As for our relationship, well... I was still living apart from him. I wasn’t wearing my wedding ring and, for now, that’s what I wanted. Forgiving him didn’t mean that I had to forget. Trust was something that had to be earned, and it didn’t come by someone just saying that you could trust them. I was well aware that Jaylin had some issues from his past that he had failed to deal with; he needed to correct those more for himself and not so much for me.
He seemed to be on a path to recovery and I was glad about that. Jaylin’s recognizing his own faults made it easier to be around him; and because of our children, we continued to spend an enormous amount of time together. There was never a chance that we’d go one day without seeing or talking to each other. I was still so deeply in love with Jaylin. Whenever I needed a laugh, a friend or a shoulder to cry on, he was there. If I had a sexual urge, I could always count on him to satisfy my needs. Yeah, it was going down whenever I wanted it to, and making love to him was something I didn’t want to depart with.
Right after the opening celebration and evening ceremony was over last night, Jaylin and I went back to my condo and celebrated alone. Our evening together was so perfect; in the morning, I stood looking out the picture window, thinking about us slow dancing last night in pure darkness. It was as if the earth had stood still. One slow jam after another, we embraced each other in silence. We didn’t even get a chance to make love, but that was fine by me.
Thoughts of our long lives together consumed our minds and we both accepted that this was ultimately where our journey together had led us. As I continued in thought, Jaylin came up from behind, dressed in his black silk pajama pants that tied at his waist. He wrapped his arms around me, kissing my cheek.
“What’s for breakfast?” he asked. “Or do we even care right now?”
I turned, placing my arms on his shoulders and looking into his eyes. We hadn’t had sex in almost a month, but I always looked forward to being intimate with the love of my life. “I’m a little hungry too,” I said. “Do you have any suggestions?”
“Plenty.”
We smiled, backing up to the bed and laughing as we plopped down on it. Many things in our lives had changed. At the end of the day, however, the love that we carried in our hearts for each other would always remain the same.
Jaylin halted our kisses and got up from the bed. I sat up on my elbows, watching him close the door. Not only the door to my bedroom, but the door to his world as well. Finally he was willing to step into our world, a world that was pieced back together as best as we both could do it!
Epilogue
JAYLIN
Yeah, yeah, I know. A book ain’t supposed to have two epilogues, but that was Nokea’s take on things, here’s mine. You ever hear the saying “You never miss a good thing until it’s gone”?
Well, many of us can say that, and I’m sure there are those who look back at their past relationships, wishing they had done things differently. That’s the case with me. If I could turn back the hands of time, yes, I would have made better choices. At this point, Nokea wasn’t gone completely, but in no way was I 100 percent satisfied with where things stood between us.
Simply put, I want my wife back; in no way was I giving up! At this point, I felt as if I was ready to be everything that she needed me to be. I had learned some important things over time; but the one thing that I know for sure is, I could not profess love for two women and make both of them happy. Someone had to lose, and it was only fair that it was me. Scorpio was busy doing her thing. Even though she claimed to be content with the way things were, I knew that she deserved better. I didn’t know if she would ever find it, because it was pretty damn hard to top me. Either way, the door was opened for her to go after it, and I’d always given the ones I’d loved options.
Nokea seemed to be moving on as well. For now, I was learning to cope with her being away from me. I was lucky—damn lucky—that she was willing to give me any of her time at all. Bottom line is, I’d made my bed, and I had to be man enough to lie in it. Most of the time, alone, but I was still hopeful that my wife would one day come home, where she belonged.
I want some more of those babies too; I have to stay optimistic. With that, just wanted to thank readers for all of the love and I’m delighted to have gotten to know many of you on Facebook and through e-mails. The entire Naughty Series was based on many of my experiences, as well as the author’s own life. Better than most, Brenda Hampton knows that sometimes life can be good ... great, but it can also deal you a fucked-up hand.
When you throw a brotha like me in the mix, ain’t no telling what can happen. Stay up, as your today doesn’t dictate what your tomorrow will bring. Ask yourself, who is in the driver’s seat of your life? Make sure it’s you, and no one else!
I’ve enjoyed my part in all of this, but it’s time for me to shut it down and move on to bigger and better things. I won’t say good-bye, only say I’ll someday see you at the movies, in a television series, play or on DVD.
Sounds good? Then make some noise with me; as I will tell you, the story goes on. Share the Naughty Series with everyone you know, and let’s show the directors in Hollywood what’s really up! Tell BET, Bounce TV, VH1, Bravo, OWN ... all of the cable networks to get on it! I’m definitely up for the challenge. But when you think about it, haven’t I always been?
My Naughty Angels in Jaylin’s World on Facebook, y’all know we have shown our asses over the years. People have laughed at us, pointed fingers and even shook their heads with disgust. Many have joined us, though, and I couldn’t have made it through my more challenging days without you ladies in my corner. I’m sure I have healed some aching and troubled hearts too. So what Facebook has joined together, let no one put asunder. With two fingers in the air, peace and, yes, All Love... Jay Baby.
Urban Books, LLC
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Deer Park, NY 11729
Jaylin’s World: Dare to Live in It Copyright © 2012 Brenda Hampton
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means without prior consent of the Publisher, except brief quotes used in reviews.
ISBN: 978-1-5998-3264-7
This is a work of fiction. Any references or similarities to actual events, real people, living, or dead, or to real locales are intended to give the novel a sense of reality. Any similarity in other names, characters, places, and incidents is entirely coincidental.
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