by Alice Raine
‘Submit to me, Robyn,’ he demanded, his voice now low and compelling.
‘Y-you said no strings,’ I argued weakly, well aware just how late my pathetic statement was.
‘I did, but I’ve changed my mind. You’re too beautiful, and the connection between us is far too good to pass up.’ With those complimentary words he lowered his head and placed a hot, open-mouthed kiss on my neck that had me groaning in his arms and almost begging for round two.
It was completely crazy, but I was actually considering saying yes. He made me feel incredible, and safe, and cared for. It helped that my climax had also been out of this world. Would it really be so bad to try a relationship with him? Just because I’d never stepped beyond vanilla before didn’t mean I wouldn’t enjoy it.
‘Let me show you how good this lifestyle can be. Let me show you how good sex can be, when you really open yourself up to the possibilities.’
It was these words that finally brought a fragment of my sanity back, because he wasn’t talking about a relationship at all. He didn’t say, “we’d be incredible together”, or, “what a great couple we’d make”. He said, “let me show you how good sex can be”.
Oliver wanted me for sex. Nothing else. And as tempting as this dark, domineering man might make that seem, I was still traditional in my views. I needed romance to let down my barriers with someone sexually. At least I’d thought I did until about ten minutes ago. Being this close to Oliver was making it impossible to think straight.
Coming to my senses, I started to wriggle in his embrace. ‘No … Oliver … I can’t. I’m sorry.’
‘Can’t, or won’t?’ he whispered, as his lips fell to my shoulder again and laid one single kiss on the skin.
It was tempting to give in.
My eyes fluttered shut as warmth danced across my skin, and even though I’d only just climaxed I felt my core clench again in invitation for more of his sinful touch.
God, it was so tempting.
But no. This was crazy. I knew nothing about this lifestyle, but I knew enough about myself to know that I would fall head over heels for this guy if I gave him a chance, and that was not something I could risk.
‘I can’t. I need to go,’ I reiterated, pushing at his forearm again, which he finally removed, freeing me.
I missed his warmth immediately, and staggered slightly as I made my way towards my jacket and bag. He didn’t try to catch me this time, or help to steady me and ease my embarrassment, though. Instead, an awkward silence fell between us as I pulled my coat on, then I finally plucked up enough courage to turn and face him.
He was examining his arm, and to my horror, as I looked down I saw several dark red scratch marks on his skin from where I’d grasped at him in the height of my passion. ‘It’s not usually me who wears the marks after a scene,’ he remarked in a low tone, and even though I knew I should apologise, I couldn’t get my voice box to function.
Pulling in a deep breath, he began rolling his shirt sleeves down, but his eyes rose and fixed on me, his gaze intent, but oddly detached. He was utterly infuriating – his expressions gave absolutely nothing away.
Once he’d shrugged into his suit jacket, he straightened the sleeves then buttoned the front, seeming to make me wait while he settled his clothes to his satisfaction. Finally, he looked up again, impeccable and untouchable, his armour well and truly back in place. ‘Will I see you again?’ he murmured.
Embarrassed heat flooded my cheeks, and I squirmed on the spot, trying not to think about how he’d just reduced me to an orgasmic bundle in his arms, but I cleared my throat and shook my head. ‘Umm, no. I think I’ve done quite enough “research” for now …’
Risking a glance at him I saw a flash of something cross his face before he smoothed his expression and gave one single tight nod. Had that been a trace of disappointment in his features?
Pah! Who was I kidding? He was so controlled that I seriously doubted he actually had one emotional bone in his entire body.
He walked briskly to the door and pulled it open, pausing to wave his arm at the gap and indicate that he wanted me gone. ‘Goodbye then, Robyn with a y.’
Nodding jerkily, I managed to persuade my wobbly legs into action and made it past him, absorbing one final inhale of his scent as I went. Just as I turned to say something, anything, to make this less awkward, he closed the door in my face. I was left staring at the solid wood, feeling decidedly close to tears, although I couldn’t for the life of me identify why.
