin shook his head. “I’m twelve years old. And I come here every day.”

  “He’ll be fine,” Reggie said.

  “Okay. Well, we’ll meet you here at the end of the day.”

  “Got it.” He hopped out of the car and zipped up his new coat. “See ya!” He ran off without looking back and joined a few kids walking in.

  “Hey.” Reggie rested her hand on London’s. “You okay?”

  “Yeah.” London blushed and laughed. “I wasn’t prepared for worrying about him like this.”

  Quentin walked through the large doors, and it looked as if the imposing structure swallowed him up. She knew it was silly to be so nervous, but she’d become protective of him in the few days he’d been with them.

  “It’s just school,” Reggie said. “Kids do this every day.”

  “I know, but it’s my first day doing it with him.”

  “Aww.” Reggie spoke in a baby-talk voice she knew London hated. “We gotta wet the baby bird fwy away.”

  “You’re a nightmare.” She swatted Reggie’s hand away and put the car in gear. She navigated carefully through the parking lot, and when they stopped at the red light, she turned to Reggie. “You’re sure you wanna do this? Because once we get onto I-71, there’s no changing our minds. When we hit the road, we hit the road.”

  “I’m sure,” Reggie said. “I’ve been waiting years to do this with you.”

  Rush hour was crazy, and it took longer than they expected to get out of the city. Reggie performed the traditional Shotgun DJ duties and put on a Lenny Kravitz mix. They sang together to “Are You Gonna Go My Way,” “Always on the Run,” and “American Woman.�
� Reggie even pulled the lever to drop her seat down, kicked her leg in the air, and played air guitar. London had forgotten how much fun it was to road trip with her.

  Finally, and only a little behind schedule, they saw the signs for Keys Crossing. London’s family lived on the opposite end of town on the outskirts. As they drove through town, Reggie turned down the radio.

  “So, what’s the plan?”

  “Pretty simple,” London said. “The property goes five acres back with the far edge of the acreage aligned with an old dirt service road that farmers used to use. Maybe they still do. We’ll use that old dirt road, stop when we find a good tree, cut it down, pile it on your FJ, and be on our way back to civilization.”

  “And you’re never worried about getting caught when you do this?”

  “Having second thoughts?”

  “Not at all, just like to know what I’m getting myself into.”

  “That’s fair. I don’t really worry about getting caught. Like I said, it’s on an old dirt road. Nobody in my family would deign to drive their Mercedes back there. I didn’t even know that road existed until I was in high school and one of my friends took it as a shortcut to get to my house.”

  “Okay.” Reggie pulled a saw and some twine into the front seat. Several minutes later, they turned down the dirt road, and dust clouded up around them. “I don’t think I’ve ever actually been down a dirt road. I didn’t expect so much…dirt.”

  London laughed. “It’s been dry for several months. Once we get a few good snows, it won’t puff up like this.” She slowed when she got close to her family’s property. “There,” she said, pointing several yards into the distance. “See those pine trees? Blue spruces, they make the best Christmas tree.” She pulled off the road a little to the embankment so that in the unlikely event that another vehicle passed by, there’d be room. She had no plan for how she’d explain cutting down a tree, and she doubted she’d need one.

  They got out of Reggie’s FJ and walked along the property. London inhaled the scent of the trees.

  “If only someone could bottle that smell, they’d make a fortune!” Tate had said last year. “Oh, wait, Bath & Body Works already did that.”