by Tamie Dearen
“Okay,” Jace answered in a small voice.
“I need to tell you I love you. I almost lost you today. If that snowboard had hit your head, I would never have had the chance to say it.”
“But Charlie would be okay, instead of me.”
“I don’t want Charlie to be okay instead of you. I want both of you to be okay. You know, Charlie risked her life for you today because she loves you, too.”
“B-but wh-what if sh-she dies?” Jace sobbed out the words.
“Oh, Jace... It would be so awful if Charlie died. But Papa Steven just told me our job is to believe she’s going to be okay. So that’s what we’re going to do. We’re going to believe, and we’re going to pray. Okay?” He let his own tears stream down his face, without bothering to wipe them off.
“I’m s-sorry I f-fell and I w-wouldn’t let Charlie h-help me up. Th-that’s why I w-was in the w-way.”
“No, Jace. It wasn’t your fault—it was just a crazy accident. And we can’t have you feeling all guilty about something that wasn’t your fault. Charlie would hate that. Anyway, she was so proud of you for being independent. She told me she loved the way you insisted on getting up without any help.”
“But I don’t w-want her to d-die.”
“She won’t. Okay? She won’t die—I won’t let her.” Josh hugged him tight, wondering how he was going to keep his promise, hating his helplessness all the more.
AN ETERNITY PASSED before the doors opened and the surgeon came out, calling for the Best family. The entire group rushed to surround him. Anne was holding Steven’s hand, and he grimaced at the force of her squeeze.
“Sorry,” she whispered.
She tried to understand what the doctor was saying to Brad. She caught a few important words, “critical, but stable.” Only then did she realize she’d been holding her breath. Tears of relief flowed down her cheeks. She’d been more afraid than she’d admitted out loud, feeling the need to be strong for Emily.
“She was really lucky this happened with an emergency physician around. Otherwise I doubt she would have survived long enough to get to the emergency room. But if the aorta had been totally transected, there’s nothing any of us could have done. As it is, we’ve given her five pints of blood.”
“What’s the extent of damage to the other organs?” Josh asked.
The doctor directed his answer to Brad. “As I was saying... she lost a lot of blood. Some of that blood came from her aorta, and some from her other lacerations. We had to remove her spleen. And of course, we already knew her lung was damaged. Her overall prognosis is good, but the next twenty-four hours will be critical.”
“When can we see her?” asked Anne.
“She’ll be in Critical Care, so we only let immediate family in, one or two at a time.”
“We’re her parents, and this is her sister and brother-in-law.”
“That’s fine. You can just tell the nurse in CCU. But not all at once.”
“I need to see her,” Josh choked out.
The doctor glared at him, eyes like flint. “I’m sorry, Dr. Branson. You must realize we can’t give you privileges at this hospital. As long as she’s in CCU, visitors will be restricted to immediate family.”
Purple blood vessels stood out on the side of Josh’s forehead. He took a step toward the surgeon, but Brad put a restraining hand on his arm.
“He’s her fiancé,” said Brad.
“Fiancé? Really?” He narrowed his eyes at Josh, who hesitated, but then nodded his head.
Anne heard Derek chuckling behind her, and turned to shush him, kicking her foot playfully in his direction.
“Fine. You can see her,” the doctor replied in a brusque tone, glaring at Josh. “But you’re not looking at her records!”
When Josh turned around, Anne thought she’d never seen his face quite so red. No one spoke, but some of the group were biting back smiles.
“What?” He marched across the room and escaped outside.
“He’s marrying Charlie now,” said Olivia. “I guess this means I’m officially off the hook.”
“I’M SORRY, SIR...” The nurse clicked off the computer screen.
“Dr. Branson,” Josh corrected.
“I know. I’m sorry Dr. Branson. I can’t let you see it.”
“Sally? Was that your name? Sally, I won’t do anything. I just need to take a quick look.”
“I’m sorry, but Dr. Garrett gave me strict instructions not to show you her records.”
“That’s ridiculous! I just want to see her blood counts and review the medications. I’m not telling anyone what to actually prescribe.”
