by Ashley Beale
When Pierce pulls away, he rips my shirt off, throwing it on the floor. He pulls back and lays me down on the seat and climbs over me. His eyes staring fiercely down into my own. "I really shouldn't."
"I know."
He leans down and kisses me some more. My legs part and he fits perfectly between them. His body rocks against mine, causing me to moan softly into his mouth. I start pulling his shirt up when he suddenly pulls away and looks around. "We can't do this here."
I look around too. I forgot I was in his damn truck, this sucks. But maybe it's for the best. Scratch that, it is for the best.
"We shouldn't." It's my turn to say it this time.
He smiles softly and places his forehead against mine. "I know."
I tilt my chin up so I'm kissing his lips. "What do we do?"
His hand finds the top of my jeans and he pulls on the button, then he slides his hand inside. Whoa, not what I was expecting. It keeps traveling under and slips under my panties and his finger touches my clit. "You come back to my place," he whispers. I don't say anything, I just stare at him. He dips a little lower, reaching the wetness between my legs, then brings it back up to my clit, where he rubs light circles.
My eyes roll back at the soft pleasuring he is doing. "Come to my place and let me show you exactly how much I've missed you Cassie."
My voice comes out wavered when I answer him. "Pierce, you know this is only going to confuse things."
He bites down on my jaw and his tongue flickers out. Somehow it turns me on more and my hands grip into his arms. "Ohh," I breathe out.
"Baby, we're meant to be confusing. I want to be inside you. I need to be inside you again. Please, come."
"I'm going to." I start grinding against his hand, and he adds a little more pressure. My body starts shaking under his touch and he brings his lips to my ears as I get off from his touch.
His breath feels cool and warm both at once as he speaks softly. "That isn't what I meant, but you look so damn good getting off."
As my breathing slows, he slips his hand back out and sucks on his fingers. "Mm, just how I remember."
I lay here, staring up at him, thinking about the words that didn't register until just now. We're meant to be confusing. It's sort of true. All our passion, our sex, our love, it's so much more intense because it's not figured out yet. We just seem to fit together the best when we're not meant to be together. I'm throwing away all my warning signs when it comes to Pierce. "Bring me back to your place."
He backs off me, hands me my shirt, and then helps me sit. I pull my shirt over my head and button my jeans as he cranks his truck and pulls out of the parking space. The drive back to his house is much shorter than it should be, but I don't mind because I'm just as anxious to have him in me. Although his fingers do a damn good job at getting me off, it's his hard cock I want.
We don't even make it through the door without stripping off some of our clothes. Before we're in his bedroom we're both completely naked. He throws me down on the bed and climbs on top of me, spreading my legs even wider. "I'm going to fuck you first, then I'll make love to you."
And he does.
Both of us fall back onto the bed when he gets me off for the fourth time. His hand remains high up on my thigh as he stares at me passionately. "Who was that girl in the restaurant?" I ask him softly.
He looks down at my body instead of at my face when he answers. "We went on a few dates, but I couldn't make it work with her. She just wasn't... you."
My heart accelerates speed at that sentence. "Oh, Pierce."
When his eyes meet mine again, they're hopeful. "I tried to move on for a little while. Don't be weirded out by this, but I kept tabs on you. That day in the restaurant, I had no idea you'd be there. I was there to tell Keri that I was done with her, that we weren't going to work out. I was honestly about to fight to be back in your life, but I was going to give you a little space first. Then as I was leaving the parking lot, I saw Avery pull in and I lost all hope. I still never saw her again, but once in a while I'd hear something about you or Avery, and I'd show up if I knew you'd be somewhere. I'm sorry if that is weird, I just needed to see you, even if I was killing myself in the process."
