A Family Affair: Fall

by Mary Campisi

  “That’s Jeremy’s recipe. Seems like the whole town knows what he’s doing but you.” He paused, debated whether he should voice his thoughts, decided on it. “Do you think his mother knows?” Ben would guess she did.

  “Maybe.” The word slipped out, soft, uncertain.

  Ben nodded. “Yeah, maybe so.”

  “Can you call Jeremy in here? I need to talk to him.”

  “Sure.” Ben opened the door and went to find him. If all went well, Jeremy would be looking for a new line of work very soon. “Jeremy?”

  “He left ten minutes ago,” Mrs. Olsteroff said, her thin face pulled into a frown. “That boy was in an awful hurry and upset. Said he was going someplace where nobody could bother him.”

  ***

  Jeremy Ross Dean had been missing for nine hours. News of his disappearance spread through Magdalena faster than Japanese beetles on a zinnia. Some blamed Rudy Dean for being too harsh with the boy, said there was no way he could live up to the old man’s expectations, and sooner or later, the boy would crack. Some blamed Jeremy’s mother, Sueanne, said she was too soft on her only son, protected him from anything the least bit uncomfortable. And then there were some who said everything was fine and would have continued on just fine if not for the interference of Ben Reed. An outsider. A stranger. A person who had no business interfering with the goings-on in the community.

  Gina fit into the last category. From the second he’d opened his door at the Heart Sent, she’d lambasted him with comments about minding his own business and insinuating himself in family situations he didn’t understand. Okay, he got it. He should have gone easier on Jeremy, given Rudy Dean a pass in the hard-ass department, but neither the boy or his father was very forthcoming with their motives, and Ben was a fixer, couldn’t stand to sit around and watch someone swallowed up in their own misery. But Gina didn’t see it that way—not at all.

  The passion in her voice tore at his gut, but the anger and disappointment on her face flattened him. So what if he’d fallen short of her expectations? He tried to make her see he’d meant no harm to the boy. “I was trying to encourage him to stick up for himself and live his own life. Was that so wrong?”

  “No, but the way you went about it was.”

  Ben sighed. “What’s with this town? You’re all supposed to be a community; big on family and support, but everybody’s got a side deal going on. I’ll bet everybody in this town knew Jeremy was cooking for Mimi and Lina’s and who knows where else? I’ll even bet his mother knew.” When Gina blushed and looked away, Ben latched onto that. “See what I’m saying? The only one who didn’t know was his old man. What kind of screwed-up loyalty is that?”

  She shrugged. “I don’t know. It makes sense when you’re in the middle of it, but maybe all it does is prolong the inevitable of owning up to the truth.”

  Yeah, there was the truth. Ben had his own share of truths to divulge and he had to do it soon, because the more time he spent with Gina, the more he hated that she didn’t know the real reason he’d come to Magdalena. Once he told her, he’d also tell her of his decision to stay and that it had to do with her. He pulled her into his arms, held her. “Where would a kid go who’s never been much farther than the outskirts of town?”

  “I don’t know. Anger makes people do crazy things.”

  He stroked her hair, wished he hadn’t pushed Jeremy so hard. Where could the kid be? What if he’d driven out of town and panicked? He could be on the side of the road somewhere. “I think I’m going to head out of town, drive around a bit.”

  Gina eased away, looked into his face. “I’ll come with you.” She touched his cheek. “He’ll be okay, Ben. You’ll see.”

  Two and a half hours later, Ben knew why people chose not to have children. It was the damn worrying that did them in, creased their foreheads, and gave them indigestion and a permanent scowl. They’d driven ten miles outside of Magdalena, stopped and asked folks if they’d seen a young man of Jeremy’s description or a late model Jeep Wrangler. Nothing. Not one bite. When Ben checked in with Rudy Dean to tell him what he and Gina had done, the man sounded drained and anxious, nothing like the hard-ass who’d been riding him since he joined the force.