“I’m sorry...” she said, her face white as she backed from the room.
“I’ll take it from here,” said a voice in the hallway.
“Thank you Dr. Sommers.” Her tense face relaxed as she fled the room, retreating to her station.
“Hello, I don’t think we’ve met,” said a tall, gray-haired man, with a smile that crinkled around his eyes. He stuck out his hand. “I’m Dr. Sommers. Ted Sommers.”
“Dr. Branson.” Josh shook his hand, watching him with wary eyes.
“Yes,” he chuckled. “I know who you are. You made quite a scene this afternoon, as I understand it.” He looked at his watch. “Or, I guess that was yesterday afternoon, since it’s one a.m.”
“I was only trying to—”
“I know, Dr. Branson. I know you’re only trying to help. And I’ve been in your shoes before. I know exactly how you feel.” His tone was gentle and kind.
“I doubt it,” Josh muttered.
“Come now. Surely, you don’t think you’re the only man who ever thought he was losing the woman he loved? And it’s even worse in our profession, because we somehow think we’re ultimately responsible.”
Dr. Sommers walked over to Charlie’s bed, where she was lying unconscious. “I can see why you love her, and I haven’t even met her yet. Is she as beautiful inside as out?”
Josh gazed at her face, unmarred by the accident. Except for the nasal cannula, she could have been resting at home in bed. Like sleeping beauty. “Yes, she is. She threw herself in front of an irresponsible snowboarder to save my nephew’s life.”
“She seems to be an amazing girl. And I can see you love her very much.” He picked up the laptop computer. “Now, if you’d like, we’ll sit on the couch together and review her chart. I haven’t gotten to read it yet.”
“I thought Dr. Garrett said—”
“Yes, yes,” He waved his hand about. “Dr. Garrett doesn’t want you to see her records. But I’ve been doing this a long time, and I’m not as insecure or as easily offended as Dr. Garrett.” He smiled again. “Besides, I have a feeling no one could be more motivated to save this young woman’s life than you, Dr. Branson.”
“It’s Josh.” He sat down beside the older doctor as he felt the tension ease in his chest. “Thank you so much, Dr. Sommers.”
“It’s Ted.”
After scrutinizing every word, Josh sat back and sighed, almost disappointed. “It’s exactly what I would have prescribed.”
Ted chuckled. “That doesn’t mean you’re not useful, here. You have an even more important role than being her doctor. You’re her reason to live. When is the wedding?”
Josh felt his face burning. “If I confess something, will you promise not to throw me out?”
“Go right ahead. If I hadn’t gotten into medical school, I was going to be a priest.”
“I haven’t actually asked her yet.”
“I see. But you’ve talked about it, right?”
“Uhmm... It’s complicated.”
“But you do plan to marry her?”
“Yes, of course.”
“Well, at least she knows you love her, even if you haven’t said the ‘M’ word. Right?”
“Uhmm... It’s complicated. You see, I told her I loved her two years ago, but she didn’t believe me.”
Ted sat back, plainly bemused. “
Let me get this straight. Two years ago you told her you loved her, and she clearly didn’t believe you? And you haven’t told her again since then?”
“No, but I told her I’d be waiting for her if she changed her mind about me. And I’ve been trying to be the kind of man who deserves her.”
His eyebrows flew up. “So for two years...”
“She was living in another state. That’s why I didn’t push her.”
“I would say you’ve taken ‘not pushing her’ to a new extreme,” he remarked drolly.
Josh dropped his face into his hands. “I know. I know it was stupid. And then yesterday, I almost lost her...”
“So what’s holding you back now? Is she in love with someone else?”
“No, it’s not that. There was a complication. I thought I had a responsibility that would keep us apart. But now I know she’s more important.”
“And so, when she wakes up, you’re planning to tell her? Is that why you’re so nervous?”
Josh nodded his head, struggling to find a drop of saliva to wet his cottony mouth.
Ted chuckled. “Even the greatest of men is brought to his knees in the face of love.”
