From the Top

by Dani Collins

  “Have you told anyone?”

  “My ex.”

  Why did that go through her like a spear, leaving an open wound in its wake?

  “Not that you’re the mother, just that there’s a baby.” Now he sounded painfully stilted. Averse. “Look, if no one knows… Maybe you should go back to Sweden to have it. When the baby is born, I’ll…” He trailed off.

  She didn’t know what would happen, either. That was the reason she was here.

  “I don’t have anywhere to live there. I gave up my apartment.”

  “Why?”

  “It was too expensive.” She had looked online for a few places, but now she could stay here in trade for repeating a spiel over the phone to inquiring callers and punching bookings into a computer.

  “Do you need money?” He sounded surprised.

  “Everyone needs money.” There was always government assistance, of course, but that was her last resort.

  “I mean, what do you usually do for rent and groceries? I thought you had, like, sponsorships or something.”

  “I had to withdraw from the World Cup. I won’t see any of the prize money I was hoping for. As for sponsorships, those tend to come in three levels: gold, silver, and bronze.” She put up her fingers: one, two, three. “None of which I attained. I’ve been informed that my previous arrangements will not be renewed. I doubt I’ll top anyone’s list once I’m a single mother, not unless I’m killing it in qualifiers. Even then, how many single moms do you see hawking big-name products?” She didn’t even know how she would afford to get herself and her equipment onto the slopes to train, let alone to the races. Those expenses burned through savings fast.

  “Am I supposed to feel guilty?”

  “I’m just saying, yours isn’t the only life being ruined.”

  It’s not too late…

  She held her breath hoping he would argue that this baby wasn’t ruining either of their lives. She had to quit thinking it was ruining hers. That’s how her mother had viewed her and she was still trying to prove her worth.

  She felt so unwanted and isolated right now. How was she supposed to be a decent mother? She didn’t know how. She needed him.

  Nate wasn’t saying anything, which rubbed further against the raw spot behind her heart. She so needed him to accept this baby. To help her raise it. To show her how.

  “Look,” he finally said. “When it comes to my kid, I’m going to look after it. If you need me to cover some bills, say so. I’ll do what I can. If you need to work at the lodge, I guess I can’t stop you, but it’s going to be a helluva busy summer. Don’t expect much from me.”

  As she absorbed that, she realized what was wearing this hollow spot in her. It wasn’t fear of him rejecting the baby. He seemed to want it, which was a relief. But it didn’t alleviate the pain at all. Because he was rejecting her.

  And that hurt something awful.

  Chapter Seven

  Ilke liked the three o’clock hour. Workers had usually taken their afternoon break and were back at their tasks, trying to finish before it was time to clean up and knock off. Around this time, the dining room staff moved into the kitchen to help with dinner prep. Fewer people came and went through the lobby, and even the phones stopped ringing. Marvin usually went for a nap before opening the bar at five and Vivien retreated to her room to rest before dressing for dinner.

  Since Nate rarely came back from the base before five-thirty, Ilke didn’t even have to worry about bumping into him and suffering whatever shade of antipathy he was throwing her way. She could concentrate on what she was doing. Today, she was sorting emails and responding to inquiries.

  After a week, it was all growing pretty routine, but one email jumped out at her. It was a confirmation from the company that covered the employee health benefits. Ilke glanced at the cover letter, saw it instructed her to print the attachment for company records, and did. She plucked it off the printer a minute later and moved to file it.

  It was probably a privacy violation that she read it, but she was just making sure she didn’t need to do anything else. Then she stood there puzzled because, huh. Her predecessor in this job, Macy, had a dependent. Not a child, either. A common-law spouse.

  Trigg was an unrepentant man-whore who made zero promises to the women he slept with, but they were always single and up for it. He had some standards. He wasn’t a home-wrecker. So why had he slept with someone in a committed relationship?

  She wandered down to the kitchen and found the barista, Lina. She was ignoring the dishes in the sink, talking to the line cook.

  “Do you mind watching the desk? I have to run up and talk to Glory about something.”