  And that’s what having a kid did to a person. It stripped them of their identity, humbled them, maybe even humiliated them. Why the hell did people have kids anyway? There must be some redeeming factor; at least, that’s what all new parents probably believed. Did Melissa believe that? She and Kenneth would find out soon enough. Ben rubbed his jaw and slid a glance at Gina, who rode beside him, eyes closed, her nearness filling his senses. Could he ever deal with that kind of uncertainty and continual worry? Maybe if he didn’t have to go through it alone it would make a difference. Maybe…

  Gina yawned and murmured in a sleepy voice, “Are we going home?”

  Home. He liked the sound of that. “Yeah, we’re going home.”

  At 8:37 the next morning, Jeremy walked into the Magdalena Police Department, looking disheveled and worn out, his left eye a deeper purple than yesterday. “Hi, Ben. Is the chief in?”

  Ben jumped up from behind his desk and made his way to the boy. “Where the hell have you been? We’ve been looking all over for you.”

  “Huh?” He scratched his head, frowned. “I needed time to think. Why were you looking for me?”

  Was he serious? He’d better not be or Ben would be pissed at the kid’s ignorance as well as his lack of consideration for the people who cared about him. “We were looking for you because you had an argument with your father, got a black eye you refused to discuss, and when I confronted you about it, you stormed off.”

  Jeremy shrugged, shoved his hands in his pockets. “Yeah, I guess I was a little pissed.”

  “Go see your father right now. He’s worried sick about you, and call your mother.” Damn, but he sounded like a parent. When the boy hesitated, Ben sighed and said, “You’re going to have to grow up, kid. Come on.” He headed toward Rudy’s office, popped his head in, and said, “Somebody wants to see you.”

  When Rudy spotted his son, he gave a shout and sprang out of his chair. “Thank God, thank God.” He thrust his big arms around his son and murmured once again, “Thank God.”

  Jeremy clung to his father, his lanky body swallowed up by Rudy’s sturdy one. “Dad?” Jeremy eased away, looked him straight in the eye, and said, “I’m sorry I worried you. I had some things to sort out.”

  “Where the hell have you been?” Rudy’s gruffness took over, spilling into his words.

  “Out past Will Carrick’s place. I slept out there last night.”

  His father scratched his jaw and said, “You were in the woods?”

  “Yeah. And I did a lot of thinking.”

  “You did, huh?”

  Let him talk, Rudy. Don’t screw this up. Ben cleared his throat and shot the older man a warning look.

  Jeremy nodded and said in a quiet voice, “It’s time I grew up and turned responsible.”

  Come on, Rudy, you can do this.

  “And, how would you do that, son?”

  The boy smiled. “By becoming good police.” He paused, added, “The best.”

  Rudy cocked his head to the side, studied his son. “The best, huh?”

  “Yes, sir.” The boy squared his shoulders, puffed out his chest. “I’ll do you proud.”

  Rudy sighed. “Well, that could be a problem.”

  “Sir?”

  Don’t do this, Rudy. Ben shook his head. Don’t turn into a hard-ass now. Don’t do it.

  “You see, I don’t think you could be the best. I think you’d try, but if you’re gonna be the best at something, it’s got to come from here—” he jabbed his chest “—deep inside, like a burning that won’t let up.” He shook his head, sighed again. “You don’t have it, son. You never will.”

  Jeremy bit his bottom lip, glanced at Ben who was seconds away from shooting a string of curses at Rudy with enough heat to singe him. What the hell was th
e matter with the guy? No wonder he didn’t have a relationship with his own kid. How could he when—

  “You see, you’ve got other talents, ones I didn’t understand until the other day.” He paused, smiled. “Did you really make that chicken pot pie at Lina’s?”

  Jeremy blanched. “Sir?”

  “And is it true you’ve been cooking for Mimi?”

  The boy took a step back, hesitated. “Yes. Sir.”

  “You don’t belong here, son. You belong in a kitchen, filling our bellies, making pot pies and fancy dishes I can’t pronounce.”

  “But…what about this?” He waved a hand at the office.

  “This is my dream,” Rudy said. “Not yours. Now go call your mother and tell her you’re okay. Then go home, take a shower, and get started on your lists.”

  “Lists?”

  “Yeah, job lists. And once you get a job, it’s time to start paying rent.”