I reach up and run my hand along the side of his neck. "I've never wanted to hurt you. Either of you. I don't know how I got so twist turned into this situation, and I'm not sure how I screwed it up again. Just know, I've never meant to hurt either of you. I do love you both, I do. They're different types of love, yet they're the same. I feel like I belong to Avery, like he is my soul mate, but at the same time, there is this connection with you that is undeniable and strong. You're always tucked away somewhere in my mind and I can't shake it. I'd be lost without you, Pierce, but I'd also be lost with Avery."
"I get it."
"I wish I did."
He brings me to him and holds me close. "It'll all work itself out baby girl, I promise."
I can hear a vibration and I look at his face. "Do you hear that?"
He smiles. "I think it's one of our phones."
"Oh, right," I laugh. I hadn't thought of that. He climbs out of bed and makes his way down the hallway. When he comes back in, he has a very sad smile on his face.
He throws my phone down on the bed, then he turns to leave the room. "I think I'll go wash this shit off my face now." There is no humor in his voice and it makes me worried.
I pick up the phone and see three missed calls from Avery and two texts.
Avery: Fight tonight, 8pm, please be there.
Avery: Answer your phone!!!!! i need u there!!!!! please..... Its the one against Spike....
Shit!
I look at the time. Its four minutes past eight. It's already started. I don't know what to do, I really don't. Even if I left now, by the time I got there it'll be over. I stand up and walk down the hall to the bathroom. The door is closed but I open it, not even knocking. Pierce's hands are on the sink and he is leaning forward, looking down. I don't think he even notices me.
"Go," he says. Okay, so he does notice me.
I walk forward and wrap my arms around him. "No, I'm staying."
I think I surprise us both. I couldn't go, not after seeing him like this. I know I owe it to Avery, I really do, but it's too late now. There is no use in hurting Pierce to show up to a fight that has already ended.
"Cassie, he is probably going to lose the fight if you're not there."
"It shouldn't matter if I'm there or not. We're not together. He needs to focus on his fighting."
He turns his head to look at me and his lips are hinting towards a smile. "You underestimate your worth."
I roll my eyes and smack his butt. "Cook me some food wench."
His laughter lightens the tension surrounding us. "I thought I was your bitch."
"That too," I laugh out. I wink at him then strut towards his bedroom again. I slide on one of his tee-shirts from his dresser then walk back into the kitchen. He threw on his jeans without his boxer briefs. He is shirtless and barefoot and holy fuck he is so goddamn sexy!
He pulls a few things from the fridge and heats them up for us, then we sit at his kitchen table and eat. "Is it safe to say you're spending the night?"
I look up at him as I'm finishing off the rest of my food. "Yeah," I say with a smile.
"Good." He finishes his food, then stands up, grabbing both our plates. He places them in the sink and walks to the living room. "Movie?"
I hop up and pad towards the living room as well. "Yeah, that sounds great."
We cuddle on the couch together while watching some stupid so called comedy about a bunch of stoners. I don't think either of us laugh once and I'm not even sure why we finish the dang thing. When it does finally end, he looks down at me and gives me a weird expression. "I think I just lost IQ points watching that."
Laughing, I elbow at his stomach. "You're the one who put it in. That was ridiculous."
"Yeah, it really was." He stands up. "Want another movie
or?" His eyebrows wiggle suggestively.
"I want the or." I stand up and run towards the bedroom, laughing as he chances after me.
Chapter Eleven
Avery doesn't return or answer my phone call for two weeks. When he finally does, he snaps at me. "What?"
I cringe at the anger in his voice. "I'm sorry Avery!" I nearly yell it at him.
I can hear him sigh. "Whatever, it's not a big deal. Just stop blowing my phone up. I got a lot of shit going on."
"I didn't mean to miss your fight. I could have explained myself if you'd have answered."
"Oh, don't worry, I've been told by everyone about you and your boy toy. I thought you would have gotten the hint, but apparently you're just not that smart."
"Why are you always insulting me when you're angry?"