  “Sure.”

  Ilke jogged up all six flights of the back stairs, printed page clutched in her hand. She felt the lack of proper cardio, panting as she hurried down the hall and knocked on Glory’s door.

  Glory took a minute to answer and was surprised to see her, but gave her a relaxed smile. “Hi. You know we have things called telephones that save you running up three floors?”

  “Are you busy?”

  “Just hanging out with Eden.” Glory stepped back to wave an invitation into her room. “Have you two met? Eden’s a friend from town. Her mother owned the bistro and she and her sister are keeping it going. We’re talking cakes and catering. Ilke’s working our front desk until we find a new manager.”

  “I didn’t mean to interrupt, but I wanted to show you this. It’s super weird and maybe not something I should be talking about at the front desk.” Ilke offered the page as she walked in, but was immediately pulled up short by the mess. The room was a big corner one, like Vivien’s, but it wasn’t properly finished and looked like a book-bomb had gone off.

  “Don’t ask,” Glory muttered as she closed the door. “We’re actually sleeping in Rolf’s old room across the hall because I’ve got so much going on in here.”

  Ilke had been in here once, last summer. She’d had a bit of a fangirl moment because Glory’s mother, Kathleen Cormer, had always been one of her favorite romance authors. Glory had given her a signed copy of one of her mother’s most popular books.

  Ilke had stored it at her mother’s with her medals from Worlds. Not because she was sentimental, but because she had actually read that particular book between the races that had won her those medals. Romance novels were her drug of choice for taking her out of the daily grind. The plucky heroines who dusted themselves off after a blow were keeping her sane every night, these days, encouraging her to stay on her own feet and fight the good fight, despite the odds.

  Glory still ran the business side of her deceased mother’s bestselling career by republishing the books online. She had also spent last year quietly writing her own book. She was now starting her own romance career and that appeared to be a disorganized process. Her desk was in the corner under the windows, overlooking the expansive view, but it was littered with papers and folders, pens and notebooks along with dirty dishes and a half-full glass of wine.

  The bed was covered in boxes of books, the floor littered with wicker baskets and bins with pens and notepads and other swag. The bright yellow shelves that had held her mother’s collection of author copies was now overflowing with stacks of reference books and romances by other authors.

  Most surprisingly, the wall where her dresser and television had been was now a gaping hole into the adjacent room. A plastic sheet hung from the ceiling to curtain it off.

  A young woman sat in an armchair in front of it. She had long brown hair that was dyed blue on the ends.

  “Hi,” Eden greeted her. “I saw you at the New Year’s party. I thought you were a skier.”

  “You sang a couple of songs, didn’t you? You have a great voice.” Ilke ignored the remark about being a skier.

  “I’m okay.” Eden shrugged that off. “Do you want a drink? It’s not the good stuff that Glory pours. I brought it and the best we can say is that it’s drinkable.”

  “No, thank
s, I’m just here to show Glory…”

  Glory lifted her gaze off the sheet she held, wide-eyed with disbelief. She turned the page over a couple of times. “For real? Serge is the pilot who takes all our heli-tours.”

  “Oh. I guess I remember that now, but I just thought it was weird—”

  “Super weird,” Glory agreed. “I have to tell Rolf.” She looked for her phone.

  “Tell him what?” Eden asked with sharp curiosity.

  “There might be privacy concerns,” Ilke said quickly, glancing at Glory.

  “Eden’s dad is the police chief. Actually, give him a call,” she said to Eden. “Let Ilke tell him about this while I tell Rolf.”

  Eden reached for her phone and dialed with a couple of swipes. “Hey, Dad. No, I’m fine. Just out at the lodge. Something has come up that you’re supposed to hear about. This is Ilke. She’s working the front desk.”

  Ilke took the phone and explained what she had been doing and how she had seen Serge’s name attached to Macy’s.

  As she spoke, Eden’s eyes widened and her jaw dropped. Behind her, Glory said, “Rolf wants Kurt to call him as soon as you’re done, Ilke.”