“You’re so right. It’s awful. I’m way more nervous than when I took my board exams.”
“Okay, I’ll make a deal with you. I won’t tell anyone you’re not her fiancé yet, if you won’t frighten my nurses anymore.”
“I wasn’t trying to scare her.”
“I know. But you need to look in the mirror. You’re pretty terrifying with that scowl you have on. You’re going to scare poor Charlotte to death when she finally wakes up.”
“IS THAT HIM?” WHISPERED the young nurse in the doorway, staring with huge round eyes at Josh. He’d fallen asleep sitting beside Charlie, slumped forward with his head on her bed, his arm draped across her. “He doesn’t look scary.”
“Well, he was really scary at first, but he’s been nicer since Dr. Sommers talked to him,” the older nurse replied. “It’s kind of sweet, actually. They’re engaged. And the story is she risked her life to save some little boy. She got hit by a snowboard.”
“He looks cute,” said the girl, peeking in the doorway. She could just make out his face. “What color are his eyes?”
“They’re green. And yes, he’s really cute. But didn’t you hear me? They’re engaged.”
“Yes, but I’ve got a little window of time while she’s asleep.”
“Eva!” said the older woman, with obvious shock and disapproval.
“Sally, you’re so gullible. I’m just teasing. I think it’s very romantic. He’s been there all night?”
“He hasn’t left her side. Refused to even sleep on the couch.”
“What about the girl... Let’s see...” She looked at the chart. “Charlotte? How are her vitals? Anything unexpected?”
“Dr. Garrett said she should’ve woken up by now, but Dr. Sommers isn’t too worried about it. So far, her vitals have been good. As soon as she wakes up though, she’s going to be in pain. You’ll need to set her up on the PCA.”
“Okay. Hopefully, he’ll need me for something while I’m on shift.” Eva made a dreamy face. “Dr. and Mrs. Eva Branson—it has such a nice ring to it.”
This time Sally laughed with her as they exited the room. Neither one noticed Charlie’s eyes as they fluttered open.
Chapter Fourteen
CHARLIE WAS AWARE OF only one thing. She was dying. She’d never felt such terrible pain before. She started to move but the pain worsened, so intense she tried to lie perfectly still. As her eyes began to focus, she could see the ceiling above her. Experimentally, she turned her head and found her neck didn’t hurt. She could see she was in a hospital. But why? What had happened? The excruciating pain seemed to be centered in her chest. She knew she was dying of a heart attack. She wanted to call out for help but with every breath bringing new agony she couldn’t even speak.
Her gaze roamed the room in a frantic search for help, finally coming to rest on a sleeping figure whose head rested on her bed... Josh. Could she get his attention? She managed to whisper his name, but found her throat was dry and raspy. And something was over her mouth and nose. She couldn’t dislodge it. She heard a voice, a moan. Where was the noise coming from? Was it her?
Josh woke abruptly at the sound. “Charlie?” He jumped up and moved to bend over her. “Hey! You’re awake! I’m so glad you’re awake. We were all worried. And... and I need to talk to you... Charlie? You’re crying! What’s wrong, baby? Are you scared?”
She shook her head. She tried to talk, but the only sound she could make was a whimper of pain.
“Does it hurt? Are you in pain?”
Her nod was vigorous. She had to tell him. She whispered, and he put his ear next to her mouth to understand, but no intelligible sounds emerged through the obstruction on her face. She moaned again.
“Hang on, baby. Let me lift this mask a little bit, so I can hear you.”
As the mask was pulled away, she rasped out a few desperate words. “Josh. I’m dying... my chest...”
“No baby, you’re not dying. You had surgery. I know it hurts, but we’ll fix it.” He punched the nurse’s call button multiple times. “Hang in there. I know it hurts.”
The nurse came running into the room. “Is she awake?”
“Yes, and she needs pain meds, stat.”