"You just don't get it, do you?" He laughs but it's dry and bitter. "I say mean things because it'll hurt you Cassie. You fucking rip my god damn heart out, over and over, so yeah, I'm going to do something to hurt you too. Did you really have to start fucking the bastard right after we broke up? Huh? Well fuck you too."
The phone goes silent and I look to see he ended the call. Out of anger, I throw it and it hits the wall, shattering to pieces. Great! I walk over and pick it up the same time tears flow from my eyes. Always, always screwing things up. I just don't learn.
I remind myself, this is what you wanted Cassie. You said it yourself, you're going to let him go. It'll hurt him less in the long run. If I keep him at a distance, I can't fuck with his feelings, I can't break his heart, and he'll eventually be happy. It's best for him, even if it hurts him right now.
It's the most fucked up logic, but I know in the end he'll be okay. We'll both be okay.
I toss my phone into the kitchen drawer, get dressed, then I head out the door. Today is the day of Aubrey's baby shower. It's at her mom's house, so I head over there to help decorate. I already brought all my gifts over yesterday. Her mom bought the crib, and I bought the bed set, so I put the bed set together inside the crib.
I also bought the diaper bag and filled it with random things for the baby, and bought a few outfits that I wrapped nicely. It should be an amazing shower and I'm quite excited for my best friend.
Stella is there helping her mom get things set up. I'm not sure why, she probably got paid by her dad to help. As everything finally starts to look nice and put together, with a little bit of arguing between Stella and I, guests start arriving. By the time everyone gets here, there are around fifty people filling the living room right up.
We silence as we hear Mason's truck slow to a stop. I know Aubrey is going to get the hint when she sees all the vehicles outside but I'm very anxious to see her face when she walks in.
It lights up and she instantly starts crying. Mason wraps his arms around her and helps her move into the living room as she seems frozen in place. "Wow, I wasn't expecting this quite yet! Wow. It looks great. Thanks so much, everyone." Her eyes take everything in as she gushes about all the little details, everything from the balloons to the presents to the cake.
Mason kisses and tells her to call when she is done. I sit next to her and write down all the gifts and who they're from, while her mom brings the presents to her and places them away from her when she is done. She got nearly everything she needs for the baby, including hundreds in gift cards, so she can buy whatever she didn't receive. I believe the only big gift she didn't get is the car seat.
It's interesting in the amount of people who bought pink and blue. Some people are determined they know the sex of the baby. It was the hardest part in the baby shower shopping, not knowing if she was having a boy or girl. Of course, everyone will be happy with whatever she has, but that poor child is going to be dressed mostly in yellow, green, and white.
One game we mashed different candy bars into a diaper, and passed them around. The guests had to guess which chocolate bar was in the diaper without touching or tasting it. It looked like pooped, since we heated in the microwave before smashing it. It was actually pretty gross but so very funny. The second game was a questionnaire about the mom and dad to be. Last thing we did was have everyone make a dollar bet, which we put into a jar for now, and everyone said when she'd have the baby, the weight the baby would be, and the sex. Whoever comes the closest when the baby is born wins the entire jar. Her mom is hanging on to it until the time comes.
We eat some food and cake, then the guests leave one by one, all giving Aubrey hugs on the way out. I'm shocked more than ever when Stella walks over, rubs Aubrey's belly and gives her a hug. Is she softening up? I didn't think that day would ever happen. Then again, babies will do things to you like that.
"Do you want me to come over and help you set things up in the nursery?" I ask Aubrey once almost everyone is gone.
"Oh, that is okay, actually. Thanks though." She seems a little fidgety when she replies.
"Is uh, everything okay?"
She looks sad and glances down at her belly that she is rubbing. "It's just that I needed some masculine help with different things in the apartment before the baby is born and Mason asked Avery to help. So he is there right now. I just don't want you guys fighting or there to be too much tension. I don't need any added stress."
"Oh, of course Aubrey. That's okay. If you need help later this week, call me. Oh. Crap!"