  Chapter 14

  Gina buried her face in the pillow and breathed in Ben’s scent. Would she ever tire of waking up next to him? Of touching him? Last night, they’d made love with such urgency and need, she’d almost cried. When they weren’t together, she thought of him; when they were together, she thought of him…he’d started to consume her, and while she didn’t like to admit that, it was the truth. She’d caught him watching her, his gaze fierce and possessive, making her wonder if he didn’t feel the same way.

  Was this what happened when you opened up to someone, trusted him?

  Loved him?

  The last thought skittered across her brain. Did she love Ben? She knew the answer, didn’t even need to dissect the question the way she analyzed 97 percent of her life. Yes. Yes, she loved him.

  Oh, dear Lord, now what? Her stomach jumped and gurgled with anxiety and apprehension. She glanced at the door. He’d be back from Mimi’s kitchen soon, carrying coffee and whatever breakfast goodies he’d concocted, and she doubted she’d be able to eat a crust of dry toast.

  Ben’s phone beeped, distracting her from her dilemma. They’d have to have a chat about “no cell phones” in the bedroom unless he was expecting a call from work. Other than that, when they were in the bedroom, he was hers and she wasn’t going to share him. The phone beeped again, indicating a text message, and ten seconds later, yet again. Gina glanced at the phone on the nightstand. Was something wrong? Should she take a quick peek to make sure there wasn’t? As she debated the wisdom of checking Ben’s text messages, the phone beeped two more times. Gina snatched the phone and read the stream of messages on Ben’s phone.

  Melissa had a boy. I went to see her.

  Think she really loves Kenneth. Sorry.

  Don’t think it’s going to happen between you two.

  When are you coming home? Miss you!

  Gina still held the phone in her hand when Ben opened the door, carrying a tray full of coffee and food. “Hey, sleepyhead, hope you’re hungry.”

  She took in the easy smile, the warm gaze covering her, the muscled body, all of it. Why did people always sound the most genuine seconds before they broke your heart? “Actually, I’m not.” Gina slipped out of bed and snatched her clothes from the chair. She’d stopped feeling embarrassed about her nakedness, had believed his story that he loved her body just as it was. She stepped into her panties, then fastened her bra. Had that all been a lie, too?

  “Hey, what are you doing?”

  He looked confused and if she had to toss out another description, she’d say “nervous.” But why? What could a man like Ben Reed have to be nervous about? Unless he weren’t telling the truth and feared he’d be discovered. She ignored him, pulled on her jeans, eased into her shirt.

  “Gina?” He set the tray on the bed and clasped her arms to stop her from buttoning her shirt. “What’s going on? Talk to me.”

  She did not want to look into that face, see those blue eyes that would haunt her for too many nights to come. What was the point? Better to get it out and over with, but she hesitated. Once she spoke, everything would change. It would be real. Could she let it go and wait, see if he told her about this Melissa and the baby and the man named Kenneth? Of course not. She wanted to know Ben’s part in all of this, and why his cousin still thought his home was in Philly.

  She wanted the truth and she was going to get it. “Who’s Melissa?”

  “What?” His tanned face paled, his expression turned grim.

  “Melissa. Who is she?” Gina shrugged out of his grip. “You got a text from your cousin, several in fact. I was worried it might be work, but…it wasn’t.” He reached for her but she stepped back. “Don’t.

  “Look, I can explain.”

  “Oh? Why do you feel the need to explain when you don’t even know what your cousin wanted.” Pause. “Or do you? Hmm. I’m guessing you do know or you wouldn’t look like you were about to throw up. So, who’s Melissa?”

  The left side of his jaw twitched, three times, before he said, “My ex-wife.”

  Ex-wife. She recalled the other texts from Ben’s cousin, the more incriminating ones. Think she really loves Kenneth. Sorry. Don’t think it’s going to happen between you two.

  He glanced at the bed, spotted his cell phone, and grabbed it, then proceeded to read the messages. “Damn it. Gina—”

  “Stop. I read them. It doesn’t take a neurosurgeon to figure out your ex-wife is in love with Kenneth, and you’re still in love with your ex-wife.”