She spoke soothingly to Charlie as she prepped the needle. “Hi, Charlotte. My name is Eva. I’m your nurse, and I’m going to get you out of pain. This is morphine, and it’s going to make you feel better.” She began to inject into her IV. “And we’re going to set you up with a little button you can push to get more pain medication when you need it. Okay?”
Charlie’s muscles relaxed as the morphine took effect, easing the pain.
Eva checked to ensure all the instrument readings were acceptable. “Feeling better?”
She nodded, concentrating on taking shallow breaths as Eva fiddled with a machine and placed a button in her hand.
“Do you remember going into surgery?”
“She’s been unconscious since she arrived in the ambulance,” Josh explained. “I don’t know what she remembers.”
Charlie was irritated she couldn’t communicate. She tried to talk, and pointed to her mouth, again covered by the bulky mask.
The nurse removed the mask. “I can take this off for a few minutes, but we’ll need to leave it on most of the time.”
Charlie croaked out, “Something’s in my throat.”
“Yes,” Eva explained. “You’ve got a little tube down your throat—a nasogastric tube. But I can give get you some ice chips.”
Josh frowned. “I’m going to explain it all to her in a minute. I only needed you to get her out of pain. We’ll be okay now.”
“Okay. Let me just check her chest tube before I go.”
Eva pulled down the blanket and started to uncover Charlie’s chest. She panicked—the nurse was going to expose her in front of Josh. “No!” she squeaked.
“What’s wrong?” Eva asked. “Is something hurting?”
With the small amount of air she could gather, Charlie whispered, “Not in front of him.” She could feel her face heating up.
Eva chuckled. “But he’s a doctor. I promise, he’s seen breasts before.”
“Not mine.”
“But he’s your fiancé,” said Eva. “Haven’t you ever... uhmm...”
“What?” Her heart pounded in her chest, setting off a fresh round of pain.
“We’re waiting until after we’re married,” Josh said.
“You are?” Eva’s eyes were as round as her mouth.
“Nurse, would you mind if we checked the chest tube later? I need to explain some things to Charlie. There’s a lot she doesn’t remember.”
“Okay, Dr. Branson. I’ll come back in ten minutes. And if you need me before then, just call.” She smiled at Josh as she left the room. Was she batting her eyes at him?
Jo
sh moved to stand beside Charlie’s unbandaged arm, picking up her hand and cradling it between his.
“I’m sorry, Charlie. It was the only way they would let me stay with you. Brad told them we were engaged.”
She was so confused. Her voice cracked as she forced out the words, “What happened to me?”
“Do you remember we were all skiing together? And we were taking pictures of the jumps?”
She nodded. The memory was vivid. She could even see the jumps clearly in her mind.
“Do you remember Jace jumping?”
“Yes. He made it. Right?” Even the effort of whispering made her grimace with pain.
“Do you remember him falling down afterward, and you saw a snowboarder coming to take the jump? And he was going to hit Jace?”
Her heart started racing. Jace must have been injured. That must be why Josh was here with her now. She whispered, “Is Jace okay?”
“Jace is fine. You don’t remember? You ran in front of the snowboarder when he jumped. Do you remember that? And he hit you. Remember?”
Charlie wracked her brain, but the story didn’t seem familiar. “Is the snowboarder okay?”
He dropped her hand and pulled on his hair. “You’re not okay. All right? Everyone else is fine. But you almost died. In fact, you did die—you quit breathing, your heart quit beating, and you lost half of your blood volume. You have broken bones, and you lost your spleen and lacerated your lungs and cut your brachial artery and your descending aorta. And you had surgery, and that’s why you hurt like hell.”
Huge tears welled up in her eyes. Josh was so angry with her. She must have done something really stupid.
“I’m s-sorry.” A sob escaped causing so much agony she cried even more.
Josh grabbed her hand again, squeezing while he pleaded with her, “Please don’t cry. Please. Why are you apologizing?”
“Y-you’re m-mad.”
“I’m not mad, Charlie. Why would I be mad?” He smoothed her hair away from her face with a gentle touch. “You saved Jace’s life, but you almost got yourself killed doing it. I was just afraid.”