She gives me a strange look at my randomness.
"I broke my phone this morning. I need to go get one, but I have to run to my mom’s first."
"Oh, that sucks. Okay, well I'll call you tonight or tomorrow. I miss seeing you most days."
I hug her to me. "I know, I miss you tons too."
I head over to my mom’s house, and there is an extra car parked in the driveway. I knock on the door before entering, in case it's her lawyer or something, I don't want to bother them. She answers the door while laughing, but it quickly fades when she spots me. "Why are you knocking?"
I point towards the car. "Didn't want to interrupt if you were with the divorce lawyer or something."
"Oh, no, actually, I'm glad you're here."
I walk in when she moves out of the way and wait for her to tell me what she seems to want to say. "I've met someone."
Whoa, not what I was expecting, not at all. "You did?"
She looks bashful and it's actually pretty adorable. "Yeah, Dianne claimed I should use one of those internet dating websites. I was a little reluctant on it, and thought I'd meet a serial killer or something, but I gave it a go anyways. We started talking about a month ago but I wanted to wait until I was sure about him before I told you. Last night was our fourth date and we've decided to take the next step and become official. I was planning on telling everyone this week or next."
I smile at my mom, very excited for her. I hope he is a good guy. She walks towards the living room and I follow behind her.
"Jerry, this is my daughter Cassandra that I told you about. Cassandra, this is Jerry Little." He holds his hand out and I shake it. It's a nice, firm grip and he is a pretty attractive older man. He is balding but what he does have of hair is a light brown. His eyes are round and almost a golden brown. I'm pretty sure he is at least five years her elder, but they look good together. He seems just as happy about my mom as she does him, and my heart swells for them.
"Nice to finally meet you Cassandra, I've heard a lot about you."
"Thanks, Jerry. It's nice to meet you as well."
I sit down in the recliner as my mom joins him on the couch. She leans forward, towards me more, probably feeling uncomfortable. "So what brings you here today?"
"Can't I just visit my mom once in a while?" I tease her. I actually still come over weekly for a drink out back on her back-beach-yard in front of the fire. It's become a tiny tradition between the two of us. I still haven't opened up to her about Avery's and my break up, and I certainly haven't told her that I've hung around Pierce more often than not these past two weeks. Besides that though, I've been honest and open about a lot.
She smiles. "Oh, of course you can, you know that. But I also know you and there is something you want or need."
"Fine," I give in. "I may have broken my phone today and was wondering if I could use your update credit to get me a new phone?" I flutter my lashes at her and give her a pleading face.
Laughing she shakes her head at me. "Oh, what am I going to do with you. Alright, fine, fine, I suppose that would be okay."
I stand and walk over to her, giving her a hug. "Thanks mom. I owe you big time." I look over to Jerry and give him a genuine smile. "Nice meeting you. I'm happy for you both."
My mom ends up standing and walks me to the door after Jerry says goodbye in return. She gives me a kiss on the cheek before I walk out the door. "You okay sweetie? You look a little sad. How was Aubrey's shower?"
"I'm fine mom," I tell her, giving her a small smile. "It was great, she got just about everything she needs and a lot she doesn't. She is working on the nursery right now." I take a step back, stepping onto the stoop outside.
"Oh, why aren't you there?" she asks. I had a feeling she would, which is why I started backing away.
I take another step down, trying not to trip as I go backwards. "Had errands to run," I tell her. It's only a partial lie. "Gotta go, thanks again mom, and awesome news you're dating now. Love you."
I turn to walk towards the car as she tell me she loves me too.
It takes over an hour to get a new phone and get all my contacts loaded from my account. I grab something from the grocery store, then I head home for another lonely Saturday night. I have been spending quite a bit more time with Pierce, but we're not dating or anything like that. I haven't been able to have that final talk with Avery yet, even though I know we're not going to be more than friends ever again, I'd at least like to know if we can ever be just friends. One day.