  “No!” He shook his head, grasped her shoulders. “That’s not true.” He pierced her with those damn blue eyes and said, “I love you, you, Gina. Nobody else.”

  How tragically pathetic that she’d waited her whole life to hear those words and when they finally came, they were riddled with lies. Again. “Why couldn’t you have left me alone?” She pushed his hands away and stepped back. “I might not have been deliriously happy, but I was content. There’s a lot to say for being content. I wish you’d just left me alone instead of pretending you cared.”

  “I do care.” He held out his hands, palms up, eyes bright, voice hoarse. “I love you. Please believe that.”

  “Hah. Your cousin thinks you’re going ‘home’ to Philly. Now why would she think that, Ben? Huh? Because that’s what you told her, isn’t it?” She slashed a hand in the air. “Were we all diversions until you figured out a plan to get your ex-wife back?”

  “No.” But the word faltered, slipped a notch or two.

  “Right.”

  “Okay, at first I just wanted to find a place to hide out for a while until I got my head together and could figure out a way to get back to Philly.”

  This was not what she wanted to hear, and yet, it was exactly what she needed to hear if it were the truth, and Gina had a sick feeling these were some of the truest words Ben Reed had ever spoken. “What did you do, get kicked out of town?”

  The scarlet creeping up his neck to his cheeks told the story before he did. “Pretty much. I got into it with Melissa’s boyfriend and I ended up breaking his nose.” He dragged a hand over his face, sighed. “I could either leave town or get charged with assault. So, I decided to leave town.” He paused. “That’s when I called Cash…”

  Damn him. “You used all of us to suit your own needs. And everything you did while you were here was just a way to pass time, wasn’t it?” I was just a way to pass time. I didn’t mean anything to you.

  “I told you that’s not true. Maybe it was at first, but then things changed.” He gentled his voice. “We happened.”

  Gina bit her lip, hissed, “There is no we; there was never a we, not when you’re sleeping with one woman and wishing you were with another.”

  “I know I screwed up, no denial there, but do not try to tell me how I feel. I love you,” he spat out as though he were annoyed to admit it. “You, Gina Servetti.”

  Years from now she would remember these words, pull them out and replay them, lingering on the inflection in his voice, the fierce expression on his face as he spoke. She would hang onto
them because that was all she had left. “You had weeks to tell me the truth. I shared with you, opened up about my mother and father, even my old boyfriend, and what did you share with me? The fact that you didn’t know your father and your mother left you? That’s it. You didn’t want to talk about your ex-wife, didn’t even want to tell me you had one. The opportunities were there, Ben, but you shut them down. Had you told me the truth about why you were here, I wouldn’t have liked it, but we would have gotten through it. Instead, I had to find out myself.”

  “I know. Damn it, I know.” He dragged a hand over his face. “Ask me anything and I’ll tell you. Okay? Give me another chance. Please.”

  Gina was certain this was as close to begging as he’d ever come, and yet, it didn’t matter. Not now. It only mattered before. “I’m sorry. It’s too late. Good-bye, Ben.”

  As she closed the door and left Ben Reed and the Heart Sent, there was no way she could know that in twelve days, two days after Ben left Magdalena, she would fail the biggest test of her life—a pregnancy test.

  ***

  “Are you sure you don’t want me to talk to her? I can be mighty persuasive when I set my mind to it.”

  Ben had heard stories about Mimi’s persuasive abilities, especially when it came to convincing a would-be troublemaker to “straighten out or risk a long road of heartache at the hands of the law.” Those were the words she used on them, and most of the time they worked. But Gina wasn’t a would-be troublemaker, unless they were talking about the destruction she’d caused to his heart. “Thanks, Mimi, but she was pretty clear. It’s over.”

  “When you’re in love like you two are, it’s never over, even when you say it is.”

  He sipped his beer, pondered her words. It had been three days since Gina walked out of his life. Ben had spent the first two in denial, but on the third day with Gina’s scent fading from his pillow, he knew she wouldn’t be back. That’s when he’d done something the old Ben Reed never would have done; he spilled the whole story to Mimi, including why he’d really come to Magdalena and ending with Gina tossing his “I love you” back in his face.