Chapter Fifteen
Oliver
Hijo de puta! I couldn’t believe I’d just pushed things with Robyn like that. Knowing she was completely new to this lifestyle, I should have taken my time, introduced her slowly, and allowed the allure of it all to seduce her. I could see her temptation; it would only have been a matter of time until she had given in to it.
But no. I’d allowed my attraction to her to overwhelm me and taken things to the next level, even though I’d promised her I wouldn’t.
Throwing my hands up into the air, I let out a low growl of annoyance. She might only have known vanilla up to now, but she was a natural sub, I was sure of it. Her responses to me had been almost instinctual, and so powerful. The way she’d immediately dropped to her knees … Dios … she’d been perfect.
I could do with a drink. It was a tempting prospect, but I didn’t head back down to the bar. Instead, I opted to raid the small fridge in my room and stay hidden in my office to give Robyn time to leave. I needed the space to cool off, and I didn’t want her to see me again and notice how upset I was. I kept my emotional side in check at all times – club members rarely got to see me lose my cool – so I certainly wouldn’t let Robyn know how much her refusal had aggravated me.
Having poured myself several fingers of whisky into a tumbler, I prowled around the room in agitated circles as I drank and dwelled on thoughts of Robyn.
I wanted her so badly that it burned in my system like a lit stick of dynamite, but she’d declined my offer. The irritating thing was, I was fairly certain that if I hadn’t just overstepped the mark I could have had her. She shared the attraction between us, I’d place money on that fact, and I knew she felt the explosive bond, too, because I’d seen it in her eyes. I’d never had a reaction like it, and from the few shocked gasps she’d emitted when we touched, I was fairly sure that it was a new experience for her as well.
But I had gone too far, greedy in my need to make her come, scaring her off with the intensity of it all, and now she was probably running home desperate to never see my face again.
I turned towards the panel of switches on the wall and banged my palm into the on button for the air conditioner then flicked the light off so I could stew in the calming darkness. The cool air washed over my heated skin from the unit above the door, and I leaned back on the wall as my eyes fluttered shut.
The way she had come undone in my arms instantly filled my mind. Dios. She’d been so affected by me that it had only taken the barest of touches to tip her over into her climax. And what a climax it had been! Her response had been flawless; back arching, skin heating, and the cry that had escaped her throat had been so sexy I’d nearly joined her and come in my trousers like a teenager. One thing was for sure; it would forever be engrained in my memory.
She wasn’t the only one affected by our connection, and as I adjusted the erection that was still tenting my trousers expectantly I grimaced. My dick obviously hadn’t caught up with the fact that Robyn was gone, even though my mind could think of nothing else.
I might have the reputation of being composed and level-headed around here, but Robyn had certainly made me lose it. The first girl to really stir my interest in years, and I’d scared her off by going too far too fast. I really was such a hot-headed fool.
Chapter Sixteen
Robyn
I dashed down the stairs, sprinted along the corridor lined with doors, and burst into the club like a gang of murderers were on my tail. As the thi
ck velvet curtain wafted around me like a cape, several people turned to look at me with wide eyes, and thankfully one of them was Sasha. Now if I could just spot Chloe we could get the hell out of here.
Frowning, Sasha immediately left the guy she was dancing with and dashed to my side. Gripping my arm in concern, she dragged me to a quieter area at the side of the dance floor. The wrong side for the exit.
‘Other way, we need to go,’ I pleaded, trying, and failing, to tug her back the way we’d come.
‘Not until you tell me why you’re as white as a sheet. What the hell happened, Rob?’
How the heck did I even begin to explain what had just happened? Closing my eyes, I drew in a deep breath to calm myself, but it didn’t work. All my screwed-up emotions and feelings were still lying on my shoulders like a tonne weight. Talking it through might help, and seeing as it was Sasha standing before me, I decided to suck up my courage and just tell her the truth. ‘I was upstairs with Oliver. He was showing me a few things to help me get a better understanding of what it was like to be a sub so I could use it for my book.’
‘And?’ Sasha made an impatient flapping gesture with her hand, clearly wanting me to speed up my tale. ‘Did he hurt you? I’ll fucking kill him if he did.’ From the expression on her face, I believed her, too.
‘No, no, nothing like that,’ I quickly reassured her.