  Ilke nodded and relayed the message, then agreed to come sign a statement when she was next in town.

  When she hung up, Eden said, “Oh. My. Gawd.”

  “Yeah, that’s a pretty big Holy Fuck. Can you hear that explosion in the distance? That’s my man, going off,” Glory said with a point toward the window.

  “Not a good day for this, then,” Eden said, tilting her wineglass.

  “’Fraid not.”

  “Bummer. Sure you don’t want to get hammered?” she asked Ilke.

  “I would love to,” Ilke said wryly. “But I’m actually working and should get back to it.”

  Glory stopped her on the way to the door. “Seriously, Ilke. Thank you. This is huge.”

  She shrugged it off, never having receiving much praise from anyone for anything, except maybe a few admiring words for a nice turn or a fast finish. Glory’s gratitude made her feel self-conscious and appreciated. Like she had come through for her team.

  Which they weren’t.

  “No problem,” she mumbled, and got the hell out.

  *

  Nate veered toward Ilke’s room on his way down to dinner and knocked, not even sure if she was in there. He hadn’t seen her much since their drive back from Kalispell, but she’d sure been the topic of the day at the base.

  She cracked the door and peeked around it so only her face showed. Her hair was in a messy ball on top of her head. “Yes?”

  She was giving the impression she was naked behind the door and his dick twitched in response. He ignored it.

  “Nice catch today.”

  “Oh. I was wondering what came of that.” She backed up and opened the door to invite him in.

  A yoga mat was open on the floor alongside the bed. The lamp on the nightstand cast a golden glow over it.

  Behind the closing door, she was shrugging into the robe she’d plucked from the hook, but she might as well have been wearing her birthday suit. Her halter-style sports bra and skin-tight yoga shorts kicked him in the libido. Damn, that was a lot of smooth skin over lithe muscle.

  “How, uh…” He lost the plot. It was really hot in here. Except it wasn’t. He distantly felt a chill in the air, but the fire of sexual hunger took hold in his jeans, making the underside of his skin sizzle and feel too tight all over his entire body.

  “I was doing some stretches.” She closed the robe and knotted the belt.

  “Why don’t you go to the gym?” What a stupid thing to say. He didn’t want any other man seeing her like this. Her breasts were even more spectacular than he remembered and he recalled them as the nicest pair he’d ever had the privilege to caress. The room was full of the light, heady scent of her that had lingered in his memory for weeks. He wanted all of this to be his alone to appreciate.

  It was a stunning realization when he’d been trying so damned hard to think of her as a stranger who happened to be carrying his child. A problem that needed solving, not a woman who had rocked his world.

  Yet it only took being alone with her like this and he was barely staying inside his own body. His cock was protesting the press of his fly, threatening to embarrass him. His hands were dying to roam her waist and cruise down to cup the curve of her ass. Everything in him was going lizard brained. All he could think about was the way she’d felt when he’d been inside her. Like liquid silk, hot and ecstatically perfect, taking all of him with luxurious moans of pleasure. It had been intoxicating.

  Hadn’t it?

  He found himself delving into the blue pools surrounded by pale lashes, willing her to confirm that. Remember.

  A pretty blush rose in her cheeks and her gaze skittered away. His scalp prickled while she folded her arms and looked away, profile struggling to find a neutral expression.

  Don’t be shy, he wanted to say. He ached to reach out and pull her close and remind her that they had been spectacular together.

  Her pretty lips, which always looked as though they were pursing for a kiss, pulled flat with dismay. “People talk to me when I’m there.”

  “Where?”

  “The gym.” She frowned.

  “Oh. Right.” Get a grip, Nathaniel. He ran a hand down his face.

  “Trigg saw me and said I wasn’t working hard enough.” She folded her arms. “And one of these days I’ll start to show, so…” She shrugged. “I’d rather do my own thing in here.”

  Show. He might have stopped breathing because his vision blurred and his ears rang. He definitely wanted the right to touch her and map her body as it changed. As his baby grew inside her.

  No matter how he tried, he reacted to her in ways that transcended a one-nighter. Why the hell did this have to be so complicated?

  “So, um, this Macy person really slept with Trigg just to have a reason to quit that wasn’t suspicious? I mean…” Ilke tucked her hair behind her ear. “Trigg’s hot, but…”

  Nate frowned, annoyed to hear she thought Trigg was ‘hot,’ but it snapped him back to all that had happened today and why he was here.

  “Actually.” He scratched his hair and made a face. “Turns out his pillow talk includes whether he could get her free skis and when.”

  Finally, she met his gaze again, her own wide with shock. “Trigg told her the container was coming?”

  “Told her when.” He tilted his head in agreement. “It’s not clear how she knew it was planned. Rolf has been keeping that shipment need-to-know. Maybe Serge overheard something, because Rolf promised the investors new skis when he started making arrangements for their tour back in January. Somehow Macy knew a shipment was on its way because she asked Trigg about it.”

  “When? Wasn’t he away?”

  “She got with him the one night he was here between training and leaving for the games. He promised her new skis as soon as he got back. If I had to make a guess, I would say they were hoping to empty it while Rolf and Trigg were in Korea, because I remember seeing tracks with a tub the day before it arrived. It arrived a day late. The next day, we had cross-country skiers take over the place through most of February. And with the time shift, and people watching the live coverage of the games through the night, things were pretty lively here around the clock. Whatever the plan was, when the funeral came up, they must have seen their chance.”

  “But for her to quit the day it happened? That’s so suspicious.”

  “No, she left three days before,” he reminded her. “There’s no proof she told anyone anything, though. She was at the service the day of the theft. Perfect alibi.”

  “So, no arrests?”

  “They’ll both be questioned again, but no. Nothing so far. The best Rolf could do was cancel his bookings with Serge. He’s pissed right off that he’ll lose his deposit because he doesn’t have cause, but he’s convinced Serge is in on it. He doesn’t want to take any chances.”
r />   “What did Trigg say?”

  “Plenty. So did Rolf,” Nate said dryly. He did his level best to stay out of any disagreements between those two, though. Rolf was his boss and Nate liked his no-bullshit, decisive personality, but the guy could learn some people skills. Trigg was his friend, smart and funny and resourceful, but he didn’t know when to quit, especially when it came to a power struggle with his brother. “I thought I’d be cleaning up more than turkey blood this time.”

  She snorted. “They are a pair of turkeys.”

  “True dat. Although, I sometimes wonder if I would have turned into something like them if I’d had a brother, rather than a sister. I get pretty competitive with my cousin.”

  “I’m horribly competitive.” She wrinkled her nose. “I probably would have killed and eaten a sibling if I had one.”

  He barked out a laugh. She was way too angelic-looking to say something like that, let alone do it.

  “It’s true.” She played with the tail on her robe tie, a smirk hovering on her pink lips.

  “Yeah?” He really didn’t know enough about what kind of person she was under that perfect-as-a-snowflake exterior. And whose fault was that? “Lemme buy you dinner,” he said. “As a thank you for flagging that connection today.”

  “Be seen with you? What would people think?” She might have meant it as a joke, but it was a little too truthful and fell flat.

  He sighed, wishing things weren’t so…

  “You know—” He pushed his fists into his jean pockets, heart in a knot because he couldn’t say it wouldn’t bother him if people found out about the baby. At the same time, he didn’t want her to think he was a complete heel. “It’s not just you. You know my ex-wife lives with a woman, right?”

  She kept her head down, but went very still. Her gaze came up, cautious, but not surprised. “I heard that, yes,” she said carefully.

  “Yeah, well, Trigg told me a few weeks ago that the locals refer to them as my ‘California marriage.’” It was meant as a joke, not a cruelty, but it left a scald under his breastbone all the same. He’d grown up so determined to have a ‘real’ marriage. A conventional, nuclear family. “This…” He waved at her. “People are going to say I’m going full European ménage.”