‘So what is it, then? Didn’t you like it?’
I winced, and slumped my shoulders, feeling completely ashamed with what I was about to tell her. ‘The opposite. I think I liked it a bit too much,’ I confessed as a furious blush heated my cheeks.
Her eyes widened, and a filthy grin spread on her lips as she raised her hands and pumped a fist in the air in celebration. ‘Oh, I’m going to need more deets than that, Rob!’
Grimacing, I ran a hand through my hair, not surprised in the least to see that I was still shaking like a leaf. ‘He made me come,’ I blurted, before turning my eyes down towards the floor.
‘Holy fuck!’
‘Yeah.’ I sighed, trying to work out why I had reacted so potently to him, and coming up with nothing but the simple fact that it was him, pure and simple. Oliver Wolfe lit me up like an open flame to dynamite. ‘He was showing me some ready positions, so I was kneeling on the floor, still fully clothed, but he was trailing this crop over my body and God, Sasha, it was the hottest thing I’d ever experienced.’ Swallowing hard, I fanned my face as renewed heat surged around my body from the memory. ‘Then I panicked and stood up, but because I was so turned on my legs were wobbly, and he had to catch me to stop me from falling over. That’s when he …’ Clearing my throat, I tried to appear calm and cool as Sasha always did when discussing sex, but knew that I would probably fail miserably. ‘Well, that’s when he reached around me and touched between my legs. I was so turned on I climaxed almost instantly.’
‘Through your jeans? And you still came that easily?’
‘Yup.’ Even I couldn’t believe how quickly I’d come undone. It was like he had magic fingers or something.
‘Wow. That sounds hot!’
It was. It had been so hot that my brain had apparently melted in the process. There was one final revelation I had to make. ‘Then he asked me to submit to him.’ My voice was a whisper, but judging by the way Sasha’s eyes boggled, she’d heard me just fine.
‘Fuck! Like a one-time thing? Or be his permanent sub?’
‘I have no idea. We didn’t discuss it, I just walked away.’
‘You walked away?’
‘Well, I kind of stumbled. But yeah, I said no and left.’
‘Didn’t you enjoy it?’ She looked completely confused now.
Huffing out a breath, I struggled to comprehend my own feelings, let alone be able to explain them. ‘I did, but this stuff is kinky as hell. It’s hardly sensible to try and continue anything with him, is it?’
Sasha curled her lip in disgust at my words. ‘Fuck sensible! And as long as you enjoy it, who gives a shit if it’s kinky? As much as you might believe it, sex doesn’t always have to be in the missionary position, Robyn.’ She glared at me knowingly and then threw her hands up. ‘Just have some fun for a change.’ Which was exactly the response I’d expected from her.
Seeing my hesitation, she softened her expression and leaned in closer. ‘Look, are you attracted to him?’
A snort of laughter ripped up my throat as I rolled my eyes. ‘Um, yes. You’ve seen him, who wouldn’t be?’
Grinning, she wiggled her eyebrows. ‘He is hot, but I just had to check. And you like him, too?’
‘Yeah. I think that’s what’s holding me back. I like him, Sash, and I’m worried I’m going to fall for him, when all he wants is sex.’ I folded my arms and shrugged. ‘I don’t want to get hurt, and with the way he makes me feel I think Oliver could have the ability to well and truly break my heart.’
Sasha breathed out a long “wow” and nodded solemnly. ‘I totally get that, but from what Sam said last week I’m honestly not sure that Oliver just wants you for sex. Why would he suddenly make so much effort after years of not seeing anyone from the club? There’s got to be more to it.’ Pausing, she chewed on her lower lip for a second then gave me an intent look. ‘I see the look in your eye when you talk about him. Even if it is just sex, can you honestly walk away from him and have no regrets?’
Could I? Or would I forever be imagining what it would have been like to be with him, kneel for him, and share his bed? Fuck.
My silence must have spoken volumes, because Sasha made a sympathetic face and gave my shoulder a rub. ‘Why don’t you go back up there and ask him to be honest about what he wants. Then if it is just sex he’s after you can walk away?’
Chapter Seventeen
Oliver
I had no idea how long I stood in the dark of my office stewing over my stupidity, but a quiet knock on the door startled me into jumping around and dragging the door open in irritation. No doubt it was one of the club workers here to get my help with something that they could deal with themselves if they actually bothered. ‘What?’
But it wasn’t. The vision beyond the door was like my dream come true – it was Robyn. But instead of smiling at me like she had earlier, she was looking at me with wide, concerned eyes, probably because of the way I’d just snapped at her. Dios.
‘S-sorry … I’ll go …’
‘No!’ I was so desperate to keep her near that I practically shouted the single word and saw her flinch again as I did so. Pulling in a calming breath, I made the effort to quiet my volume, and smiled as I gestured with my arm into the office. ‘Come in. I’m sorry, I wasn’t expecting it to be you.’
Robyn looked hesitant and, without moving, glanced past my shoulder and frowned. ‘Why were you sitting in the dark?’
Reaching sideways, I flicked the switch that controlled the lamps and the room was once again filled with soft lighting. ‘I was irritated with myself, and the dark helps me think.’ Softening my voice, and my expression, I stood back and hoped she’d take the cue to enter. ‘I’m so glad you came back. I need to apologise to you. Please come in?’
Robyn blinked several times, apparently surprised by my words, but finally nodded and stepped past me. ‘I wanted to apologise, too. I shouldn’t have just run away like that.’
‘You have nothing to apologise for, Robyn, the fault was all mine.’ Closing the door, I turned and saw Robyn wrapping her arms around herself with a shudder, and realised the air con was still running. It was a habit from when I visited Spain. I liked it cool indoors, so I’d had the unit fitted here, but I knew that most Brits found my preferred temperature too cold. I flicked the switch to turn off the cold air then walked to my coat rack and pulled down a soft cashmere jumper before holding it out to her. ‘I can see you shivering. I had the a/c on. Here, you can wear this.’
Robyn accepted the jumper with a small thankful smile and tugged it on. The material completely swamped her, but there was no denying how adorabl
e she looked when her messy head of hair popped out of the neck hole. As much as I knew she might want distance from me at the moment, I just couldn’t help myself, and with a chuckle I moved to her side. Taking hold of one arm, I helped her roll the sleeves up, then brushed the wayward hairs back from her face.
My contact caused awareness to thicken the air, and once again our eyes met in shock at the crazy bond between us. I wanted to kiss her so badly that I had to clench my teeth to avoid the urge. Instead, I allowed my fingers to linger on her cheek for a second, rather enjoying both the feel of her soft skin, and the opportunity to look after her.
The need to care for and protect had always been an integral part of my dominant character, but usually the feelings were for my family members – being the eldest brother to five impetuous sisters could do that to a man. I was slightly taken aback by how strongly I felt it with Robyn, though, especially after knowing her for just a few weeks.
I hadn’t felt this protective or possessive over a woman for … well, for a very long time, but my little Robyn had sparked something within me, and, crazily, it felt like she was bringing me back to life. I couldn’t let that go. I couldn’t let her go. Not without a fight.
We seemed to be sharing a moment of some kind, but her wide eyes reminded me of her nerves, and so, with reluctance, I removed my hand from her cheek and gently guided her towards a chair, where she sank down, looking thankful to be off her feet.
I was so relieved she had come back tonight that my body felt alight with sensation, but still my dominant streak demanded that I remained at least some semblance of self-control, so instead of dragging her into my arms and inhaling her scent as I wanted, I sank to my haunches beside her so our eyes were level.
‘I can’t apologise enough for my behaviour, Robyn. I overstepped my boundaries, and it was utterly inappropriate of me.’ I was a proud man, but I had no issue with apologising when I knew I was in the wrong, and today, I had definitely been in the wrong, no matter how her responses had thrilled me at the time. ‘You placed your trust in me, and I abused that trust. A good dominant should never do that.’ Closing my eyes, I grimaced. ‘I’m appalled with myself,’ I admitted quietly, hoping she could hear the genuine remorse in my tone. ‘I allowed my overwhelming response to you to overrule my common sense.’ Feeling her come in my arms had been incredible, but not when I’d done it in such circumstances.